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Expert, Working Ways for You Guys to Talk Correctly to Women

Updated on January 21, 2015
This man knew how to talk to his date in the beginning
This man knew how to talk to his date in the beginning

Is talking to women easy?

You would think that for men to talk to women is one of the easiest things to do in life. That's what you would think. But in true reality, talking to women is probably the toughest act for most men to accomplish. Sad? Yes. Shameful? You bet.

Let's go ahead and name it on shyness because I do not know why (some) guys find it tough to not just approach a pretty woman at a party or in the supermarket to just say hi and make an attempt to meet and get to know her. It is as tough than having to face members of SEAL Team 6 in a dark alley immediately after you have insulted their patriotism. That tough.

 Communication lead to this
Communication lead to this
Notice how this guy makes it a point to be a good listener
Notice how this guy makes it a point to be a good listener

Things have changed

Talking to women in 2015 has slightly-changed from the simple mindset of a guy just throwing a plastic smile in the direction of an attractive woman and saying some overused line as: "Hey, sweet babe. Time for your life to change and by just talking to me."

Put yourself in the woman's place, you eager guys. She doesn't know how to react to you in an inoffensive way, so you have, not meaning to, put her in a corner and she feels uncomfortable. To be blunt, that is simply because you do not know the "real" ways to talk to a woman. You have not been given the expert ways in which to approach and talk with a pretty woman.

Men, time to do some learning

It is a process. Part of that mysterious, sometimes unstable journey in gaining the trust of the lady before you start an intelligent conversation with her. Notice I said "intelligent?" Not some jibberish, encrypted jargon spoken by a skateboarding "mall rat" of 2015 or some wasted frat brother who only cares for himself when it comes to associating with women.

Thank you, folk-legend, Bob Dylan, for that iconic song, "The Times They Are a Changin'" And to coincide with that song and its message, I proudly give you, the reinvented guys from the 1970s through the 1990s, . . .

Expert, Working Ways for You to Talk Correctly to Women

Good coffee, good vibes and great talk
Good coffee, good vibes and great talk
She is looking at him for he has just remembered what she said ten minutes ago
She is looking at him for he has just remembered what she said ten minutes ago
Wow! Two gorgeous ladies to share ideas with
Wow! Two gorgeous ladies to share ideas with
He has three lovelies to chat with
He has three lovelies to chat with
Yeah, man. What a great day
Yeah, man. What a great day
This is a very intimate moment being shared by a girl and a guy who love to talk to each other
This is a very intimate moment being shared by a girl and a guy who love to talk to each other
He responds with sincere laughter at her funny joke about her boss
He responds with sincere laughter at her funny joke about her boss
Older men can use the tips in this hub to chat with their favorite lady
Older men can use the tips in this hub to chat with their favorite lady

(although this piece is aimed at guys such as myself, there is absolutely NO harm, confusion, or mean-spirited meanings intended. Thanks, Kenneth)

Things That You Do NOT Need to Do in Talking to a Woman:

  • Overly-exaggerate yourself in any way. Women are endowed with this special sense where they can see through a con job as easilly as reading a cheap newspaper.
  • Lie about anything--job duties, salary per year, famous people you are "related" to.
  • Offend her with your wide-eyes scanning her up and down as if she were a piece of meat for sale in the butcher's window.
  • Pretending to be listening to her and what she says, but you only hear three out of ten words.
  • Letting your hands touch her in a disrespectful way and then acting like you didn't mean it.
  • Thinking that your lack of confidence is a turn-on for meeting this woman. It is not. Just be as confident as you can.
  • She knows that you are not perfect and neither is she. Have fun when you talk to her and when it is time to be serious, be serious.

