- Gender and Relationships
From a Woman to a Woman
In a world run by men, I often sit back and wonder why women constantly bash each other. The way she looks, acts, her hobbies, her sex life, the way she feeds her baby; there is always something to be judged. After fighting tirelessly, women are still belittled not only by men, but sadly, by each other.
This is for the prepubescent girl struggling with poor body image. This is for the recent divorcee who feels she was simply not enough for her spouse. This is for the single mother who was bashed for publicly breastfeeding. This is for you.
I'll tell you the truth, I was a miserable little girl. I was constantly made fun of at school, constantly bullied at home, and constantly at war with myself. My father was scum. My long distance boyfriend was always cheating on me, and even my best friends made me feel like an outcast.
I felt like I had nothing and no one. I self harmed. I had anxiety. I was depressed. I was suicidal.
But something in me told me not to give up. And I'm glad I didn't. Last night, I watched my husband play peek-a-boo with our one year old daughter, and for the first time, she covered her eyes with her hands and did it back. He sat across from me at dinner, and told me it was delicious, repeating "mmm!" We watched wrestling on TV while munching down an entire bag of Sweet and Spicy Chili Doritos and KitKats, and laughing at the really bad joke Randy Orton made.
Point is...it gets better. Days are hard, weeks, months...years even! If love keeps escaping you, then it isn't the real love you need. Hold out hope. I absolutely live for the little moments I mentioned above. All of the baby's milestones, all of my husband's bad jokes...those random moments at night when he wakes up, grabs my face, kisses me hard, then goes back to sleep. These are all wonderful things that I would have missed out on had I given up.
If you're struggling with self harm or poor body image, know this...you're beautiful. No matter what anyone tells you. If that boy you have a crush on doesn't like you back, he's not the one whose name you should be scribbling on your notebook. I know... I had a crush on one boy for many years. One day he stood in front of our whole class called me a "thing" and said I was fat and gross. Today, he's a drug addict who can't keep a job. I'm still fat but I'm a medical assistant who is married to the most wonderful man.
If you're contemplating suicide...stop it. Things seem dark. Things seem bleak. But things aren't always as they seem. Three times I've started taking handfuls of prescription medication trying to end my life. I lived for a reason. You're here for a reason. You may not discover said reason for many years...but when you do, you'll realize what you have had all along. Be strong...win this fight! Someone somewhere needs you.
If you feel your man/girl is your only source of happiness, or if you're stuck in an abusive relationship... Eve was made for Adam. Adam was not made for Eve. Have courage. Be the backbone. Women are the givers of life. Our bodies are temples. We're strong sturdy beings. He needs you more than you need him. It's great to have love, I adore my husband, but truth be told, I can't see the future. Everyday I think about what I would do if he left. I would be crushed...I love this man. But, I will not wilt. I'm a beautiful flower with or without him. You're a flower too, darling. You need warmth to grow.
My beautiful ladies... be brave. There is so much to life. The little moments are the best moments, and you're here for a reason. You're to be feared. Women over the years have fought hard for us women today. Don't give up in the darkest hour. It's always dark before dawn. You've got this! Be brave, ladies.