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Top 10 Ways To Screw Up a Relationship With The Woman You Love

Updated on February 8, 2011

Okay Gentlemen, Take Notes

Ladies, you know that we are true art enthusiasts at heart because we all know what it means to see a beautiful painting from far away, and realize how quickly it changes once we spend time examining the specks. In case you're wondering what this has to do with the article, then know that I'm talking about men. They change. They grow or should I say in some cases turn sour. And while there are many out there that are just a dream this article goes out to those that don't seem to have a clue as to what may or may not piss us off as women. So to all the confused fellas, this is for you.

1. Wait, Who Are You Again?

It never fails. You meet a guy and think you know him and all of a sudden, presto, he turns into somebody else. This is the best kind of magic I've ever seen. Or should I say, acting. What happened to the days when guys offered spending time with you to get to know you and have fun and actually meant it? Seems as though once they've conquered their mission, sex, they let the gloves off. They reveal their true identity. You know, the one that doesn't give a crap. Guys there are many ladies out there who are willing match your intent. Some gals really just want sex too. Stop pretending to be the guy of a gal's dreams just to get what you want. It's beyond lame and in this day and age, quite dangerous.

2. Liar, Liar Pants On Fire

Alright ladies, let's stop asking guys to look us in the eyes and tell us the truth. It doesn't work. They lie anyway. They're amazing at it. Some claim they learned it from us. Yeah, whatever! It doesn't make it right. Now am I saying that I really want to know that you've sleep with nearly 100 women before you met me. No! But if I ask you this question, it is so much better to be smooth about it and say something like "I'm not going to lie. I've been with a lot of women. But that was my past and you are my future. To me, right now, that's all that matters." I would gladly accept an answer like that and move on than to hear "I've only had 2 serious relationships." Yet my homegals fill me in on the fact that you used to attempt to collect any girl's number you could get your hands on. Really, dude. Really!

3. Hello. Are You Listening To Me?

Sure we ladies do talk a lot. But that only means we have a need to be heard. Guys, are they really listening? Not all the time. How about the classic nod and constant yeah while they watch tv or play video games? This is not something hard to do yet for them it is. When women move on to someone else, one of the reasons they will give is that the guy they are with listens to them. Remember gentlemen, you don't have to have all the answers. We just have to know you care enough to pay attention to the problems.

4. So You Say She's Just A Friend

If you are my man, why do you need a female friend who's not my friend? Why would I want some other chick I don't know to know all my business? Unless, you're out making a life with her as well, I don't see the need for a friend like that. I just don't buy the just a friend bid. A guy is all for getting calls from other women and they immediately claim friendship until the shoe is on the other foot. Respect the feelings of your girl by adoring her above all others. If you really love her, you wouldn't even second guess a decision like dropping the flies to commit to the queen bee.

5. Romance? No Chance!

You don't have to deliver a dozen fresh red roses everyday to provide a little romance in the relationship. Just saying "I love you" ain't enough. There comes a time when you have to show it. Get creative and make it special. This is something that you and her will remember for the rest of your lives. When you are too old to do most of the things you can do now, don't you want be able to reminisce on moments that were priceless. Not ones filled with the routine activities of life. But the ones that you know were worth living with the girl you felt you couldn't live without.

6. I'm Right. You're Wrong. So What.

When two people can't get along, someone always have to be right. Guys you don't have to be right to do the right thing. We make mistakes and sometimes we need to know that when we're wrong, you are willing to help our mistakes instead of criticize them. We can be pretty emotional when it comes to taking criticism from the one we love. And guys, when you are the ones who are wrong, be willing to admit it. Don't let your pride keep you from making up in the relationship because you're unwilling to accept guilt. We are able to forgive if you are willing to allow some change in your life. It's all about working together.

7. Your Ego Is As Big As A Rainbow. And It Ain't Pretty.

When a guy knows he's got it together, he can be unbearable to be around. You suddenly find yourself in a relationship where you are doing all the work, the calling, caring, loving, etc. Guys stop using your looks, sex, and anything else you have to lure women to do what you want. At some point in your life you're going to realize this game you're playing is a living nightmare to the women you've lured in the game with you. And things have a way of coming back around, only it brings a double portion of what was put out. Be careful.

8. You Don't Understand!

Funny how women take on a mountain of emotional pressure and men sit back and seem to utter "you'll be alright". They so minimize our feelings. Guys, I know that you will never be able to truly know what a woman goes through but it doesn't mean that you shouldn't do everything you can to try an be as supportive and sympathetic to those needs and feelings. Being understanding is not an act, it's an attitude, and you're attitude should be one of complete assistance to the one you love.

9. Do You Really Want Me?

Some women feel as though they have to compete for their men's affections daily. You have online porn, magazines, videos, movies and every other media outlet out there that reminds women of their imperfections. The moment a guy pays more attention to another woman by staring at her in front of his woman, watching her booty as she walks by, and even overly admiring famous beauties in the media, it gets our insecurities mounted up and standing in line. Guys, you have to understand that one of the worst things for a woman is to know that she's made you her world while feeling like you've made her your pet. Something that just cute to be around and hang out with. Now fellas, you may not be the cause of her insecurities but you should not provoke them either. There are some things you just don't do. Don't compare her to other women you've had. Don't use porn as a way substituting sex with her. Don't disrespect her by constantly staring at other women in her presence. It's considered a low blow.

10. Do I Always Have To Do Everything

Ever felt like your man was your child? It's not hard to feel that way. Most of us cook, clean, do the laundry, take care of household needs, make sure the bills are paid on time and take care of the kids. It can seem as though we do it all. If this is your life, men, you must step up and take some pressure off your lovely lady. She needs it. If not, she'll be extremely burnt out which would be the cause of many arguments even if those arguments that have entirely nothing to do with housework. Give her a break once in a while. Make a plan that once or twice a week, you'll be the one taking the responsiblities of the household all on your own. A less stressed woman equals a happy household. Trust.

Time To Dish

Alright ladies, what are your thoughts additions and feelings. Time to tell 'em straight and save some couples that are on rocky roads. Learning is the best key to growing. I look forward to reading your responses.


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    • Levertis Steele profile image

      Levertis Steele 

      6 years ago from Southern Clime

      You write, "If this is your life, men, you must step up and take some pressure off your lovely lady. She needs it. If not, she'll be extremely burnt out which would be the cause of many arguments even if those arguments that have entirely nothing to do with housework. Give her a break once in a while. Make a plan that once or twice a week, you'll be the one taking the responsiblities of the household all on your own. "

      When the wife is worn from a job, the children, their activities, the house cleaning, laundry, the cooking, dropping off kids and picking them up, how can she always be ready to take care of bedroom needs when she is battered? This is the time that men who do not want to step in and help pretend that it is their right to be with other women. They are not that dumb; they know that their wives have many jobs to perform.

      Before I married my husband, I informed him that if he wanted a maid, he needed to hire one before the wedding. If not, household work and any kids were ours to share. He had a chance to back out. If anything around the house went undone, even cooking, he was satisfied with quick fixings and never complained. Did this pave the way and solve problems? Well, not quite, but, when jobs were not done, he did not complain. If he did not want to do anything to help, he did not do it. Yes, I had most of the homework, but he was careful to never complain about any lacking. If I did not have time to prepare supper, he was careful to zip his lips. He went out for something, put together leftovers, or warmed canned soup and made sandwiches. That worked.


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