- Gender and Relationships
Dating in Saudi Arabia KSA; How to Date Muslim Saudi Girls
Dating girls in Saudi Arabia
This Hub about dating in Saudi Arabia (KSA) is very much aimed at the men working in Saudi Arabia who want to date Muslim Saudi girls and women of other nationalities. This is aimed at helping them to find a woman here in the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia (KSA) and contains lots of advice and stories given to me by others here in the kingdom – not my own experiences I promise (my wife would kill me). Therefore the stories may be exaggerated or complete fiction – or maybe they are totally true, I will let you be the judge!
If you are female and wish to date a man then I am sure the advice here could be applied equally as well, but please be aware that where some men may just be slapped on the wrist if found doing something they should not; it is likely that your punishment would be severe. You could easily find yourself in prison locked up for deportation with lashes to endure every Friday for your sentence. Most women found in the company of men, especially foreign women from less wealthy countries will be charged with prostitution and jailed accordingly before being deported from the kingdom. If you are deported for these reasons, you will find that they will stamp prostitute in Arabic in your passport. If you are a married woman, just don't take the risk of losing your head over some young handsome man.
But that aside, it is not impossible to go on dates in KSA and meet some very lovely women here, after all I met my wife in the kingdom where she had worked for ten years as a nurse. You can also meet girls that will happily spend time with you for a few hundred riyals. Have fun whilst dating women and Muslim Saudi girls in Saudi Arabia, but stay very safe at all times.
Finding Love in Saudi Arabia
More about Saudi Segregation Laws
You may wish to find out more about the various rules and regulations that are enforced in Saudi Arabia, follow this link to discover more about Saudi Rules.
The Rules of Dating in Saudi Arabia
Dating in Saudi Arabia can be quite difficult, as you are aware, you can only be alone with a woman if she is your wife or direct blood relative (sister, mother, daughter) therefore mixing with women is very difficult in the open unless you have nerves of steel and very lucky!
If you are caught with a woman who is not your sister, mother, daughter or wife you are going to be in big trouble, she in even worse! You can very easily be arrested for this offense and if any lewdness is alleged you could be finding yourself spending some serious time in jail or worse!
Should the woman be married and Adultery is alleged the penalty is death, although this is usually applied only to the woman! Should you actually be sentenced to death by stoning for this offense, you will only be buried to the waist, should you be able to escape then you are free, women are buried to the neck, but can also win their freedom by escaping! This is probably not the best ending to a romantic date in Saudi Arabia!
Saudi Arabia, the Place to Date Saudi Girls
What is like on a western compound
If you want to know more about finding a western compound and what life is really like you can follow this link to discover more about Saudi Compound life.
Finding Love on a Compound in Saudi Arabia
Most westerners living on the compounds can have the opportunities to meet ladies within the confines of the compounds, however, unless your compound is a particularly social one with many guests arriving your choices are generally restricted to the wives and daughters of other residents as I have only met one female resident who was “single”, her husband was in Australia. You are also not going to be dating Saudi Girls as they will not be allowed on to the compounds to socialize with you!
Most single women or women living in Saudi Arabia without their husbands will be housed in female only compounds or villas and will find their movements severely restricted; often with a curfew by which they have to be home.
Chasing other residents wives and daughters can be a recipe for disaster and I would suggest that you avoid this route, no matter how desperate your situation may be. This does happen frequently and at times very messily, with one man that I knew disappearing without trace!
If your compound is a fairly social one, then you may find that there are nurses and the like invited as guests to various events, more often than not Filipino although occasionally other nationalities. Depending on your morals and motivation, true love vs release, I am told (just told I promise) that many of these women are as frustrated as the men. They are as in need of a date in Saudi Arabia as you are in most cases!
The other options come in the guise of maids that offer freelance work such as cleaning across the compounds, most compounds try to keep them out as strictly they are illegal, however they seem to be able to persuade the male guards to let them in somehow! These occasionally offer services other than just scrubbing your pipework!
The maids and other female workers officially employed in the compound may also be a source of companionship, this may be easy or difficult depending on the compound management, one I stayed on had all female workers locked up safely by 7pm every night for their own protection.
However, do not take liberties or force yourself on them, these girls may come from poor countries and work in underpaid jobs, but they are not all going to accept a little extra pay to help you out and don’t assume that because one will they all will!
Don’t get yourself in trouble, a “friend” of mine ended up “dating” the mistress of the compound manager, this caused all sorts of problems when it was discovered as these things often are – moving on to another he then found that she also was the mistress of the compound manager! I am now looking for a job as a compound manager if anyone knows of any openings!
