A Perspective on Relationships that Survive
One way of Looking at Relationships
Is there a wrong format for a relationship? Heaven forbid! Any relationship that is a relationship is a seed that is as worthy and fit to survive as any other. It is true that some relationships or perspective relationships have higher entrance barriers then others. Each relationship has its problems. That is life. What more can be said?
Unfortunately, a lot more can be said especially when it comes to relationships such as long distance relationships. First, before going into specific problems or ways to overcome them perhaps it would be beneficial to define the point of view and definition of the word relationship that is the foundation and premise of this discussion. Relationships are two-way mutual balancing acts where both partners are trying to work towards goals designed to bring them closer together and towards a unity of purpose, even marriage if it is accomplish-able.
It must be said; therefore, that before one commits one's heart to a love interest that a certain amount of cunning investigation needs to take place. One does well to find out as much about the person of interest up front and do things that might border on stockeresque behavior but only from the standpoint that you should trust everyone and make things up as you go. If someone, some distance from you is expecting you to accept everything in your discourse at face value they are expecting you to shelve your intellect and go on faith.
Do not get me wrong, faith in a relationship is a key component but it is earned not given carelessly. If the person you are interested in is a serious sort and understands that your connection with them is something you want to go deeper then just pen pal level, they will expect you to do your due diligence. If they have a problem with you digging into their past and discussing it with them then they have something to hide that could latter bite you in the behind and becomes a reason to brake off the attachment before too many feelings get hurt.
That being said, long distance relationships can work if both parties are open and honest. Meetings can be sweet and the effort to find a place somewhere in the middle to make it last can be a tremendous experience. The higher the barriers to making it happen the more binding the situation seems to be. The barriers need to be respected, however, and dealt with firs, not last in an analytical search for knowledge that holds no ulterior motive other then to familiarize one’s self with the person you are dealing with over whatever distance.