ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

How to Select the Right Gift For Your Valentine

Updated on May 6, 2023
MsDora profile image

Ms. Dora writes on moral integrity, especially for women, and encourages appreciation for the men in their lives.

The best gift is what the recipient, not the giver, likes.
The best gift is what the recipient, not the giver, likes. | Source

You may be surprised that although your Valentine's Day gift of candy or flowers is expensive and impressive, it may not communicate love to your partner.

That is because, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, counselor and author of The Five Love Languages, there are different ways to communicate love; and each person has a preferred mode of communication (a love language) in which he or she likes to receive love.

If you choose a gift which does not say “I love you,” in the other person's love language, you could fall short of your desired intent. Selecting the perfect gift for the right person is an art.

What are Love Languages?

Chapman cites five love languages. For our purpose of selecting the perfect gift, we may think of the language as the preferred dialect in which a person wants to hear "I love you." If your gift is presented in any other dialect, the message stands the chance of being lost.

Here are Chapman's five love languages:

(1) Affirmation – words of appreciation or encouragement;
(2) Time – quality time spent together, focusing attention on each other;
(3) Service – acts of kindness which help to make life easier;
(4) Touch – physical show of affection, not necessarily sexual;
(5) Gifts – not necessarily expensive, but obviously from the heart.

The challenge is to identify your partner's love language (yours too). In case you cannot tell simply by conversation and observation, it would be a good idea to acquaint yourselves with the concept of love languages and take the quiz to help you confirm yours and your partner's.

It is a fun activity, and understanding your love languages will empower you to give the most satisfying gifts.

Origin of "Love Languages" (under 2 mins)


“If I had to choose between breathing or loving you, I would say 'I love you' with my last breath." ―Shannon Dermott

For the partner whose love language is affirmation, add that to the box of chocolates. Attach an inscription which gives an assurance of love, which says that the person is valuable.

  • "You're the only one for me."
  • "I would be lost without your love."
  • "With you in my life, everyday is Valentine's."

It will mean even more if the inscription is hand-written. If you do not have the skill to produce the caliber of handwriting you will like to see, an office supply store can transform your sketch into something classy; or go all the way with something personalized from a gift store like PersonalizationMall.Com. Your partner will interpret your gift as genuine love, especially because of the affirmation.



"Spending time with you showed me what I’ve been missing in my life. The more time we spent together, the more I could imagine it lasting in the future." ―Nicholas Sparks

Next to your undivided attention, any other gift you give will be a pale expression of love. So plan on spending quality time, perhaps hosting a dinner for two at home or at your favorite spot, or even take a long leisurely drive to a concert you would both enjoy.

If your relationship is long distance, make short calls while on your journey home to ensure that the loved one is in your thoughts. Remember also that the partner who wants quality time, feels loved when you honor your schedule time for being together. It feels great to know that time spent together takes precedence over time for anything else. Even if the chosen activity is not your first choice, being together will make it worthwhile and your partner will likely reciprocate by letting you choose the next event.


"When you love you wish to do things for. You wish to sacrifice for. You wish to serve."— Ernest Hemingway

If your Valentine interprets acts of service as genuine love, it is because he or she thinks, “If you love me, you’ll help me. It’s as simple as that.”

Choose practical gifts that show your intention to help. Think of ways to show love in action —breakfast in bed or some type of pampering. "Let me do this today while you relax," will sound like a love song. If your present a gift item that requires assembly, include an assembly-help coupon.

Anything that says, “I love to serve you,” will be the perfect gift for your partner.

Cuddling the bear is comforting
Cuddling the bear is comforting | Source


“I was mistaken when I said you live in my heart. How absurd I was when you live in my fingertips so that everything I touch is you." ― Kamand Kojouri

For the person who interprets touch as a symbol of love, choose gifts that are evaluated by how they feel:

  • plush towels
  • woolly socks
  • bubble baths
  • huggable teddy bears

Your Valentine wants to be touched by love whether on his or her face, hands or feet. The need for touch is always a feel for affection, not always for sexual satisfaction. The cute teddy bear is an appropriate gift--to hug, cuddle and squeeze. Even men appreciate them as gifts.

In an ABC report (August 24, 2010) Travelodge decided to follow up on the thousands of stuffed animals left at their hotels. Twenty-five percent of the men they surveyed admitted to taking their bears on business trips. Others said that they found cuddling the bear comforting and helpful in lowering the stress level. My guess is that the love language of these men is touch.


"The best gifts come from the heart, not the store.” ―Sarah Dessen

Generally, everyone likes to receive gifts, but the persons whose love language is “gifts” are serious about what the gift means. For them, flowers and candy are treasures not based on what they cost, or how long they last, but on any gesture which shows that the recipient is special. Did you have to order to get the right one? Did you buy it weeks ago and save it because it was exactly what he or she wanted?

Valentine’s Day is their day. Heart-felt sentiments are the currency of the moment. Deliver early so your partner can enjoy your expression of love all day long.

© 2012 Dora Weithers


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)