Dating Via Bluetooth in KSA
Finding Saudi Girls to date off compound in Saudi Arabia
Off compound in Saudi Arabia, if you are a westerner, you will often get smiles and little glances from ladies of many different nationalities, don’t think that these ladies, again often from poor countries, have fallen in love with your potbelly, untrimmed nasal hair and warts, they know that westerners are generally well paid and desperate!
Carefully passing on your phone number without being observed is the order of the day here, being six feet tall and handsome of course I have occasionally even had ladies secretly pass me their numbers – not that I ever used them! (Or the number).
Ladies will happily chat with you and flirt very naughtily on the phone with you, obviously if you want to chat more with them it would be best to send them a small amount of load (phone credit) maybe 50 or 100 riyals, you don’t want to appear cheap after all. This applies to ladies of all nationalities (and ages - remember many are veiled when they pass their number so you never quite know what you are getting into!)
A cute girl I know used be passed numbers frequently by men everywhere she went and talked to them all, she made an additional 4000SAR per month selling the load she received to her friends and others, when you consider wage was only 1000SAR as a cleaner on a compound this is quite significant, and she never had to meet a guy ever!
You may also receive random phone calls, more often than not men; people here seem to dial random numbers in the hope of chatting to someone interesting, I had one girl that kept phoning me for up to 10 minutes or more at a time, she would speak a little (very poor English) then start making all sorts of strange noises, what she was doing I am not sure as I had a very sheltered upbringing!
This is the hard bit – meeting the woman! If you are alone, how do you get the woman to meet you for a date in Saudi Arabia?
Dream girl in Saudi Arabia?
Meeting a Girl in Saudi Arabia
You can be brave and take risks, many people do when dating girls in Saudi Arabia! It is actually quite rare for a westerner to be stopped and challenged about the woman he is with, although it does happen. But be sensible, you are a westerner, being accompanied by a fully veiled woman will raise a few suspicions, best for whoever you take out on a date in KSA to behave in a western manner even if not western, so no veils and uncovered hair.
A westerner walking with a Filipino or Indonesian girl will attract quite a few stares, especially in Riyadh, which is far more conservative than other cities. This can be uncomfortable for the woman and there is the potential for someone to say something. Many Arabic women look quite western so there are fewer stares, but they are harder to date (I'm told!)
Going out to dinner or a walk around the mall and a quiet, romantic coffee can be achieved, but little else, getting a room is quite difficult, requiring your ID and so on! The hotel is not going to turn a blind eye to you bringing a woman to your room I promise you! I do know one hotel in Riyadh where you can get from the parking to the rooms without being seen going through the lobby - if you need to know just message me.
Should Muslim women even cover their eyes!
Bringing girls on compound to date in Saudi Arabia.
If you are on a smaller compound and are on good terms with the gate guards then you may be ok, keep them happy with regular tips for good service and so on and your life will be full and joyous. But look out for the national guard, they may report the compound guard even if they say nothing about you!
The normal routine when someone comes onto the compound is for their ID to be taken and it will be faxed with your name to the ministry of "we know what you are doing" for them to keep tabs on you. The compound will not let a single lady in to see you as they are looking out for your morals and your eternal soul! So unless you have an arrangement as all ready stated, don't do it!
The other option is if you are friendly with a married couple who are happy to chaperone your trips and liaisons, this is by far the safest manner of dating in Saudi! But most married couples are unlikely to facilitate meaningful overnight relationships!
You may also be lucky enough to know someone on the compound who regularly invites single girls to parties or other events at their home, my wife and I always had several single girls at our place every weekend, so many of the guys wanted to be my friend!
Bringing Girls home in Saudi Arabia
Bringing girls home for dating off compound in Saudi Arabia
Living off compound can be easier if you want to date girls in Saudi Arabia, you have no guards preventing you from bringing anyone to your premises. However, there are eyes everywhere, a “friend” who lives off compound was stopped by a group of guys belonging to the mosque nearby and questioned about the number of Filipino ladies seen coming in and out of the apartment building that he lived in, who were obviously visiting me (whoops cat out of the bag). However, this was not actually the case, 6 nurses had been lodged in one of the apartments temporarily by a nearby hospital – but this did not stop the very rapid spread of rumors and my apprehension by the concerned members of the community, people are very quick to assume the worst.
