- Gender and Relationships
The Secrets to Building a Lasting Relationship
The art of attracting women.
Have you ever had a crush on the lady who shows no interests beyond casual friendship? Do you always find yourself struggling to
keep the conversation going soon after you have exchanged pleasantries with her? I'll safely bet you spend hours grooming yourself to look nice for your women. Many men do. However, if you take it upon your looks, status or financial resources at your disposal to win over women, you're in for a rude shock.
Misconceptions about women attraction.
As is often the case, many men tend to think that women are attracted to what they see or hear. Well, the truth is tad shocking. While men are easily fascinated with appearance and nice personality, attraction in women is based on personality traits. "But I have a pleasant character. I am very accommodative, even compromising at times", you may say. Many men are at pains to understand what attracts women.
Ironically, it's a concept that's rather easy to understand, but because it's so illogical and counter intuitive, it's easy to miss it entirely.
Many men go at great length to figure out what attracts women. What wins them over? Personally, the concept of women and dating hasn't always been a walk in the park. When the grooming, nice, pretentious character proved to be a non winner, I did what most other guys do. I thought a lot about the concept. I read extensively on women and dating. I even asked lots of questions to friends on what attracts women.
How do I win her over?
How do you win over your lady's attention?
As a matter of fact, I thought that since I read a lot on psychology and human behavior, which fascinates me, I would have an upper hand when it came to winning women. Well, what a humbling experience I was in for.
May times over, I made the same mistake; assuming that attraction works the same way in women it does in men. As a result, I had many off target hits with women. You can bet it all ended in dull moments. Until I figured out that something else might work, the hard way though.
These are some useful things I found out:
1. Women are attracted to certain personality traits.
Women are attracted to certain specific innate qualities and personality traits. It's much more likely for a young, beautiful lady to have a flirt with a guy who has no clue about fashion. It's based on how the ladies feel around such guys. And it’s all based on knowing how to communicate your intentions and feelings. While it doesn't mean that women aren't attracted to grooming and fashion conscious men, physical looks only plays a second fiddle to inborn personality trait.
2. Do physical looks and status play in all this?
Of course they do. But they're not nearly as important as most men think they are. Well, it's a misconception men make as they start dating. While the importance of great looks, prime age and lots of money cannot be overlooked when it comes to hooking up women, they can't sustain it in absence of attractive personal traits. In contrast to what to men are dawn to, women are attracted by what can't be seen.
There are a dozen factors in play when it comes to attracting women. Understanding such factors is utmost vital:
i) That there is variation on how attraction occurs in men and women.
ii) While men attraction is mostly based on physical traits and intuitive instincts, women are sensitive when it comes to personality traits.
Women don't decide who to feel attracted to with their logical minds. They decide with their emotions and then make up reasons and rationalize it.
Attraction isn't a Choice!
It all depends on innate personality traits and especially more on your communication skills. This is why some men attract women so well, while others struggle. Yet any man can improve his success with women dramatically, no matter what his looks, age, or income.