Before I start, I would like to make two things clear:
· Currys is the name of a firm which deals in
Computers, Electrical goods, DVD & Blue-ray, Computing, Household appliances, Cooking, Laptops, Digital cameras, Washing machines, Fridge freezers.·
Paki is not a pejorative term. It has been used a derogative term by non Asians in the United Kingdom, but it has been taken on with pride by Pakistanis (the young especially) as the word “Pak” in Urdu means “clean” so Pakistan is the Clean Country.
I, personally, being born in Pakistan, although not ethnically so, am pleased and proud when my Pakistani friends refer to me as “Paki”.
When I went down to Currys, a computer to buy,
A most lovely Paki assistant came by
"Can I help you, Sir?" I heard him exclaim
And I saw on his shirt that Samir was his name.
"Well, I tell you, Samir," I answered the lad,
"I'd like a computer, but not one I've had.
So don't show me Compaq, and don't show me Dell
And Samsung and Sony can both go to Hell".
So he showed me a Hewlett and a Packard and Smart
And he showed me the outsides and every small part
And a Toshiba Laptop and Daewoo and Bull
And an IBM something till my senses were full
Of the words and the jargon and the technical terms
And the insides looked like bundles of worms
Or like coloured string or piles of spaghetti
"It's the latest PC," he said, "from Olivetti."
But by now I'd decided in my poor muddled mind,
I didn't want a computer… not any kind.
"I'm sorry," I said. "Please don't show any more"
And turning around, I made straight for the door.
"Well, instead" cried the boy, “would you like me to show
You a Tom-Tom to show you just where to go,
When driving your car, you've perhaps lost your way;
Or a lovely alarm clock to start off your day;
Or an LCD TV a full metre wide
With DVD and Digibox already inside".
I said "No" to them all, and he looked quite unsteady
"It's no good," I said, "I've got all those already"
He now looked quite desperate at the loss of a sale
And I saw, 'neath his tan he looked really quite pale.
When he'd first came up to me, a Grade 7 or 8;
He now resembled a 4. He looked almost white.
"Or perhaps if I showed you some nice mobile 'phones
Would be nice; or perhaps, some compassionate bones"
I said, "Samir, my young friend, you may be appalled
But my compassionate bones are already installed”.
“But perhaps, if you’d like, let me buy you a coffee,
With a pie you might like, either plum or banoffee”.
He accepted, and as this happy tale ends,
Samir and I, now, are the firmest of friends.