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After 30 years, I found my long lost love.......

Updated on January 7, 2010

If you miss him, find him

 After going through one bad marriage and existing in another, I decided one night as my husband lay snoring on the couch to look up my first love of 30 years ago. I signed on to reunions.com and nervously typed in his name. It took me a while to click the enter button but I said to myself  "what is the worst that can happen? He can respond and want nothing to do with me or it can go the other way" so I did. I received so many hits to this unusal name but I did not respond to any of them. It just didn't feel right or honestly, I got nervous about it so I cancelled my subscription. About a week later, I received another hit with a picture. Remember, this was 30 years ago but somehow, I knew it was him. So I took the plunge and responded to him. I gave him alittle background of when we dated and loe and behold, he responded back and he remembered me. We started e-mailing each other everyday. He had a girlfriend and I had not yet filed for divorce. We started an online chat almost every night. Then one night he sent me his phone number and the very next day, we talked. It was as if I was a teenager again when I heard his voice. Then we talked every day still talking about our relationships. We live in different states so this wasn't going to be easy I thought to myself. I filed for divorce and three months later, I went to see him and spent a weekend with him. Our previous relationships disolved and things have been better than ever between the two of us. We are now talking about our lives together. I never gave up on him. So girls, if there is someone out there that you miss terribly, please, take the plunge and find him. The internet is a powerful tool and can create wonderful things. Life is too short to wonder.... what if? 

 

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      Jarod 14 months ago

      I first read your story while I was in a very difficult marriage. My wife and I have been separated for six months. It was a terribly difficult time for me. Leaving my wife, who I had been involved with since I was a teenager, was the hardest thing I have ever had to do.

      Before I got married I had fallen in love with another friend of mine. We both wanted to be together, and my other friends told me she wanted to be with me. I was just nervous to walk away from my long time girlfriend.

      Instead of being proactive, I let my girlfriend pressure me into marriage. It was a very trying moment. Did I choose the woman I love or the woman that had been with me since I was a teen?

      I went the safe route in life considering I loved my girlfriend. All the doubts I had about our marriage were soon realized. I didn't give our marriage a trial period. We were together for nearly 3 years.

      It became progressively worse over time. She threatened to leave me. It was like all those fears I had came rushing back. I suddenly remembered that I had been in love with another woman.

      I started to reach out to this other woman, to rekindle our friendship. She was kind enough to respond. I was torn, I had loved this woman, and she loved me too.

      After I left my wife I took my hand at trying to speak to her in person. It didn't go so well. She had a boyfriend, and she immediately started dishing about their relationship. We had not spoken to each other in two years. It seemed rather personal a conversation to be having with her.

      I told her to examine her personal life and see what happened. She stopped dating the guy after some time. Then I figured I would ask my former love to have lunch with me. She flat denied me.

      Of course, I understood, my marital status is still separated. However she told me she didn't feel comfortable meeting me considering the situation I was in. After that point, I stopped trying to communicate with her. She never responded, but I know deep down she read every time I messaged her.

      I personally feel it reflected in her facebook posts. She finally asked for some relationship advice on facebook, and I answered her question. Not even a day later, she says that she is going to give the ex boyfriend another try.

      I don't find it coincidental that after I spoke to her, she stopped seeing him, and then subsequently started seeing him again after I offered my advice. My advice was helpful, not harmful. I personally believe I would see a different side of her if I was fully divorced and available.

      I want to thank MickTheTek for her wonderful advice to me over this troubling time in my life. I had never been so weak willed than when I reached out to you. You gave me the courage to choose me, instead of my selfish wife. You saved a life Mick, in me.

      I am happier today than I have been in years. I am still sad that things haven't worked out between my wife and I. I really wanted things to work out, but I just can't force myself to endure any more conditions. I loved my wife unconditionally.

      I am proud of myself for having never treated her like garbage when she treated me so badly. I can only hope that my true love will give me another chance when I become available again. I look forward to the day I post that true love prevailed.

      If you are going through a hard time, have trust in life. We are all in this together. Life isn't so perfect for everyone.

      True love is absolutely worth waiting for, even if you are the last in line. I have waited patiently for seven years to date the woman I love. I think I will get my chance when I become single again.

      She knew what we had was real. I am so glad I told her that I would always love her, no matter what happened between us. She knows that I still love her. For now, that is enough for me.

      I know where she stands regarding me, and she knows where I stand. Hard to ask for much more than that. Thanks again Mick, you are an inspiration.

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      Jenny 16 months ago

      Think this page is finished! Sorry to see it go!

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      Browneyedmaiden 16 months ago

      He didn't come back. I was so heartbroken, I could not understand why he didn't at least tell me goodbye. 6 month later, I force myself to move on because he doesn't love me. If he did, he would not have disappeared. I marry the man I met after him. My sister moved into my old apartment and a year later, she tells me he came looking for me. Inside, I'm so upset because I don't understand why he disappeared and why he came back. I tell myself that I've moved on and I try to forget him. But of course, I can't because he is the love of my life. My marriage ends 5 years before we finally divorce.

      I reach out to him around his 40th birthday (1999). I still love him so much and I needed closure. I needed to understand what happened. He calls me but catches me off guard, so I don't ask the whys and he doesn't volunteer anything. I wanted so much to see him but I know it is wrong of me to ask this of him, so I didn't say anything (he is married to the same girl he lived with all those years). I wanted him to be happy. I finally realize that I will never meet anyone else that makes me feel the way he makes me feel.

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      Browneyedmaiden 16 months ago

      We went our separate ways but I never stopped loving him. I reached out a lot but he held me at arms length. Then 13 years later I ran into him at a bar. We were happy to see each other. I invited him over to my place and he accepted. He had been living with a girl for several years. We started talking and all I could say is that I would really want to kiss you. So we did and I was in heaven.

      Later the next day, we went swimming in a secluded area and then he took me to a drive in movie. We couldn't keep our hands off each other. I finally told him I still loved him and he said he loved me too. We went back to my place and made love all night. It was perfect and I thought it meant he had forgiven me and was willing to give us another chance. But that was not to be.

      He came over 2 days later, a friend of mine was at my place. I was happy to see him but he seemed distracted and didn't stay long. In hindsight I he may have wanted to tell me something but I don't know what for certain.

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      Browneyedmaiden 16 months ago

      My FL and I began when we were 13 (1972) and were together for 1 1/2 years. We both were crazy about each other from day one. Soon after we met, he gave me a 2 diamond promise ring and asked me to be his. I was so happy, I loved him with every fiber of my being. I gave him my virginity a year later. He never, ever pressured me even though we made out amd heavily petted as often as we were together. We lived in the same town but went to different schools. We had so many good times and I knew his family well. In 9th grade, I felt him pulling away and had fear of him breaking up with me. I just couldn't let hi. Break up with me so I did it first.

      He was so hurt and the walls went up around his heart immediately. I thought I lost him forever.

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      Keana Ervin 17 months ago

      I got my first love back after 30 years and neither of us were ever married. Now were engaged to be married. I never gave up on him and he never gave up on me. I agree that if you have someone that you truly love and they complete you don't let them get away. True Love is hard to find.

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      Jenny 19 months ago

      I haven't been on here for a long time. We are still not friends pm fab but he was on my page because on one of my pages I had stated that the pm was the only one for me and he commented absolutely.. So of course I am wondering about a hidden meaning. Then a few month later I look on his page and wee he is a papa so I congratulated him and he responded. So we hadn2 paragraphs of back and forth and then I left. He went down east to visit his daughter and son in law after they had the first grand baby but in all of the pics of the family they're were none of him and his wife together or even with the 2 of them and the baby! SHE still puts her status as single and he puts his as married. But is that not strange the of all these pics none of them together and none of them posted in any of the family pics. Pls give me your opinion.

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      mickthetech 20 months ago

      Hi Drew.

      So happy for you. Once in a while I communicate with my ex and still can't understand why I stayed so long but it was a weight lifting off my shoulders when I finally ended it. No more blood pressure pills. That says something. Now you can move on with your life and start living.

      Keep me posted.

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      Drew 20 months ago

      Hello Mick,

      I am a previous poster here. It appears to have been a year and a half since I last posted in your forum. It was funny coming back to read your advice and more importantly what I previously wrote you.

      I just reread your original advice to me and it is even more sound today than it was before today.

      I finally told my wife two days ago that our marriage was over and I am going to be leaving very soon. It has been a 14 year relationship, but a complete lie. Our love was over a long time ago. It shouldn't have gone into marriage.

      I cant say thank you enough. I finally feel that this is almost over. My wife reaffirmed to me last night she doesnt give a damn about what I want and only thinks of herself and her demands. It is not love, but control and manipulation.

      I guess you were the first person I really reached out to for help. Being in such a complicated unhappy situation, leaving just didnt seem like poetic justice. I needed her to know that she has been the most awful person to me, and that I have ample reason to exit stage left.

      I consider this relationship to be an abusive one. It will be great when it is finally all over. I have slowly been letting my wounds heal and withdrawing from the marriage in my head and heart. This lie we have been living seems to finally be over. I want you to know another unhappy marriage is coming to a close so another happy one can begin.

      Thanks again for your honesty. If I have an update on my progress in the future I will share it with you.

