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- Relationship Problems & Advice
Don't blame the woman
Elias is a brave man.He is very helpful and takes care of other people's problems,thus,everybody loves him in the area he lives.He's a farmer and grows crops which he sells in the town's market.This activity brings him a revenue sufficient to take care of the welfare of his family.But ,there is one thing which prevents him to enjoy his life plainly.What is that thing?That's what we'll see in the following sentences.
Elias has a very beautiful wife Anna and three daughters:Maria,Amy and the youngest Anna II ,named after her mother.Elias has a friend ,Sunday with whom he goes to the farm everyday.Their farms are next to each other.Sunday has four children:three boys and one girl.Every time he doesn't miss any opportunity to mock Elias about the fact that he has not any boy.At first,he doesn't care of all this.He says to himself,"I don't mind,since I have three children,boys or girls,it doesn't matter ."Thus,whenever he hears this kind of assertion,he shrugs and passes his way.
One day,Elias met an old friend :Moutari.Moutari said to him,"oh Elias,you have no boy ,you know,in our tradition ,if a man dies and have no boy,a great part of his inheritance will go to others ,so you must react now!
-And what do you want me to do? Whose fault is it if I can't have boys?
-It is your wife's fault of course.She can't give you boys,so what I suggest you to do is to take another wife,because our religion and our customs allow you to do so.
-You're perhaps right,I'll think about it very seriously.
-Oh Elias,you know very well that I'm right,so think about what I've said.I don't advise you to give up your wife,but I insist you take another one who can give you the joy to father of nice boys.I'm sure that it will make you very happy ,you, your family and all your friends.
Since tat day,Elias is bewildered by the words he heard from Moutari.If he does not have boys,it is wife Anna's fault.It can't be anything else.Now,Elias becomes thoughtful,he does not know how to do.To take another wife?Or not to to take?If he takes another wife,he will have additional charges and will have to work more to maintain the same standard of living but he doesn't have the same strength as before.Elias has anyone to help him.Now,if he does not take another woman he will propably die without male heirs.In this case and according to the tradition ,his goods will go to his parents(i.e. father,mother,brothers...).Theywill just give a small part to his daughters and share the rest.He doesn't want this to happen.Even though Elias is not very rich,he wants to bequeath his belongings to his wife and daughters.
Elias makes up his mind to go to see one of his friends:Bacar.Bacar is a physician,he's the director of District DIspensary not far from his home.He wants to get a good advice on this matter from a reliable source,straight from the horse's mouth.Sooner said than done.After the usual greetings Elias says:"My friend,I come to see you in order to get a good advice from you.I have a big problem which prevents me to rest these days."
-What's that problem?
-Well,as you know I have three kids and all of them are girls,I don't have any boy so I decide to get married to another woman expecting to have male heir from her for the name of my family to be preserved.As you know, if I have no male heir my family's name will stop with me because women do not bear their family's name for ever,when they get married they bear their husband's name
-I understand you Bacar replied,but who told you that this situation is your wife's fault
-It can't be anything else.
- You know,I'm a physician, so let me tell you that you're responsible of this situation.
-How is it possible?
-I'll explain it.First, let me show you this passage I picked on the internet(Wikipedia the free encyclopedia) on the sex determination system which says:"In this system,females have two of the same kind of sex chromosome xx and are called the homogametic sex.Males have two distinct sex chromosomes xy and are called the heterogametic sex.Some species have a gene or genes on the y chromosome that determine maleness.I the case of humans a single gene on the y chromosome acts as a signal to set the developmental pathway towards maleness."I'll stop here not to bother you about all these scientifical terms, but what you should know is that whenever a man meets a woman the female transmits a chromosome x and the male either a chromosome x or y with one chance over two for each possibility.Thus, the result will be either xx or xy.So , female or male with one chance over two for each sex.
I think you understand the situation now states Bacar, therefore don't blame your woman blame your ownself if can't get male heirs.Elias understands everything and thanks Bacar for all explanations.If he didn't intervened he would have done wrong things.After all, he doesn't care if his children are males or females, the most important thing is for him to have descendants.
For everyone who is worrying about having only girls let me say that without women this world would never prosper, that's why Almighty God created man then woman for them to live together in peace and harmony and to this world a good place to live.GOD BLESS THE WOMAN(and man too)