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How To Get The "Sexy" Back Into Your Life

Updated on September 8, 2017

Let’s face it, we are all sexual beings. Ask any doctor. It’s a plain and simple fact. Since there is no denying it, we may as well give our sensuality its fair due. If you find you’ve been wearing the practical flat shoes and the bulky gray sweater way too often, that means it is time to make some changes. Your comfy shoes and no-make-up days have their place, but so do your high heels and long dark lashes. So....you'd best think twice about why you've subconsciously given your high heels the boot, so to speak.

Right now is the time to achieve some balance in your life---and that means letting your sensuality have some say.....I can hear it screaming to you now, “Let me out, woman!" "I want to be heard and I'm not taking 'No' for an answer!” Well, alright then. Guess that means it is time to get ready to push your personal boundaries a bit. A few subtle changes here and there will make all the difference. So let's get ready---you are about to feel like a desirable woman once again!

Big Beautiful model, Crystal Renn. As you can see, she knows how to use her Rubenesque figure for all its worth!
Big Beautiful model, Crystal Renn. As you can see, she knows how to use her Rubenesque figure for all its worth!

No More Excuses, Ladies!

For you ladies who say you will think about getting your "sexy" back once you lose 20 lbs, or once you save up for the Botox, or once you sign up for the gym membership, or once you clean out your attic, or once you get the car fixed, or once you do this and after you do that----Uh, No! Forget All Of That!

Dove Research: The Real Truth About Beauty: Revisited

• Only 4% of women around the world consider themselves beautiful (up from 2% in 2004)
• Only 11% of girls globally are comfortable using the word beautiful to describe themselves
• 72% of girls feel tremendous pressure to be beautiful
• 80% of women agree that every woman has something about her that is beautiful but do not see their own beauty
• More than half (54%) of women globally agree that when it comes to how they look, they are their own worst beauty critic

Life will always give you something for you to do, besides getting your sexy back.. You are making excuses and procrastinating even though, deep down, you're feeling "blah" and basically as far from sexy as any woman can be.

That sensual "spark" you once had just isn't there anymore. Somewhere along the line, it simply vanished. You chalk it up to having too much on your plate. Yet the truth is that you are just being lazy about taking care of yourself---under the guise of altruism. I'm not buying into that and either should you. Your life and your sensuality matter just as much as anyone or anything else on this planet---so stop your whining and start doing what you have to do to get your sensual sparkle back. The time is now! No more excuses!

Okay then, without further ado, let’s jump right in to activity number one.

Get the Sway Back in Your Hips.

Imagine the leaves of a palm tree swaying gently in the breeze. That's the "sway" you're aiming for when you begin working those pretty hips of yours. So how to begin? First you've got to dig your old heels out of the back of the closet. Okay, now put them on. In the privacy of your home, start practicing "the sway." I don't care if it's early Saturday morning and you've still got your pajamas on. Right now, it's the heels that matter. So go get your coffee brewing, and then start walking. You will soon realize that it is practically impossible not to move those amazingt hips of yours when you are walking in a pair of heels. Now remember, you don't have to over-do it. You want to aim for the "gentle breeze" effect.

Top Five Sexiest Countries According To Men

1. Brazil

2. Russia

3. Colombia

4. Great Britain

5. Philippines

Hmmm. Apparently, the United States is nowhere to be seen. Guess we have our work cut out for us. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/travel

Truly, there isn't quite anything like working your hips in that soft and sensual way to make you feel sexy and alive! Shakira knew what she was talking about when she sang, "The Hips Don't Lie."

Just to clarify, I'm not suggesting you do the belly dancer "Shakira" thing as you practice swiveling your hips in those pretty heels of yours---well, unless the spirit moves you! Actually, the Shakira video below is meant for inspiration and fun! A way to get your creative juices flowing. In real life, you're a palm tree swaying gently in the breeze. Now get to it!