      Drew

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      nn 20 months ago

      The something happen to me I had a boyfriend I hs. We dated for a while I broke up with him. We talked throughout hs. After hs We lost touch so last July I looked on fb n there he was I thought well I'll message him n if responses good if not oh well. He did right away . it was wonderful we chatted a while. A few weeks later we chatted again I asked him if I could take him for a business lunch my outside sakes guy n I did. Well not 5 mins after I got back into my office he texted me. We had lunch a few days later. He wanted to meet me the next day I was scared . we both were married.but we did meet for lunch n drinks m then he asked me to meet him in a sat n I did. He asked if I would let him kiss me. I wanted him so bad. Mind u we never had sex when we we're in hs. We kissed omg. I remember how he was a beautiful kisser . he took my breath away. Then n still. Well after that we talked all day long n started our affair. I fell in love with him right away. I knew it was wrong but I couldn't help myself. So we went on for a year and half . I left my husband because of my quilt 3 months after. Well we had some issues these last months . we are trying to just be friends. I. Having a hard time n he is also but he is married n I still spend time with my husband . we aren't living together but we have kids n grandkids it's so hard. I love them both . however I love my bf lover more then life it self . I can't let him go. N he can't either . I want to be with him but Its so hard with our lives. He is a wonderful man n love him like I said. N the other day I said it's not fair George not his real name . I had you first before your wife . what can we do? So I say if u find your true love hold him or her. I pray we will be together . my heart hurts so bad for him my first n last love.. 1982

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      Brandnewagai 23 months ago

      Life has become very difficult. Rick wants nothing to do with me, but I am still deeply in love with him. He doesn't want to leave his wife, which I'm ok with, but he doesn't want to see me or talk to me either. I am friends with his brother, and he tells me that Rick is still very unhappy in his marriage and that he doesn't hate me, he just can't afford a divorce. I'm so heartbroken.

      I have filed for divorce, even though my husband doesn't know about Rick. I don't love him anymore, and I can't take his tight reign anymore, plus he has been managing 100% of my very good salary, and would only allow me to have very little money. I am at least blessed. My husband and I are good friends and the divorce is amicable, and we are not fighting. That helps a lot.

      I belong to a very conservative church, which I love. I had to go to my minister and confess my sin to him, so I can be forgiven of it. He said in order for me to be truly forgiven of my sins with Rick, I have to confess to my husband, even though we are divorcing. I will be ex-communicated if I don't do this. I don't want to tell him, because he will never forgive me and it will tear my kids apart if we can't spend family time together, even though all my kids are adults now.

      Take my advice, before you have an extramarital affair, give it a lot of thought. Weigh your options. Even though it did not work out with Rick, I don't regret it. It was one of the best experiences of m life, and I would do it again.

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      jslow 23 months ago

      You girls need to write a fiction book. Your sure as hell messing up my mind, and I've waited 50 years.

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      Sharon.hubcaps.com 2 years ago

      Well I'm so glad I came across this site My story is I was with the love of my life for 8 years ( married for 2). I left because I really didn't think he was as committed as I was and there was a lot of interference from so called friends one of whom wanted him for herself. She made out after I had left that he had moved on with someone else even making me believe that this woman had moved into our home. This left me feeling devastated and I actually even seen them together at a mutual friends house one night. But this was all part of this girls plan to make me think he had gotten serious with this woman because she wanted him herself even though she was married to my ex's best friend. 2years later I met someone I started seeing and fell pregnant 4months later. I wasn't in love with this person and he had a real drinking problem. I went on to have 2 more kids but never was happy and I hadn't seen my ex in all this time although I knew he was heartbroken for years after I left. Well 6 months ago I was at a gathering and in he walked and boom my legs went weak and he was just as gorgeous as I remembered 24 years ago. He came and hugged me and told me how great I still looked and we ended up chatting for a couple of hours until my taxi arrived. He didn't want me to go but because I was with others I had no choice. I found out he was married to a thai and had a son and met her in a bar but of course she was a "good" one. He has invested all his money over there building her a house and whatever which he could never own. I think there is a 20 year age gap there. I managed to find his number and I sent him a text telling him how sorry I was for leaving the marriage and that there were things he needed to know about why I left. He replied and said that I shouldn't be sorry and that he should have paid more attention to our marriage and that he always thinks about me. We did maintain a bit of contact over the next few months but not much. He kept saying he wanted to catch up but nothing came of it and I found out he was still here and he hadn't gone back to Thailand and was staying at his folks as his dad was very sick. He does work away also while he's been here but I thought he was flying back to Thailand after his swings on the mines was finished and he had his week off. So then I contacted him a few weeks ago and we chatted for a few hours and he was telling me he hadn't been back home to Thailand for 5 months and he should go back. I found this strange because even though his dad was unwell he wasn't that bad a couple months ago that he couldn't have left to fly back to Thsiland to see this wife. Or why she couldn't have flown over here for a couple of weeks. Then we sent a couple of texts to each other and he said in them he should have listened to me and that he was an idiot and was remembering our wonderful sex life we had and even the blue bikinis he used to love me in. It made my heart break because I just love him so much and I love that he signs off with the love word. So sadly his dad passed away and he said for me to go to the funeral which was sad but I'm glad I went. We hugged and I seen his family and they were all warm to me but his thai wife never came over for it. So when it finished some our mutual friends were going for a drink and he really wanted to go but thought his mum wanted to go straight home so I thought oh god I probably won't see him again and felt heartbroken but when I ended up at the place for drinks he was there. I didn't get to talk to him much but he gave me a hug and he said in passing to everyone he would catch up with them and then gave me this special look as if the comment was directed at me. Then about an hour later he rang and I didn't here my phone but seen the missed call message and he was saying he rang to thank me for coming to the funeral as he thought he hadn't thanked me and so I rang him and we talked for about an hour and he told me he was back up to his swing on the mines for 2 weeks and then would be back to his mums to fix things up a bit at her house. Now he told other people he was going back to Thailand for that week off and that confused me. He knows I'm in the process of moving to live with my brother who he gets along with really well and he said he will contact him and catch up for a drink. I said well if I'm around I can drop you's off and pick you's up and he said no way you will be coming with us. So after our phone conversation I sent him a text and told him how gorgeous he still was and he sent one back telling me I was too. I'm pretty sure he hasnt lost his love for me I know the last 3 months have been busy for him but at least now when I text he answers and if I have called he answers as well. I truly don't believe his marriage is working too well he hasn't been back for 6 months although he is always saying I need to go home and says he will go back and live there and it must be hard because he dies have the little boy but this marriage I believe is a case of him being the money man who can provide the lifestyle that these people would never otherwise be able to afford. I would like to get peoples thoughts on this as I love this man with my heart and soul and I have done for 32 years and can't and never have live anyone else like him. I guess it will be very hard for him if his marriage is not happy because he stands to lose his life savings and also she wouldn't have the son here she wanted him born in Thailand and if he hadn't of married her after he was born he wouldn't have even been allowed to be registered under my ex's name. I don't want to stop contact with him and I'm so scared that if he does do back over there I won't be able to freely text and ring him. I just know there is the love and attraction still there and I don't want any chance to slip by

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      mickthetech 2 years ago

      I understand how you feel. I too felt too guilty to leave my mother and family and they were making me feel even more guilty. I too was seeing a therapist and told me I am not responsible for their happiness. They are and that I am only responsible for mine. At that I decided to leave. And there were alot of hurt feelings. My mother wouldn't even talk to me but I still called her everyday and now, they all love my sweetie and they know I made the right move. It all came in time. What I am saying is that I do not want to be the reason you leave your family, I am merely telling you how I felt and did. I miss my family terribly and try to see them once a year but I love my life now.

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      Naomi 2 years ago

      I met my first love in 1971. We were involved for 3 years, 3 glorious years of joy. Life moved on.....we were young....I had to attend college, as did he. We lived in different countries, but spent 4 wonderful years together that are unforgettable. I retained all the pictures and love letters from that time.

      After a personal health situation and the advice of my psychologist, who told me it was time to go to my happy place. I am sure she thought it would be the mountains of the beach. It has been my favorite place for many years. I still have family and friend here and had some unfinished business. I needed to see him. I wanted to know how his life had been, etc. Before we both knew it, we were holding hands...the chemistry was still there. Before I know it, we were back where we left off, l but wiser and knowlegable of our circumstances. That was 3-1/2 years ago. I do the legal return back and forth every 3 months and attempting citizenship through juris sagrus....more than 2 years now. But it ain't over until the fat lady sings. The thought of hurting my family...children, father...is making me feel very guilty. I know they will be angry and disappointed with me. But at my therapist has told me, I deserve to be happy with the life I have remaining. When we are together, I am truly happy.

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      mickthetech 2 years ago

      I keep reporting them as spam and deleting them but they keep posting here. I agree with you jjhilton.

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      jjhilton 2 years ago

      Omg, if you need a spell caster thats not love. True love is what you read about on this page just like the love of my life and myself. I wish these things would stop showing up

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      Brandnewme 2 years ago

      Hi Mickthetech, I wrote a lengthy continuance of my story a couple days ago, but I don't see it posted here. Could you post it please? Thank you.

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      Brandnewme 2 years ago

      Well, IA lot of time has passed since I last posted, about 4 months at least. My lover and I had been having a pretty steamy love affair. We had been meeting about everybweek andbeven spent the night together in a hotel room, unbeknownst tto our spiuses. I hate it, but I have fallen very deeply in love with him. But all things must comevto an end. We were consantly texting each other, and one day aboutva month ago, his wife got ahold of his phone, without him knowing. She read some of our steamy messages to each other and went nuts! He left homevand moved in with his dad and his brother and told me that continuing our relationship and divorcing would be a financial diaster for him. He doesnt have much saved for retirement, but his house is woth a half million dollars and it's almost paid off. He said when she talked about "her lawyer", he thought she was bluffing and that we couldnt meet for awhile but we could still talk on the phone. I was devestated. I asked him why he delete the text messages like he constantly reminded me too, and he said he got comfortable and lazy. I asked him if he really wanted to get caught. He said he didnt mean to. More later...

