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Before You Ask: Will You be My Girlfriend

Updated on January 5, 2011

So, you finally meet your dream woman. You can't stop thinking her every day and night. All you can think of is should I ask her to be my girlfriend? Not so much, my friend. Before you ask her to be your girlfriend, there are few things that has to be done to ensure the answer you want: Yes, I do

You Have to be Exist

OK, so you are not ghost, and not invisible in this world. But are you invisible from the woman you would like to approach?

Will Smith in the movie Hitch make a good point that, to approach the woman of your dream, she should be aware that you exist. (BTW, I would suggest you to watch the movie if you haven't). Maybe the method in the movie is to artificial, or not applicable in the real world, but the idea make a good sense.

Element of surprise is the best to become visible to the woman. If you already know the woman for quite some time, surprise her. Bring her something from your last trip,something that she really like. Be creative, and do your homework to find out her favorite brands, gadget, handicraft, etc

It might be easier to exist if you just meet the girl. Make an excuse to meet her again, or to ask for her phone number. For example, if you just know this woman from a dinner or party, ask her if she will come to the next dinner planned among your mutual friends. Ask for her phone number, and make sure you call her before the next dinner.

Ask Her Out

Daydreaming won't get you anywhere, so once the woman knows that you exist, time to ask her out. But where?And what to do?

Once I asked a woman out for a first date to check a house for sale, which I intend to buy. Bold move, huh? Yeah, and the woman now become my wife. So, forget about the usual "Let's go for movie", or "Let's go for dinner". Be creative. Remember, element of surprise!

One good way to start is from what the woman do for a living. My girlfriend (now wife) is an architect, so it will flow naturally for me to ask for her opinion before buying a house.

Stay Visible Around Her

Now that you are visible, and already ask her out, you need to stay visible. In essence, you want to maintain contact, but not too much and causing irritation to her.

Give her a call every 1-2 days, but not too often. Make sure that on each call you have something fresh to say instead of asking: "how are you doing?" Find out her interest,and build conversation around it. If she is interested in food, you can start by sharing the great food you just tried, ending it up by asking her to try as well,and stop by for a cup of coffee.

The advance in communication technology makes it even easier to keep in touch. One nudge in Blackberry, or in any Instant Messenger, asking for address, recommendation, etc, is good enough. Focus on quality of conversation, not quantity

Set a Deadline

This chasing and after a woman can't go forever. After 3 months of going out with her, talk, and chatting session, you must decide whether to make your move to ask her to be your girlfriend or not.

There are many reason of why you must make your move after 3 monts, which can be found in my hub here

Good luck next time you meet your dream girl


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