When asked, a very honest guy had this to say about high heels:

"Men like feminine women and high heels are distinctively feminine. Furthermore, they are somewhat restrictive and require an effort to wear, so by wearing them you are making the statement that you are serious about being feminine and perhaps also that you want the man to be masculine.....Finally, they tone your muscles and make you wiggle your butt very attractively when you walk."

~Girls Ask Guys~

A Word About Shoes

If you’re going to put a wiggle in your step, you’ve got to have the right shoes. Flip flops and Birkenstocks just won’t do. Stilettos are ideal, but if you just can’t walk in them or if they’re just too impractical for everyday use, no need to panic---your mid-heel or kitten heel will do just fine. The point is to own pretty heels, even if the heels are only an inch and a half high. Shoes should also fit well and be relatively comfortable, especially if you have to wear them all day at the office. Yes, the flats are practical, but they simply don’t promote that feeling of sexiness. On the other hand, beautiful high heeled shoes do wonders for a woman’s sensuality. We don’t know what it is, but they just make us feel “sexy.” So….dig out those high heels or better yet, buy some beautiful new heels. Either way, I guarantee that your gently swaying hips will garnish some overdue male attention.

Pretty kitten heels. Cute and sexy!
Pretty kitten heels. Cute and sexy!

What Is Your Sensual Quotient?

See results

Let the Beat of the Music Be Your Inspiration

Have you ever gotten ready for the day while enjoying music? If you haven’t, you’re missing out on a sensual and energizing experience. I’m not talking here about listening to the lyrics from “Let’s Get It On.” What I am suggesting is that you first buy yourself some really good speakers. (I prefer Bose products), if you don’t already have some. Next of all, you might want to select music that has an ethereal, sensual element about it. You can find some excellent songs Pandora radio or Spotify.

Sexy Back

Choose music that speaks to you. So if you need something extra peppy and sexy to get your body moving, you might consider Justin Timberlake's "Sexy Back." After all, that is exactly what this article is all about. Furthermore, nobody (except maybe your pet) will see you getting a little “crazy” with your dance moves---well, unless you want someone to.....

Yep. It’s just you and your body enjoying the beat of the music, between swipes of mascara and dabs of lipstick. Not only will the rhythm brighten your mood first thing in the morning, the beat will also make you feel pretty darn sensual---and that's just what we're aiming for. I highly recommend this little trick. Believe me when I say it works wonders for the spirit.

Too Much Efficiency, Not Enough Sexy

This "efficient" style lacks sex-appeal! Back to the drawing board for this pretty lady.
This "efficient" style lacks sex-appeal! Back to the drawing board for this pretty lady.

Please Do Something With That Hair!

Have you been wearing the same tired hair-do for the past 15 years? Have you replaced going to the hair salon with a monthly box of Clairol? Have you been (god forbid) cutting your own hair? Do you have that over-bleached or, worse yet, the "mousy brown" hair thing going on? If so, then it is high time you decided to do something about that very unsexy hair of yours. Beautiful, shiny, well-cut hair, that compliments your face shape, is one of the best ways to begin feeling sexier. In fact, you cannot do without good hair if you want to be a sensual woman. And remember, it is imperative that you and your hair dresser choose a color that best suits your complexion.

Now We're Talking!

A medium bob. Simple, but sexy...and the color suits her complexion perfectly!
A medium bob. Simple, but sexy...and the color suits her complexion perfectly!

Maybe you've always wanted to be an auburn haired beauty or a warm blond. If so, discuss your vision with a good stylist. He or she would love to give you some great advice. That's what a good hairdresser does! And one more thing---if the stylist you're currently seeing isn't making you look gorgeous, you need to find a new one. Here's a tip: Find a hair stylist who is usually booked six weeks in advance. There is a good reason why these professionals are so popular. They know they're doing and needless to say, they're almost always worth the wait! Personally, I've had the greatest success with stylists who rent their own chairs. Also, they generally don't charge as much as the expensive salons with the pretentious names.