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      lina 2 years ago

      I met him in 1974 were so into each other to the point his mother thought that we should get married we were 12 when we met by the time we were sixteen his mom contacted my mother but my mom refused to sign the paperwork we loved each other so much but then again we were so young and didn't even realize what it was. One night were sitting at the fireplace at his house and we broke up and that was in 1983 we both cried and didn't really know why he was tearing because he was the one who wanted to part so that morning I took my stuff and tip toed outta there heartbroken about a month later he contacted me wanting to get together and that went on every weekend for about a year before it stopped. I didn't see him again for a year I ran into him on the street and we both were in a relationship but passing by each other for that moment we couldn't stop looking back at one another while walking with the new boyfriend /girlfriend . In 1986 I got married to someone and maybe it was to fill the void, I still loved him so that marriage didn't work out. In 1995 I married for the second time to an amazing man but it still doesn't compare to the love I had for my first love. One day I happened to be on facebook and I came across his brothers page so to my surprise he remembered me right away so I asked about his family trying to refrain from asking about him out of blue he sent me his number, I was too afraid to call so I text him two weeks later, didn't want to lead on to who I was right away so I gave him a hint by saying a sentence using a name that only him and I knew about it was a nickname for his cat which was big face. We texted for three months he lives in Virginia and iam in Florida after a while we just wanted to see each other badly. So we hooked up went to a restaurant and started reminiscing and he said that he had made the biggest mistake in his life and every relationship he had didn't last because it was not me. He had even gotten married and his wife couldn't take the pressures of his family asking for me he said he looked for me but I was gone. We still are in contact and I still love him but I love my husband of 20 years..Any advice anyone?

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      lina 2 years ago

      I met him in 1974 were so into each other to the point his mother thought that we should get married we were 12 when we met by the time we were sixteen his mom contacted my mother but my mom refused to sign the paperwork we loved each other so much but then again we were so young and didn't even realize what it was. One night were sitting at the fireplace at his house and we broke up and that was in 1983 we both cried and didn't really know why he was tearing because he was the one who wanted to part so that morning I took my stuff and tip toed outta there heartbroken about a month later he contacted me wanting to get together and that went on every weekend for about a year before it stopped. I didn't see him again for a year I ran into him on the street and we both were in a relationship but passing by each other for that moment we couldn't stop looking back at one another while walking with the new boyfriend /girlfriend . In 1986 I got married to someone and maybe it was to fill the void, I still loved him so that marriage didn't work out. In 1995 I married for the second time to an amazing man but it still doesn't compare to the love I had for my first love. One day I happened to be on facebook and I came across his brothers page so to my surprise he remembered me right away so I asked about his family trying to refrain from asking about him out of blue he sent me his number, I was too afraid to call so I text him two weeks later, didn't want to lead on to who I was right away so I gave him a hint by saying a sentence using a name that only him and I knew about it was a nickname for his cat which was big face. We texted for three months he lives in Virginia and iam in Florida after a while we just wanted to see each other badly. So we hooked up went to a restaurant and started reminiscing and he said that he had made the biggest mistake in his life and every relationship he had didn't last because it was not me. He had even gotten married and his wife couldn't take the pressures of his family asking for me he said he looked for me but I was gone. We still are in contact and I still love him but I love my husband of 20 years..Any advice anyone?

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      Jenny 2 years ago

      I'm still in limbo...he did accept a friend request from an old friend from the past...but nothing for me yet. So I know he is on...just laying low. Wondering why he doesn't just delete me and let it be. One person said cause he is interested...just not out of his other relationship even though she has posted her status as single for over a year now. Any thoughts as to why if he isn't interested just delete me?

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      brandnewagain 2 years ago

      He and I have also been communicating every day, and we have now met 4 times! I don't know if this is love yet, but I am extremely fond of him! I don't have any plans to separate from my husband. It's too early to even think about that. It's amazing, that even after 35 years, old feelings come to surface to quickly and easily! Good luck, Molly!!

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      Molly 2 years ago

      We knew each other when I was 15, then I left to attend boarding sch in a the UK. He came to UK a year later and we dated for a year. Then he dated other girls n we lost contact with each other. 40 years later in 2013, I received a Facebook friend request from him and he phoned me the next day. We lived in opp sides of the world. ( I live in Singapore). We communicated daily . I was still married and he was in a bad marriage. I decided to file for a divorce n went to meet him in London. Last year, he retired early and separated from his wife and came back to his hometown , Malaysia. We see each other for as long as the visitor visa allows us. We will live together once my divorce is finalised ( next week is the final judgement ) . We still loved each other after 40 years apart. Yes , it can work .

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      brandnewagain 2 years ago

      I found this site, because I wanted to find people who are experiencing or have experienced what I've been for the last two months. This is not about my FL, but I was only 18, and Rick was 28. He was divorced after a brief marriage of only 1 year and Jewish. I was devoutly Catholic, sheltered and still living with my parents. I had just been dumped from a one-year, very intense relationship (although not sexual), and my heart was breaking. Even in the year that I was going with Brendan, I was enamored by Rick. He was a Federal agent and I was the group's admin. So when Brendan let me go, I figured, "What do I have to lose?" I asked Rick to take me out. Well, he was a little nervous about doing that, because I was so young, and rather inexperienced in relationships.

      One day, my boss had a picnic at his home. Two other co-workers, which were my good friends took me with them to the picnic. Rick came in his own car, which by the way, was a beautiful sports car! Rick and I were friendly with each other, but I had no reason to think he was even remotely interested in me. Somehow, we ended up alone in my boss' basement. There was a dark room down there, and Rick led me into that room. We danced a slow dance, but he did not try anything inappropriate with me. He just held me close. A little while later, my friends told me that Rick was going to take me home. I thought that was kind of strange, because Rick did not ask me first and didn't give me the impression he wanted to do that. But it made me happy that I was going to get to spend some alone time with him, so I agreed to let him take me home.

      After a few minutes at my home, Rick asked me if he could take me back to his parents' house (where he was living). I knew why he wanted to do that, but I went ahead and said yes anyway.

      It was after 10:30 p.m. on a Saturday night by the time we got to his parents' house, and Rick flipped on the t.v. We decided to watch SNL together. Rick has a really great sense of humor, as do I. I love to laugh and to make people laugh. We laid on the couch together, spooning, watching the show and we were laughing ourselves into oblivion. The next thing I knew, he was caressing my right shoulder and my arm, and I felt a strong urge to turn toward him. We ended up making out very passionately, and before I knew it, my blouse was off and we were necking very heavily. It was almost as if we had all this pent-up sexual tension, and it just felt so good to let it out.

      For the first time in my young life, I made love with a man I barely knew right there on the couch. I had had two other serious boyfriends before and made them wait months to have me. With Rick, it was more like hours, even though we knew each other from working together for about a year. Surprisingly, we made love a second time that night, and I did not get home until about 4 the next morning. I could not believe what I had done! I was really worried that I had made a mistake, but it was too late, and I didn't feel one bit guilty.

      Rick called me the next day and we made plans to spend more time together. He made me promise not to tell anyone at work about our affair. I was stupid and did tell one of my friends. I figured she knew anyway, because she was the one that had brought me to my boss' picnic and knew I had left with Rick.

      Well, after about 3 months, and a few more secret rendezvous' with Rick, he decided I was getting too serious and broke it off with me. My heart was broken. I really liked him a lot, and I loved sex with him, because he was the first man to please me in bed or to even care about it. But I couldn't really say I was in love with him. The truth was we didn't know each other very well, and we were very different from each other and came from two different worlds. Our backgrounds couldn't have been more different.

      Three months later, I transferred from that Federal agency to another one, mainly so I could get away from seeing Rick every day. My heart was really broken. In the meantime, I dated about five other people. One of the guys I dated, Dave, was crazy in love with me, and had been since I was 14 years old. He was a very good man and always put me first. I knew that he would make a wonderful husband and father, so we became engaged. Three years later, Dave and I were married and in 4 short years, we had 3 children. I thought of Rick throughout my marriage and life, but I made no attempts to contact him or to keep tabs on him. Frankly, I had put him behind me and didn't think I would ever see him again. I felt that he was bad for me, because shortly after we broke up, I found out my so-called friend (the one I told about our affair) was going out with him every single Saturday night. So he was seeing both of us (sleeping with me, but not her), and made his choice -- her. Later, I found out that because he could not make a commitment to her, she left him and married another man.

      Now it is 35 years later, and I have thought about Rick off and on for years. He has a very common name, so I had trouble finding him on FB but two months ago, I hit gold, and found him. I sent him a friend request, and he accepted my request in about four hours.

      After he accepted my request, I sent him a private message, just telling him that I had thought about him off and on over the years and hoped that he was happy and that he was able to find someone to share hiss life with and have children. I honestly didn't think he would remember me. I basically wanted to tell him that I remembered him fondly and wished him well. I got the impression that he bedded a lot of girls and that what he did with to me, was probably a regular habit for him.

      He wrote back and told me that he remembered me very well, and then he described everything we did, down to the dance and to what I had been wearing! He woke up memories in me about our time together that I had not thought about in years. He immediately asked me to have lunch with him so we could talk about old times and chat about the people we'd worked with. I refused at first, but he asked again and again. I had no intentions of seeing another man behind my husband's back. My husband has been a wonderful husband and father and has never laid an angry hand on me or treated me poorly. Just in about the last 10 years of our 30-year marriage, his hold on me has gotten pretty tight, and although I have a Master's degree and a good career, he has a tight reign on me and allows me to have very little money. He has always had trust problems with me, because I wasn't a virgin when we began going together and I dated other people while dating him, while he was always serious about me and has never dated any other woman than me. I even taught him to kiss! Because I feel so confined sometimes, I threw caution to the wind and agreed to meet Rick for lunch. BTW, he is married with 2 adult kids. His wife has never worked, even though they need her to, and she has some serious mental issues, but he has never told me he doesn't love her. He's told me that he has never cheated on her during his 30-year marriage. He also told me there is no passion left between them.

