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Did I Find True Love?

Updated on June 19, 2013

How to Know If You Found “The One”

Everyone is looking for love, but not everyone finds it right away. We all have to kiss many frogs before one turns into our prince. We all have to go through relationships that may seem to waste our time and love, but without failed relationships we would never have the knowledge of what a successful and happy relationship feels and looks like. Once we find a good partner in life it is only natural to question our decision: is this the one? Is there something else out there for me? Should I settle down? Questions flood our minds because we played with fire too much in our lives that we have been left burnt, scared, fearful, and alone. We fear that once we give our heart to someone they will just shred it into a million pieces like everyone else before. Questioning our life decisions is completely normal and natural, but there are many questions that we can ask and answer for ourselves to put our minds at ease and to make us realize the reality of our choice in our life partner.

Have you actually found the one?

Does this Person Allow You to be You?

The first sign that this person may be your true love that you could potentially spend the rest of your life with, is that this person allows you to be you, they do not wish to change you and mold you into the person they believe you should be. Instead they love you for everything that you are and have to offer; they love your flaws, your mistakes, your ups, downs, and twists and turns. This person accepts that you will make mistakes in life, and instead of running for the greener grass that may be on the other side, they stay to water their dying grass and nurse it back to better and greener days. They take the time to work with you and form better boundaries. They do not get angry, but grow concerned and help you learn. They accept you, they love you, they want you in their lives because you make it better for them, and all of your quirks, flaws, smile, laughter, and touch makes their lives interesting and euphoric.

Does This Person Make You Feel Comfortable?

Can you sit on the couch cuddling for hours? Can you walk into a room and feel immediately at home no matter where you are just because they are there? Does this person make you feel at ease just because they are standing by your side? If you feel comfortable in every situation because you have this person next to you, that is a clear sign that you have found a good partner in life. If you can lay on the couch with this person by your side, and you feel like you could melt into each other and never need to move again, you may have just found the person you are meant to spend the rest of your life. If you can feel comfortable together when you are young then you will feel comfortable together when you are old (that is the dream at least).


Does this Person Hold Your Hand?

Another clear sign that this person may be “the one” is that they hold your hand. This simple gesture can make anyone feel loved, wanted and needed. If they hold your hand, and your fingers become laced, and you never want to let go, that is a clear sign that you may love this person enough for a long term relationship. If this person desires to hold your hand everyday, in public and in private, it is a good sign that this person also wishes to be with you for the long term.

Does This Person Hug You When You Cry?

When you feel sad, and nothing seems to be getting better in life, does this person hold you when you cry? Does this person give you a steady and strong shoulder to cry on? If this person holds you and allows you to vent about your life's problems without saying anything negative in return, it could be a sign that this person truly loves and cares for you, and willing to put their own pride aside and take on your issues for a moment, and may even try to help you figure out the route of your problems before carrying on with what they had planned to do for the rest of their day.

Does This Person Tell You They Love You Everyday?

On your good days, your bad days, and your iffy days, does this person tell you they love you and kiss you on your forehead or your cheek? Do they tell you that they love you just because they do (not because they are looking for something in return)? If this person tells you that they love you just simply to put a smile on your face, and to hear the words out loud, it is a clear sign that it is true love, and you may have just found the one to spend the rest of your days with.

Does This Person Make You Smile When You Are Mad?

Even though you love this person with your whole heart and you desire to spend every waking moment with them, they can light a fury deep within you, making you explode into a fire ball of anger, but can they also make you smile and laugh amidst your fury? Can they immediately make you forget why you were mad in the first place with all of the goofy quirks, jokes, and personality?

Does This Person Help You Grow?

Another clear sign that this person truly cares enough to be with you for a long period of time is that they aid you in your personal growth. When this person sees you struggle in your life it hurts them, and they grow concerned (but not judgmental) and they will not stop until you have reached a steady path on the mountain of life. Their only desire when they see you struggle is to watch you succeed, smile, and be gleeful. They want nothing less than the best for you.

Does This Person Know When to Give You Space?

Space is an important requirement to allow the heart to grow fonder and to work on yourself as an individual, so it is extremely important to know when your significant other needs space to breathe on their own. Everyone needs a little space sometimes, and your partner in life should never make you feel guilty for that desire, but instead they should encourage you to take some space when you are feeling it to be necessary for both yourself and your relationship. If this person knows when to give you the much needed air to gather yourself together, that person obviously loves you and trusts you, and wants to provide you with everything that you want and need.

Does This Person Bring You More Happiness Than You Originally Though Possible?

Pure joy, elation and happiness is by far the most crucial ingredient to cook up the perfect long term relationship that lasts a lifetime. Without this ingredient the relationship will cool and become flat; without happiness, your love can not rise, and it will end up leaving a bitter taste in your mouth. If this person leaves you feeling happier than you have ever felt, if this person helps you bake your love cake with sweet sugar, they may be the person of your dreams, that have finally come into your reality, pinch yourself all you want, this is love is real.

If You Think You Have Found it, Hold on to it Tightly

Finding true love is one of the most difficult aspects of life, but if you have answered yes to all of these questions you may just have found the right person to share your life with. If you think you have found “the one” hold on to that person tightly (but do not suffocate them). Hold on to this person even through the hardships and difficulties in life. If you can get drive through the bumpy roads with little damage, keep driving to find the steady roads so that the both of you can have the beautiful and bright future that you deserve with the person you love most.

True love lasts a lifetime. If you have finally found the one who makes you smile above all else, hold on to that person tightly.
True love lasts a lifetime. If you have finally found the one who makes you smile above all else, hold on to that person tightly. | Source

One Last Thought

Remember, the small things in life is what truly matters in your life and personal relationship. You can lose a home. You can lose money. You can lose anything, but if you have love in your life, you already have everything.

Let's Take a Poll!

Do you believe you have found true love?

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    • Danext profile image

      Dan Lema 

      4 years ago from Tanzania

      Very interesting hub JamiJay, i completely agree with you on the above points...such useful tips, thanks....

    • phdast7 profile image

      Theresa Ast 

      5 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

      Jami - This is so well written and full of truth, standards by which we can and should measure our relationships. I wish I had read and followed this many. many years ago when I was young and rather emotionally stupid. Great Hub. :) Sharing.

    • AmandaJon profile image

      Amanda Jones 

      5 years ago

      Hi JamiJay! Excellent hub, you highlighted great points, only your heart knows, if you found the right person.

      Useful and interesting!

    • JamiJay profile imageAUTHOR

      Jami Johnson 

      5 years ago from Somewhere amongst the trees in Vermont.

      pinto2011, I also believe one should love strong enough so that everyone desires the same. Shout it out, own it, and prove it everyday :) thank you for reading and commenting.

    • JamiJay profile imageAUTHOR

      Jami Johnson 

      5 years ago from Somewhere amongst the trees in Vermont.

      Bill, thank you, and yes, we must hold on to our true loves :) I hope you have a great weekend as well, mine will be busy, but I will enjoy every second of it.

    • pinto2011 profile image


      5 years ago from New Delhi, India

      Hi JamiJay! I like all the checklist you have created to assess this beautiful feeling. I personally believe that love your beloved to the extent that the whole world turns to pray for your feelings.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 

      5 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Jami, I don't think there is a thing I can add to this beautiful hub. You have said it all. If you find a person like that, as you and I have, then you better hold on tight and do everything in your power to never lose them. Well done my friend, and have a great weekend.


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