The key to getting a good hair cut is to share your vision with the stylist. Just remember, your relationship with a good hair professional is a two-way street. If they are proficient at what they do, you need to listen to them as well. Congratulations, you are now on your way to having gorgeous hair!

A woman who has turned her full hips into a sexy asset.
A woman who has turned her full hips into a sexy asset.

Draw Attention To Your "Unusual" Strengths

Funny thing is, what you think you don't have could turn out to be one of your greatest assets. Do you think you're a little wide around the hips? Nonsense. Curves are making a comeback! What you need to do is to bravely wear your skirts much more fitted than you have ever dared. If you must buy the spanks to flatten the tummy---so be it. And while your're at it, make sure you find a skirt with a tiny slit, for added fun! Fitted (not tight) clothing definitely goes a long way toward making a woman feel deliciously sensual.

And now a word about your facial features. I hear women saying, "Oh, but my nose is too big or too long." Well, that's just plain silly. Everyone knows that the nose is what gives the face character. A so-called "big" nose actually makes you look more interesting, in a good way. Your long nose is something to be proud of! It sets you apart in one way, but in another way, it lets people recognize your ancestry.

The truth is, there is something very appealing about a person who feels good about their supposed flaws. It's called confidence, and confidence is always sexy. Barbara Streisand would never think of altering her beautiful schnozz. And why would she---it's practically made her famous. Well, Okay, her immense talent gave her incredible fame, but we all agree----her nose is perfect for her and she looks sensual wearing it as well as she does. My point is this: Take a cue from Barbara. Learn to love your imperfections.

Barbara Streisand. She makes her unique nose work for her. Not to mention, she has beautiful hands!
Barbara Streisand. She makes her unique nose work for her. Not to mention, she has beautiful hands!
Bust of Cleopatra
Bust of Cleopatra

Another seductive woman who would never let her larger than average nose get in the way of her enticing self was Cleopatra. She managed to seduce both Julius Ceasar and Mark Antony, two powerful Roman leaders. Yet Greek historian Plutarch, maintains that “her beauty was in itself not altogether incomparable, nor such as to strike those who saw her."

Likewise, Plutarch states that conversation with Cleopatra “had an irresistible charm, and her presence, combined with the persuasiveness of her discourse and the character which was somehow diffused about her behavior towards others, had something stimulating about it.”

In other words, her immense charm outweighed her less than perfect features.

You're Never Too Old...

I'm sorry? Did I just hear you say you're too old to be sensual? Please do not let me hear you say that again. Ever heard of a woman by the name of Ernestine Shepard? If you haven't, it's high time you did. Ernestine is an American bodybuilder---one of the oldest competitive bodybuilder's in the world. She's also a marathon runner, and as of 2016, she is 80 years old. That's right---eighty! Furthermore, she's gorgeous, and she has sensuality coming out of her armpits.

So the next time you find yourself whining about your age, you had better stop that foolishness and begin realizing that you can maintain your sensuality if you put your mind to it. Well, alright then, now that you know the truth of the matter---get up off of that couch and start doing some push-ups. The girl-kind will do very nicely, thank you very much!

Ernestine Shepard. Professional body builder and a woman who is very, very sexy.
Ernestine Shepard. Professional body builder and a woman who is very, very sexy.

Not only can you be a sensual woman, but you can also be a fit woman. Ernestine Shepard was not always athletic. In fact, she was a middle aged, pudgy woman who hated the way she looked in a swim suit. She decided to do something about it. She joined a gym and she took baby steps, until one day, someone recommended that she try lifting weights.

That did it. Ernestine's life has never been the same since---and the same can be true for you. Frankly, it is much easier to imagine engaging in amorous activities when we feel "buff." The great news is that even one session of exercise can actually "trick" us into feeling like we're in better shape already! It's a matter of finding the right "exercise fit." Once you begin seeing results, there will be no stopping you---you sexy woman you!

