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Chance's First Date

Updated on July 28, 2016
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SETTING: High Cascade Snowboard Camp in the town of Government Camp, Oregon. It is summer, and a perfect time and opportunity for snowboarders to improve their tricks in the camp’s snow park on Mt. Hood’s eternal glacier. As an added perk, they get to hang out with the pros, who can now take time off from making films. About 200 campers are attending; the guys outnumber the girls by 3 to 1, and a fifth of the campers are adults.

CHARACTERS

CHANCE – Protagonist. He is a 16 year old boy whose ultimate desire is to become a professional snowboarder. Normally a risk taker who acts before thinking, he’s totally uncomfortable in this setting. He’s never been on a date.

DAMIEN – Antagonist. He too is 16 years old, physically mature for his age. His ultimate desire is also to become a professional snowboarder, but he’s actually better at football. He’s perfectly at ease. He has a girlfriend, Angela. DAMIEN is putting down CHANCE regarding dates because he is intimidated by CHANCE’S snowboarding skills, so he’s milking this one weak area.

ZYNIKER – a cranky woman in her 50s. Though she likes to pretend she is younger, her attitude towards teenagers is one of contempt.

AURORA – a woman also in her 50s, but she is physically fit and appears to be much younger. Coming from a disadvantaged background, she is overawed at being able to attend snowboard camp and be around so many pros.

DEE JAY – a male in his 20’s.

LOADS OF TEENAGE EXTRAS, BOTH BOYS AND GIRLS

SCENE: Dance hall. Actually, it’s the main room in the Main Lodge, at High Cascade Snowboard Camp. The tables, chairs, couches, and foosball machines have been pushed against the walls. At the center of the downstage wall is the DEE JAY with his sound machine and strobe lights; he is playing techno-pop music. The room is dimly lit, with flashing strobe lights. Everywhere are teenagers, both boys and girls standing around talking and not dancing. CHANCE and DAMIEN are standing STAGE LEFT, near the DEE JAY.

Wage Peace Between The Sexes (Sugar Version): A Guide to Healthy and Wholesome Sensual Relationships for Youth
Wage Peace Between The Sexes (Sugar Version): A Guide to Healthy and Wholesome Sensual Relationships for Youth

This is a Facts of Life book for kids in middle school. It covers the basics on attracting the opposite sex, positive dating ideas, avoiding and dealing with negative situations, homosexuality, birth control, stds, money management, and characteristics necessary to make a marriage succeed. Also available in ebook.

 

DAMIEN: So, where’s your date?

CHANCE: She’s coming. We agreed to meet here. Where’s yours?

DAMIEN: (arrogantly) Angela agreed to meet me here, too. I know you don’t have a girlfriend, so who did you ask?

CHANCE: (with false bravado) – I asked a grown woman.

DAMIEN: (sneering) Really?

CHANCE: Yeah. She even showed me some dance moves.

DAMIEN: Let’s see.

CHANCE: Uh – I’ll wait until she gets here.

DAMIEN: (sneering) – You didn’t ask anyone, did you?

CHANCE: (defensively) Yes I did!

DAMIEN: Then why isn’t she here?

CHANCE: Maybe for the same reason Angela’s not here.

DAMIEN: (sneering) – You’re afraid of girls, aren’t you?

CHANCE: No I’m not!

DAMIEN: Yes you are! I’ll bet you asked an adult because you figured she’d feel sorry for you and say yes to humor you, then she decided not to show up.

CHANCE: (desperately) She’ll get here! I know it!

DAMIEN: I’ll believe it when I see it.

CHANCE: “Well, how come Angela didn’t arrive with you, rather than agreeing to meet you here?

DAMIEN: She – uh – had some things to do first.

CHANCE: I’ll bet you aren’t even together anymore; I haven’t seen her with you all session.

DAMIEN: That’s because – uh – we – uh – had a little argument…

CHANCE: You guys broke up, didn’t you? That means you’re the one without a date, not me.

DAMIEN: (totally embarrassed) Well, at least I had a girlfriend unlike you. And as far as I can see, you don’t have a date, either. (Glancing towards the door) Hey, wait a minute. (with mock surprise) You know what? You’re right! You did ask a grown woman! Here she comes now! (ZYNIKER enters, wearing a ton of makeup and a leopard skin dress a size too small).

