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Consider The Younger Man

Updated on July 28, 2013

Is it wise for a women of the 21st century to be with a younger man? It is certainly becoming more and more prevalent as women claim stronger positioning in today’s society. We are occupying more powerful positions than ever before and making more money. We are finding ways to look younger and live longer than the generations before us, so why not be with a younger man?

Men have traditionally chosen younger women. If you have read any of Jane Austin’s Regency Romances, you know that she often couples a man in his late thirties with a worman who is just barely 18. Women were considered “on the shelf” at twenty-six. Today a turn in direction has made it commonplace for a young fellow in his twenties to become attracted to a woman of thirty or forty. Let’s investigate why this occurs.

The mature modern woman takes great care of herself…her hair, nails, skin are always in a state of perfection. Her fashion sense has awakened, she dresses appropriately and chooses colors and styles that compliment her particular features. She smells wonderful too, using only the best cosmetics and toiletries. She has her own money and her home is organized and reflects her style, interests and personality. Because of life experience, her conversation is never boring but fascinating. She has developed artful skills like playing an instrument, singing, painting or drawing. She is stronger and shapelier because of years spent working out in the gym. She is sexy in a demure way so that attracting younger men may not be something that she seeks, it just happens.

When it happens that a younger man pursues an older woman, what prompts her to participate. Women mature faster than men do and often do not learn to relax and have fun. The younger man offers an attitude of play and fun that the older man does not. A young man is more apt to show affection by action rather than words. He more appreciates home cooking and thoughtful gestures because younger women he’s befriended, generally do not cook and may be quite selfish.

So ladies, consider the possibility of being with a younger man. To help you sort things out the following table gives some pros and cons of embarking on this type of a relationship.

He has great energy and likes to dance.
You may not like all the same music.
He is physical and affectionate.
You may become embarrassed in public.
He appreciates home cooking.
You may be cooking more often.
He is inquisitive.
You most likely may have to share everything.
He appreciates gifts and fashion advice.
You may have to buy him clothes.
He publicly defends and champions you.
You may experience unpleasant warnings from your friends.
He is quite sensitive.
You may need to guard against hurting his feelings.
He may make you laugh more.
He may make you feel younger.
He may require sex more often.
He may really love you and stay forever.


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    • Frannie Dee profile imageAUTHOR

      Frannie Dee 

      7 years ago from Chicago Northwest Suburb

      Ghost32 Gosh, just think your mom was a cougar before it was cool! Thank you for sharing.

    • profile image


      7 years ago

      Great Hub, and a comment to WillStarr: "Almost" never, perhaps, but my mother was 9 years older than my father (and outlived him by 5 years--they had a 52 year marriage before he died).

      I agree re Demi Moore, but then again, Bruce Willis isn't still with her, either.

      It is of course true that were I NOW dating (which Pam would clearly not appreciate), I'd probably not be drawn to a lady 20 years my senior. (I turn 68 shortly; you do the math.)

    • Frannie Dee profile imageAUTHOR

      Frannie Dee 

      7 years ago from Chicago Northwest Suburb

      Denise, so far so good, keeping my fingers crossed.

    • Denise Handlon profile image

      Denise Handlon 

      7 years ago from North Carolina

      Interesting hub. I'm on the lines of 'caution' when it comes to an age difference...I'm glad yours turned out to be a positive exception.

    • Frannie Dee profile imageAUTHOR

      Frannie Dee 

      7 years ago from Chicago Northwest Suburb

      Thanks for commenting Hypenbird and I agree it's just a number.

    • Hyphenbird profile image

      Brenda Barnes 

      7 years ago from America-Broken But Still Beautiful

      Many years ago I had a "relationship" with a man w=much younger. It turned out to be totally physical as I got bored very quickly. I am not one to say no though. A special man is not held to a certain age. Interesting Hub my friend.

    • Frannie Dee profile imageAUTHOR

      Frannie Dee 

      7 years ago from Chicago Northwest Suburb

      Thanks for commenting Sunshine...there's always hope!

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 

      7 years ago from Orlando, FL

      Hi Frannie...great hub! Will share with my single friends who will appreciate the information :))

    • Frannie Dee profile imageAUTHOR

      Frannie Dee 

      7 years ago from Chicago Northwest Suburb

      Alastar good advice, thanks for commenting.

      Dester, very true, money unfortunately often rules. Thanks for your good wishes!

    • Dexter Yarbrough profile image

      Dexter Yarbrough 

      7 years ago from United States

      I think it is great when an older woman finds a younger man. In terms of having to worry about "him" being in it for the money, there have been countless times when "she" has only been in the relationship for the money. Men and women have to be careful. Period.

      Great hub and I am so happy that your relationship with a younger man is working out!

    • Alastar Packer profile image

      Alastar Packer 

      7 years ago from North Carolina

      Quite a few men now-a-days actually prefer an older woman for all the reasons you've got on here Frannie. Your pros and cons are uniquely interesting. "May have to buy him clothes" and " You may be cooking more often" bring a chuckle I must say. Agree with 90% here. One little bit of advice here for the older lady: Whatever else you do, make absolutely sure the younger guy likes your perfume; he may not care for it at all but doesn't want to hurt your feelings.~;)

    • Frannie Dee profile imageAUTHOR

      Frannie Dee 

      7 years ago from Chicago Northwest Suburb

      Thank you for commenting WillStarr. That is an unfortunate story and it is true some younger men are in it for the money. But I'm happy to report that there are more and more exceptions. My husband and I have been together for over 20 years and he's 10 years younger than I. Maybe that is why I'm optimistic. Also to give hope to those "over 30" who find men their own age look to younger woman.

    • WillStarr profile image


      7 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

      Unfortunately, younger men almost always never seek out older women for healthy, honest reasons, as a close friend has discovered more than once. It has cost her thousands in cash, and even more in heartbreak.

      Just ask Demi Moore about younger men.

      My friend has finally realized that the price of having a young lover is more than she is willing to pay. She now has a man her own age.


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