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A Perspective on Relationships that Survive

Updated on August 21, 2010

One way of Looking at Relationships

Is there a wrong format for a relationship?  Heaven forbid!  Any relationship that is a relationship is a seed that is as worthy and fit to survive as any other.  It is true that some relationships or perspective relationships have higher entrance barriers then others. Each relationship has its problems.  That is life.  What more can be said?

Unfortunately, a lot more can be said especially when it comes to relationships such as long distance relationships.  First, before going into specific problems or ways to overcome them perhaps it would be beneficial to define the point of view and definition of the word relationship that is the foundation and premise of this discussion.  Relationships are two-way mutual balancing acts where both partners are trying to work towards goals designed to bring them closer together and towards a unity of purpose, even marriage if it is accomplish-able. 

It must be said; therefore, that before one commits one's heart to a love interest that a certain amount of cunning investigation needs to take place.  One does well to find out as much about the person of interest up front and do things that might border on stockeresque behavior but only from the standpoint that you should trust everyone and make things up as you go.  If someone, some distance from you is expecting you to accept everything in your discourse at face value they are expecting you to shelve your intellect and go on faith. 

Do not get me wrong, faith in a relationship is a key component but it is earned not given carelessly.  If the person you are interested in is a serious sort and understands that your connection with them is something you want to go deeper then just pen pal level, they will expect you to do your due diligence.  If they have a problem with you digging into their past and discussing it with them then they have something to hide that could latter bite you in the behind and becomes a reason to brake off the attachment before too many feelings get hurt.

That being said, long distance relationships can work if both parties are open and honest.  Meetings can be sweet and the effort to find a place somewhere in the middle to make it last can be a tremendous experience.  The higher the barriers to making it happen the more binding the situation seems to be.  The barriers need to be respected, however, and dealt with firs, not last in an analytical search for knowledge that holds no ulterior motive other then to familiarize one’s self with the person you are dealing with over whatever distance. 

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    • Jaggedfrost profile imageAUTHOR

      Jaggedfrost 

      8 years ago

      It is a shame that people demand satisfaction without thoughts of giving the same. Fortunately if one is clever I think that this is a trait that can be screened for so long as the person doing the screening is willing to give as good as they take.

    • Money Glitch profile image

      Money Glitch 

      8 years ago from Texas

      "Relationships are two-way mutual balancing acts where both partners are trying to work towards goals designed to bring them closer," I think this is what many people fail to realize that there should be a mutual balancing act. Many people are just in a relationship for what they think it will do for themselves not the other person. Thumbs up! :)

    • Jaggedfrost profile imageAUTHOR

      Jaggedfrost 

      8 years ago

      I suppose it could as it has for me though i have to admit that it required mutual unselfishness. That in the young is often hard to come by.

    • Sky321 profile image

      Sky321 

      8 years ago from Canada

      No, I haven't I imagine it would be hard but probably workable. I think it might make a relationship stronger in the long run.

    • Jaggedfrost profile imageAUTHOR

      Jaggedfrost 

      8 years ago

      Have you had any experiences with long distance relationships and if so what did or didn't work?

    • Sky321 profile image

      Sky321 

      8 years ago from Canada

      Awe...So sweet!

    • Jaggedfrost profile imageAUTHOR

      Jaggedfrost 

      8 years ago

      I appreciate your appreciation. My marriage might be said to have grown from a long distance relationship. My wife grew up in a town twenty miles away from where I grew up. The only together time we had originally was when we met and found time to talk in the same worship building. The hoops we had to jump through to make it come together has made for interesting learning experiences and food for several of my hubs.

    • Sky321 profile image

      Sky321 

      8 years ago from Canada

      Another good hub!Faith is a good foundation for a relationship. Of course, there are still problems sometimes. I like you style of writing.

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