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How To Approach a Girl And Create Attraction

Updated on June 22, 2015
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I'm a full-time blogger and ghostwriter. I enjoy writing about how to be happier in life and in love.

If you see a girl you like, then it is important that you approach her. You may not get another opportunity to do so if you let the moment pass you by.

However, it is more important that you create a sense of attraction towards you when you approach her.

Attraction is what separates the guy she wants to be friends with from the guy she wants to date.

Focus on Your Body Language

Even if a guy says all the wrong things, a girl may still not be able to resist a guy with the right type of body language. You have probably heard the expression 'actions are louder than words,' right? Well, the truth is that actions make up 80 percent of what we are saying, so - yes, they are louder than words!

First, you need to give off a sense of confidence. A man who is confident in himself is extremely attractive to a woman. In fact, low self-confidence is often why guys land in the friend zone in the first place; they display an attitude that needs reassurance and approval, and women don't respond to them the same way as a man who understands women, knows what he wants, and knows what he is doing around (and with) women.

This means you need to keep your head up, shoulders back, and your eyes forward. If you are slouching or look down while you approach her and talk to her, then she is going to see that you are nervous and lack confidence, and you may blow the attraction part.

Second, you should keep your gestures to a minimum. If you wave your hands all over the place, shift from foot to foot, or constantly play with your hair, then you will send a message of low self-confidence. That, or extreme anxiety. And neither is going to create attraction in a girl.

Third, you should try to touch her at some point to create that excitement that goes along with it. A light touch can send shivers down her spine and put butterflies in her stomach, and attraction will be a signed and sealed deal at that point.

Do not touch her inappropriately though, because that will get you rejected quickly. Instead, accidentally touch her hand or lightly touch her arm to guide her as she walks or stands up.

Lastly, and most importantly, you have to maintain eye contact. Eye contact will tell a woman all she needs to know about you. If you are looking around at other people, or just objects like the door or table, she will start to wonder how interested you really are in her.

Alternatively, if you give her eye contact at least 80 percent of the conversation, then she will feel connected to you because she will feel as though you are really interested, listening, and engaged with her. A huge part of attraction for women is emotional. If she feels connected to you, then you will create attraction (as long as you are confident as well.)

Pay Attention To What You Say

While body language is the most important part of how to approach a girl and create attraction, you also need to say the right things so that she doesn't receive mixed signals from your body language and your words. Mixed signals will cause her to distrust you slightly, and that distrust will not help you win her over.

First, don't use cheesy pick up lines. Girls have heard them all before, and they seem like a desperate attempt to say something because you have nothing intelligent to say on your own.

Second, don't say something about her looks. She already knows you find her attractive, or you wouldn't have approached her. As I said before, women feel connected emotionally, and if you show her that you are interested in more than just her looks, you will be separating yourself from most of the guys that approach her.

Show interest in her by talking about something that is obvious about her. For instance, if you are at a coffee shop, then you may want to ask her what kind of coffee she is drinking or why she enjoys the place or what book she is reading. If you talk about your surroundings, and ask her questions about them, then she will feel as though you actually want to get to know her (and not just get in her pants.)

Third, show her interest in getting to know her better by asking her for her number. The best way to do this is to pay attention to what she is talking about a pick something out of the conversation to create an excuse to see her again.

For instance, if she mentions that she enjoys being out in nature, then you can ask her if she would like to go for a picnic sometime. (I know that is kind of a lame example, but you get the picture right? Use her interests to make her interested in you.)

Lastly, leave her wanting more. This means quit while you are ahead! If you make the moment go on for too long, then you can do or say something that ruins her attraction towards to you.

Therefore, when you notice that she is enjoying herself, and you feel like you have a good conversation, tell her that you have to go but you are looking forward to getting together with her in the future. This will leave your interaction on a really high note, and she will be excited about seeing you again because you made her feel so good during this interaction.

In the end, you need to create attraction with any girl you approach if you want to leave her thinking about you in a good way. Otherwise, you may be put in the 'he's okay, but he's more friend material than anything.' Create attraction by using your body language properly and talking about the right things.


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