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CHANCE: (sputtering) – Uh – she’s not the one I invited.

DAMIEN: She isn’t? Are you sure?

ZYNIKER: (comes over and sneers) You call this a dance? (looks around scornfully) This scene’s deader than a doornail. Kids don’t know anything about having fun nowadays. When I was your age, all of us got out on the floor; it was like Saturday Night Fever.

DAMIEN: (gleefully) Oh, so she’s the one who showed you dance moves? Now that she’s here, you two can demonstrate!

CHANCE: (sputtering) – I – I didn’t ask her! I don’t know why she’s here!

ZYNIKER: (to CHANCE) I’ll bet you can’t dance a step.

CHANCE: (sputtering) Well – uh – (DAMIEN laughs).

ZYNIKER: Nobody here knows how to dance. I’ve seen better action in nursing homes! Though I can’t blame you guys, with this awful noise that’s supposed to pass for music. (The DEE JAY raises his eyebrows at her, then puts on a disco song.) That’s more like it! (She grabs CHANCE and starts jerking him around, in an attempt to do the Hustle. All the other kids stare at them.)

Wage Peace Between The Sexes (Spice Version): A Guide to Healthy and Wholesome Sensual Relationships for Youth
Wage Peace Between The Sexes (Spice Version): A Guide to Healthy and Wholesome Sensual Relationships for Youth

This book, for kids 16 and over, is the same as the Sugar Version, except it contains an additional chapter on sex. Also available in ebook.

 

JOE TEX: Three nights ago I was at a disco
Man, I wanted to bump, I was rarin' to go
And this big fat woman, bumped me on the floor
She was rarin' to go, that chick was rarin' to go
Man she did a dip, almost broke my hip
She was gettin' down, that chick was gettin' down
She wanted to bump some more, but I told her, no
You done knocked me down once
(At this point, ZYNIKER bumps CHANCE and both fall to the floor. EVERYONE cracks up.)
You done knocked me down once
Said, if you want to dance
Find you a big fat man
Ya'll both can get on down
Ya'll both can get on down, huh
I ain't gonna bump no more with no big fat woman
I ain't gonna bump no more with no big fat woman…

ZYNIKER: What’s your problem? You ain’t got no rhythm! (She rolls towards him in an effort to stand.)

JOE TEX: She wanted to get on down…

CHANCE: (jumping up by himself and backing away) Oh, no! (everyone laughs harder, and the DEE JAY turns up the music.

JOE TEX: I ain't gonna bump no more with no big fat woman
I ain't gonna bump no more with no big fat woman

ZYNIKER: (Finally realizing what’s being played, and that the whole room is laughing at her) I don’t care what you think! You’re all a bunch of bratty idiots, anyway! You can’t dance, and you don’t appreciate real music! I’m outta here! (She storms out. The music stops, and everyone has a good laugh. AURORA enters, wearing jeans and an LED t-shirt; her makeup is minimal.)

If You Like Sex, Read This Book!
If You Like Sex, Read This Book!

This is the adult version of "Wage Peace Between the Sexes". Beyond the basic Facts of Life, it expands on sensual living. Also available in ebook.

 
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AURORA: Wow! Looks like you’ve been having a great time here! (CHANCE, hugely relieved, rushes up to her.)

DAMIEN: (gaping with envy) Oh, you asked Aurora!

CHANCE: (triumphantly) That’s right!

AURORA: So what’s been going on?

DAMIEN: Zyniker was here a few minutes ago, and she did a disco dance with him. (jokingly) I thought she was his date.

AURORA: (to CHANCE) And how did that go?

CHANCE: (sarcastically) Fabulous. We did The Bump, and she knocked me for a loop. (EVERYONE laughes).

AURORA: You remember the line dance I taught you? The Locomotion?

CHANCE: (nervously) – Uh – I think so…

AURORA: Let’s do that one.

High School Kids Doing a Simple Line Dance

Ballroom dance lessons are available at many junior colleges and community centers. Meanwhile, here is a link that can get beginners started in country line dancing:

http://wgna.com/easy-beginner-country-line-dances/

© 2016 Ana Kolomeka

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