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Easing Breakup Pain

Updated on December 28, 2016

Dealing With Rejection

Dealing with rejection can be quite rough, but thankfully, it can be made mercifully straightforward as long as you do not allow yourself to wallow in despair indefinitely. If you have just been recently broken up with by your ex and you want to get over this break up quickly, then you need to work on taking the right steps to ensure that you are well on your way on the road to recovery.

Learn The Psychology Behind Breakups

Therefore if you want to effectively deal with the pain of rejection after getting dumped, you need to have some knowledge of the psychology of break ups and get behind the true reason why your ex might have dumped you in the first place. All areas of human endeavor involve some form of psychology and this is why it is such a powerful study. Whether you are facing rejection in your love life, your career or a simple demand for a promotion or a salary increase, you have to know the psychology behind the rejection in order to get over it relatively quickly.

Quick tip for getting over a breakup.
Quick tip for getting over a breakup.

Fear of Rejection Hinders You

You should realize at this point that the fear of rejection is one of the most powerful and debilitating fears that a person can have. This is because getting rejected can make someone feel worthless, unwanted, insecure and quite inferior. Of course, since rejection is something that we all have to deal with at some point in our lives eventually, it is very important to have the right mindset in order to face it directly without breaking down emotionally.

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Tips For Easing Breakup Pain

There are some things that you can do in order to keep a positive mindset even in the face of rejection. It is very important to always look to the light at the end of the tunnel – to realize that there will be an end to the emotional turmoil that you are feeling right now and that no matter how painful it is, you will be able to deal with it and eventually get past it.

Here are some concrete tips for dealing with the fact that you have just been rejected:

  • Cry: Crying is one of the simplest and easiest ways that you can let out all the pent up emotions that you might have been keeping bottled up inside you since the break up. Crying is an excellent form of catharsis because it helps to release you from the emotional pain of the break up without you resorting to destructive behavior. Crying can be done on your own in a private place or you can even cry as you talk about your problems and your feelings after the break up with a trusted friend or confidant. Even professional therapists encourage “telling your story” and letting it all out instead of keeping things all to yourself.
  • Don’t equate your self-worth with this one event: Just because you failed at this area of your life, it does not mean that you are a failure at life over-all. Whether it’s your relationship, job, business or whatever aspect of your life that you have failed at or are facing rejection in, you should never think that your self-worth is defined by a single moment of failure. If you take this kind of attitude all the time, then you will be facing countless amounts of heartache and emotional pain every time that you fail at some area of your life.
  • Learn to love yourself: Even though you have just been rejected, this does not invalidate all the other things that you have already achieved with your life. Even if you feel that this is your lowest point in life, it does not mean that your life is or was ever without meaning. Even the very fact that you got rejected means that you were working hard in order to achieve something. Try to think about what positive accomplishments you have achieved so far in life and write them down on a piece of paper. Writing down your positive accomplishments on paper makes them a lot more concrete rather than just thinking about them – which you tend to easily forget. Don’t just list down your greatest achievements, try to remember the little things that you have accomplished as well – as these can sometimes be the most meaningful. For example, graduating with honors during high school, or winning a spelling competition in grammar school. Take good care of your list and remember to glance at it every once in a while in order to remind yourself that this rejection that you are dealing with is nothing compared to what you have achieved with your life so far.
  • Understand why you were rejected and become a better person for it: Do not dwell upon the pain that you are feeling from the break up. If you want to move on effectively, then you need to find out what the cause of the rejection was in the first place and what you can learn from it so that you do not repeat the mistakes that you made in the past.
  • Think of it as a stepping stone: Don’t think of the rejection as a roadblock, but instead, try to view it as a stepping stone towards bigger and better things. If your ex broke up with you, try to see it in a positive light. Perhaps you’ll meet someone out there who is a much better prospect than your ex could ever be.

Most importantly, never forget your value and worth as a person just because you got rejected. Persevere and do not give in to the pain and you will be able to move on effectively.


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