How To Make A Happy Marriage: 5 Intelligent Things You Must Do
How To Make A Happy Marriage
You Can Also Make a Happy Marriage
When Akua fell in love with Kwame, it was a dream come true. All her expectations were met.
“Kwame treats me like a princess. He is very complimentary, affectionate, warm, tender, loving, caring, and very appreciative. He always tells me how much he loves me and showers me with all sorts of gifts. I am in heaven. I never knew marriage could be so sweet. I wish all married couples could experience what we are experiencing. We are very, very happy in our marriage.”
You may also be married, but your marriage may not be as enjoyable as Akua’s marriage. What are some of the things you can do to make a man, or a woman, happy in a marriage so that married life will be blissful for you and your spouse?
I Want A Happy Marriage
Do you have a happy marriage? Do you think you are really enjoying your marriage, or you are just counting the days and hoping that death, or something else, will cause your marriage to break up? Do you want your spouse to be happy? What are some of the things you can do to make your marriage a happy one? What makes a happy marriage?
No one was born with a "happy marriage gene," but you can receive good advice which can serve as a happy marriage guide and help you to achieve a happy marriage.
Below I give you happy marriage facts that will help you have a happy marriage. If you consistently implement them, and try to make yourself the kind of spouse you want your better-half to be, you will have a ''happy marriage house'' where there is a lot of joy, fun, peace, harmony, and goodwill. You and your spouse will be the ultimate beneficiaries in the long run.
Make Peace In Time
For a husband and wife to have a happy marriage, there must be peace in the home. It is one of the happy marriage ''keys.'' If husband and wife are always quarreling, or do not resolve conflicts with alacrity, these conflicts will linger, poison the love a husband has for his wife, or a wife has for her husband, and weaken the marriage bond. As Theologian, Rev. William Barclay puts it, “again and again it is the experience of life that, if a quarrel, or a difference, or a dispute is not healed immediately, it can go on breeding worse and worse trouble as time goes on.”
Bitterness tends to breed bitterness. It has often happened that a quarrel between two people has descended to their families, and has been inherited by future generations. If at the very beginning one of the parties had had the grace to apologize or to admit fault, a very grievous situation would never have arisen.
A happy marriage is the union of two forgivers. When you have a disagreement with your spouse, you must endeavor to get the situation right straight away. It may mean that you must be humble enough to confess to your spouse that you are wrong and to make apology; it may mean that, even if you are right, you have to take the first step towards healing the breach. Do not feel proud to take the first step. Do not see it as being demeaning. You do not lose anything when you humble yourself. In fact, it is a sign of greatness and maturity to humble yourself. When personal relations go wrong, in about nine cases out of ten, immediate action will mend them. But if you do not take that immediate action, your relationship will continue to deteriorate, and the bitterness will spread in an ever-widening circle, affecting your emotions, affecting your psyche, making you unhappy, making it difficult for you to relate lovingly with your spouse.
Keep Temptation In Check
Adultery is one thing that destroys marriages.
Husband, do your best to keep memories of your wife always in your mind. If there are many beautiful women in your office, for example, and you are sometimes tempted to lust after them, take a picture of your wife when you are going to the office. You can call this a ''happy marriage picture.'' When thoughts come to your mind tempting you to have an affair with someone other than your wife, pray for God to strengthen you. And then take the picture of your wife and look at it for some time. Focus on it. Remember the vows you made to her when you married her and determine to remain faithful to her.
Wife, you can also do the same thing. It will make you a better wife.
Anything that will cause you to be unfaithful to your spouse should be ruthlessly uprooted out of your life. If in your marriage there is a habit which can be a seduction to be unfaithful to your wife or your husband, you must deal with it. For example some couples like watching pornography. But pornography is devil inspired. There are demons behind it. When you watch it, you expose yourself and your marriage to demonic attacks from Satan. These attacks may include Satan trying to influence you to commit adultery, so that your marriage will break up. So avoid watching pornography, if you want to have a happy marriage life.
If in your marriage there is an association which can be the cause of this adultery, you must break that association. For example, if you realize that you are becoming very close with a lady at your work place in the case of husbands, or with a gentleman who seems to be treating you nicely in the case of wives, try to stay away physically and emotionally when you see that you are developing feelings for that person. Make every effort never to be alone with that person.