      When we met for lunch, we spent three hours together catching up. We hugged hello, and when we hugged goodbye, he held me tightly and kissed me tenderly on the cheek. It was heavenly. For the past 8 weeks, we have been texting and talking on the phone every day without fail. We have made plans to spend the night together, and I am really scared. But we both feel very nostalgic about our affair from 35 years ago. I think we just want to have a break from our marriages for some tender love and passion. We have met a second time and both of us really want this together. I have made it clear to him that I love my husband and have no plans to leave him. I don't want any drama or problems. This is my way of protecting my heart.

      We are about finished making plans for our overnight rendezvous. I don't know where this will lead us. I know I'm playing with fire, but I just have to do this. What do you all think?

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      Jenny 2 years ago

      Hey Shannon, I read about you wanting to see an old boyfriend from 37 years ago and was wondering if anything had developed? I am sort of in the same predicament

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      Jenny 2 years ago

      Hey Shannon, I read about you wanting to see an old boyfriend from 37 years ago and was wondering if anything had developed? I am sort of in the same predicament

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      lostinlove 2 years ago

      Thank you mickthetech, When I do get him back into my arms I will never let him go again!!!

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      mickthetech 2 years ago

      Dear lostinlove,

      Sounds like my story. Even the year you guys parted was the same year we did. You are right though. I lived my life to make others happy and not me. I now am happy with the man that never left my heart. Remember that in the end, everyone that matters in your life will learn to accept it when they see you happy. My family did and realizes that this was the best thing I did for me. They see a different me now. Good luck and hold on tight.

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      jjhilton 2 years ago

      I don't belive it, I am now the richest/ luckiest/ happiest man on this earth I was just given the go ahead to go after what i have always wanted for 20 years the girl of my dreams that stole my heart when i was just 10 years old is keeping it, i will be moving clear across the country and risking it all even my best friend on something i would kill to make work

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      jjhilton 2 years ago

      Thank you mickthetech, i finely have a chance to talk to her this evening since she works nights its been hard here lately since there is a 3 hour time gap and we dont want to let her current bf find out since he would flip, i have sent my previous employer an email so that i can possibly have a job and a place to stay lined up if she says yes, i have also went though looked at everything and i can have enough saved up in 6 months to where i can make the move and survive for 3 months if needed without a job, if it comes to that point i know it will be the biggest test of faith in my life to go 2500 miles across country away from anyone i can depend on until i get settled but the risk will be worth it

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      lostinlove 2 years ago

      Beautiful story's! I would like to share mine.I dated this guy when I was 13 I lied to him about my age then lied to my parents about his age he was 5 years older then me But i knew i was in love with him.After dating for almost 2 years my mother and his sister broke us up.I have never been truly happy since then .I have always looked for him..Was not willing to let it go took me 36 years to find him. When i did it was the Best day of my life but very scared at the same time felt like i was 13 again.Plus I'am married to my husband now for 27 years ( never been happy) always felt like something was missing in my life felt lost..I found him on fb sent him a very short message.After just a short time I got a message back was scared to open the message.It was a very long letter telling me how much he still loved me and never forgot me and had also tried looking for me.It's been 4 yrs now we have not missed a day talking to each other by message or text or the phone we send each other picture's and we talk about our life .He is also married but unhappy say's he fills the same as me always lost ..I truly believe he is my soul mate.We live in different states so makes things harder we both believed in sticking it out in our marriages.This is were we are today we are getting ready to finally see each other for the first time since 1980 can't be apart no longer .We never wanted to hurt anyone but we are hurting us.The past 4 years has been great in getting to know each other again .I think it's time we move this forward I can't wait he makes me feel fuzzy inside makes me feel young! This is not going to be easy for us to do but we need to be together we are not getting any younger! He still talks to me the same way he did 36 years ago . When we talk for the first time on the phone we both cried! was so heart warming and heart breaking at the same time .We are both nerves moving forward .We need to be together life is to short to keep living or worrying about other people! It only tears a hole in your own heart..Just wanted to add the first time we spoke on the phone he sang our song to me I cried like a baby he really never forgot about US! With in the next month we will be together.So to everyone if your soul is lost keep looking for us remember it was 36 years! And yes after we both get a divorce I will become his wife.And never let anyone come between us again cause as they live their life we hurt

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      mickthetech 2 years ago

      jjhilton,

      I think you should be straight with her and ask her what she wants. It sounds like that is what she is waiting for. Go for it. What is the worst thing that could happen? But from what I am reading I don't think the worst WILL happen. She has put the bug in your ear. Now it's time to get it out.

      Good luck.

      Keep us posted.

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      jjhilton 2 years ago

      If i can get several responses that would be good, this past week we saw 20 years without seeing each other pass, its been 11 months that we have been talking again, i have done some stupid stuff in that time frame, she has joked and asked if i could ever move to LA, but hasnt asked me to, she mentioned if she could get a better job that she could make changes in her life if she wanted to, my question besides quit playing stupid should i ask her if she wants me to get the ball rolling so that i can make the move, should i stay put and see if things will go any where here at home, i'm around my family, i live 50 miles from most of hers, she is out there without family and has only a few friends, or should i make the move without talking to her first ( like that will happen) and hope for the best but to show her i am serious

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      mickthetech 2 years ago

      Dear eyedid,

      For your information, my first husband was physically abusing me. My second husband put me in financial ruins and we were caregivers to my mother which turned out to be me doing EVERYTHING. So please do not judge. If you walk in the shoes of others you might understand but you obviously didn't. We went on to live separate lives and moved on but fate brought us back together. I will not justify myself nor does anyone here need to. I was good to both of them and didn't get it back in return. My marriages were full of empty promises.

      I wish you nothing but happiness but if you ever experience what I did in my life you will understand. BTW the second went and got married 3 months after we were divorced if you need to know that so I don't think he was hurting that much.

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      eyedid 2 years ago

      "I never gave up on him." If that were true, you'd not have married two other people before deciding to see if he was still available and interested in you.

      You were bored the life choices you made and went looking for some excitement, no doubt hurting your husband in the process bt suddenly deciding he wasn't good enough anymore and divorcing him.

      The world is so full of artificial people.

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      Lynette 2 years ago

      My husband also told me a few days ago that he would never forgive me for leaving him and taking his kids away from him. He said I'm taking away his right to see them laugh and their first experiences. They are 3 and 5. That broke my heart because I do love him and am only trying to do whats right for me.

      I told him he could have the kids during the summer and we'll visit for Christmas and he can come visit them whenever he wants. I was also seeing a therapist to deal with all of this. I convinced him to see one as well to help him through this as well and to help him figure out why he was so cold and distant throughout our marriage. He told me a few days ago his therapist helped him figure out he was going through a dark time in his life and he's sorry for taking it out on me.

      He feels now that I know his behavior toward me was not intentional, I should forgive him and be there for him. He's making this so hard, I understand he's just trying to keep his kids and his family together but after years of a sexless marriage and a husband that criticized and barely spoke to me...no kisses, hugs or I love you's, I have lost any intimate feelings toward him at all. I've tried to get it back but he's more like a friend now.

      I just wanted to share that and get it off my chest. You don't have to respond :-)

      I will keep you updated on how things go with James and I in March!

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      Lynette 2 years ago

      Thank you so much for sharing your strength to take your happiness by the reigns! I did the same as you, prayed for God to remove him from my life is this wasn't what he wanted...and he's sending James right to my home town. So I guess thats my answer lol. I believe you did the very best you could and God knows our hearts, and he knows you have a beautiful one!

      Thanks again, I've been so excited to see my lost love but was letting guilt interfere...I will embrace this second chance :-)

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      mickthetech 2 years ago

      Lynette,

      Wow, it's like reading my story when I read yours. Only difference is my love said he would not be the other man and a home wrecker but what he didn't realize was that I knew my marriage was over. At least for me. My ex pleaded and cried that he would change and to give him another chance but with 23 years of chances I was done. I did however go to see my now husband after I got separated. I am a catholic woman and knew that it was wrong but I had to see him. I prayed to God that if this was not right for me to make him go away and I would live my life but it didn't happen. 3 months after I got divorced my ex got married. He didn't even tell our daughter as he was afraid I would find out and try to stop it. LOL. So they move on, trust me. As hurt as they may want us to believe they are, they do. Go with your heart. Life is short. Don't waste it.

      Good luck.

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      Lynette 2 years ago

      ...and Jenny, I agree with Mick. When a man wants you are ready for you, they will do whatever it takes to make you theirs. Accepting a friend request and messaging is so simple. Since he's not doing so it probably means this isn't the right time in his life, or maybe he is trying to politely let you know he has moved on. I wish you so much luck in everything this New Year!

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      Lynette 2 years ago

      I will try to make this as short as possible! When I was 19 I met James while I was in training. We had a connection, but I had a boyfriend so we would hang out and cuddle, but never took it any further. Three years later I got stationed in California, to find out he was there too. He actually worked in the office responsible for in processing me. He told me then he thought it was fate...but again I had another boyfriend that I met 2yrs prior and it was getting serious, however my boyfriend and I ended up getting stationed in two different countries. During this time James and I took turns playing cat and mouse lol. I knew then that I loved him, but we were so young I was 22 and he was 21. I knew he liked me, but never made a point to do what was necessary to keep me.

      I married my boyfriend he married a girl he met a little after me. My husband and I being married with 2 small ones for 7 yrs began to have serious issues. After my son was born my husband and I were only intimate 1x in 2yrs. He became irritable and very distant. I started to feel so small and unwanted by my husband. I found James on Facebook just to hi and see how his life was going. I was at a really horrible place with my self esteem and needed to feel attractive and cared for again. I started contemplating divorce. I was always depressed and hurt b/c of how my husband was treating me. Little did I know that while I was sharing all of this with James 9yrs later...he had went through something similar with his wife an they were now separated living in different countries. He told me he was sorry for not being what I needed back when we were younger and that it was his fault we weren't together now. Even though I wasn't happy in my marriage I told James I would never leave my husband for another man...if I left it would strictly be because I wasn't happy. He understood but told me he would always be my friend and we've kept in touch for the past 5 months.

