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Avoid Being Catfished When Dating Online

Updated on April 11, 2015

Okay so you see this super attractive man or woman on the internet. This person suddenly expresses interest in you. This person now has day and night to talk to you and cares for you so much. Is it possible-yes. Is it likely a true presentation? .......Highly unlikely.

It was once said: You can be anyone or anything on the internet. For the most part that is true. While you read the profiles and attempt to read between the lines sometimes your desire to have a relationship can allow one to ignore red flags. While it is good to date with an open heart you can still apply discernment when dating online. We can hope for Cinderella or Prince Charming but the person online could be far from either.

The person could be:

A nice person who hasn't met the right man/woman

A psychotic stalker, mentally ill, or physically abusive person searching for new prey

A person who wants to filter the people you meet up front so you don't waste your time

A person attempting to sell someone on physical standards they do not currently possess

A person involved in a relationship or marriage while presenting themselves as single and available to date

Ap -barbara Ortutay (2013)

"54 Percent Of Online Daters Found Someone Who Seriously Misrepresented Themselves"

If you have ever watched the show Catfish on MTV you know what it's like to watch people realize the person they think they love was only: using them for money, not who they presented themselves to be, 200 pounds heavier than their profile picture, or had sexuality preference issues. These are just some of the issues that present themselves when dating online.

So here are the obvious ways not be to Catfished:

  1. Do not carry on an extensive phone relationship if that person lives in the same state as you. Put a time limit on the number of phone calls, electronic interaction, and DO NOT constantly text. This person can't get your heart without presenting themselves to you face to face, sooner rather than later. If you live in the same state you should be able to meet up with this person within 3 weeks of having a few conversations. Your conversations and texts should give you an indication of that person and they can not date you over the phone.

  2. If the person is out of state and you are looking for something serious,unless you are willing to move, you should keep your conversation to being friends. No extensive phone conversations and frequent texts. What for? You have no way of verifying the image and information presented to you is true.

  3. Ladies stop filling your head with the thought that every man is your prince waiting to woo you. While there are some good, no great guys out there, not every man is some prince charming behind the keyboard. No Cinderella story begins with her never seeing the prince.

  4. If the person is never available to meet or frequently cancels on you (more than 3 times) then assume the worse and walk away. Canceling dates, no shows, or calling to reschedule is disrespectful and displays no value for you, your feelings, or your time.

  5. Listen to people. If you stop being one dimensional and focused on yourself, telling a random stranger everything, then you will allow the other person to reveal things about themselves. From there you can really determine if the profile or presentation fits the man or woman that you think you know. What CPA goes to work after 6? What person attends all night study parties for college?

  6. If the person is involved or married it will show. Infrequent requests to meet, canceling dates right after making plans, only talking to you during the day, texting/unavailability at night. Conversation only occurs infrequently or on certain nights. These are all signs that the person is involved.

  7. If possible skipe. You can't present a fake photo when you are streaming live.

Am I saying love does not exist online, absolutely not.

“It's all fun and games till someone gets hurt.” Author Unknown

Have you ever been catfished when dating?

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