Faces of Domestic Violence – “Precious” the Movie

“Precious” the movie is part 3 of a series that is dedicated to the Faces of Domestic Violence. In part 1 of this series I began telling my friend Sara’s story that involved emotional and verbal abuse that began with Eli’s mother who yelled and screamed at Eli and his Dad. Eventually this domestic abuse began its vicious cycle and transitioned from Eli be abused by his Mom to Eli abusing Sara, his wife. Part 2 presented celebrity faces that everyone recognizes that have survived domestic violence and have moved forward to lead productive lives away from their abusers.

Now part 3 is being written as a cry and plea for everyone not to forget about Domestic Violence and it “real life” victims. “Precious” the movie, is a film about domestic violence that is based on the novel called “Push” which was published in 1996 and written by an author named Sapphire. Perhaps you have not heard about this movie or the book therefore, I am providing you will a clip of the movie below.

Many movie critics are predicting that both the comedian Mo’Nique,who plays Precious’s mother (pictured above) and the lead actress Gabourey Sidibe, who plays Precious, and Paula Patton, the teacher should be nominated for Oscars for their performances.

Gabourey Sidibe a newcomer, along with many of the other stars has been interviewed by ABC, NBC, and numerous other networks and media; which is simply fantastic. However, I have been disappointed that these interviews have not taken an extra minute to refocus everyone on what this movie represents – the problems of domestic violence. Domestic Violence is a beast that must be brought out in the open and demolished.

While watching this movie you realize that the 16 year old character named Claireece “Precious” Jones is probably in the worst fate possible within a family of domestic violence. She was impregnated twice by her father; her mother physically abuses her and calls her illiterate; while others laugh and tease her about being overweight. Precious like many others that have been abused goes through the phases of attempting to adjust and deal with her present situation.

When being abused by her father she dreams and envisions that she is being loved by her fantasized “light-skinned” boyfriend that loves her dearly. When being abused by her mother, Precious day-dreams of being a famous movie star and sometimes imagines herself as a white girl that is giddy, happy, and without a care in the world. Sadly, for real life victims I would imagine that dreaming of a better life is utilized as a means of coping with the ugly environment that is surrounding them.

It has been written that some critics within the black community are offended because they believe this movie is exploitative, or suggests that all black women are like Precious and or her Mom. Personally, I challenge everyone not to get in the hype of what Precious is or is not representing of the black community. I’ve seen articles that have chosen to debate culture, environment, and stigmatism instead of the real issue of Domestic Abuse. Numerous friends saw the movie and the only comment was that they didn’t feel it was a movie for teenagers. Of which, I beg to differ. Statistics show that 1 out of 3 teenagers have experienced domestic violence or know someone who is experiencing it.

So the purpose of this hub is to take the light off the Stars in the movie and place the spot light back on the true problem - Domestic Violence. The mostly star casted movie will get plenty of reviews and time in the spot lights. The debates of whether or not it portrays a positive image of the black community will receive its lime-light, as well. But, what about more media coverage and taking a stance on the problem that no one really wants to discuss and that is the Domestic Violence. “When are we as the human race going to stand up and place a spot light into the eyes of this deep dark demon of a monster that no one wants to face and no one has so far addressed with sound solutions?,” asks the cry and plea of this hub.

Domestic Violence and Domestic Abuse transcends ethnicity it does not exist because of the color of someone’s skin; moreover, it exists within all countries and all social levels of wealth. In Precious’ situation she was being abused by everyone that was supposed to love, nurture, and take care of her. While many teenagers suffer abuse via boyfriend or girlfriend relationships, many children are physically, emotionally, and sexually abused by a parent, guardian, and or other relatives. Here are some astounding statistics on domestic abuse involving young women that are 14 to 24 years of age:

• Women ages 16 to 24 experience the highest rates of intimate violence – nearly 20 percent of every 1000 women within this age group.
• Approximately, 1 out of every 3 high school students and 1 in 5 college females has been or will be involved in an abusive relationship.
• Every 40 out of 100 teenage girls between the ages of 14 to 17 know someone who has been hit or beaten by their boyfriend.
• 60 percent out of a survey of 500 young women were involved in an ongoing abusive relationship.
• 68 percent of raped young women know their attacker either as a boyfriend, friend, or casual acquaintance.

Common clues that indicate a teenager may be experiencing domestic violence:

• Physical signs of injury
• Truancy, dropping out of school
• Failing grades
• Indecision
• Changes in mood or personality

• Use of drugs/alcohol
• Pregnancy
• Emotional outburst
• Isolation

If you have no knowledge of domestic violence, the movie Precious will make you think, cry, soul search, and or literally leave you speechless.  My advice is to see it on a day that you can do something positive after the movie in order to stay grounded and remain in a positive state of mind.  The actors are so good that you could easily slip into a mood of being depressed for Precious as well as yourself if one is not careful. My family and I went home, cooked a meal together, shared our thoughts about the movie, and any “real life” situations that were bothering us as a means of “debriefing” ourselves.

If you or someone you love is being abused; I challenge you to find the courage to stop the abuse cycle.  Find the courage to stop the violence if not for you; then do it for the sake of other loved ones that maybe involved in the volatile environment.  The only way to break the domestic abuse cycle is to remove you and your loved ones from the abuser’s attack. It is never advisable to physically fight the abuser who is most likely stronger than what you are; however, you can begin to mentally fight to leave and separate yourself from the abuser.  Set a goal and develop a plan of action towards improving your situation.  You do not have to do this alone; seek help from family, friends, and the hotlines provided here and on the other hubs listed.  Change and fear of the unknown are powerful deterrents, so it is important to stay focused on the fact that you are an individual that deserves so much more out of life.  

As the curtain closes on Precious the movie, remember that domestic violence is real. It is a beast that knows no one color or gender. If you are being abused seek help just as Precious did. The world is your oyster if you can move pass the abuse...