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Bridesmaids: Creative Ways to Ask Your Girls!

Updated on December 3, 2012

He put a ring on it, so now what?

Hopefully, you have just had one of the best moments of your existence- your future MR. has just proposed. Have you been planning your wedding since you were a little girl? Or are you just getting started and have NO CLUE where to start?

Well, something that should probably take the least effort (however can be difficult if you are deciding between leaving someone out or counting them in) is choosing your bridesmaids. If you are having a hard time deciding who to include, keep a few of these points in mind.

  1. It is your wedding- this is not the time to make everyone else happy!
  2. Are you including someone because you just think it is the right thing to do?
  3. I already have enough girls, but I really want X to be in the wedding.
  4. If you do not ask or do X, will you regret it?
  5. The opinions of others are taking a toll.
  6. You don't want to have fewer/more bridesmaids than your fiance' has groomsmen.

So, Let's go over each one:

1. Make sure that you keep in mind that this is the one day in your life that it is all about the love you and your husband have for one another. Do not sweat the small stuff, because you have the rest of your lives to spend together and this is ALL ABOUT YOUR FUTURE not theirs.

2. Are you getting pressure from your aunt "what's her name?" to include cousin "who's that?"
in your wedding party? There are polite ways to turn people down if they are expecting you to include someone that you do not know very well (or an old friend that feels they should be included even though you haven't talked in years!). Try saying:

  • Wow, that is so kind that you would offer, but I actually am not sure what we are doing for the wedding party yet.
  • I may be keeping my wedding party small.
  • I was actually thinking of including you more in the ceremony, would you be a reader?

3. Who cares if there is an odd number! These are supposed to be your nearest and dearest ladies (or men) to your heart. If you really want to add one more, it is only your opinion that matters in the end.

4. If you not asking or not doing something is going to lead to regrets down the road for one reason or another, then go for it! As mentioned, you want to make this a happy day of celebration, not one where you will be worrying or regretting.

5. If someone is being too opinionated, plan a time to go grab a coffee and discuss what you are thinking. Although they may not want to hear it, tell them you love their ideas, but this is what you want to do for YOUR wedding. Sometimes you may have someone trying to relive their wedding or influence you based on what they want for the future. Bring pictures and your ideas so that you can show them YOUR vision. Say, oh your idea the other day really inspired me to do...

6. Not that it is traditional, but my sister had 6 bridesmaids and her husband had 12 groomsmen!! Yes, you heard that right. The men walked the ladies 2 by 1 down the aisle and the pictures and event looked wonderful! I actually had 9 and my husband had 9- is that ridiculous? Probably, but I could not have gone through my day without all of my girls. They collectively made my day the most special.

The Best Bridesmaids EVER

Hmmm....a little too sexy?  These dresses are similar to the ones I tried on.
Hmmm....a little too sexy? These dresses are similar to the ones I tried on.
Although appropriate for some other event, not so much for a bridesmaid!
Although appropriate for some other event, not so much for a bridesmaid!

Here are some creative ways to ask your bridesmaids to be in your wedding:

1. What I did:

My mom and I went to the tackiest dress store we could find and took pictures of me in 1) a bright purple cutout dress, 2) a pale purple Cinderella dress and 3) another hideous and low cut dress. I then put together a package of a cute monogrammed notepad, a pen and a poem that I wrote asking them all to be in the wedding and asked them to chose between the 3 dresses... the responses were HILARIOUS. Then I let them in on the joke and they laughed their butts off. (By the way, one of my lifelong friends took me seriously and sat me down to see if this was what I really wanted!!! Priceless!!!!)

2. A package with champagne, a note asking them to be in the wedding and a glass to cheers with you! This would be a great idea to invite your girls over for a girl's night before you either go out or even if you are staying in. Plan to toast to all of them and the wedding planning ahead. This is a great opportunity to tell them all how much they mean to you in person.

3. A champagne bottle with a sweet note. You certainly cannot go wrong here! You can even pick a champagne bottle that has a label the color of your dresses (or make one for it) and tell them that is the color that you have chosen.