According to How Stuff Works, "In one study of almost 13,000 subjects, individuals with the highest levels of anger had twice the risk of coronary artery disease and three times the risk of heart attack, as compared to the subjects with the lowest levels of anger.

Some scientists think that chronic anger may be more dangerous than smoking and obesity as a factor that will contribute to early death."

Let Go of The Anger, For Your Own Sake

Anger isn't sexy. Turn your anger into a spirit of generosity. Allow calm into your life. Make that choice and make it today. By the way, exercise is ideal for alleviating stress. Exercise increases something called norepinephrine, a chemical that moderates our response to stress, and as we all know, exercise also releases endorphins which cause us to feel happier.

Yes, the world feels like a crazy place much of the time. We are bombarded with horrific news on a daily basis; nevertheless, our anxiety isn't going to solve the worlds' problems. Not one hungry child will benefit from our unhappiness, so for goodness sake, give happiness a chance for yourself. There is still so much to be thankful for. Stop to savor your blessings, for they are there to make you calm and contented. And needless to say, your new-found joy will do wonders for your sex life!

Sexy Is Not Sexist!

Before anyone gets "up-in-arms" about high heels, pretty hair, swaying hips and who knows what else, just know that men want to feel sexy too. Men get in a slump just like women do. One of the funniest movies out there, "The Full Monty," captures this truth quite beautifully. Although the film is about six unemployed steel workers, who decide to put on a Chippendale type dance act to raise badly needed funds, the underlying message of the film is about six men with little-to-no confidence in themselves or their sex-appeal, and how they manage to get their self-esteem and their "sexy" back.

The point is---we do what we gotta do. When all is said and done, our sensuality belongs in our lives and it is up to each individual to find a way to recover his or her sensual self without wasting time on thoughts of "sexism."

A great scene from, The Full Monty.

A Final Word

Whether you find your sensual self through music, meditation, physical activity or in any other way, the important thing is to come to love your sensuality. In opening up all of your physical senses, you will also learn to savor a delicious meal, slowly, and with ample time for conversation; you will appreciate the clean smell of a spring day after the rain; you'll give in to the sensation of licking the whipped cream off of your café macchiato; and naturally, you will relish the sensual joy of massaging your lover's body with essential oils. There are so many ways to open up all of your senses to the physical world. It only takes some imagination and the willingness to let your spirit guide the way.

Lastly, this article is meant to promote balance. Women know, intrinsically, that her sensuality has nothing to do with "sex on demand." Rather, her sensuality is, quite simply and beautifully, an intrinsic part of who she is. Her sensuality is a gift....

And one more thing---never forget that laughter is sexy too!

Always....Savvy

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  • savvydating profile image
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    Yves 4 months ago

    LOL! I think having bigger than average "curves" is coming around due to plus model activist's like Ashley Graham, who are fighting back against body shaming. At least, I hope so. But seriously, I do see more acceptance, though it is an uphill battle. Thank you for stopping by, Carolyn!

  • Carolyn M Fields profile image

    Carolyn Fields 4 months ago from the USA

    So you say that curves are back? Thank God!

  • savvydating profile image
    Author

    Yves 4 months ago

    Hi Suzanne....So true that confidence is key. Although some may deny it, looking our best on the outside really helps to build up our confidence on the inside. That's where your idea about updating an outfit comes in handy. Great tip!

    So nice to have you drop by. Have a wonderful weekend, and don't forget to smile back at your admirers! It will make their day.

  • Suzanne Day profile image

    Suzanne Day 4 months ago from Melbourne, Victoria, Australia

    I really agree with all of this, especially the sensual self part! But the easiest way to get your spark back is just update an outfit to feel sexy, then go show it off somewhere and use any admiring glances to cheer up and get on with your sensual life! I also notice that confidence can play a huge part in reigniting a spark - confidence in living your life well and making good decisions with it makes you feel independent, worthy and Number #1.

    I totally agree that self love is key to feeling powerful, and therefore sexy.

