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Getting a Second Date: How to get a Second Date with an awesome woman

Updated on June 30, 2014

How to get that second date

1 Be creative

2 Check up on your date

3 Play it cool

4 Ask questions

5 Chivalry still counts

6 Find a common interest and passion

7 Be a good listener

8 Show her you are interested

Love and dating

Love and dating
Love and dating | Source


Dating is an important social interaction between man and woman that reveals the level of comparability, similarity and potential. Apart from the beauty of romance there should be some levels of attraction, cohesion and common goals like having a family, financial security and a desire to achieve.

Dates are meant to impresses and learn about the other person through intuition should have some form of attraction and a true desire to know the other person. Men have a harder time because getting a second date with a love interest depends on the outcome of the first date.

Other things to consider before going on that date is to take proper care of your appearance, physical presence and behavior. Getting a second date depends on the first impression you make during the odd one hour date.

There is a stress factor to going on a first date because you are going to meet a stranger who might become a life partner or love interest. Managing the stress, anxiety and knowing what works can weight between getting a chance at love or dismal failure.

After a pleasant date courtesy dictates that you call back thanking your date for a pleasant evening even if you have no plans for a second date. But if you want a second date calling provides a good opportunity to ask for another.

Dating image

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Dating imageA couple having funLove and romance a couple holding hands
Dating image
Dating image | Source
A couple having fun
A couple having fun | Source
Love and romance a couple holding hands
Love and romance a couple holding hands | Source

Look up your date

There is nothing wrong in checking  up your date
There is nothing wrong in checking up your date | Source

Check up on the person

Listed bellow is 10 important rules that might just guarantee a second date.

The internet has made our private lives a bit more public by putting to much information online making it readily available to anyone that is interested. Checking up on your date might seem sneaky but I can assure you she’s already checked you out, so if you have skeletons in your closet you are busted.

If you have a criminal record and a lowly job it’s only right to come clean if the question arises, lies is not a good way of starting a relationship. Having an ego, being loud and boastful are things you shouldn’t do on a date.

Play it cool

On your date play it cool and don’t be overeager, lack of maturity and flattery would get you nowhere, decorum should be your watchword. Complementing her on her beauty, cloths and carriage only groups you with several thousand admires who use the same cheesy lines.

Standing out from the crowd by being yourself and unique would have a greater impression on your date than trying to score unnecessary points. No woman likes a man without self confidence, good posture and carriage. Good manners and a gentleman’s forbearance would show more maturity and someone putting an effort to impress in the right way.

Dating and communication

Talk to your date. Image of a woman and man talking
Talk to your date. Image of a woman and man talking | Source

Ask questions

Good conversation is key to a successful date remember some awful dates where there is nothing in common to talk about or that terrible silence. Conversations could be along the line of jobs, family and mutual friends if any and hobbies.

Talk about you when asked, ask about her favorite things, likes and dislikes and be relaxed and cool after all this is mere socializing and not an inquiry or investigation. Be prepared because she would ask you a ton of question because she has to make a quick determination if there is any prospect in a second date.

Always be yourself truthful and an open book while keeping a little mystery to keep her interesting and guessing playing all your cards early might bore her.

Chivalry still counts

Chivalry still goes a long way in today’s world and shows you are putting in the effort to impress, doing things like opening the door of the car, pulling out seat is a nice gesture. Offer to pay the tab by showing intent like reaching out to pick the tab and allowing her make an order first.

If she insists that you share the tab be magnanimous and she the tab because if she’s a feminist insisting would defiantly spoil your chances of a second date. Be courteous not only to your guest but to people you deal with while on the date like the waiter, elevator attendant, steward or even chef.

Show you are having a nice time she’s not a mind reader so encouraging smiles, spontaneous laughter and real enthusiasm are clear signals that you’re having a nice time.

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Find a common passion

Having something in common is important in a relationship finding common interests shows having similar tastes in certain things. The common interests could be about politics, entertainment, a particular sporting activity, same social circle, Alma mater, or area, interests are as varied and numerous finding they would make good conversation.

Be a good listener

You should be a good listener because there is nothing rudder than the lady trying to have a conversation and any of the two parties is distracted and not listening. When talking make eye contact, listen attentively and interrupt only after she’s finished speaking.

General issues are fine but that is not the reason you are dating she needs to know as much information as possible to make a determination. Answer her quarries honestly but if there are areas you fill uncomfortable talking about let her know a reasonable lady would honor your wishes.


Kissing is important in relationships
Kissing is important in relationships | Source

Good and bad date ethics

date ethics
bad practices
ask questions
chivalry matters
play it cool
common interests
criticize her

Kissing on the first date

Some experts say it’s okay to kiss on the first day but I say that could be a tactical error moving in for the kiss, let her make the first subtle move before you plunge in. A simple act like holding hands can be more effective and powerful that a kiss, if she has strong religious roots then kissing would be inappropriate.

That is why getting to know the important detail about your dinner date is necessary if you are interested in a second date with the woman.

Be creative

Going to standard places like the cinema or a bar can be boring, choose a unique venue or lovely restaurant but should be a public place. The Location that you choose should play moderate music so you can have a good conversation and get to know each other.

Try to seat beside your date rather than seat opposite her giving you closer proximity which makes it easier during conversation. Remember eye contact is important and listen to what she says without interruptions avoid distractions.

How not to get a second date

1 Be obnoxious

2 Talk endlessly

3 Show pride

4 Allow her pay for the meal

5 Talk endlessly on your phone

6 Be rude and dress shabbily

Be of best behavior

Be on your best behavior arguing with your date or barman is a real mood killer, complaining is even worse, avoid issue concerning ex lovers. Drink moderately or avoid alcohol or take only enough to losing you up, excessive drinking is bad during a date.

How to Get a Second Date


A proud person
A proud person | Source

Bad Date

Reasons why she might not be interested in a second date include

Lack of adequate planning. You should always plan a date and don’t leave anything to chance, you can plan but leave room for flexibility, planning a date reveals the character of the man and his tastes and being punctual also counts.

Talk about yourselves. Talking about yourselves is important on a first date this gives an insight to the character, academic qualification likes and dislikes including family background. Let her talk about herself and answer all her questions truthfully. Telling lies and trying to be someone your not would eventual have negative implications.

Avoid boasting. Being boastful about your accomplishment is a real mood killer and shows arrogance and ego which is bad for the date. No matter your accomplishment someone has better qualifications than yours so keep the ego in check.

Don’t talk about your ex. You ex. should never come up in any discussion leave your past in the past if you are ready to move on with a new woman. Talking about an ex. might indicate your unwillingness to start a new chapter in your life.

Follow the second day rule. After a successful date if you are disposed on having a second date then calling her the next date shows to much eagerness but calling two days after has given her time to decide if she’s interested in a second date.


Be yourself when going out on a date, prepare adequately and be courteous even when the date seems to lead no where. Remember that even though you might be interested in a second date or a future union the prerogative always lies with the ladies decision so respect it.


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    • word55 profile image

      Word 3 years ago from Chicago

      Hi Tony55, my co-55 partner, I can appreciate all you've said here. Keep up the good work and voted way up!