      I prayed to God to give me the strength to do the right thing, to do things the right way. I realized I was no longer in love with my husband and was too hurt to try anymore. Over the last 5 months I've told my husband I wanted a divorce 3x. Each time it was painful to know how much I was hurting him, because he really had been trying and going to therapy to change...and he has changed, but I have told him the kindest way that I could that the damage from the last 3-4 yrs has taken it's toll on me and I am no longer the same because of it. He would plead and come up with compromises and each time, because I felt so bad for wanting to leave I would give in to waiting or just separating.

      Finally my husband got orders to England and I knew the kids and I could not go. I wasn't ready to be alone with him in a different country again so far away from my family (support system). My husband offered to drive me and the kids to my family in Cleveland in Feb and we agreed we would be separated for a year and then decide again what we would do long term. Meanwhile, James had just separated from Active Duty military and was enlisting in the reserves. I casually asked him, "so whens your training?" He says Feb/Mar. I then say, "ohhhh where to. He says Cleveland!!! I nearly passed. So serious. I was in shock all day. I told my mom (she knew about James for 12yrs). She was excited...I was scared. I was scared because I told God I wanted to do things the right way, I didn't want to cheat, even though I am separated and emotionally divorced already. I knew that with James being sent to training the same time and same place where I would be was either God/fate, or a horrible joke.

      Over the past 5 months I've become so in love with him. His patience, his humor, his thinking and outlook on life...and he says he welcomes my 2 little ones and my dog. We have so much in common all the way down to our childhoods. It's amazing. So now I don't how to handle this. I've been in turmoil ever since. I know what I need and deserve, but my husband doesn't deserve for me to be with someone else before a divorce is settled upon. Thanks for reading this "book" I would appreciate any advice. Thanks a million times!

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      mickthetech 2 years ago

      Jim,

      So glad to hear a happy ending. Good luck to you. Keep us posted.

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      Jim 2 years ago

      Recently, through an internet search, I reconnected to the girl I dated in college 50 years ago. After three weeks of almost daily phone calls, writing and texting we both discovered that we are still very much in love with each other after all these years, our love never did diminish. We have both had terrible abusive marriages and as soon as I get my divorce we will get together again. We live on opposite coasts and, although we are both "old", we feel like teenagers.

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      mickthetech 2 years ago

      Jenny,

      Not everything is meant to be. Unfortunately it doesn't look like he is ready to jump into another relationship so my advice to you is to let it go and if it is meant to be it will in the future.

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      Jenny 2 years ago

      So I asked a friend if She thought it was bad that he hadn't responded even though he has read my messages. Still hasn't declined or accepted and she said to forget him and he is trying to forget the past. But I thought the whole idea was that people do get back in touch with their past and it can be amazing. Should the past staying the past? Is wife is still posting single status but I think they are in the same house still, your thought would be appreciated,

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      Jenny 2 years ago

      So I asked a friend if She thought it was bad that he hadn't responded even though he has read my messages. Still hasn't declined or accepted and she said to forget him and he is trying to forget the past. But I thought the whole idea was that people do get back in touch with their past and it can be amazing. Should the past staying the past? Is wife is still posting single status but I think they are in the same house still, your thought would be appreciated,

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      LostinLove 2 years ago

      Single? Get paid $5000 to search for your love! (A&E Networks)

      A Major Cable Network (A&E) wants to help you find 'the one that got away.'

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      We'll reconnect you with that special someone from your past this Holiday Season.

      Go to www.lostinlove.tv NOW!!!

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      Jenny 2 years ago

      Well I am going about my life as always but I was wanting others opinions as to why he didn't just delete me and be done with it? Is this his way of keeping me on a string cause I told him in my message that I'd let him decide whether to add or delete me. Should I read something into this that he hasn't just quietly deleted me? Inam very confused, pls advise....

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      mickthetech 2 years ago

      Jenny,

      I don't know why he is keeping you in limbo. Just go on with your life and if he sees you doing that maybe it will make him respond.

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      Jenny 2 years ago

      anyone have any idea why oh why he would keep me in limbo? Why not just delete and get on with it? I gave him the opportunity to decline but he hasn't. He just hasn't done anything...I think if it was me I'd just quietly delete and get on with him. He hasn't done that . Why? Pls respond. I am totally in limbo. What could be his reason not to delete if he wasn't interested? Why oh why just leave me hanging? Pls respond as I await your opinion.

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      Jenny 2 years ago

      I'm still in limbo...he still hasn't accepted or declined my request but I notice that he accepted his daughters in the meantime! Looks like he and his wife are still parted as she is still posting single and he has not changed his status from married...sort of why everyone thinks he doesn't get on much but I can see he does just by these little occurrences. However I do get unknown phone calls sometimes and when I answer no one says anything, so I wonder if it is him? Is that going to crazy? But I am sure there is someone on the line but no one responds. How would you read that? Just wishful thinking? Also, when I did bump into him a little over a year ago I no there was still electricity in the air...again, is that crazy? Please give me your honest opinion.

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      palomayoh5 2 years ago

      Jenny what happened?

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      Drew 2 years ago

      Hey Mick,

      I want to update you.

      Recently I went to see my life long best friend while I was passing through our hometown. She is currently juggling men like a circus. I am not really interested in going to far forward with that. She is jumping around a lot and I don't think I would want to get myself caught up in that. I still care about her as she is my lifelong friend.

      I wanted to tell you about somebody else that I met about 4 years ago. Before my wife and I were engaged this young lady and I worked together, and I fell in love with her. She is so beautiful. We became good friends. A couple years ago I thought I would come clean and tell her how I felt.

      After I told her, she looked at me and said, "I cannot be involved with you. I'm sorry, but I am going to start dating someone else". I was still seeing my wife-to-be at the time, and she knew. So I know that was a no-go for her. She left me completely broken-hearted. I really liked the girl and I wasn't married at the time, but she shut me down.

      I took that risk, and that experience kind of ended our friendship as I knew it. In all honesty, I have met a lot of women Mick. I am under 30, but not many have meant much to me. This young lady however means the world to me. For two years, we have not talked or seen each other. I let her go and knew I still loved her in my heart.

      A few months back, I started to say hello over her facebook posts. After two years, I felt we could put some things behind us. Now that I am married, and she has been dating other people. Well, she reached out to me on FB and asked me if I would join her and some of our old friends at a cowboy bar for a couple drinks on her Birthday, which was 3 days ago.

      I told my friend I could not face her. We had a beautiful friendship that blew up and, I just couldn't bring myself to go. My friend calls and says, "we need to be there for her birthday, she invited us". I tried to back out, but he insisted. So I got my nerve up, and went though I was afraid. Just for a couple hours.

      She didn't know I was going to be there. My friend told her I could not show. She apparently seemed upset over it. Anyway I saw her walk in and I was just awestruck. Just as beautiful as before. She lit up at my presence and we shared long hugs.

      After a while she insisted I dance with her. I'm not that great a dancer, but I was all-in. So we went to the dance floor and got off to a terrible start because of me. Then we caught rhythm. She locked in closely to me and it was an electrifying dance. Passionate. That feeling we had when we used to see each other.

      I just wanted to tell you that. It took some real bravery for me to face my past after such a harsh parting of ways.

      On a lighter note. I told my wife I have been considering divorce. She has lightened up a lot, and we have been talking. However, I still feel we have fallen out of love completely.

      That conversation practically ended our friendship as we knew it. We had not spoked for the last two years. Three months ago I said hello on her facebook posts and have a few times since then. She reached out to me this week as it was her birthday and she asked me to join her at a cowboy bar to hang out.

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      Cynthia9768 2 years ago

      The messages go into the "other" folder though and unless she knows it exists (most people do not) then she will most likely not get the message until she happens upon it. It is better to do a friend request.

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      mickthetech 2 years ago

      Dan,

      Even though her fb is private you can send her a message.

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      Author

      mickthetech 2 years ago

      Dan,

      Even though her fb is private you can send her a message.

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      Cynthia9768 2 years ago

      I recently found what I considered my first real love and also the father of my son after over 29 years had passed. It didn't turn out to be as easy as I thought it would be. He has reconnected with our son but he really never loved me. I think in some cases it is better to leave the past in the past as it was in my case. I wasn't looking for love because I am married and relatively happy in that relationship. I was looking for closure. I didn't really get that. What I got was a tearing open of an old wound. My son did get a Father though so there is something positive out of it.

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      Jenny 2 years ago

      Hi I'm back. Still nothing to report except that his "wife" keeps posting family pics of happier days. Haven't had a response back from him since I sent him a friend request. Is it crazy to think that it is good that he hasn't declined my request, he just hasn't accepted my request either. Am I being naive and maybe he has even forgotten that I sent him a fab request? Pls give me your thoughts on this. It's going on close to a year (next February) that her status went to single? If you think I am just being delusional pls tell me so I can get on with my life? Waiting to hear back from you...

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      Dan 2 years ago

      After more than 20 years, I've found my one true love from college but she didnt' know about it. She's happily married with 2 kids already.

      I have a 7 year old daughter too, and separated for 5 years already.

      I need closure, how do I do that? I want to write her a long letter just to have closure. I don't know her contact details, and her facebook and other social media accounts are private.

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      mickthetech 2 years ago

      Hey Jenny,

      I will tell you that my ex recently texted me a picture of me with my family and my first husband who is now deceased. They have a hard time dealing with the loss of their significant other and they are reaching out for hope. It doesn't mean that it will change things. Just don't let these things bother you. If this is meant to be it will happen.

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      Author

      mickthetech 2 years ago

      Hey Jenny,

      I will tell you that my ex recently texted me a picture of me with my family and my first husband who is now deceased. They have a hard time dealing with the loss of their significant other and they are reaching out for hope. It doesn't mean that it will change things. Just don't let these things bother you. If this is meant to be it will happen.

