- Gender and Relationships
How To Enjoy Single Life
As I woke up this morning I was full of such overwhelming joy. My reason simply was because I was alive. Only a week ago a friend had died under tragic circumstances. When people close to you die you begin to value life more. You also begin to review and reflect upon your own life, asking yourself questions like ‘if I should die today what would people be saying about me?’
Too often we are focused on what we have not got what we want now or what we are yet to receive. So much so we fail to take stock of all we currently have in our lives. If we could just do this and have a heart full of gratitude for all the things God has done in our lives, any sadness we may feel can only turn into joy. After all our lives are in God’s hands and as our heavenly father he only wants the best for us.
My friend who died lived life to the full despite having to go through a serious illness and other challenges. She never complained. She never allowed it to stop her from making the most out of life or being a blessing. She made every minute of her life count. She is now gone but has left a tangible mark on this earth. She set up a foundation before she died and her place of work has dedicated a suite after her. What an amazing life she lived.
I tell you this story just to make you stop for a moment to value the life you have. Irrespective of what your outward condition may be because of Christ that dwells within you, you can overcome. You do not need to allow that circumstance to control you. The word of God tells us we have dominion (Genesis 1:26).
If we therefore apply this to Singleness, it follows dominion can be achieved in this area. There is a song that says count your blessings name them one by one. Count your blessings see what God has done Count your blessing name them one by one and it will surprise you what the Lord has done. Why do you not take time now and do a little exercise of recounting every blessing you have. You will be amazed about how blessed you really. And secondly how we take so many things for granted e.g. in my case, my health!
I hope I have given you food for thought. I would like you to take this a step further and to think about all the opportunities you have as a single. Opportunities that some married people are envious of!
1. Personal freedom – the ability to “come” and “go” freely without having to account to another person.
The freedom to do what you want, when you want! This is one of the most important gifts a single person has at their disposal; yet it is so often abused. You tend to realise the value of the freedom you have only when it is taken away from you or when you relinquish it. Marriage does not mean you lack freedom. It just means you are accountable to your spouse. Therefore, it is a valuable commodity for a single person. There is power and potential because you do not have to account to anyone unless you choose to.
2. Time and space to establish who they are, discovering their “raison de vivre” i.e. what drives their life.
Positive and healthy relationships are based on two people coming together who are complete in themselves. Therefore, in order to have a fulfilling relationship you would need to know your reason and purpose for living. There is power in such knowledge as it helps you to keep focus and not get discouraged from the inevitable trials of life.
3. The potential for spiritual growth, learning, training and development
Singles have all the time to discover their identity, values, beliefs and philosophy to life. They are also able to study the word and single-mindedly pursue goals for themselves.
4. It is the season in which to establish their life map. Where they want to go and what they want to be
As individuals, we must find the right direction and means in achieving goals. It is important that as a single person, you have a vision and seek fulfilling means in reaching your goals.
5. The opportunity to maximize one’s self worth
Singles most often have the ability to give their all to their chosen aspirations and in so doing live to their full potential in life.
6. Freedom to travel, discover cultures and ways of doing things
Singles are free to pursue interests such as culture, which widens global awareness and improves outlook on world issues.
7. The unrestricted ability to be a blessing to others
As a single person, you can maximise your capability of reaching out to people and not take into account certain commitments and responsibilities which married people do.
8. The great opportunity to network and develop business and social relationships
Single people have the opportunity and freedom to form a wide range of relationships as a result of connecting and meeting like-minded people.
9. The capability of living a focused life – the power to focus on their vision, career, business and dreams
When there are no distractions, you can single-mindedly focus on your career, vision and dreams. You have nobody you need to convince except yourself when you embark upon this.
10. Flexibility in terms of career movement – a single person can put their career development into overdrive
Singles have the flexibility to explore opportunities of travelling in order to attain career goals, where necessary. Also to be single-minded in the pursuit of their career is an added bonus. The sky is the limit because there are fewer commitments.
The list is by no means exhaustive as there are other countless ways a single person can enjoy the power and potential of their single status. However, what this does is to give a snapshot of ways in which a single person can enjoy their singleness by acknowledging the advantageous position they are in because they are not married. The sky is the limit for every single person who understands that with God in their lives, they can do all things and in their single status, they have the freedom of choice to aim for the best.
There is no need for a single person to enter the Valley of Regret, visit Discouragement, maintain or sit under the “Poor Me” tree. But rather to acknowledge who they are, face the facts, challenge them and change them in order to be who God ordained them to be: triumphant in every sphere of their life.