Things You DO Need to Do in Talking to a Woman:

  • Be you. No matter if you are a pauper. Be you. This is so important to women.
  • Tell the truth from the beginning. Yes, if you are divorced or just coming from a bad relationship. Be honest without being rude as to talk harshly about your "ex" wife or girlfriend.
  • Use your eyes to say to her, "I am listening. I am what I am."
  • Be sincere when you talk or ask her something. Do NOT be sarcastic even in fun. Remember, you are in the "First Impressions are Lasting Impressions" stage of your friendship with this lady.
  • Be moderate. This is a master key. Moderate means NOT overdoing your talking to her, telling her stale jokes and nudging her in the ribs as if she is a bar buddy, and asking questions about her. Sensibility goes a long way when talking to a woman.
  • Be honest. This is similar to my tip of telling the truth from the beginning. If perhaps, while you are talking to this pretty woman, another attractive lady walks by and you glance at her. If the woman you are talking to "ribs" you in fun by asking, "was she pretty?" Please do not lie and tell the first woman you didn't notice. Just say yes or no and continue to conversation.

ADVICE: do not try to master all of these expert tips on talking to women. Just master a few. Then if needed, master the rest of them.

Comments

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    • kenneth avery profile imageAUTHOR

      Kenneth Avery 

      3 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama

      ZRMoore,

      Amen! You certainly offer a lot of wise advice to those guys who will listen. Thanks for sharing and thanks for your comment.

      Visit with me anytime.

    • kenneth avery profile imageAUTHOR

      Kenneth Avery 

      3 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama

      Kylyssa,

      I like your idea. It would be a lot easier for men to meet women in this fashion, but in my case, I was too carried away with how pretty they were and how they dressed . . .females have to be one of the Most Important Creations God ever made.

    • kenneth avery profile imageAUTHOR

      Kenneth Avery 

      3 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama

      The0NatureBoy,

      Thanks, my friend, for the compliments and for leaving the comment. I do my best to help girls and guys with sound advice. Sowing seeds of hope, love and peace beats arguing, causing strife and negative vibes anyday.

      Take care and have a great night.

    • kenneth avery profile imageAUTHOR

      Kenneth Avery 

      3 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama

      Hi, Dana,

      Thank you for the compliment.

      I appreciate YOU so much. I wasted an entire evening on a date with a girl years ago and all she talked about was her "ex." I tried every compliment on her I could, but after the "thanks," it was back to the "ex" and finally the end of the night came . . .what a happy camper I was.

      I thank you, Dana, for your friendship and following.

    • kenneth avery profile imageAUTHOR

      Kenneth Avery 

      3 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama

      Hello, vkwok,

      Thank you, dear friend, for the support.

      Maybe besides writing for HP, I need to open a dating service like EHarmony. Now that is a dangerous job.

    • vkwok profile image

      Victor W. Kwok 

      3 years ago from Hawaii

      Thanks for the great tips!

    • The0NatureBoy profile image

      Elijah A Alexander Jr 

      3 years ago from Washington DC

      That's the whole idea, Kylyssa, and what I recommend as well as do.

    • Kylyssa profile image

      Kylyssa Shay 

      3 years ago from Overlooking a meadow near Grand Rapids, Michigan, USA

      I'd suggest acting exactly as if the woman is a man you'd like to become friends with when you first meet her.

    • The0NatureBoy profile image

      Elijah A Alexander Jr 

      3 years ago from Washington DC

      Kenneth,

      Very, VERY sound dos and don't when meeting girls. I find it difficult to lie to girl because I treasure my being a boy of truth under all circumstances. I agree with both, D R Moore and Dana Tate, as well as you. This is more in line with things I enjoy talking about, my friend.

      Joy to you!

    • Dana Tate profile image

      Dana Tate 

      3 years ago from LOS ANGELES

      Good tips here. Especially about being honest about past relationships and not bad-mouthing the ex. When someone I meet starts bad mouthing or talking too much about their ex, I know they're unresolved issues and to me that's a red flag.

    • ZRMoore profile image

      ZRMoore 

      3 years ago

      Great article! Hit everything on point. A lot of men need to read this because it's all true. I especially hate when a man approaches you like he's the answer to all your problems. A lot of guys do that. I also hate when they act like you should automatically be honored that he chose to speak to you.

      Men can be so much more effective with their attempts to meet women if they will just be themselves. Most women can spot a fake from the moon. So stop doing that. Stop treating women like there is a generic standard that all women will respond to. Each woman is different.

      It will be easier to get her interested in you if you treat her like a human being from the very beginning.

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