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warning signs you might be dating someone with a mental illness

Updated on March 21, 2012

Warning signs to let you know when to leave BEFORE your heart gets involved

These days it is hard to really know a person. Just seeing a person a couple of hours on a date a few days a week doesn't let you know what kind of person he or she is or what kind of habits they can have. Anyone can be nice for a couple of hours and seem like the perfect person. For a relationship or marriage to last you really have to know what kind of person he or she is and if you can live with that kind of person. In some cases, it would be harmful to continue seeing or marry that person. Mental illnesses cannot always be noticed right away and not everyone is a physiatrist to know what signs to look for. Listed below are a few things to lookout for so you don't fall into a harmful situation.

1. How clean are they? He or she have a car that can pass as a trash dumpster? If you see trash piled up and everything imaginable in their car that can be a sign of a hoarder and that is a mental illness that will wear you down. Plus, it is a condition that worsens as they get older. They get very agitated when you try to throw something of theirs away. Before you know it, a full scale argument has begun. How do they dress? Do they wear clothes that should have been thrown away years ago? Do they have holes? stains? You don't have to wear the latest fashion to look nice. Please don't think he just needs a woman to care for him-if a man cannot take care of his own body-he will not care about yours and especially vise versa. Woman usually are more concerned with their appearance. If you are dating one that does not seem to care about her appearance-depression might be an issue.

2. Single- He or she has not had a long term relationship-EVER-stay away from someone who is in their late 30's or early 40's and they have not had a serious relationship or at least been engaged or married. Be very wary of that person. First of all, it just means you probably will not last more than 6 months so why waste your time? Second, it would appear that commitment is an issue. And if they are the hottest thing on the planet??? Run as fast as you can in the opposite direction. Seriously.

3. Are they beyond cheap? (Which is another sign of a hoarder) If he or she is at Goodwill or thirft stores almost everyday and buys something every time, that is a problem. Additonaly, if they mention that holidays are just a gimmack to take your money-You can forget flowers or romantice candlelite dinners or anything for birthdays, holidays, special occasions. There is no romance in that kind of relationship. Then there is the constant having to buy the cheapest or used item. Never wants to buy anything new or current with the times of our tech age.

4. Constantly complains about any kind of rules and regulations? Complains when anything changes? Does he or she goes off the deep end when you change plans at the last minute? Also do they complain about their job all the time? If he or she does it on a date they will do it when you get married and it will only become worse. Be careful of being around a negative person they are contagious.

While these are just a few signs to look for they can help you when you just meet someone. Don't be too desperate that you end up with someone that would be more harmful to you. If you are lonely, find a hobby that requires a partner-scuba diving or rock climbing. Or you can join a martial arts class, work-out class. Most of the time a good friend is the best antidote for being lonely.

Listed below are links to help you with more information on hoarding and mental illnesses in general.


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    • profile image


      4 years ago

      Some of your advice is not true at all; stay away from people who are older and never been married? I have a cousin who has never been married because she was in a bad relationship and the guy was just a moron. He cared for her, but he was just a 16yr old living in a 38yr olds body! I'm 22 and I'm dating a guy who is messy, he's a computer geek too, so that means he's nuts? I think you make SOME good points, but these days everyone is a bit insane aren they? Take a look at politicians, lawyers, doctors, police officers, etc; they commit crimes or do things they know are just plain wrong yet they still walk among us freely

      everyday! Insane is when a person makes the same mistake again and again and expects their life to get better, criminally insane is when a person makes the same mistake again and again and destroys someone

      else's life in the process!

    • profile image

      4 years ago

      Terrible advice and I'm a woman that recently spent 6 week in a mental hospital

    • profile image


      4 years ago

      As if everyone with a mental illness is crazy or f..ed up.

    • Ardie profile image


      6 years ago from Neverland

      Very good signs that you might be dating someone with a mental illness. My advice if you date someone like the points above? RUN! Run as fast as you can :) Great Hub - welcome to HubPages.


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