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3 Signs Your Mate Is a Perfect Marriage Fit

Updated on June 4, 2014
Elaine Flowers profile image

Elaine Flowers is the co-author of "So... How Was Your Date? Dating Chronicles Of Single Men and Women" and the author of five other titles.

A Perfect Fit?

Can You Answer 'Yes' To These 3 Questions?

You have been dating for a while and thoughts and discussions of marriage have come up. Your partner is wonderful and would make a great spouse. All that is cool, but will he or she make a good partner for you? Just because someone is husband or wife material doesn’t mean that you should be designing a plan for marriage with him or her in mind. “For better or worse, for richer for poorer” are not just poetic verses recited by an officiator when joining two people together. That is real talk. So, here is a quick test for you to take, and if you’re on the right track, you will easily answer YES to all of these questions.

Imagine that you have a crystal ball and this is what you see awaiting you in the future with your prospective spouse.

Scenario 1

A month after you marry Prince Charming he has some devastating financial woes. Your mansion is in foreclosure and that sparkling E-Class he gave you has been repossessed—you’ve lost everything and the two of you have to move into a homeless shelter for an undetermined amount of time. If you could see into the future and knew this in advance, would you still take the plunge? Would you be that “ride or die” chick and follow him to a shelter or under a bridge?

Scenario 2

Your wife has a figure like a Coke bottle for the first year of your marriage but five years and three kids later she gains 150 pounds and shows no sign of backing away from the dinner table. Or, God forbid she has some sort of facial disfiguring accident requiring extensive plastic surgery but never to regain the beauty of her youth. Do you love her character enough? Do you love what’s on the inside? Or just as importantly, do you like the person she is enough to forge ahead?

Scenario 3

The day after your elaborate wedding, one of you is in a debilitating accident where the other will have to provide around the clock care for the infirmed spouse for many years to come. Do you love your mate enough to take on the responsibility of caring for him or her? Do you trust the fact that the other person loves you enough to care for you?

Chances are that none of these things will happen but couples have divorced over much less. Consider these knowing that there are no right or wrong answers. The important thing is to know what to do after you’ve arrived at a conclusion. And if you can answer a resounding YES to all of the questions, and your partner can too, then you have a match made in Heaven. If you’re a little hesitant, it doesn’t mean that your relationship is doomed, it may just mean that you need more time to build and cement your love for one another.


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      4 years ago

      Very interesting!

    • Elaine Flowers profile imageAUTHOR

      Elaine Flowers 

      4 years ago from Dallas, Texas

      Great observation @catrina. I do, however, think that if a person is honest with themselves and 'within themselves', they can arrive at the truth of their relationship. When you're young and lack life experience, you tend to think certain things will never happen to you so it's easy to say YES to these starter questions, that's true. Thanks for your comment!

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      4 years ago

      Most people when standing at that altar believe they will always feel the same love forever that they feel on the day they walk down the aisle. Prior to marrying they may feel they could withstand all three of these scenarios but after cohabitating with that person for a few years those feelings may change. Once you walk down that aisle you are committed whether you like it or not. Thanks for challenging people to think past their emotions. Marriage is full od multiple challenges you named a few here that people never consider.

    • Elaine Flowers profile imageAUTHOR

      Elaine Flowers 

      4 years ago from Dallas, Texas

      Janis, thank you so much :-)

    • janshares profile image

      Janis Leslie Evans 

      4 years ago from Washington, DC

      You bring up some good points to ponder, elaine flowers. These scenarios are great examples of the extent to which partners will commit and sacrifice in the name of love. Nice post, welcome to HubPages. I saw this on Twitter and decided to pay you a visit. I look forward to more from you. Voted up and useful.


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