ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Gender and Relationships»
  • Advice & Tips for Men in Relationships

A Boys Guide To Understanding Girls

Updated on January 24, 2011

Every girl has felt totally, completely, and utterly confused by a boy at least once in their lives. So im guessing the same goes for men. If you're a guy and need a few quick inside secrets about girls or just a quick behind the scenes look into the mind of a girl, this blog is for you! Here are 10 secrets that every guy should know. Lets get started..


If you are interested in a girl and she tells you that "she's not really looking for a boyfriend or any kind of relationship right now"... forget about it. Every girl wants a boyfriend that she likes no matter what or when or where (unless she's just getting out of a relationship). Girls are never not looking for a boyfriend. If we like you, we do. If not.. we throw this line at you. You can decode it to it's literal meaning: "I would rather just be friends with you because you don't have what I'm looking for in a boyfriend". Girls are never not looking for a boyfriend.. it's like a primal instinct in our genes (although some of us play it off, we all want to find love)


We want you to call, text, ask us out first. We want to be the girl in the relationship and we want you to take charge and be the man. If you want to talk to a girl, text her, call her, do whatever you have to do just don't wait for her to come to you. If she is nice and worth your time, she won't leave you hanging. So you really have nothing to lose, go for it!


Yes, it's true. Women like bad boys. But that doesn't mean we want to be treated badly. We're attracted to adventure, and adreniline, and danger not rudeness. We want a bad boy that treats us nicely.


We really do care about personality.. In the end, every girl wants a boy that treats her nicely and makes her feel special. We just want some attention.. to know that you’re thinking about us. Plan something fun, dates can get kind of mundane. Just put some thought into it. We want to feel cared about. It doesn't have to be expensive, maybe just a blanket, candles, and a bucket of ice cream for a night on the beach. You can melt any girls heart with a date like that.


Be honest. Say what you feel and say what you mean. Show some character! Don’t beat around the bush, don’t lie, don’t hide things, don’t cheat (obviously) and you can earn any girls trust. We just want to know that we can count on you. Trust is an important part of any relationship, and without it you might never be able to even start one. Commitment is big for some girls, and if they feel like they can't trust you.. chances are they won’t commit to you.


We want a best friend in our boyfriend. Meaning we want to be able to have fun with you wether that means hanging out on the couch watching tv, playing video games, going to a movie, going to a movie and it getting sold out, going to the beach, getting caught in the rain at the beach, or trying a kickboxing class for the first time together, we want to know that as long we are with you, we’ll have a good time.



We don’t want you to waste our time. If you like a girl, tell her now. If you don’t, tell her now (but nicely). If you want to see other people, tell her now. If you want to go out with her, ask her now. Don’t think guys are the only ones that can move on fast, most girls can too. If you like a girl, don’t make her wait forever. Take some initiative and make your move, before it’s too late.


If a girl is quiet or pushes you away, it doesn’t mean she doesn’t like you. Quite the opposite actually. She might have the biggest crush on you but she’s too shy or nervous around you to be herself right away. She wants you to make her feel comfortable so that she feels like it’s safe to open up to you. Girls want a guy that’s open and accepting. If you've done everything you can to make her feel comfortable and she still hasn't loosened up, it's a sign to move on.


If you have a big ego, tone it down. It’s hard for a girl to fall for a boy that’s head over heels in love with himself.  No matter how hot, smart, funny, talented, athletic, or charming you are.. be humble.  There is no way around this.


Chivalry is key. If a girl is unsure about a guy, chivalry might be the one thing that can win her over enough to give him a chance. It’s quite simple really. Just bring out the gentleman in you. Hold the door open, tell her she looks pretty when she gets dressed up for you, buy her flowers on Valentine's Day, hold her hand, and kiss her goodnight. Little things like this, a girl will remember forever.

I hope this helped you get a better understanding of what most girls are looking for in a guy and what they really want. Theres always a few exceptions, but these 10 secrets.. I'm almost positive that any girl would agree. Getting your heart broken isn't the end of the world, it's always better to put yourself out there and get hurt than to never say anything and live the rest of your life wondering "what if". If it doesn't work out with a girl, then it just isn't meant to be. What ever is meant to be, will.




    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • profile image

      Lehman 5 months ago

      I luv this article. I'm quite geeky but somehow I attract a lot of attention from girls. I'm tired of hurting their feelings and I felt that I needed to learn more of them.

    • Jay Rando profile image

      Jay Rando 5 years ago from England

      Just wanted to drop by and say this is a fantastic hub, i relate to both guys and women quite easily and their differences through counseling.. and even though i am not a woman its really easy for me to understand everything that a woman wants here even as a guy, i like the fact you blew up the whole bad boy thing by explaining 'bad' as to be playful rather than actually being a bad person which guys always often think is the meaning. Great job :) Voted awesome.

    • kenneth avery profile image

      Kenneth Avery 6 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama

      La Vita, Let me use these adjectives in describing THIS hub:

      1. Great

      2. Fantastic

      3. Outstanding

      4. Amazing

      5. Precise

      You are a Great talent. You have to be God-gifted. I voted up and away on this hub for it's honesty, simplistic way of weeding through the mazes of politically-correctiveness. Great writing style. I wish my grandson would read this. He is shy, but he does like girls a lot. He is 8 and I want HIM to respect ALL women at all costs. And not be run over. That is possible even in 2011. Thank you for sharing. I am now a fan and a follower, if that's okay with you. Sincerely and Respectfully, Kenneth Avery, from a rural town in northwest Alabama, Hamilton, that reminds you of Mayberry, the town that was in the Andy Griffith Show.

    • PR Morgan profile image

      PR Morgan 7 years ago from Sarasota Florida

      Good info!...and hub...up and useful!