Divorce and remarriage. Is it really adultary?
The real institution of marriage
Let us take a brief look on the first marriage. Adam and Eve were the first married couple mentioned in the bible. They were the first to receive the law concerning how to live as husband and wife. This is what God said to them in Genesis 2:18-25,
18 The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."
19 Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name.
20 So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field.
But for Adam no suitable helper was found.
21 So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh.
22 Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.
23 The man said,
"This is now bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called 'woman,'
for she was taken out of man."
24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
25 The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.
- We see that God understood that Adam needed a helper. A womans job is to help meet the needs of the house in every way. Woman is also God's gift to man because God knew that man couldn't do it alone.
- There is someone for everyone. There is no such thing as "I was meant to be single"or "there is no one for me" or marriage isn't for me" OR I don't do well with relationships." God caused Adam to go into a deep sleep and took his rib and created woman. For every man out there, there is a woman for you.
- When Eve was created, she was bone of Adam's bone and flesh of Adam's flesh. When we get married, we become the flesh and bone of each other. If this were not true, God wouldn't have commanded that Adam leave his father's and mother's home and cleave unto his wife so they can become one flesh.
- There shall be no secrets in marriage. The scripture says they were naked and were not ashamed. They were not ashamed of one another nor their imperfections.
Laws Concerning Marriage
7 " 'They must not marry women defiled by prostitution or divorced from their husbands, because priests are holy to their God.
8 Regard them as holy, because they offer up the food of your God. Consider them holy, because I the LORD am holy—I who make you holy.
13 " 'The woman he marries must be a virgin.
14 He must not marry a widow, a divorced woman, or a woman defiled by prostitution, but only a virgin from his own people,
15 so he will not defile his offspring among his people. I am the LORD, who makes him holy.'"
Concerning Sexual Sins
7 " 'Consecrate yourselves and be holy, because I am the LORD your God. 8 Keep my decrees and follow them. I am the LORD, who makes you holy.
9 " 'If anyone curses his father or mother, he must be put to death. He has cursed his father or his mother, and his blood will be on his own head.
10 " 'If a man commits adultery with another man's wife—with the wife of his neighbor—both the adulterer and the adulteress must be put to death.
11 " 'If a man sleeps with his father's wife, he has dishonored his father. Both the man and the woman must be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads.
12 " 'If a man sleeps with his daughter-in-law, both of them must be put to death. What they have done is a perversion; their blood will be on their own heads.
13 " 'If a man lies with a man as one lies with a woman, both of them have done what is detestable. They must be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads.
14 " 'If a man marries both a woman and her mother, it is wicked. Both he and they must be burned in the fire, so that no wickedness will be among you.
15 " 'If a man has sexual relations with an animal, he must be put to death, and you must kill the animal.
16 " 'If a woman approaches an animal to have sexual relations with it, kill both the woman and the animal. They must be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads.
17 " 'If a man marries his sister, the daughter of either his father or his mother, and they have sexual relations, it is a disgrace. They must be cut off before the eyes of their people. He has dishonored his sister and will be held responsible.
18 " 'If a man lies with a woman during her monthly period and has sexual relations with her, he has exposed the source of her flow, and she has also uncovered it. Both of them must be cut off from their people.
19 " 'Do not have sexual relations with the sister of either your mother or your father, for that would dishonor a close relative; both of you would be held responsible.
20 " 'If a man sleeps with his aunt, he has dishonored his uncle. They will be held responsible; they will die childless.
21 " 'If a man marries his brother's wife, it is an act of impurity; he has dishonored his brother. They will be childless.
22 " 'Keep all my decrees and laws and follow them, so that the land where I am bringing you to live may not vomit you out.
23 You must not live according to the customs of the nations I am going to drive out before you. Because they did all these things, I abhorred them.
24 But I said to you, "You will possess their land; I will give it to you as an inheritance, a land flowing with milk and honey." I am the LORD your God, who has set you apart from the nations.
You can explore the book of Leviticus in detail. That book is all the do's and don't concerning marriage. Please let us not forget that one of the ten commandments is, "Thou shalt not commit adultery."
Is it really a sin to get divorced?
This is a question for the ages. Many women and men of the faith often have this question especially when things are not so perfect in their marriages. It is a question that can be debated by the best theologians and marriage counselors alike. I think the question should be, ho does God really feel about divorce?
We will use a lot of biblical reference for this, so please take a minute to grab your bibles as we explore how God views marriage and divorce.
We will start with Malachi 2:11-15
11 Judah has broken faith. A detestable thing has been committed in Israel and in Jerusalem: Judah has desecrated the sanctuary the LORD loves, by marrying the daughter of a foreign god.
12 As for the man who does this, whoever he may be, may the LORD cut him off from the tents of Jacob even though he brings offerings to the LORD Almighty.
13Another thing you do: You flood the LORD's altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer pays attention to your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands.
14 You ask, "Why?" It is because the LORD is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant.
15 Has not the LORD made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth.
16 "I hate divorce," says the LORD God of Israel, "and I hate a man's covering himself with violence as well as with his garment," says the LORD Almighty.
So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith.
This passage of scripture explained when Judah decided to marry outside of their faith. Paul mentions the same thing in 2 Corinthians 6:14 when he said,
"Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?"