4. Printed invitations. There are so many creative ideas out there. Invitationbox.com is just one of the many sites that will help you find the words to ask your bridesmaids to share in the most special time of your life!

5. Personalized invitation box. Is there a favorite color, item, hobby or characteristic about your friend that makes them stand out? Then include this in some way in an invitation box of pictures and treasures.

6. Frame your favorite picture of you and your bridesmaid to be, attach a note and send! If you have a friend that you have known forever, include a photo of the two of you from when your were younger. It will bring you both back to the times when you were pretending to get married- who played the groom again? You can also put a funny photo that you have of the two of you to bring up a memory of all of the good times you have shared- have you lost some? Look back in your old facebook pictures!

Here are a few funny bridesmaids for your laugh of the day.

This girl is awesome! The last time a groom has the upper hand!

OMG I am sooo happy for you guys!!!!

All the single ladies! Maybe your girls will dance for you too- I especially liked the guys contribution!

Comments

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    • mpoche4 profile image
      Author

      Michal 5 years ago from Baton Rouge, LA

      Thank you, ShepherdLover! I am glad that you had a chance to stop by!

    • ShepherdLover profile image

      ShepherdLover 5 years ago from Portland, OR

      Great advice...and I loved all of the videos!

    • mpoche4 profile image
      Author

      Michal 5 years ago from Baton Rouge, LA

      jimsmillions- I am glad that you enjoyed this hub! Leaving the decision up to the bridesmaids can go really well or really wrong I am sure. A friend of mine picked a fabric color and let us pick the style which is nice though. Some of us are bigger and smaller in certain areas and we were able to pick something that most flattered us. I hope it works out okay for your wife!

    • mpoche4 profile image
      Author

      Michal 5 years ago from Baton Rouge, LA

      It was hilarious!!! I mailed it to each of them sinu didn't see the looks on their faces but I can just ab imagine!! The funniest thing was that the ones who believed it were the ones I have known the longest! Thanks for the vote!

    • jimsmillions profile image

      jimsmillions 5 years ago from Bristol south west england

      Some great advice that people should follow! My wife has just been invited to be a bridesmaid and I think the bride should have read this first. So many mistakes made not least letting three of the bridesmaids decide on their own dress choice. Talk about adding fuel to a fire!

      Thanks for sharing, socially shared.

    • alissaroberts profile image

      Alissa Roberts 5 years ago from Normandy, TN

      Love all these creative ways to ask your bridesmaids to be in the wedding. Of course your idea was my favorite - how funny! Would have loved to see the look on their faces when they saw those dresses! Enjoyed this one - voted up!

    • mpoche4 profile image
      Author

      Michal 5 years ago from Baton Rouge, LA

      I agree MarleneB! I wish my husband would have sung me a little Bieber!!! lol Can you imagine choreographing a dance to walk down the isle to?? I saw some of those too!

    • mpoche4 profile image
      Author

      Michal 5 years ago from Baton Rouge, LA

      Thanks, kschimmel! That was what I tried to do- keep it fun and laid back because anything can go wrong the day of your wedding. For instance- the power went out due to a wonderful Louisiana storm for the reception. It could have been the worst day ever, but someone found a second location, the band, cakes and photo booth along with about 1/3 of our guests came. It ended being the most wonderful and memorable evening that people still say was the most fun they have had at a wedding. You've gotta go with the flow... :) thanks for reading!

    • MarleneB profile image

      Marlene Bertrand 5 years ago from Northern California, USA

      Great tips. Oh, and all of the videos were awesome. I loved watching the guys dance. It made me wish I could do my wedding over just to have the wedding party dance. That would have been fun.

    • kschimmel profile image

      Kimberly Schimmel 5 years ago from North Carolina, USA

      I love the joke you played on your bridesmaids! I also appreciate your laid-back attitude, since I used to work with so many girls who came to the shop wanting the perfect this, perfect that, perfect, perfect......!!!! Life is not perfect and a wedding can be beautiful with all its imperfections--just like a marriage.