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Dating: Should Someone Be Suspicious If Another Person Acts Extremely Interested In The Beginning?

Updated on September 20, 2018

Dating: Should Someone Be Suspicious If Another Person Acts Extremely Interested In The Beginning?

Dating: Should Someone Be Suspicious If Another Person Acts Extremely Interested In The Beginning?


If someone was to come across a dog, and this dog was to jump up and down, making it clear that he/she was pleased to see them, there would be no reason for them to wonder what was going on. This is due to the fact that this just what dogs are like; they don't need a reason to be warm and responsive.

However, if they were to come across another human being who behaved in this way, there would probably be a reason for it. Now, there is always the chance that this person is a close friend.

Perfectly Normal

Therefore, the reason why they have behaved in this way is because they know who they are and they value them as a person. The way in which this person will behave towards them is then the result of what has taken place between them over the weeks, months, and even years that they have known them for.

When they met one for the first time, they may have been polite but they might not have been as friendly as they are now. It could then be said that one had to earn the other persons trust and respect before they could be treated in this way.

The Main Difference

One way of looking at this would be to say that human beings have to be more discerning that dogs. If they were to simply embrace everyone in the same way and allowed anyone into their life, it would lead to problems.

This doesn't mean that they can't be polite, though, what it comes down to is that in order for them to look after their own wellbeing they need to find out what someone is like. Not only this, dogs are generally dependent on human beings for their own survival, whereas human beings are not dependent in most cases.

Another Area

Bearing this in mind, if someone was to come across another person who not only made it clear that they were attracted to them, but was practically all over them, it could show that something isn't right. Said another way, this could be what is often described as a 'red flag' in the dating world.

The other person is not going to know a great deal about them, yet they will act as though they are in love with them. It can be as if they have been in a relationship for a number of months even though they have only just met.

From The Outside

If another person was to catch a glimpse of what is taking place, they may believe that these two people are actually together. It might just appear as though one person is more interested than the other.

One of them will be laid back; while the other will have a greater attachment. If they were to find out that these people know very little about each other and what their values are, for instance, they could be surprised.

A Level Head

If one was to come across someone who behaved in this manner, they might get a sense that something isn't right. They might not be able to pinpoint exactly why this is, but what will be clear is that they feel uncomfortable.

Being around someone who is touchy-feely and who gives them a lot of positive feedback might be pleasant, but it won't sit right with them. What this can then show is that they are fairly secure within themselves.

Abnormal

For one thing, they won't have earned this kind of behaviour, and, as the other person won't know much about them, there is going to be no reason for them to be so interested. If one was famous this kind of behaviour would make more sense, as this person would have a better idea about who they are.

Even so, even if one had been in different films, for instance, it still wouldn't mean that the other person would know what they are like as a person - beyond the roles that they have played. What this would show is that they are projecting a lot onto them, making it hard for them to connect to them as a real human being.

Emotionally Undeveloped

Someone like this is then unlikely to feel like a whole human being, and this is going to cause them to look toward certain people to complete them. Acting in a seductive manner is then going to be a way for them to pull someone into their life, thereby allowing them to feel whole.

In this case, someone is likely to see another person as a mother or father figure, not as an individual in their own right. On the outside, then, they might look like an adult, but deep down, they will probably feel like a needy child.

A Vulnerable Position

However, although someone who is in a good place is likely to be repelled by someone like this, there are going to be others who aren't. Consequently, if someone is in a low place and is feeling very needy, for whatever reason, they can end up falling for this behaviour.

It can feel as though they are the centre of the universe in the beginning but, after a little while, the other person could discard them and find someone else. At one point they will be on one side of the emotional spectrum, feeling really good and even special, and, at another, they will be on the other side, feeling really low and worthless.

Awareness

It might become clear that it was not that the other person really liked them; it was just that they needed someone to make them feel better. This person was not looking for love - and if they were, they would have taken the time to get to know them.

This will have caused one to experience a lot of pain, but on the plus side, they will know what to look for in the future. If this is something that has happened to them on more than one occasion, it may be a sign that they don't feel whole and complete.

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    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 

      2 months ago

      It's not uncommon for someone to be extremely interested in the beginning. The "infatuation phase" affects people differently.

      However if one person is considered a "10" or is semi famous and well admired by many it wouldn't be a shock if an "average" person found his/herself tripping all over them self over having an opportunity to be with them.

      On the other hand there are some "players" whose (modus operandi) is to shower prospective mates with loads of attention, compliments, gifts, expensive dinners/outings in order to win them over. Inexperienced daters believe they've met their "soulmate"!

      Once there is an emotional investment or commitment established they reveal their "authentic selves". It's almost a cliché to hear:

      "He/she is not the same person I fell in love with."

      Most experienced daters understand the "infatuation phase" of a new relationship should not lead to making any assumptions. Enjoy it for what it is but you really don't get to know someone until after you've had a major disagreement or misunderstanding.

      As important as compatibility is it's really our differences, boundaries, and "deal breakers" that determine if someone is right for us. It takes (time) to truly get to (know) a person.

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