- Gender and Relationships
Finding "The One" By Finding Yourself First
It's often said that nobody ever finds their soulmate by looking for him; he appears out of the blue when you're least expecting it. This may be true, but a simple lack of effort in the search for love is not what allures men to drop to a knee and pop the question. No, there's something much bigger - it's the something we ARE doing while we're busy NOT looking for love. Finding ourselves.
How could you possibly expect someone to love you, if you don't love yourself? Or for them to understand all of your ways and except all of your flaws when you don't? That's unreasonable and the root of so many problems in relationships today. If you hate your love-handles, or your muffin top, why should your significant other love them? If you're frustrated by your lack of motivation and drive, why should you significant other not be?
By directing your focus on self-love and not looking-for-love, you'll begin to see yourself in a completely new way - and then your prospective partners will be able to as well. Confidence is not only extremely recognizable, it's sexy. A confident plain-jane can walk into a bar and instantly be offered drinks upon drinks, while the insecure 10 sits in a booth were her arms crossed. There's such an attraction to women who know their value, and their worth. When a man is assured that you're comfortable with you, he feels that he can be too.
So it's time to stop looking for a boyfriend and start looking in the mirror. Discover new things about yourself, start a new hobby or read a new book. Self-Introspection can go a long way. And I promise, once you love yourself, love will find its way to you. xoxo, C.