  • savvydating profile image
    Author

    Yves 6 months ago

    Lol, Taze. Did you not read about Ernestine? But true, I did not overly stress physical fitness. As a middle aged woman, I can relate to how Ernestine felt before she began exercising. Consequently, my goal is to help women 'of a certain age' to contemplate exercising once again. Silly man. I am glad you are physically fit, but you are no girl. However, you are an awesome man.....most of the time. ;)

  • Dont Taze Me Bro profile image

    Banned cause of pissants promisem and deantraylor 6 months ago from TWO OF THE MANY LYING LIB CRYBABIES OF HUB PAGES

    I wish to join the men who have commented on your hub Ives and say excellent work, although being a man what do I know? I will say one thing I know from my own personal experience that I think you neglected to mention is physical fitness.

    Maybe it is different for women but take me for example. Just my guess but if you were to ask any woman who has met me they would say I am the epitome of sensual sparkle! Just my guess but if I had to attribute that to any one thing it would be my dedication to physical fitness.

    Every morning I get up at dawn and run ten times around the block. Then I slide the block back under my bed and go to sleep until noon. Sleep is important but so is my physical strength. I started building my strength up by taking a ten lb. potato sack in each hand and holding them out at arms length until I can can hold that for 5 minutes. Once I achieved that I did the same thing with a 25 lb. sack and then a 50 lb. sack.

    Now I'm at the point where I can start over only this time a put a potato in the 10 lb. sack.

    I think that is a routine any woman can do! Who says men are stronger than women?

  • savvydating profile image
    Author

    Yves 6 months ago

    You certainly didn't look "fat and slouchy" in your theatre pictures. But I understand. Most women, myself included, feel that way more often than we should. LOL. But yes, I love Shakira, too. Is she not the cutest thing? Nell, I am so glad you find the hub is inspiring! That makes me feel happy. Yay!

    P.S. I'm pretty sure your husband approves of your sashaying around the house. (wink, wink)

  • Nell Rose profile image

    Nell Rose 6 months ago from England

    I came back to give me a buzz! lol! I am feeling very fat and slouchy, so I thought I would get some inspiration! LOL! love Shakira! got some of her CDs, I dance round the room to them! now to get my sashay back!

  • savvydating profile image
    Author

    Yves 10 months ago

    Ha! You're the funniest lady. The real reason we can both laugh is because what you said isn't true. Also, I'm pretty sure your husband still sees the young, sexy Nell he always knew. :)

  • Nell Rose profile image

    Nell Rose 10 months ago from England

    The last time a guy found me sexy was around the time the dinosaurs died out, but hey i will give it a try! LOL!

  • Laurinzo Scott profile image

    Live To Write 13 months ago from Phoenix, Az.

    This hub is not just for women; but maybe for men too, who want to explore the more complex of the sexes... the Mystery that is woman...

  • Ashish Dadgaa profile image

    Ashish Dadgaa 13 months ago

    This is motivation to the ladies who thinks that they lost their sexiness and alluring charm. Your article can boost confidence in any lady. This article can give a feeling of 25-year old's feeling to 50-year-old lady.

  • savvydating profile image
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    Yves 14 months ago

    Like the old adage, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder." Thanks for visiting, nnms.

  • nnms profile image

    Seiboi Misao 14 months ago from India

    It appears that everything could be turn into sexy based on individual differences. I think it is equally important from the eye of the observer as well as the observed what makes the sensuality works.

  • savvydating profile image
    Author

    Yves 15 months ago

    It's never too late to put the sway back in your hips. Get the music box out and start moving your body for all it's worth. Then treat yourself to something pretty to wear. I am glad this hub article was useful, Carol. Thank you for stopping by!