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      Jenny 2 years ago

      Ok well it was nice when I found this site but no one seems to want to respond to my queries so I guess mI'm out of here! Good luck everyone in your endeavours to reunite with past loves!

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      Jenny 2 years ago

      Hi I'm still hoping someone may have an explanation of why someone would post an old family pic from years ago when you are just recently separated. And no one is smiling in this pic intereStingly enough!

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      Jenny 2 years ago

      Well I still have heard nothing. I did see though that his wife has posted an old family picture of her, him and there kids about 15!years ago. She is still saying that she is single but what can this mean? I'm worried that she is now trying to get him back. I realize this is a hard time for them but just what is she trying to say. And ps. The pic is sort of weird cause nobody looks happy! Please give me your thought s on this. Thanks!

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      long lost juliet 2 years ago

      im still here..thinking about. i hve so many things to tell you..but i dnt knw hw to say it.. i missyou..if ur here give me sign.mg... pls.come back..hope to see u in the near future. i wnt to marry and ve with you. love you msg.

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      long lost juliet 2 years ago

      im still here..thinking about. i hve so many things to tell you..but i dnt knw hw to say it.. i missyou..if ur here give me sign.mg... pls.come back..hope to see u in the near future. i wnt to marry and ve with you. love you msg.

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      Jenny 2 years ago

      Well I want to message him but don't want to basically give him an altimatum. I really want to know if you think the fact that he hasn't accepted or declined my friend request means anything? Or is the fact he hasn't done anything speak for itself? I don't understand though that if he didn't want to open up a line of communication he doesn't just decline my request and be done with it? Any ideas of why he wouldn't?

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      mickthetech 3 years ago

      Jenny,

      What I think you should do is before you withdraw the friend request send him another message saying that you will do just that if he doesn't respond and you will let him get on with his life or choose to respond. If he doesn't in a week then go ahead and withdraw. If he wants to get in touch with you after that then he knows what to do. Good luck.

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      Jenny 3 years ago

      Well I am back. It looks like his wife is getting on with her life! I am still in limbo. He still hasn't responded to my message to even say hi nice to hear from you etc. as I think most people would do. He still hasn't accepted or declined my friend request which now I am wondering if I should just go withdraw the friend request and be done with it as I think if someone were interested they would have at least sent a message. am I just putting my hopes on this and from the outside looking in you are thinking ha he is not interested. Pls tell me what you really think this is about. Am I being a fool and most people thinking forget about it!

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      mickthetech 3 years ago

      Drew,

      I wish you luck in whatever you decide and YES, you have to do whatever you decide for YOU because as I realized when I took that leap of faith that it might not have worked out. I was lucky that it did but I knew that this had to be for me and not anyone else. I think we all deserve to be happy.

      Keep us posted.

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      Drew 3 years ago

      Just an update MicktheTech. Things have gotten progressively worse between my wife and I. We almost had a throw down over her college roommate coming to stay who then insulted one of my family members and my wife took her side and not mine.So. I bit my tongue and dealt with the issue after they left.

      My best friend who I have reconnected with after 15 years and have become increasingly close again. Its like we were always together. She keeps asking me to move back to our home town which I happen to live 500 miles away from. My wife is now talking about having a baby and moving somewhere else.

      I have been really stressed over this stuff, but I decided I have terms for our marriage and if they are not important, then I can move on.

      Just wanted to give you the update. I wouldnt move back for my best friend but for me. As much as I love her, she is starting to date and I am not relocate to follow her on her new path. I am just going to stay the course and if things play out alright, then I am all game.

      I do get the feeling that she would put other people aside if she could have me to herself. I do believe that. I just have to respect her current phase since she was trapped in abusive marriage for 6 years.

      Thanks again Mick. DREW.

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      LIONESS 3 years ago

      I Am Married Almost 7yrs And Very Unhappy Ever Since I Tried Every Thing To Make It Work And Was Left Crying And Always Hurt.My Husband Even Hit Till I Got Stitches On My Beautiful Face.I Loved Him & And He Never Protected Me As A Husband Should.I Loved Being Self Employed And Had To Close Everything Down Cause His People Envy And Jealous Me Badly They Hurt Me Spiritually Aswell.Only God Knows I Tried Being Faithful I Tried Making My Marriage Work And After All The Tears & Pain Feelings For Him Left Gradually And For Months I Don`t Even Want Him To Touch Me Till In 2013 Oct 19th I Met This Guy On FaceBook God Alone Knows I Felt The Love Connection So Strongly Even Before I Met Him And When I Did The Love & The Passion That We Shared God Knows I Never Felt That Strong Connection With No One Else.I LOVE Him But He Dumped Me Saying I Am Married Etc And We Can`t Be Friends He Wants To Be My Lover.He Deeply Hurt Me Verbally And Now He Living Life Like A Player.I Heard He Aways Lived Like A Player But This Guy Asked Me To Married And I Am Married So Its Complicated But I Still Love Him,Still Dream Him Still Feel Him Strongly As Before.I got Pregnant For Him And Lose It Whilst Under Stress Missing Him And The Times That We Shared.He Acted Heartless Towards Me It Hurt And Made Me Do Stuff I Never Did Before Like Copy & Paste Stuff He Lied About Others And I Also Put Up His Pic On Fb Stating He Is A Player And He Used Me Etc But I Deleted It.But I Still LOVE Him But I Wonder If He`ll Wanna Ever Be With Me In Life Again After I put Him Up On Fb?He May See That As Betrayal But I Was Betrayed By Him Aswell.

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      JustMyImagination 3 years ago

      Thanks for the encouragement. Part of me says..IF she has any good memories of us together, she could always contact me. I'm not hard to find. But- then again, I often wonder "WHAT IF" she has the same doubts as me... wonders how embarrassing it COULD be for both our families if feelings weren't at all... mutual. I'd like to think we both have fond memories and that a meeting would bring out a wave of nostalgic warm feelings of youth as we caught up with each other-- And really-- I would be fine if we went our separate ways wishing each other well and smiling with that feeling of warm memories and a re-connection. But that could only happen EASILY (hopefully) if it was a chance encounter-- like I should have jumped into when I saw her on the bicycle. It just feels sooo premeditated if I go out of my way to contact her. Agghh... I know I may never get the opportunity for that "chance" encounter again. You, this blog, the other stories make me wonder how far I might go just to find out if something is there. The other thing I am afraid of is that a "bad" result from me directly approaching her.. would put a huge damper on the good memories I do have. Yes, I'm afraid of ruining great memories and feeling... and just have to decide if I would risk that, for the ever so slim chance of finding those feelings again... with the same person. The bad alternative could have her thinking I'm pathetic to be clinging to 30 yr memories...and my life, my family..which is not the 'worst' situation by the way... would have a similar pathetic impression. I do know it will be tough to just keep on hoping for a "chance" encounter. I could increase those chances... but don't want to invade privacy, be a cyber stalker, etc. I'll figure out something. Thanks for the encouragement ... & I'll let you know if anything good or bad ever develops. Thank you.

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      mickthetech 3 years ago

      Dear JustMyImagination,

      If your wife is telling you to find someone else than she may be wanting you to end things. I too had conversations with myself lol but I acted on it. If you can find her again, just see if she would meet you for a leisure lunch or dinner or even for a drink. See what she has been up to and if she remembers you. Then take it from there. Both me and my lost love were in relationships when we first met. We vowed that even if it was a friendship we would never lose each other again. For us it turned into marriage but you will never know if you don't try. I would love to know how this turns out or what you decide to do. Good luck in whatever you decide.

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      JustMyImagination 3 years ago

      Wow. So many people get stuck on ... "the one". That one big "What if ?" from the past. I was in love with a great girl before her, and at least one after... but I've often thought of her over the 30 years since then. Eight years ago I saw her. It was on a charity bicycle ride and she was directing traffic at an intersection. She was not a volunteer- I think she was either waiting for someone she knew, or she just saw all these riders coming through and decided to lend a hand. She was that type even back then. I froze. Many times, I imagined I saw her... on the street... in a car... at the store. It was later that I thought about it... and her family's vacation cottage was less than two miles from the intersection I saw her at. I spend 190 miles pedaling over two days and she appeared at THE closest spot to where I knew the family had a place. And I froze. I could not believe it was her. She said something like "Keep going!" (and more)-- but 100's of well-wishers were saying such things. She probably did not recognize me-- 30+ lbs & years later, helmet, sunglasses... but we exchanged huge grins as I rode by & thanked her... like she was an ordinary fan of the ride. I was ecstatic!... and afraid if I went back to say "Hi !!... Remember me?" ... that she would remember, and that the smiles we had exchanged would turn to a puzzled frown as she remembered how clingy I had gotten 25 years before when she broke up with me. So- since that day eight years ago, I look for her on that ride... & think of her even more often.

