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Can a marriage survive an affair?

Updated on May 11, 2010

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Can a marriage survive an affair?

Can a marriage survive an affair?

Yes it can but two need to work at it. It is all about being able to forgive and move toward the future. It is all about forgiveness and being able to trust one another. Marriage counseling and going to a church is a must in this process. One without the other will not work. In time you will see why. The partner who has been cheated on will feel great resentment and anger. The spouse that had the affair needs to be aware that they need to be patient because the healing process and forgiveness will take time. It will not be an easy road.

Discuss the affair in counseling only. If you try and discuss it outside of counseling it will just lead into an argument. A counselor is a good mediator when discussing it and it will make it easier for the couple to talk with each other regarding it and other things. Find things that you both enjoy doing together. Bring up communication but try not to talk and bring up past issues. You want to raise the affinity with one another. If you do end up forgiving you can't keep bringing it up. Leave the past in the past and move toward the future, being stuck in it it will only lead to hate and resentment toward one another this is the number one reason why a marriage cannot survive an affair. Make a date night once a week, something you both can agree to do with one another. The number one thing to do is to start spending and enjoying each others company.

Disconnect with people that do not benefit your marriage. There needs to be boundaries to be set and agreed upon by both parties. If you both want it to work it will. Sometimes one spouse may try harder than the other. Especially the one who had the affair. The one who was cheated on may not want to work on the marriage and file for divorce. Remember this person may still be angry and hurt. My advice is to keep trying, it may take a while but over time he or she may come around. You can get back to the way you were. Do not let others influence or suppress you. They are not in the relationship, you are. Everyone has their opinions that's why I say to surround yourself with positive people. Ask yourself what do you want? You can make or change anything in your life. The trust and honesty can come back in your relationship with time and both parties working at it. Trust yourself, instead of blaming each other. Look in the mirror. Raise the affinity with one another and the communication, this is key to a successful marriage. Patience and time you will need to get through. True love is about respecting how the other feels and regaining the love and trust you once had.


Sincerely,

Sandy


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Can a marriage survive an affair

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