  • Carol Morris profile image

    Carol Morris 15 months ago

    Thanks for this. I've been feeling so not sexy lately, maybe this will get me back to my old (younger) self ;)

  • savvydating profile image
    Author

    Yves 19 months ago

    For real, Nell. Ernestine Shepard has it "all going on." Well, I'm glad you're willing to get some wiggle back in your jiggle. Ha! But I hear you loud and clear---as we get older, the sexy thing isn't as high a priority as it used to be....and that's ok too, so long as we don't get too blasé or "dumpy." And yes, I love The Full Monty. It's one of my favorite comedy movies ever!!!

  • Nell Rose profile image

    Nell Rose 19 months ago from England

    I love it! and yes we have lost that 'thing' if you like, I know I have. so yep out comes the sensual clothes and I am out there! and yes I do moan about age, but after seeing that awesome woman above, well, how I can I moan about that? as for the Full Monty, that clip is one of my favorites!

  • savvydating profile image
    Author

    Yves 20 months ago

    Ms. Dora....Ernestine ROCKS! I agree that she is an inspiration to us middle aged gals. I secretly believe that young women admire her too.

    I wrote this hub for myself as well as others. Sometimes I have to remember to take my own advice. Lol.

    So glad you got a lift from this article, and thanks for the compliment. Yay!

  • MsDora profile image

    Dora Isaac Weithers 20 months ago from The Caribbean

    Right on, Savvy! I needed this. Thanks for the facts about Ernestine Shepard; she's an inspiration to us older women. Your article gives a lift to our self-confidence and our sexuality capabilities. Well done!

  • savvydating profile image
    Author

    Yves 21 months ago

    Hi Frank. Yes indeed. New Year's Eve is just around the corner. No better time for women to get their "swivel" on! Thanks for visiting!

  • Frank Atanacio profile image

    Frank Atanacio 21 months ago from Shelton

    women listen up.. a great hub to kick off the new year!!!

  • savvydating profile image
    Author

    Yves 21 months ago

    Thanks Flourish Anyway! I know these methods work because I've used all of them. Sometimes I get into the doldrums a bit, and I have to take my own advice. Ha! It's always s pleasure to have you drop by. BTW, it took my computer forever to load your recent hub. Strange, but it was worth the wait!

  • FlourishAnyway profile image

    FlourishAnyway 21 months ago from USA

    What an excellent, inspiring hub for anyone who needs encouragement to feel great about themselves again.

  • savvydating profile image
    Author

    Yves 21 months ago

    Amen to all you said with regard to our doing these "pampering" things for ourselves. That's the real reason I continue to make the effort, as well.....and If I can get a head to turn---bonus! I also agree 100% that it's just so darn fun being a woman. And you know, fpher48, it makes me awfully happy that some men are benefiting from this hub as well. I adore good men! (Don't we all) As for the sweats, oh yes---my couch & I can't do without them. Thanks for adding to the discussion. I knew I'd left something out. ;)

  • fpherj48 profile image

    Paula 21 months ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

    savvy....In many ways, this is a favorite topic of mine. Not so much toward the specifically "sexy" side, but with that in mind, I have always felt it vital to be all the "woman" we can be. Am I sexist? No, not at all. However, I've always been quite pleased and proud to BE a woman and never hesitate to take advantage of the benefits. (I'm not clarifying that remark)

    You've done a marvelous job on this article...nearly perfect girlfriend!

    Being 100 % honest, how I "appear" to others, men included of course, is actually a secondary concern of mine. My efforts and attention are for me. I simply feel so much better, happier, more relaxed & confident when I've taken the time & energy to like the reflection in the mirror. I don't believe that's vanity at all. It's more a self-care/pampering sort of thing.

    Even when I'm tired or not feeling well, I will force myself to take time for the outside of me, just because it perks up the inner me.

    Truth be told, I also have no problem hanging out in sweats and heavy socks with no frills or extras....especially now that I live alone! LOL. My dog & cat love me anyway!