      Now, six months ago, I stumble upon an obituary. A sibling of hers sadly died. But I knew it was her family, and there was her married name and city she lives in, RIGHT THERE on the computer. Now, I would hate to think of myself as a cyber stalker, but after a few clicks of the mouse, I was looking at a picture of her from just two years ago. YES, it WAS her I saw while on that bike... and another quick search revealed that the old family cottage was now in her name (Oddly, not her married name). I have not been doing more searches since then. Part of me likes to think back to when we were sooo different from who we are now... and how perfect things were... for a short time back then. But part of me just wants to see her smile again. I think about her way too much, dream about her, and wonder how to make it stop. Unlike people 'here', I find it hard to be hopeful about ever doing something about these feelings. Was it "perfect" back then?... or was it just how I remember that too short a time we were together. My wife, who years ago told me she was not "in love" with me anymore, would flip out. Sure, we love each other, and we are partners in this family, this household-- but our kids are grown and out of the house. If my long ago love had ANY idea about my feelings... she would have to think it's some kind of mental illness. Way back when, back in college, she was 100% right-- I had zero direction and a whole lot of growing up to do. If we saw each other, face to face, could I pass off a strong emotional response as just a "wave of nostalgia" washing over me?. I ALREADY feel like I'm overstepping boundaries just by thinking about her! Heck- I even have imaginary talks with her as I walk the dog! I cannot "go for it !" and hope for the best. All I can envision is her being freaked out by an old ex boyfriend that never really let go... and my family !! My wife is always saying I should find someone else, kiddingly... but I know part of her would not mind being single either. We were both pretty young when we married. We were dating less than a year after I had been with the "perfect" one. AgggHHHhh!!.. Since stumbling upon her through that obituary, and finding the recent picture... I'm thinking about her more than ever. It seems like ALL the time. And get this-- Here's an unintended side effect--- BECAUSE I'm thinking of her... and often in a state of imagined happiness, contentment, "Love"... I think my wife is finding me more appealing ! For most of the recent years, I usually feel like I'm in her way. Ohh it's getting more messed up by the day. A long gone girlfriend who has more than likely forgotten me. Me in a cloud of "what if ?" fantasy. And my family with no clue. How can I see past what could easily end as whole pile of embarrassed stupidity?? Any advice on what to do wit these thoughts would be great. Get over my fear? Fix (or end) family/wife problems before doing something stupid?

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      mickthetech 3 years ago

      Dear Kismet,

      I read your post here. The only thing I can say is tell him how you feel and leave the rest up to him. He may feel he needs to move on because you ignored him or maybe he is scared of rejection again or maybe even that he is truly in love with this woman. At any rate, you need to tell him just so you have peace of mind. You never know how it will turn out but as I have said and many others here have said, everything happens for a reason and what is meant to be will be. Good luck.

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      julie 3 years ago

      I am so glad to have found this page n b able to express what many people dont understand out here. Back in 89 I fell in love with the church drummer of my church/Pastors son. As we dated his family n my dad had conflict due to doctrine. This was enough to turn his family against our relationship. They started to push the secretary of the church on him. The stress his family caused him was great as they no longer wanted him with me because of my dad beliefs. 8 mos later he said he couldn't go on. I heartbroken as I was jumped into a relationship to try to get over the hurt, but that turned into disaster in my life. I had 2 kids n the whole time married I hurted cause I could never get him off my mind or heart. Now in 09, I found him on MySpace. We spoke several times. (he called me) he married the secretary as his family wanted. But his life as not been easy with her either. When we spoke, he reminded me of one of the out most beautiful night we had back in 90 n the gifts n things I had done for him. He, being that we have our Christian beliefs I think is afraid to express how he truly feels. He stopped calling me a yr ago. I have been separated for 2 yrs now n filing a divorce. Lately I have unfriend him on facebook several times but on mothers day once again he friend requested me n send me a message plus asked me for my number. I dont know what to thnk of this. Could it be possible that he still loves me? I have never stopped loving him n have always felt we could've had a great life n ministry together. Everything happens for a reason right? I sometimes think that there will come a day where he'll get tired of all the things he's put thru in his marriage n come looking for me. Am I wrong for such thought? I love him soooo much. N he knows this cause I have let him know. But now on FB I try to hold myself back as much possible to have the least contact possible cause at the end of the day I hurt. I feel we love each other but we were raised to believe that u don't just walk out of marriage, though I have walked out of mine cause I got tired of the abuse from a man I never loved. Could it be possible that finding each other after 16 yrs lead to reunion in future. I believe he loves me as he kept reminding me of how we both felt that one night. Thank u for listening.

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      kismet13 3 years ago

      I'm just wondering why no one commented on what i wrote about my first love from 3 days ago. I would also like some advice from Mickthetech or any of you.. thank you & i will be waiting, and oh btw i'm not 13 i was born on the 13th of a month..it's one of my lucky numbers.. sincerely, kismet13

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      mickthetech 3 years ago

      Drew,

      Somehow I get that feeling too. Good luck.

      Mick

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      Drew 3 years ago

      Mick,

      I left out an important detail. The friend that came with us was not the guy she has been seeing, but a girlfriend of hers. I believe her girlfriend would keep her in perspective if anything unexpected came up. Since it was a pleasant meeting and I got along with her friend, I think all went well.

      She likes the guy friend she is seeing, but you know, I don't care about that. He can have her all he wants because when I become available I get that feeling she will be too.

      Sorry for confusion.

      Drew

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      Drew 3 years ago

      Mick,

      Made it back home. Now an update:

      After getting back to home base, I wrapped things up with my In Laws and went to stay with my cousin in the city. Had a good time seeing my cousin; her and her husband were more than hospitable to me. In contact with my long lost friend, we agreed to meet Saturday morning @11am.

      It was her weekend off from the kids (Lucky Me). Woke up and she dropped a brick on our "plans". She told me her friend was accompanying us on our day out. I kinda didn't like that, I mean we were attached to the hip as children always us two alone. The thing being I never had any attraction to her when we were younger. I think I did not know what real beauty was then, and young boys are shallow as are many of their older counterparts.

      Looking back I didn't think she was much pretty at all, probably why we made such great friends(never distracted by beauty). After we reconnected I saw she had blossomed into a bombshell. That actually made me nervous. She has the body of a woman I have hardly ever dated.

      Continuing forward. I drove to meet her. Got there. Gave her a big hug. However after that she treated me like the plague because she feels I am off-limits. She was candid that she is seeing her other friend, though it is nothing "serious". Then her friend arrived.

      So we went downtown. Had lunch, spent the day talking even though her friend got as much face time with her as I did (not fair). I would normally feel deeply offended about that sort of thing, but it was that or bust. We actually had a good time. A few times I saw that same old person I always knew and it made feel good that she is still the same. Tell me I am wrong: I'm almost sure the friend came with us on purpose because of the situation.

      I haven't lived in the city for 7 years. I moved. Turned out I knew my way around more than they did. So we did several cool things and we finally made our way back to her house. With old girlfriends I always felt like the destination was always the end (Period), but I didn't feel weird about this time.

      We got out and the moment happened: her friend left. So we finally sat down and talked one to one. She walked through the details of how her divorce is playing out. I got to see her angry side. Intense. Then again I see it as her way of protecting herself from fear.

      I'm not sure how we reached our conclusion. I told her about how messed up my marriage is right now and all. I stopped and then asked what she thought. She said, "I don't have an opinion. I can't believe you would like that Andrew, we both know you are better than that". We wrapped it up and stood up.

      Closing moment when people say goodbye, she looked me in the eyes and said, "Well, if you and your wife........(long pause).......you know where I am now". She walked inside her house as I said goodbye and acknowledged her statement.

      That was the end of our first meeting in 15 years. I am actually very pleased with seeing her and am attracted to my best friend. So hope you enjoyed this update. Thanks. Drew

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      kismet13 3 years ago

      Hi mickthe tech, hi all.. well it's kind of funny but i was in a thrift store, savers getting my older son some clothes for his birthday when a big crystal heart on a pendant caught my eye. I joked with my sons that i need love, i found my love.. well that was July 10th of this year. I had no idea that exactly 7 days later while just thinking about my past and theone guy that was really good to that after 22 years i would fund him! i sent him a message heard nothing back then sent a friend request & he added me. I was so happy then i became apprehensivebecause he states that he is engaged on there and has pix of him, her & their children. i have never stopped thinking about him all these years since summer of 1991 where we spent 6 very intense weeks together & he ended up being my 1st time & my first love.. i glowed & was very happy. i don't think n no matter how much i tried that i was ever that happy with any of my subsequents boyfriends. But in1992 i messed up, i was in the army and i wrote him telling him i was gioing to get married.. big mistake.. well i didn't get married & when i tried to write him he sent tghe letter back return to sender. I really hurt him. ten in 2005 i saw him in the grocery store in my hometown and instead of talking to him i ignored him becuz my boyfriend at the time's daughter had died of leukemia the previous year & i was trying to be a loving & loyal girlfriend. i could kick myself cuz that relationship didn't work out either. so now i wrote him & basically declared my feelings for him but becuz he is engaged i was very respectful with what i said but couldn't help telling him that i love him and always will. i just don';t understand why or how after all these years that 6 weeks made such an impression on me & i have never found that connection & deep caring since not even with my sons's fathers. but i feel like an idiot declaring my feelings to him when i might not mean anything to him anymore.. i just know i love him 7 want him to be happy. and maybe he'll say something or cut me off i don';t know but this page has given me hope & i will keep you posted.. long live & hooray for true love!!!

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      Drew 3 years ago

      Mick...

      Finally back home after a long time out of town.

      To update you. I met up with my long lost best friend. The situation kept changing. In the end she offered me 5 hours of her time. Kicker, was she brought along a friend. So she wasn't sure if she could fully trust me. We had a good time, lunch, and enjoyed meeting her friend. The friend finally left leaving us time to talk one on one. She was candid that she is involved with this other friend of hers (I'm sure sexually). She has a lot of angst towards her cheating husband and I can see how she is acting after her marriage fell to pieces.

      To be clear I was not reaching out to her, as I have not been in contact with her over 7 years. She approached my family to re establish contact with me. As good old friends I felt it was good that I keep a far distance from her new life and marriage. I was never attracted to her when we were kids. I always loved her. I told her that when we were together. She said the same to me, except she may have liked when we were kids. Not sure. Before I left she made two statements after I told her my current situation. She said:

      "Drew, that is not you. I don't understand why you choose to live this way. If your wife if is this harsh to you, please don't get her pregnant. You will always have to stay connected to her. You got to learn to cut your losses".

      She also said:

      "If things don't work out between you and your wife"

      I looked into her eyes and she stopped talking. I read the rest of her sentence on her face. It was an open ended sentence.