Deal With Bad Thoughts
Perhaps you have seen a woman you are attracted to and you have been having thoughts about having an affair with her. Or you are not satisfied with your husband and you are battling with thoughts to sleep with another man. If you do not deal effectively with these thoughts, your marriage will not succeed.
There is one way in which you cannot successfully deal with forbidden thoughts and desires- and that is to create happy marriage images in your head. Imagine the joys you will have when your marriage is a happy one. It will inspire you to want the marriage to be a happy one.
Deal with bad thoughts by engaging in something when these thoughts come into your head. The best way is to fill your life with so much labor that there is no time for these thoughts to enter your head. Think so much about your wife or husband. Let their thoughts fill your mind.
When you are away from your spouse, for example when you go on a trip, think about some memorable times you have shared in your marriage. Take your photo album with you and look through the pages. Watch a video of your wedding ceremony. Record love messages of your wife or husband on your phone or laptop, and play these messages when tempting thoughts assail your mind. Rid yourself of a diseased and morbid introspection by concentrating not on yourself but on your spouse.
You can also buy happy marriage cards, or happy marriage gifts and send it to your spouse. Or better still, send him or her happy marriage text messages, or happy marriage pictures, or happy marriage notes to let them know you are thinking of them.
You may have been born into a wealthy family where all your needs were provided for. You never knew what it was like to be in want. But later after you married, your husband is not able to provide you with all your needs and so you are disillusioned with the marriage, and you think you are not having a happy marriage life. You must learn contentment. You must learn how, in whatever state you find yourself, to be content. Your contentment should not be in wealth. Your contentment should be in God and in the companionship of your husband.
Covetousness is one thing that can destroy your desire to be content. But you must fight the desire to be dissatisfied, to be unhappy when you are in want, and to sulk when you cannot get all that you want.
Be happy with your husband. There are many women who are looking for husbands and as yet have not found some. You are blessed to have someone to love you. Be thankful for that. Be thankful that he has given you beautiful, adorable children. It will make him love you more and be committed to making the marriage a happy one.
Be happy about the gifts and talents you have. Do not envy another couple’s money, wealth or possessions. The happiness of a marriage does not depend on the abundance of the things you have. It depends on spending quality time together as a couple.
If your husband makes time for you, be content with that. If your wife spends her time to cook for you, be content with that. Do not desire to be like someone else. Be content with your wife or husband. When you are content with your spouse, God will bless your marriage and make you have a happy marriage.
Respect Your Spouse
One thing you can do to make a happy marriage is to make sure you respect each other, and treat one another with decorum, honor, and dignity.
- When you promise to do something for your spouse, make sure you deliver on that promise. This will show your husband, or your wife, that you place so much value on him or her that you do whatever you can to follow through on your promises. It makes your spouse feel very valuable, which will make him or her also want to make you happy in the marriage, with the result that there will be harmony in the marriage, which will make the marriage a happy one.
- You do not lose anything if you say “Sorry,” or “Please,” or “Excuse me,” if you offend your spouse, want to ask for a favor, or fail to deliver on a promise and try to make amends. Saying these words shows respect, and can help to maintain the harmony in the marriage.
- When your spouse offends you, do not brood, grumble under your breath, and refuse to talk to him or her. That does not show respect. Instead, open up and tell your spouse your mind when you feel you have been offended.
- Make it a habit never to disgrace your spouse in front of others by insulting him or her, or ridiculing his or her intelligence before their friends, your friends, or your family members. Instead, make your spouse look good in the eyes of others. Talk about his or her great qualities, and when you are alone with him or her, or when you are in your bedroom, reprimand him or her for any wrong thing they may have done. This is how to make a happy marriage!
- Never make fun of the parts of your spouse you find unattractive.
- Never refer to your husband or wife’s terrible past life (if they had a tough childhood, or suffered abuse, or led a promiscuous life), humble beginnings, or lack of manners. Let them enjoy the present with you. It will help you to make your marriage a happy one.
Developing a happy marriage is a challenge that you can deal with if you apply the principles I have outlined above. Use these happy marriage tips to create that dream marriage you always wanted to have.
How To Make A Happy Marriage
Are you happy in your marriage?
© 2014 Isaac Yaw Asiedu Nunoofio