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8 Months In and I Don't Know Much
It has been 8 months since I married Katie, this girl who I have grown very fond of.
5 months ago, I wrote an article about the dating experience Katie and I went through and the blessing it had been in just 3 months of marriage. Now, still less than a year of marriage, so many things have changed in our lives! So here is the short sequel to a young life of marriage.
What is really crazy about my relationship is when I think that my first valentines with this woman was last year! Yet I married her and said yes for the rest of our lives. We are having a different experience than a lot of people since we are starting our adult lives with each other. I don't know what it is like to have that bachelor pad, spending money on all the things I wanted in college. I'm thinking about saving for a house, paying off loans, and maybe even kids. These are just facts really, I have no regrets and our lives are different. God has a plan for all this and it would really benefit me if I would stop worrying about it. Seriously, I already have some gray hairs. I can enjoy my twenties even if I'm not a single guy with few attachments.
One thing that has become clear to me is that my convictions about marriage and relationship have stayed basically the same. Actually carrying out those convictions is a completely different thing and it can be a lot of work. Putting her before myself sounds easy to say, but nobody told me how selfish I am! Sometimes it can look like canceling my plans on a vacation day from work because my wife is feeling sick. We can't predict things like that, maybe there is some truth in the pessimistic Murphy's Law. My choice in how I should act as a husband becomes really clear when I think about that, who I am to Katie, and the promise I made. Convictions and goals can be easy to spit out, but they can be so hard to bring to life when you are called to.
Our Wedding Dance Song
In talking about convictions, it reminds me of the song Katie and I picked for our first dance at the wedding, Dancing in the Mine Fields by Andrew Peterson. It is about the fact that life is rough, marriage is rough, but I'm saying yes to live life with you through all of it. When it comes down to it, marriage is a lot about promises and this song just reminds us and speaks that truth for us in our marriage.
It's Only 8 Months...
I'm not trying to make it a bigger deal than it is, because it is just 8 months. A small fraction of the time I will be married to this woman. In 10 years when I read this, it will sound like a little kid wrote this post, but that is not what this is about. This is my perspective now as a 22 year old in his first apartment, working his first real full-time job, with his wife of 8 months.