ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Does He Like Me? Male Body Language Decoded

Updated on December 28, 2012

Sweet Nothings

Words are easily diluted of all feeling. Body language however, is far harder to mask, and a far better gauge of how our prospective romantic fortunes may pan out down the road. From the direct, sustained glance, to out of character giddiness. Our body makes shameless fools of us all (yet endearing ones). And men are certainly no exceptions to this rule. If anything, they (we) have a habit of being particularly emotionally translucent. The trick is becoming conscious of body language, and turn our gut-churning instincts into educated guesses.

This article amounts to a mix of research and personal experience, which I hope, will allow you to get a firmer grip on some easily noticed signals of body language attraction.

It isn't always easy to decipher body language when it comes to our own bouts of flirting!
It isn't always easy to decipher body language when it comes to our own bouts of flirting! | Source

Signs Of Interest And Attraction

Everyone differs when it comes to body language. Some of us are far more conscious of what our bodies say about us, and are thus adept at communicating subconsciously. Because of this, the best you can ever hope for is an educated guess. Despite the plethora of "you have it made" articles strewn around the web, it is better (consider this my disclaimer) to eradicate high hopes and keep expectations realistic.

We can, be fairly sure however. Recent studies on body language confirm that some behaviours are constant, especially those that denote interest and attraction. Here is a quick list of behaviours that you have his attention.

  • Look for an open posture - An open body posture subconsciously demonstrates interest and honesty. In short they are paying attention, and are happy where they are. Signs of an open posture include relaxed arms which don't cross the midsection and hug the body, legs which aren't folded, and direct yet relaxed eye contact. Be careful not to misread environmental causes (such as being cold) when assessing body language.
  • The body gravitates towards objects of interest - If, when you've initiated a conversation, you notice that his feet and torso are subtly indicating the exit, chances are, that's exactly where he wishes to go. Many facets of male body language are identical to those of their female counter-parts (there are exceptions). If his body and feet are centred on you (even if he's looking around), particularly if you are conversing in a group, chalk it up as a win in your favour.
  • Prolonged eye contact - This can be a tricky one to gauge because shy guys will seek eye contact but might be a little intimidated by sustaining it, particularly around a girl they like. As a rule of thumb judge the volume of eye contact sought over it's duration. If he is interested he'll have problems not checking back in your direction.
  • Farewell monotone - Hormone rushes and a swell of excitement are demonstrated by a conspicuous lack of monotone while conversing. In short, everything becomes a little more amazing or damning than usual. Constant variance in pitch is a subconscious weapon that aims at not losing your attention.

As discussed below, a text-book example of high levels of rapport.
As discussed below, a text-book example of high levels of rapport. | Source

Birds Of A Feather

Perhaps the most key realization when asking yourself whether he likes you is what is known in neuro-linguistic circles as rapport. In short, rapport is a superficially (although it feels entirely natural) generated feeling of being in sync.

When it comes to gauging being in "sync" with regards to body language, take a second to consider in the "now" how you are reacting to each other. In general, a healthy dose of mutual attraction and interest will lead to the following scenario:

  • You are both facing each other and your postures are eerily similar.
  • You are talking at the same pace.
  • He laughs when you do and vice versa.
  • He reciprocates gestures, casual touches and jokes.

Consider lovers and close friends, and look at how they copy each other subconsciously. Imitation, we know, is the sincerest form of flattery -- and our bodies are masters of adaptation. If you suddenly find that you're both butting heads every three seconds because you both decided to bend over at the same time chalk up another win on ye olde tally.

The Stand Up Comedian

While I briefly considered adding a section regarding so-called alpha male body signals such as the good old hands-in-pockets routine that happens to be a great way to show off the breadth of his chest and shoulders, I do happen to feel it is both outdated and illusory. Outdated because there are better, more accessible signals available to us, and illusory because it is also a masculine mechanism for self-aggrandizement and comfort.

A better signal, to me, is that of a man attempting to sound and act like a second-rate stand-up comedian. It's in his eyes, in his tone and his easy, relaxed smile. Men are subconsciously aware that humour not only makes us feel safe and less prone to volatility. It also happens to be a fantastic medium to accrue attraction, display healthy self-esteem and a great way to manifest strength of character. An all round winner which demands a great deal of energy. The kind of energy that we wouldn't expend on just about anyone.


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)