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Being in Love With an Alcholic

Updated on July 18, 2016

Being in love with an alcoholic is one of the toughest things besides being in love with someone with a drug addiction. While there are most similarities it is still a hard thing to go through. When you are in a relationship with an alcoholic you will have many emotional ups and downs. You can never count on the other person to give their 100% to you. You will always end up being disappointed and let down in the end.

When alcoholics are drunk they could get violent. If they ever lay a hand on you do not take it. Abuse is abuse. Do not settle for it and say that they didn't know what they were doing because they were drunk or fall into the trap that they love you. Someone's actions when they are drunk are just as bad as when they are sober. The same goes with cheating. When people are drunk they let loose. If you find out that your alcoholic boyfriend or husband cheated on you because he blacked out do not settle and still be with him. You deserve better.

Most people let cheating slide if one person was drunk. Once again it is just as bad as doing it as if someone was sober. Why would you keep on doing that to yourself? Why would you stay with someone who is going to keep on hurting you like this? While you may love him it is not worth the pain. There are many other guys out there who would be so much more loyal to you.

There are many ways to spot an alcoholic also. If he shows up late for work or is always missing work. If he has a bad temper. If he has bloodshot eyes. If he acts differently and all of a sudden is super flirty he may be drunk. If he gets moody and irritable or has a loss or appetite. If he oversleeps. If all he wants to do is hang out at bars. If he is always in debt because he spends all his money on alcohol.

If you live with an alcoholic and you see them just sit around all day, sleeping or doing nothing it will get to you. The only way it won't get to you is if you or unmotivated like that also. Their down moods will bring you down.

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If they aren't willing to get help it is going to be a constant struggle with your relationship. Their will be constant fighting or they will be unemotional available to you. When they drink they will ignore you and avoid you. many alcoholics isolate themselves from family, friends and loved ones who aren't alcoholics. They are ashamed of their problem and they do not want to get lectured for it. So they start hanging out with people who like to drink and stop hanging out with people who do not have a problem. It hurts the people who really care about them.

There are places that can get help. If you want your relationship to survive and you want to see this person make something of yourself you will encourage them to get help. There are also self help books or ways to go online and find self help. Of course it may not be as efficient as going to an actual rehab and getting the actual professional help.

If your loved one isn't willing to get help then you have to make the choice to walk away. Do not sit back and keep going down the path you are on. You are only hurting yourself in the end. It is bad to be an alcoholic but it is even worse to be in love with one. Being in love and staying with an alcoholic will destroy you. So you have to make the choice to say "Get help or I am leaving."

You don't have to sit back and watch your relationship fall apart. You do not have to keep on getting hurt and crying everyday. You do not have to take abuse. You do not have to be with someone who is not loyal to you. You have the option to encourage this person to get help and come out and start a new and better relationship so the both of you could become happier or you could start a new life where you could be happy and find the guy who will actually treat you right.


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    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 18 months ago

      Life is too short to be taking on "projects"!

      It's not worth putting your happiness, well being, and living standard in jeopardy by becoming emotionally invested in someone with unresolved issues. It's human nature for a lot of women to go into "nurturing mode" and many of them actually like feeling "needed" in this way.

      They imagine themselves helping the person recover and having a happily ever after life with him where he loves and appreciates her.

      Rarely if ever does that happen. Eventually the woman either forces herself to walk away or she allows herself to sink with him.

      The goal in life is for two healthy people to come together and build a life together. Life is a (personal) journey. One should seek healing prior to pursuing relationships with others. And if you are healthy remember there are over 7 Billion people on this planet! Don't think (you) have to settle for alcoholics and drug addicts in order to have a chance at love.

      One man's opinion!:)