Paul further explains this in the case of married couples who are yoked together with unbelievers in 1 Corinthians 7:12-16
12To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her.
13And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him.
14For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
15But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.
16How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?
We can clearly see that Paul wants us to keep the peace because he knows how much God hates divorce. But God on the other hand hates divorce because it is an act of breaking a covenant. When any of us get married, we openly make a covenant with our spouse as well as God. Its one thing to break covenant with each other, but its a who other issue to break covenant with God. You see in the scripture in Malachi, the people flooded the alter with tears because they felt as though God wasn't hearing them and accepting their sacrifices.
In fact, God heard every cry. But just like us parents, when a child is crying (due to their own fault), what do we do? We let them cry and encourage them to never do it again. Some of us may even ground our children depending on the severity of the crime. Same with God, their punishment lasted over 400 years. Israel recently became an independent nation in the 1940s.
No reason is good enough for divorce other than adultery!!
I'll say this right now, if your marriage is in trouble, do not commit adultery just to get out of it. The adulterer suffers greatly because of the sin. This is what the bible says about committing adultery:
" 'If a man commits adultery with another man's wife—with the wife of his neighbor—both the adulterer and the adulteress must be put to death.
But a man who commits adultery lacks judgment; whoever does so destroys himself.
I gave faithless Israel her certificate of divorce and sent her away because of all her adulteries. Yet I saw that her unfaithful sister Judah had no fear; she also went out and committed adultery.
Because Israel's immorality mattered so little to her, she defiled the land and committed adultery with stone and wood.
"Why should I forgive you? Your children have forsaken me and sworn by gods that are not gods. I supplied all their needs, yet they committed adultery and thronged to the houses of prostitutes.
And among the prophets of Jerusalem I have seen something horrible: They commit adultery and live a lie. They strengthen the hands of evildoers, so that no one turns from his wickedness. They are all like Sodom to me; the people of Jerusalem are like Gomorrah."
I will sentence you to the punishment of women who commit adultery and who shed blood; I will bring upon you the blood vengeance of my wrath and jealous anger.
for they have committed adultery and blood is on their hands. They committed adultery with their idols; they even sacrificed their children, whom they bore to me, as food for them.
Then I said about the one worn out by adultery, 'Now let them use her as a prostitute, for that is all she is.'
But righteous men will sentence them to the punishment of women who commit adultery and shed blood, because they are adulterous and blood is on their hands.
We clearly see that out of this sin called adultery, there is a punishment for it.
Cheaper to Keep Her 1
What does Jesus say about divorce?
Jesus said in the gospels that divorce is only applicable in the case of fornication.
Fornication is voluntary sexual intercourse between a man and woman who are not married to each other. Adultery is one type of fornication.
Fornication is also mentioned many times in the New Testament (Matt. 5:32; 19:9; John 8:41; Acts 15:20, 29; 21:25; Rom. 1:29; 1 Cor 5:1, 6:13, 18, 7:2; 10:8; 2 Cor 12:21; Gal 5:19; Eph 5:3; Col 3:5; 1 Thess. 4:3; Jude 1:7; Rev. 2:14, 20-21; 9:21; 14:8; 17:2,4).
“The Greek word for ‘fornication’ (porneia) could include any sexual sin committed after the betrothal contract. …In Biblical usage, ‘fornication’ can mean any sexual congress outside monogamous marriage. It thus includes not only premarital sex, but also adultery, homosexual acts, incest, remarriage after un-Biblical divorce, and sexual acts with animals, all of which are explicitly forbidden in the law as given through Moses (Leviticus 20:10-21). Christ expanded the prohibition against adultery to include even sexual lusting (Matthew 5:28).” (Dr. Henry M. Morris) To piggyback off this statement by the Dr., porneia is also uncovering the nakedness of another person such as viewing pornography, paying for sex, and a host of other fleshly desires that are not condusive to the natural marriage.
The word “fornication” is sometimes used in a symbolic sense in the Bible, for example, meaning a forsaking of God or a following after idols (Isa. 1:2; Jer. 2:20; Ezek. 16; Hos. 1:2; 2:1-5; Jer. 3:8-9).
When I researched the term fornication these are the terms it told me to see.
- See ADULTERY
- See IDOLATRY, LICENTIOUS PRACTICES OF
- See INCEST
- See LUST
- See RAPE
- See SENSUALITY
- See SODOMY
- See WHORE
- See WHOREDOM
according to the online bible dictionary.
Jesus Exact Words
1When Jesus had finished saying these things, he left Galilee and went into the region of Judea to the other side of the Jordan.
2Large crowds followed him, and he healed them there.
3Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?"
4"Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,'
5and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh?
6So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."
7"Why then," they asked, "did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?"
8Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.
9I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery."
10The disciples said to him, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry."
11Jesus replied, "Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given.
12For some are eunuchs because they were born that way; others were made that way by men; and others have renounced marriagebecause of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it."
Cheaper to Keep Her 2
If I were to sum this whole hub up into one thought, it is absolutely a sin to divorce. It is a sin to commit adultery. It is a sin to go against the word of God period. The only way a divorce is permitted is adulery was committed. All these divorced couples divorcing for irreconcilable differences, (because they just can't get along), NOT SUITABLE FOR DIVORCE. If anyone can dispute these facts, please do leave a comment. Let us debate lovingly.