- Gender and Relationships
10 things guys should remember before having sex for the first time
"Selling your first gun is like having sex for the first time. You have no idea what to do, but it’s exciting, and one way or another, it’s over way too fast." This was narrated by Nicholas Cage in the movie Lord of War (2005), and rightly so. This article aims to make you feel less nervous and help you enjoy the blissful act of love. It promises to give you practical tips and advice which will prepare you for your first time with a girl in bed.
1) Trim your body hair
Do women like body hair? Well that's a complicated question. But if you want to play safe, which you likely want to do when you are having sex for the first time, just make sure that you trim your body hair.
Just remember that excess body hair can sometimes be a turn off. Don't go all out and wax your entire body or engage in any other bizarre body hair treatments.
2) Take a bath and smell nice
Emptying a can of deodorant is just not good enough. Nor is a quick bath enough preparation for the time you will spend with your girl in bed. Take a nice and long hot shower or bath. Don't just clean yourself, cleanse yourself.
The difference between clean and cleanse is what can make or break your appeal and if you really hit it off with your girl, chances are that you both will be exposed to body odors like you never imagined. Practicing good hygiene is not only a solid mood enhancer but will also give you a nice little confidence boost because that will be one less area you will be nervous about.
3) Brush and carry a box of mints or extra strong chewing gum
It sounds silly to ask you to brush before you go meet your lady love and the added advice of having you carry mints with you. However you should know that foul smelling breath is one of the biggest turn offs.
Bad breath is one of the first signs of bad hygiene and can be a nightmare to tolerate, that is if someone kind enough to tolerate in the first place. So do what you need to do to make sure you have an extra zing in your breath.
4) Stop flexing - Your biceps are really not going to matter
While the boys may like to think that the definition of the muscles on their biceps and triceps will woo a girl in bed, but that is hardly the case. Remember, she has agreed to make love with you based on how you behave with her and how you treat her as a loving partner.
Your bicep is just an example and this applies to all the other buffed up muscles that may be a result of the many months you have spend in the gym. So don't fret about pumping up those muscles and giving weird and unnecessary poses while your girl watches you get undressed.
5) Don't overeat or stuff yourself just before
A heavy meal can not only make you feel lethargic, it may even result in unwanted burps or passing air at the wrong time. The latter is probably one of the most embarrassing situations you could be in, especially if it is your first time.
So regardless of how delicious the food is at the restaurant where you and your girlfriend have gone for a date, try not to stuff yourself. Needless to say, avoid garlic, onion or any other foods that give you a perennial bad breath.
6) Don't think about kinky stuff
If you are going to have sex for the first time, kinky stuff and the other exciting moves that your friends have told you about should be the last thing on your mind. Keep all those thoughts aside and leave the kinky ideas for times when you and your girlfriend are more familiar with each other, on a physical and on an emotional level.
7) Don't expect it to be like the steamy stuff you saw in adult videos
The basic assumption of the experience of making love for the first time should not be based upon the hours or days you've spent being glued to porn videos. While you may think that a long haired actor from a porn movie is the ultimate sex god, that's hardly the case in real life.
If you really want to see what making love is all about, try watching a tender love scene from a regular Hollywood blockbuster. You will notice that there is more of emotion and expression, and less of banging, and all the other terms used to describe an apparently perfect sexual experience.
8) Practice safe sex: Always carry protection
While Princesswithapen takes the chance of sounding like a nagging mother, it is important for you to know that if you don't carry protection with you, your few minutes of bliss could turn out to be the biggest mistake of your life.
Under no circumstances should you leave anything up to chance when it comes to protecting yourself and your partner from diseases, infections or pregnancy. Pill or no pill, always wear a condom.
9) Don't over plan it
If you are going to spend days and weeks planning and organizing your first rendezvous with your lady love in bed, that may very well fizzle out the spark. This is not business, it's love. So stay away from nitty gritty planning and use your common sense and intuition to plan your day out. Don't forget to the important things like having a good place and making all the other arrangements for an uninterrupted and blissful time.
10) She is as nervous as you are
It is understandable if you feel nervous because this is your first time in bed. There are three things that you must remember.
- Nervousness is not going to help in any way. In fact, being nervous is only going to make things worse. Although getting rid of the jitters when you are going to have sex for the first time is easier said than done, try to try until you think that your mind has stopped doing hula hoops inside your head.
- She is probably as nervous, if not more, as you are. Just like you are fretting about the whole thing, she is too. So if you can't kiss your nervousness goodbye, so be it. Just don't be nervous about being nervous. Confused? That's okay. You'd rather be confused than nervous.
- Get rid of your inhibitions and be yourself. She likes you for what you are.