20 Fun Things to do Before Having a Kid
Before Baby Fever Kicks In
You know someone with a kid. Your social media feeds' probably became a mini-daycare by the time your friends, acquaintances and people you hardly knew discovered they're expecting! Soon you received the following posts about baby-bumps, baby-parties, and baby's first burp.
If you're not currently with child, you may be wondering: what should I do before I sneeze out a mini-me of my own? If you're not sure what to do before the chains of childbearing are attached to your ankles, try the suggestions below:
1. Write a Book
Tons of writers have children before their books are even thought of. And, then there are others who treat each book as a precious child. Sometimes writing a book takes just as much time (or longer) to create than a kid.
2. Babysit Your Friend's Kids
You might be looking forward to being a parent. What's more exciting than returning to your childhood, spending time with your best friend's kid. And, then, when the chaos of having a kid stresses you out. Take him home to his parents.
3. Quit your Day Job & Follow Your Passion
If you don't have to worry about another mouth to feed (besides a pet and yourself). Then, consider quitting your day job and doing what you want to do. No one's crying and forcing you to work somewhere you loathe. If you want to be that food truck owner. Do it. Now's your chance.
4. Get Schooled
If you want to avoid another four to six years of terror, skip college. However, that doesn't mean you should quit learning. There are alternatives to getting an education. And, without kids, your brain can focus on tasks that interest you such as coding or possibly String Theory.
5. Go to a Concert
There's no need to hire a babysitter. Just pre-game, hire an Uber, and head to the concert. Maybe, if you play your cards right you'll be able to spend the night backstage with that hot drummer that kept eyeing you and his three thousand fans!
6. Drink Wine while Bathing
If you have a bath tub. Skip the Mr. Bubbles. And, pour some bubbly. A glass of Moscato and Sade CD should help ease your troubles. And, here's the bonus, there's no one to argue with about toys going down the drain.
7. Sleep in on the Weekend
Your only worry in the morning is rolling over and getting in time for brunch. There's no last minute homework assignments, little leagues or practices, and no Chuck E. Cheese.
Mo Money, Mo Options
With the holidays right around the corner. Parents will envy you. You actually get to spend your money on yourself? You selfish, son of a... Well, while your friends with kids is deciding between a Barbie or the latest Disney DVD. You'll be purchasing something you can enjoy.
8. Vacation is All You Ever Wanted
With more money and plenty of sleep, you can go on vacation. Maybe, you're sick of rainy days and wintry weather. You don't have to plan a little person's trip or wait for school breaks. All you have to do is grab your toothbrush, a ride, and a working GPS. And, the world is yours.
9. Take that Promotion
You might've been given the opportunity at your company to move to their newest office in a different country. Children may prevent you from being adventurous. But, no worries, you can take that job, make that money, and learn that language.
10. Make time for Friends
Some people throw away their friends after kids. You don't have to deal with that. If your friends ditch you for their kid. Don't give them a hard time. But, if you're child-free and care-free. Do you. Have fun with your friends. Build a stronger relationship. Make yourself happier through the company of others.
11. New Cuisine
Go on Pinterest find a recipe that you think would be awesome and make it. There's no one to tell you that "they don't want it" or "it tastes funny". You can explore your culinary skills. And, maybe make it on Chopped..., or keep dreaming.
12. Go to an Amusement Park... Alone
You cannot truly understand the joy of going to Disney World, until you've gone alone. As in, with a fellow adult friend. You can walk around. Go on rides. There's no strollers. No long lines to the potty. No one asking you for a pair of ears. You can buy them for yourself. Yay!
13. Go to the Movies
This is big. Going to the movies. Not an animated one. A violent action flick, or a romantic comedy. You are just sitting there. No one crying, whimpering, or talking. Just you and the screen. And, the best part is, if the movie gets a bit sketchy. You can stay there guilt free watching it.
14. Decorate your Space
There is no playroom, no kid's space, no family room (unless you're in a relationship). There is the man-cave. The she-den, The booze room. The fancy white couch area. The shoes-don't-belong here room. And, so on.
15. Get Your Dream Car
You know that person who owns the gas guzzling van that fits eight snuggly? Yeah, they're not you. Because, you can get the coupe. Or, better yet, how about a sick bike.
No need to hire the clown or the SpongeBob Impersonator. As long as there's enough cubed cheese, crackers, and wine. You're good. Don't forget your entertainment for the night, that DJ who loves DMX almost as much as you.
17. Bragging Rights
Have you met that person with kids, who starts rambling about little Johnny who loves to eat scrambled eggs with ketchup. Well, you have something important to share as well. You need to tell this proud parent, you just slept through the night, without getting up once to help someone look through their closet for monsters.
Hike through the Rockies. Boat down to the Florida Keys. Fly to New York and then take the redeye to L.A. Get kicked out of a casino in Vegas. And, sleep under the stars in Alaska. It doesn't matter where you go. You'll have fun, get into trouble, and not have to worry about your kid not having the best time ever.
19. Get a Pet
You can be foster parent to animals that are transitioning to another home. Or you can start your exotic pet collection. There's no need to put your pet through undo stress, by getting them used to your kid. And, you don't have to worry about the safety of your kid if your pet python gets out of its cage.
20: Take Care of Your Health
Taking care of kids is a full time job. If you're sick, you can't call in, you press on. But, if you don't have kids, you can focus on living a long life and taking care of your mental, physical, and spiritual well-being.
Bonus: Get Married???
Maybe, you want to have kids some day. You're just waiting for Mr. Right. Kids need two parents. Sure, everyone's a single mom or a single dad, or they're co-parenting. There's nothing wrong with those parents, and their kids come up normal or if not better than their parents. But, kids need to know both sides of their heritage and it's a good idea to be married or at least in a committed relationship before popping a kernel.
There's probably something I'm missing. Please, in the comments, tell me what fun things you can do before kids?