      I told her, "you will be seeing me". She was nothing I was thinking she might be but she is uniquely my friend, the one I always loved and walked to class 18 years ago. I love her like I did then. She is still the same person. We had good moments on Saturday.

      Just thought you should know. It was 15 years, since our last meeting and long overdue. Hope this leads to good things. Thanks again Mick. Drew

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      Maly 3 years ago

      I never truly been depressed before, but now I am so very lost. I have been looking for my first love for over 26 years. We were in college together and I transferred to another University my Junior year. We kept in touch via snail mail for 7 months--always ending our letters with LOVE followed by our name. After a horrific fire that burned all my pictures and all my other belongings, it took me 5 months to gather enough money to head home to visit Jonathon. To my surprise he had moved. I hired the 1st of 4 investigative teams soon after my visit home--with no results. The 2nd team found his father's information--whom I called immediately, but all he told me was that his son was marrying and I should leave him be. Happy that he had found happiness--I told his dad that I simply wanted to thank him for his kindness. You see he and I never consummated anything, nor did we even hold hands or hug. I was screwed up (intense fear of being touched) resulted after years of sexual violent abuse. But he understood and accepted me and my fears. He was the first person to ever tell me he loved me (even if in only a letter), so in my heart I promised that one day I would hug him and tell him how much I appreciated him. I make attempts every 3 to 4 years to search. AND I THINK I FOUND HIM. BUT YOU SEE THE SOCIAL MEDIA NETWORK SAYS HE IS NOW DECEASED at 52. Even though I hadn't found him I always believed that I would see him one day, and now I'm not only at a loss- my heart is lost.

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      mickthetech 3 years ago

      Drew,

      Yes you said it all when you said let what will be. If it's meant for you to be together it will. As for your wife, I was in the same boat. I got divorced for me not my long lost love. It was 23 years of marriage and I had to make a decision to throw that all away and be happy with my new love or alone or stay and be miserable. In the end, I made the right decision for ME not anyone else. Good luck in whatever you decide and yes please keep us all posted.

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      Drew 3 years ago

      Hello Mick....

      I looked at your advice and I made the decision I did. I went on vacation with my In Laws and Wife. Belief me when I say, I was this close (two fingers close together) from not going. My wife acts like a complete ass. The reason I should have not gone on vacation to stay with my long lost friend.

      My friend freshly divorced is already "hanging out" (seeing regularly) a friend of her newly divorced husband. She changed her plans on me a few times. I tested the water to see how hot it got for a reaction. She was hot, then cold, then lukewarm, then hot again (didnt expect it). Now she appears to be a respective warm in regards to the fact that I am married which seemed to let her down. She missed by 14 months. Too bad.

      So I will be going to see her for a few hours on Saturday because that is what she offered me. Begger cant demand. I have decided to back off and let be what will. My family told me to divorce my wife because of her and not someone else. I agree my wife has earned the right to be divorced from me.

      The bottom line being I gave her up a long time ago. Almost forgot about her and our young years were very special. She has said plenty of wonderful things to me about being afraid to see me again. Im glad to have her back. I hope I dont lose her again. I should not either.

      However my wife has been acting extremely nice as of late. When we are at home she is a pest that does not contribute and neglects me. Most sensible people would be gone, but our time together has been great and terrible. Afraid to say the good times are probably all but gone. She wants supreme control over what happens to me the rest of my life.

      You can probably see I made the wrong choice. I have had a lovely Colorado vacation and my In Laws are wonderful people. I just wanted to check in with you and I will let you know how things go. Thank you for your initial intuitive advice. You were right. I had a old time at the expense of me enduring my wife and her demands. Thanks again.

      Drew

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      Gustavo523 3 years ago

      Everything that HAS happened in your life, everything that IS happening in your life, and everything that WILL happen in your life...is happening for a reason!

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      mickthetech 3 years ago

      Nathan,

      As I have said in many of my comments here....everything happens for a reason. Good luck.

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      Nathan 3 years ago

      I was recently involved in an automobile accident and had split my head open and my shoulder, and was in the hospital for two months. Previously before that, I had been dating many girls but nothing ever worked out. I reached a point where I gave up. Then the accident happened. After I got out of the hospital, due to the time in there, I was forced to move back to my old home. I have worked very hard in my recovery and thankfully I have recovered. As I was going around trying to work with bills that I had I walked into my phone store. When I got inside I sat down and talked with an associate there. To my surprise I saw a girl working there and thought I knew her but could not make out where, and then she came up to me and I could not believe who it was. It was a girl that I had gone to school with and we had spent a lot of time together studying. We both had crushes on each other, but after school I had to move to a new city and lost connection. Amazingly, she told me that I must not ever lose contact again with her and gave me her phone number. She also comforted me after I told her about my wreck. I have never been married, but I have found out she is going through a horrible divorce. At this point, I am just happy to have seen her and I believe it is a miracle. I am not going to rush anything, in fact I am just going to let things happen. Whatever happens, it will be okay, even if we never get together romantically I am just thankful after my wreck for having the chance to talk to her and I am thankful for how comforting and how good of a friend she has been to me since I saw her again.

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      mickthetech 3 years ago

      Dear SMSmith,

      I too left my family, daughter and grandbabies but surprisingly my daughter moved closer to me. Just make sure that his intentions are that he is ready to give up the one he has now for you. It took me 1 year before I was willing to commit despite my love for my man. I did marry ultimately but I had to be sure for both of us. We are both glad we did. Good luck. I hope it all works out for you. Let us know how it goes.

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      Reese 3 years ago

      Thanks! Very happy for you as well!

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      mickthetech 3 years ago

      Reese,

      Yes absolutely that what's meant to be will always find a way. I'm so happy for you.

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      Reese 3 years ago

      I too have found my happily ever after again...after 16 years of bad decisions.

      I am 35 now. I've known the love of my life since I was 8. He was 10 at the time. His parents were related to my mom's co-worker so growing up we both attended a lot of family gatherings together, maybe once or twice a year. I looked forward to each gathering because by the time I was 10 I had a huge crush on him. There were other kids there but somehow we always ended off on our own, playing hide and seek or cards or video games. We just "clicked". I had a feeling by the time that I was 13 that he might have feelings for me too but I was always too afraid to say anything. I went on to high school and continued to doodle his name in every notebook that I had...with hearts around it of course...lol. I continued to attend the bi yearly gatherings with hopes that something would develop, but not a word. I ended up going out with someone from my high school during my junior/senior year and stopped attending the gatherings because of it. When I graduated from high school my mom threw a party for me and invited all of her friends. HE showed up to the party! I was so happy to see him but torn because my THEN boyfriend was off at bootcamp. I exchanged phone numbers with my crush and we talked a couple times on the phone but when he asked I turned him down because I was in a relationship : / it was all so traumatizing to me because it was the hardest decision i ever had to make. After a couple attempts he went on and lived his life and I did the same. I ran into him on a couple occasions, one of which I was with my THEN boyfriend and didn't say a word to the crush. I knew that if I did I would let him into my life and I didn't want to hurt my boyfriend at the time. I ended up marrying my boyfriend and having a son, only to find out a year later that he was cheating on me. Trying to keep my family together I took him back to find out a year and a half later that he was cheating on me again. I moved out with my son, asked my mom about my Crush, only

      To find out that he had married 3 months prior. : ( once again I moved on with my life and got married on the rebound to someone that I loved but was not in love with.

      About 6 or 7 years ago my crush's cousin ended up working at the same company that I worked at. Because his cousin knew my parents, my parents and I ended up getting invited to his cousin's brother's wedding which I attended with my THEN husband. I remembered getting dressed up for this event because I knew my crush would be there. When I saw him, with his two children and wife, I couldn't do anything but hide. I knew that if I said hi that we would end up starting something that we couldn't finish because we were both married. I had two children after this, trying to convince myself that being is a safe but loveless marriage was the right thing to do for me. 4 years later I realized that I was depressed and that the best thing I could do

      For my 3 children was to be happy so that I could make them happy. I left my husband. Two years after my separation, my crush's cousin ended up getting married and invited myself

      and former

      Co workers to attend the reception. I saw him as soon as I walked in the door but managed to avoid him almost the entire night. That is until

      One of my best friends walked right up

      To him and asked him if he saw me and if he'd said hello. He replied that he saw me but didn't say hello, then he dropped his head ashamed and walked right over to me...turns out he was going through a divorce too. We have been inseparable ever since and that was almost a year ago.

      I was inspired by all

      Of the stories and just wanted to share mine. Happily ever after does exist and if things are meant to be, they inevitably find a way to happen.

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      mickthetech 3 years ago

      Dear jjhilton,

      You will know when the time is right when that time comes. It took me a little bit of time to realize this is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with although we were engaged I wouldn't commit to marrying him but one Monday as I was working I went home and said, "we are getting married this Thursday". So I guess that was the right time and we did. Been happy ever since. Just follow your hearts.

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      jjhilton 3 years ago

      I'm now in a unique situation now, due to things happening in my life it has brought me back to Ohio, about a week ago her ex moved back to Ohio with the kids, things are still iffy with her husband. We have gotten to the point of not trying to hide us talking. We have got family and friends on both sides telling us to be prepared for something amazing to happen with us since there is no way we could of gotten together any other way, without both of us needing a reason to move back, we have also been told I'm here getting things ready. My question is this, is there a chance they may be right and we are not seeing it yet, and if everyone is right how will we know when the time is right

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      mickthetech 3 years ago

      Hi Jade,

      Do a google search. I found mine through google which took me to reunions.com. He wasn't signed up with FB at the time but his pic came up. Good luck.

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      jade 3 years ago

      Recently have been thinking of my ex bf and want to contact him but not successful. I just want to say sorry for we broke up 16 years ago and parted our own ways without even settling some relationship issues and not coming to good terms.

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      mickthetech 3 years ago

      Neenaof2,

      What do you need advice with?

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      neenaof2 3 years ago

      I NEED some advice PLEASE