Bunny Boilers in Saudi Arabia
Some of the women here are very protective of their men, after all they show status and can be a very handy additional income. A friend met and had a sexual relationship with an Indonesian lady that he met at a nearby mall, he also met one of her friends who flirted with him and he made it clear that he was interested. The first girl was kidnapped and acid poured on her face to scar her so that my friend would no longer be interested in her! The second freely admitting that she had done it and stalking the man to the point where he had to move.
The same man having not learnt his lesson the first time got involved with another group of women, again Indonesian, again finding yet another stalker who had a rival kidnapped and gang raped after the man refused to see her as he preferred the other woman! Beware, there are some crazy women out there, be very careful who you date in Saudi Arabia.
Islamic Disco - Dressed to kill
Matchmaking in Saudi Arabia
By far the safest way of meeting and dating a woman in Saudi Arabia is through matchmaking, another couple introducing you and chaperoning everything that you do. If you are looking for a meaningful relationship then this is the best way forward. However, not always the best way if you are looking for a little release!
If you want to know more about Saudi women and living and working in the kingdom as a woman then have a look at this article about women in Saudi Arabia.
Living with a woman in Saudi Arabia.
If you want to live with a woman then there is a very quick and easy way to do so, convert to become a Muslim and “marry” her, there are different “levels” of marriage so you can have a marriage of convenience that allows you to travel freely together with the right paperwork and then say goodbye when you leave the country! I know only one westerner that has taken this route, but it is very common with other nationalities – especially the ones that are already Muslim.
On compound it could be possible to have a maid "living" with you, however, this is best kept very quiet as you never know who may say something to the wrong person. All it takes is a shortage of housing and someone that knows you are living illegally that wants to find a quick way to generate a vacancy!
Taking Girls to date in private places in Saudi Arabia for dating
It is possible to hire some nice villas with pools that are completely private which are ideal for small parties, in fact some even have smaller areas without pools that can be rented out on an hourly basis for very tired travelers! If you wanted to know how to find one of these then you could always drop me a line and I could pass you on to a few friends of mine.
Some of these places are less "religious" about checking your ID and so on so can be used for liaisons, however many will ask for ID, going straight to the guard with a nice tip can very often alleviate this problem.
These are ideal places for taking nice Saudi Girls to date in Saudi Arabia, especially if you are not looking for long term love in the kingdom!
Final word of warning about dating girls in Saudi Arabia
It is not allowed! Don't get caught dating girls in Saudi Arabia, especially don't get caught dating Saudi girls in Saudi Arabia! Saudi girls can look very cute, but if you are caught with one as a foreigner, you are going to be in really hot water.
If you are the nervous type on a date in Saudi Arabia or the woman with you is, you will stand out like a sore thumb if you go out in public, if you walk and act as if you own the place no one will confront you!
I have never been stopped in public with a woman (my wife), however, I get a lot of stares and comments, mainly from other women. I have been stopped at checkpoints, but I have always been waved on when they realize that I don't speak any Arabic (my wife is fluent) without my ID being checked. Most of the police would rather victimize an Indian or a Filipino who will not fight back than a loud mouthed westerner.
The wisdom contained above is the work of many of my friends who have dated many women in Saudi Arabia and has been passed to me as being accurate, it is not my own experience - honestly! (My wife would kill me.) So if you want to date Saudi girls or other women in Saudi Arabia just be very careful indeed.
A final Word on Meeting Women in Saudi Arabia
There are around 8 million expats in Saudi Arabia, the majority of which are male so you can imagine this makes for a lot of very frustrated men. Dating however, is just one aspect of being in the kingdom that many find difficult. You can read more about being an expatriate in Saudi Arabia by following this link: Expatriate in KSA.
Feel free to leave any comments or questions that you have in the section below and I will do my utmost to answer them.
Dating Girls in Saudi Arabia, a final warning.
This hub is part of a series of hubs about being an expat in Saudi Arabia (you can find out more by clicking that link!) Dating in Saudi Arabia or even just being alone with someone of the opposite sex can be very risky and could lose you your job, your liberty and any benefits you may have accrued through your employment.
Be very careful indeed as to what you are risking to chase women (or men) within Saudi Arabia. Maybe you will find true love dating in Saudi Arabia, or maybe you will find yourself losing everything for a very brief liaison. I also do not recommend any approaches to Saudi women themselves; it is one thing being caught messing around with a Filipina maid and another thing entirely being found alone with the daughter of the chief of police's third cousin!
Dating in Saudi Arabia is a risk, if you can stay on the compounds or be in the company of a married couple who can chaperone you it is far safer. But if you want to take risks and take a nice Saudi girl out be very careful indeed.