    You always present an interesting topic.( We may need to send Jodah's wife a note of "warning!!" LOL)

  • savvydating profile image
    Author

    Yves 21 months ago

    Hi Jodah.....I originally wanted to include men and women equally (more or less) in this hub, but I feared the article might get too discombobulated. I think it's funny that I get more comments from men than from women as of late, but hey....I love my guys here, so it kinda works for me! LOL. Nevertheless, I hope to help some women somewhere along the way, too.

    Hope you had a chance to watch the "Full Monty" scene, where the six guys were practicing their dance moves. It's one of my favorite scenes ever! Thank you for visiting my site, Jodah. I really appreciate it and I appreciate you even more.

    BTW, if it's easier, just call me Savvy!

  • Jodah profile image

    John Hansen 21 months ago from Queensland Australia

    I know this article may have been primarily aimed at women Savvydating, but I see you have more comments by men at the moment. It is a great hub and you offer very sound advice. We all need to get that "sensual sparkle" back in our lives..both men and women..and no you are never too old. Age is just a number and believe me mine is a pretty big number, but after reading this I feel sexier already.. Thank you.

  • savvydating profile image
    Author

    Yves 21 months ago

    Lol.... "Sway Inspector," indeed! I love it! As always, you have left me the most charming comment, dear mckbirdbks. You could probably write a superb article on "How To Be a Charming Gentleman Whom Women Love." Yes, it feels good to be writing again after my rather lengthy hiatus. :)

  • savvydating profile image
    Author

    Yves 21 months ago

    You Go, Girlfriend!! I'm not surprised. You've always had a sparkling attitude. Just loved your comment and I hope others take the time to read it, as well. I haven't paid your site a visit in a while. I'll plan on seeing what your up to in DDE land in the near future. Thanks for stopping by!

  • mckbirdbks profile image

    mckbirdbks 21 months ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

    Hello Savvy. I liked the light touch you sprinkled throughout this article. You present you ideas here with a classy style and positive bounce. I am sure those that stop by and read this will leave feeling more confident in themselves. Now here is where I normally would say something funny but I have to go add 'Sway Inspector' to my resume.

    Good to see you writing.

  • DDE profile image

    Devika Primić 21 months ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

    I voted ''I feel sparkly and sensual most of the time!'' I wear good clothing everyday. You are so right! Some women don't care after marriage and after kids come along. I remained the opposite to that. Age to me is just a number. I don't feel it and I ain't gonna let that get in my head. There are those negative people who feel I should behave older than I feel but I don't because life is meant to be enjoyed and dressing up daily is my way of feeling great. I maintained my spark in staying alive.

  • savvydating profile image
    Author

    Yves 21 months ago

    Thank you, dashingscorpio. I've no doubt that some men (and women) cheat because nothing is going on at home---so to speak. Nevertheless, I'll never approve of porn under any circumstances. But yes, we have to keep the flames alive. I believe, deep down, everybody wants to feel sexy and or/sensual, but somewhere along the way, some unlucky partners forget how----or they just grow too discouraged to try. I hope this article helps both men and women to take the needed steps to feel sexy again! Thanks for stopping by with your very thoughtful comment!

  • dashingscorpio profile image

    dashingscorpio 21 months ago

    Excellent article!

    Being sexy and feminine are no longer valued traits by many women in the U.S. when it comes to being in long-term relationships and marriages.

    They primarily use that only when they are single and looking for a mate.

    However I believe it's even more important to keep that aspect alive when you are in a committed relationship. Not only do men wish their wives or significant others displayed more sexual appeal but they also would like to feel truly desired by them.

    I suspect one of the reasons why a lot of men are attracted to strip clubs and pornography websites is they are sold {the illusion} that these women crave and desire men. While their own wives or significant other behave as if they have no interest in sex and discourage them from flirting or using sexual innuendo with them.

    Some women have been known to reject their mate's sexual advances because they themselves don't feel sexy. One would think they'd really feel that way once their men stop making advances!

    It's easier to maintain a fire than it is to reignite a spark!

    Embracing one's sexiness is displaying confidence!