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In a Relationship a Man's Loyalty to his Partner is Tested When He's Well to do

Updated on January 23, 2017
Lovers at  Sphinx of Egyptian Pyramid
Lovers at Sphinx of Egyptian Pyramid

Wealth and Loyalty are sometimes incompatible

For those women who follow a man’s pocket rather than his heart, be aware that a rich is more prone to cheating than his poor counterpart. Some women make the mistake of thinking that giving money and gifts regularly and love is one and the same thing. Wealth has many perks: great vacations, beautiful houses and nice cars, which at the same time expose the wealthy men to cheating. If its marital bliss you’re looking for, don’t expect money to help.

Johnson and Caroline dated for six months, before they married. To everyone around them it looked like a union made in heaven. After three years, Johnson made money through a contract he executed for an ICT company. Just when the lovebirds thought they had found it all, an emotional crack surfaced. For three months, Caroline’s heart was on the slaughter slab and it was the most painful part of her life. Just when she thought her life was made, his sweetheart embarked on cheating. Many men abandon their wives after they have made money because they can now afford what it takes to have an affair. In some cases, the women have helped to make them successful, only to been dumped for someone else; someone younger in most cases.

From golf star Tiger Woods to Republican presidential contender Newt Gingrich, cheating seems commonplace among famous and wealthy men. Tiger Woods’ beautiful wife, Elin Nordegren, a former model in Sweden chased him out of the house with a golf club after learning he’d been cheating on her. They had two children — daughter Sam, then 2, and newborn son Charlie . Since 1999, not a year had gone by without him winning at least one golf major championship, and he won 14 majors from 1997 to 2008. In April 2009, he was photographed in the Oval Office meeting President Obama. On Oct. 1, Forbes named him the first athlete to earn $1 billion. Woods was considered the greatest golfer of all time and a uniquely American success story, a multi-ethnic superstar dominating a historically white sport.

The life and career of the world’s greatest golfer fell apart. Woods reportedly confessed to sleeping with 120 women, but sources close to Nordegren say she remained on the fence about leaving him until April 2010, when a 15th mistress was revealed. Her name was Raychel Coudriet. She was a daughter of the couple next door and first met Woods when she was only 14.

The dissolution of the marriage between Christ Embassy Church founder, Pastor Christian Oyakhilome, and his wife, Rev. Anita Odegwa Oyakhilome, has entered the final phase, TheCable can report. Pastor Chris and Anita Oyakhilome are undergoing divorce proceedings.

The wife is seeking divorce on the grounds of “unreasonable behaviour” and “adultery”. Matters got to a head on Sunday, July 13, 2014, when some relatives of Anita locked up the London branch of the church to protest against the “humiliation” being meted out to their sister who had not overseen services at the branch since November 2013. Oyakhilome is regarded as one of the richest and most influential pastors in Nigeria, and co-authors the fast-selling Christian daily devotional, Rhapsody of Realities, with the wife. However, following the strain in the marriage, the wife had been complaining to friends that her husband had stopped the payment of royalties due her from the devotional literature. Efforts to reconcile the popular couple, whose church is one of the biggest denominations in Nigeria and has branches all over world, have failed. They have two teenage daughters, Sharon and Charlyn. Oyakhilome is the president of Believers’ Love World Inc, the registered name of the Christian ministry, while his wife is the vice-president.

Cricket ace 43-year-old Darren Gough is thought to have run out on his wife after striking up a friendship with 23-year-old Essex beauty, Ms. Amy Childs while filming Channel 4 reality series, The Jump. Gough got divorced from his ex-wife Anna in 2002, but the pair rekindled their romance in 2009, until when he left.

So what is really the problem? The crux of the matter is that when some men make money they become more experimental, especially if the sexual relationship at home is lukewarm. They can afford to seek excitement outside the home. It could be heartbreaking when you discover that the one you have a crush on has strayed into the streets. Can you blame him when he has gone to the emotional river and has decided to drink thirstily from the emotional it, due to lack of intimacy at home. Your partner won’t stray as long as you keep your sex life exciting. If you’re in a relationship, spicing up the physical intimacy won’t prevent cheating. Worse, buying into this myth makes the wronged individuals blame themselves for their partner’s infidelity.

Well, it’s only natural for your feelings about your partner to change over the course of the relationship. After a couple of years, infatuation takes a back seat to faithfulness and trust. This is the period, cheating can start if you don’t show enough concern for your partner’s welfare.

Perhaps one of the most tragic misconceptions about cheating is that people stray because they have fallen out of love with their partners. You have been taught to value fidelity as the sign of a relationship and conditioned to feel victimized if someone cheats on you. But research shows that young men don’t cheat because they have fallen out of love with their partners. Rather, they cheat simply because they desire sex with someone else, even if they want to preserve their relationship. The reason cited most frequently is variety. For most people, monogamy does not necessarily provide a lifetime of sexual contentment.

Another reason is that most rich men travel a lot, and sometimes they are sexually aroused there thousands of kilometers away from their wives. Some engage in cheating to nourish their ego. Others have done it for the excitement the risk gives.

This doesn’t mean that he is no longer in love; it just means that your love has matured and you must understand how to deal with this phase of your relationship. Here you need to establish trust on all levels. Mutual trust is founded in respect and loyalty toward each other.

Liz Moyer, Forbes Staff wrote, “Almost half of America’s rich say they’re unhappy in marriage, a study found. What’s worse: More than that says they’ve been unfaithful in the last three years. Depending on whose data you use, statistics on infidelity for the general U.S. population have some stark contrasts. Anywhere from one-quarter to three-fourths of married men admit to having extramarital affairs, compared to a range of 10% to 40% of married women, the reverse of the more narrowly defined wealthy population.”

For you to strike an emotional balance, you need to be emotionally available for your partner. Chris Oyakhilome is in Nigeria and his wife is in London. Being a rich and handsome, he must have been faced with great temptation from women. This is the same problem with the sports men, who are traveling around the world for competitions while their wives are at home. And these are rich men.

You need to be emotionally balanced to go through this phase, because you go through a lot of turmoil and difficulty in your daily life. One big mistake that you might make is to compare your relationship with others. This will never solve any marital problem but actually make things worse. Clinton and Hillary are still married today because of the way she handled the scandal of the relationship between her husband, former President Clinton and Monica Lewinsky in 1998. A typical American woman would have sought for divorce but she stood by her husband. It is therefore pertinent for every couple to make their own love rules, love agreements, love habits, love routines which will guide them through their relationship.

The most important thing is to focus on the things that bind you together; the things that would make the relationship wax stronger as well as how to forge romantically ahead on a daily basis. Pressuring your partner to do something that they really don’t want to do, or neglecting or abusing them (emotionally, verbally, physically, or sexually) hurts your ability to trust and rely on each other. Help your partner to overcome his weaknesses. Sometimes, you make some decisions that are good in the short term but bad in the long run. But there are times when you have tried your best but still he refused to change. You must remain calm and do that which will be to best interest of all concerned, especially if children are involved.

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