ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Are You Keeping Your Relationship Spicy?

Updated on April 1, 2013
Miss-Adventures profile image

My passion is writing about love, sex, dating, and relationships. I write based on my own personal experiences and those that I relate to.

It’s an age-old myth that after years in a serious, committed marriage (or relationship) the "spiciness" between the couple begins to fizzle—and then fade. However, it’s called a myth for a reason! I know numerous couples who have been dating or married (for at least seven years), and they have mastered the art of maintaining the spiciness.

So, what’s the secret to keeping the relationship hot, hot, hot? Besides being physically attracted to each other, the couple works as a team, planning date nights, treating each other special, consistently showing their appreciation for each other, and keeping themselves healthy. Most importantly, they keep things from getting too routine in the bedroom—it’s all about spontaneity, people! In addition, you need to be aware of your significant other’s on and off “button”—i.e things that that turn them on and things that make them have a headache. As you get to know you partner better, you’ll learn their pet peeves, their frustrations—and on the contrary—what they enjoy.

For example, if you know that your significant other hates when the toilet seat is left up, or when he/she hates when dirty dishes are left in the sink, take a clue! Don’t continue to do things that frustrate them or create unnecessary drama—plain and simple. Instead, be conscious and make an effort to avoid tension—i.e. if you know it will make the other person happy…put the toilet seat down. Take a few minutes to ask (and actually listen) about how their day was at work; this will show you care.

I know there are people reading this that are saying, “But we have children! There is no time to keep things spicy!” Fortunately, children do have an early bedtime. If this is instilled in your household, it (should) mean more quality time with your spouse. Also, there are babysitters! By committing to at least one date a week—getting dressed up and doing something romantic—it will help keep the relationship exciting. Either bring flowers home, make dinner for each other (or together), help with chores, get a couples massage, etc.—these are merely simple suggestions to keep the spiciness up. At the end of the day, don’t blame your rut because you have children, you made them together, so that’s worth celebrating.

Simply “going through the motions” is boring—every relationship needs a little spice. Ask yourself, what are you doing to create some zing in your relationship?


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • Miss-Adventures profile imageAUTHOR

      Stephanie Bailey 

      5 years ago from Denver

      Thank you Mary for reading!

    • profile image

      Mary Roberts-Bailey 

      5 years ago

      Some very good ideas to help couples remember and maintain the joy in the relationship.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)