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Advice After a Broken Relationship

Updated on October 31, 2016

An intimate relationship is tantamount to algebra which has many variables to ruminate. Communication and the proper distance are just a few of the many variables that are associated with the success of it. Like in Algebra, we have no idea if the one we have right now is the right one for us –in other words, it is a trial and error process. Moreover, clinging to a sunken relationship does not commemorate love but rather being a martyr on your own making. Love is not a healer of a hopeless affair but an eye opener that there is someone better to come. Always remember that at the end of every relationship this will not definitely be the end of everything, it is just a reminder that the one you have right now is just part of your growing up or the road to maturity with respect to loving someone or being in a relationship. Let go and do not be afraid to face the future because you cannot live always in the past and that is the fact that you have to face. Though pain may reside in you temporarily but it will just pass away. Just like when a storm comes, it does not mean to stay rather it moves away for the sun to shine. Life is like that and so it is with love, there are moments when we caught ourselves in the storm but know that it shall not be forever that way for there will be a time also that we will drench ourselves in the heat of the sun.

For every broken relationship brings forth pain. Pain that can be devastating at times when not handled correctly, some may result in a demise or death and others may abuse their health in the hope that their ex will notice them. But there are better ways than this, no matter how many times you make yourself suffer but the truth is that there is a slim chance that the love that is not meant for you will stay.

There is More to Life than This

When a relationship stops, the world still continues to turn. Your life does not end along with the relationship rather it evolves into a more mature state. Just like a caterpillar undergoing a metamorphosis we should also learn how to change ourselves so that at the end of it all we shall fly away from the pain that we are facing. Lift your spirit up, the world is yours. Letting go is just the beginning of the process. Realizing and accepting the fact that your world does not revolve around a single person will end the cycle of pain and thus morph you into a better person with a newfound knowledge of love. Explore the world and do all the activities that you have not done when you are in a relationship. Do things that you weren't able to do before like hanging out with old time friends, trekking the countryside, going to the mall alone or with some friends or relatives, wearing accessories that have been prohibited by you to wear during the course of being in a relationship. Just savor the state of what being single is all about. Live like a free soul and liberate yourself as if nothing will stop you. Sometimes it is good to abused things that we have lost for the longest time, right?

“Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.”

― Dr. Seuss

These Things Shall Pass Away

I remember a story during my grade school years which was about an optimistic king who had a ring. On his ring was in scripted a phrase “these things shall pass away”. Every time the king experiences hardships, he would then read the phrase on his ring and be reminded always that these things happen but it will pass away. His greatest fight was when he was badly wounded during one of the battles with his enemies, the wounds were so painful that he could not endure the pain inflicted by it. Instead of taking suicide or just succumb to its death, the king wounded and exhausted, fight for his dear life by just taking the meaning on what the phrase on his ring was “THESE THINGS SHALL PASS AWAY”. The story ended with the king surviving his ordeal.

I guess it is just human nature that when we are beleaguered by problems we tend to forget the real essence of such problems especially if it’s the heart that has been attacked by it. When we are hit heart centered, all collapses along with all the rational things. During heart aches we are not really hurt, we just tend to forget. We tend to forget the phrases of our lives to keep us going, we obliviously deny all things that will propel us to the right place. Though it is really true that the pain is non-comparable but I guess just like the king we must hold on and be inspired to continue to move on as these things shall pass away.

We must accept finite disappointment but never lose infinite hope.

― Martin Luther King, Jr.

If You Stay- Joseph Vincent

Sometimes being talkative is good

Communication is a process of imparting or interchanging of thoughts, opinions, or information through speech, writings, or signs. Communication is a very important tool in all aspects of life, without it the world will be in bedlam. In military operations, communication gap could mean everything and at worst a loss of life. A single misinformed intelligence report can destroy the whole operation and endanger its operatives. Even in business or engineering field, communication gap could mean a loss of contracts, profits or penalties.

With respect to a broken relationship, communication plays an important role. It may be said that communication is one of the factors involves for a better intimate relationship, It can also be a factor for a better healing. Through talking with another individual, writing, or just a simple status change on your Facebook account you are already communicating and along with it is expressing all the negative aura that is beholding you.

When the pain inside is aching let it all out by means of talking to other people about it. Communication is the key and it is free and easy to do especially if you have plenty of reliable people out there who cares for you. The pain will surely subside if you have someone intelligent enough on your side to listen how you feel about it and gives you a tap on your back along with the line that “it is Okay”.

You can also express your thoughts by way of writing in any form as long as you let it all out. Writing helps ease the pain out just like talking. There are many means to express your negativity just utilize it to your advantage instead of being silent and be devoured by this ordeal that is in front of you. No one can help yourself but you, always remember that.

You can talk with someone for years, every day, and still, it won't mean as much as what you can have when you sit in front of someone, not saying a word, yet you feel that person with your heart, you feel like you have known the person for forever.... connections are made with the heart, not the tongue.”

― C. JoyBell C.

This is a song for the broken hearted


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    • seajon profile image

      Jon 5 years ago from Philippines

      Thanks momster, much appreciated. =)

    • momster profile image

      momster 5 years ago

      Great hub. Very excellent way to see love as complicated as algebra having so many variables. Never even thought of it that way. Good advise for others. I like your story of the king. Voted up and shared.