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How To Know if a Man Truly Loves You

Updated on June 1, 2014

How to know when a man truly loves you

Because of the nature of human, which can be traced to creation, it is often difficult for us to know exactly when our partner truly love us or not, however, certain modalities aside love spells, stand as a good test to determine how much love our partner have for us at a given time and circumstance. I am quite sure that sometimes in our lives, we have been stocked in the middle of a relationship, not knowing what to do, whether to move front or to go back; our mind is just confused on what to do or what not to do. This always arise as a result of either insecurity of the mind or past negative experiences, which often leads to the destruction of trust in people thereby making it difficult for us to ascertain the veracity of our partner’s love for us.

Have you been wondering and bordering if that man or guy you are dating loves you? Now is the right time for you to know exactly if he truly loves you or not. I know by now, you are pondering in your heart; what is this guy going to talk about that I have not heard in the past? But I tell you, relax! All you need to do at this time is to adjust your reading glasses, take a whooping sip from your juice drink, and then clear your brains off every doubt, then read on.

This article will let you know if that guy truly loves you, or if he is moving around sleeping with other girls in town and fooling you with the words "I love you". All these knowledge are for free, just because you are eager to help your relationship excel. Now that you are prepared to know the truth, I would like to ask you few questions: Is your mind ready to explore some twenty-first century secrets to knowing playboys? Is your mind clear from doubts? Do you believe that two types of love exist- true love and fake love? If you answered 'yes' to the above questions, then follow me, but before we proceed, I want you to make a promise that you will never let him know you sneaked out with me to attend a lesson on this topic, oops! You know why? Because he may get me jailed for life for letting you know these secrets, and then, how will I continue my hobby of helping ladies become happy in their relationships?

I am also aware that some good girls are out there seeking desperately to find a man that will truly love them. If you are one of such amazing ladies, don't lose faith yet, you can still find love, how?

Cast a love spell that really works

If you are yet to find love, and you would like to cast a love spell to increase your chances of connecting with your true love, you can cast one for free. To cast a free love spell that works immediately, go here.

Back to how to know if a man truly loves you

Now, I want to let this heaven loose by the way…firstly, I tell you, if a guy truly loves you, definitely, his feelings must be clearly reflected in his behaviors, expressions, passion and actions alike. But if he doesn't reflect his love for you through these mediums, ha-ha… he might be one of those playboys. Anyway, don't judge him yet, to avoid jumping into a hasty decision which might turn out to be a generalization fallacy. Be patient.

One obvious sign to look out for when a guy truly loves you is: his dressing style. When a guy truly loves you, his dressing style will change from his usual awkward dressing style to your favorite. Now examine this little change; before you met him, how does he usually dress? Is he that kind of guy that cares less about the way he dress? Or the type that just put on whatever he lays his hands upon in the name of wearing a clothe? If yes, then how much has this shabby dressing habit changed since you entered into a committed relationship with him? Is his dressing style now okay and impressive, both to you and your friends who used to complain of his mode of dressing in the past?

Secondly, how often does he glance at you secretly, especially when he knows that you're not aware, which you will must times catch him doing? If a guy likes you, he will always love to steal a glance at you to appreciate what he believes he has, especially when you are not aware, which you may often catch him doing, and if eventually you caught him, does he usually shift his eyes in an effort to avoid you noticing that he was looking at you, or does he just frown at you? This is another good sign of knowing that a guy truly loves you, or he's genuinely admiring you.

Thirdly, how readily is he to offer you help in times of trouble? For instance, whenever you get entrapped in a particular sort of problem- emotional, financial, physical, etc, does he sit back and just watch you suffer in pains or does he offer his hand for help; a good sign of true love.

Find out if your man truly loves you via psychic readings

What is psychic reading? It is a way of applying metaphysics to read into human psychology, which can also be applied in romance and love. Both love spell and psychic reading, operate on probability, chance and luck. Though there are effective love spells, but we cannot still ignore the fact that they are not 100% guaranteed, anyway, let us go back to our main topic: How to know if a man truly loves you as a lady.

Now, another way to know if a guy loves you is the level of communication. Observe his interest in communicating with you, how often he enjoys communicating with you is a good determinant of how much he truly connects with you. Guys love chatting with people they love, especially the opposite sex, as a fact, a guy that loves you, will always love to discuss one thing or the other with you. He will like to share with you, stories and events that took place while you weren't around. But if he always observe carefully, his words and language whenever he is with you, he is using vocabulary English, refined and carefully selected words, probably, he doesn't love you as much as you think.

Remember, if a guy truly loves you, he will definitely loves or enjoy to chat with you just the same way he chats with his best male friends, which includes the use of slangs, jargons and all the usual words he uses when chatting with his best friends, except, the rude ones. So if he selects words and probably speak phonetics just because you are around, be careful, he is up to something, may be he's trying to deceive you with the impression that he is a Mr. Right.

Again, how does he react to your moods? Is he happy when you are happy? Or does he try to flame up your anger whenever he notices that you are angry? If he does, that is a bad sign, may be he does not love you, it may be a like. Don't forget a guy that loves you, would do anything within his reach to make you happy.

Go out with some other of your friends- male and female, hang out, chat with them, pretend you are ignoring him, and see if he's jealous about this, if he is, it is a clear indication of love. Please don't be fooled by such statements, “I am not a jealous lover” because every person that is in love, is always jealous, but not possessive, it is natural, not artificial, and it cannot be held back. But if you insist that you are not a jealous lover, and you are sure you love your partner, tell your partner to start going out with your friend or a neighbor, watch them kiss or exchange warm embrace, and then evaluate your feelings.

Another clear indication that a guy truly loves you is to evaluate how much he loves going out with you on a walk, with his friends, colleagues or even to religious worships. Definitely, if a guy doesn't love you, he won't be proud going out with you, he only enjoys spending time with you in the secret places like, bedrooms, hide outs, midnight or at corners. This may be for a reason, either that he is avoiding being spotted by someone else he is strongly in love with or admiring. Or he doesn't want other ladies to know that he is hooked up with someone, since he is just using you to while away his lonely times.

How readily does he tell his friends or relations about you? Does he hide your relationship with him from these people? If yes, he may not be in love with you, be careful.

Sometimes, guys act like dogs; they only focus on having sexual intercourse with the opposite sex, and then kicking them off like ball. So if a guy is curious about having sexual intercourse with you, don't be fooled, he doesn't love you at all.

Sex is not love and love is not sex. Rather, sex is a bond that bonds two partners in love, so no one can define exactly if sex is love or not, it all depends on the person's mind set which can be defined through his actions in the relationship. But a guy that loves you will always consider your emotions and feelings, he will never force you to have sex with him, and he will never request this at an onset of a relationship, rather he allows it to envelope gradually and naturally, it must, for sure, but that should be in marriage.

If a guy loves you, he likes to tell you about his past life, both the bad and the good ones, unless he has not yet developed trust in you. But if he has, he won't know when he will do this; guys are not much complicated like ladies.

Above all, we are all humans, which makes it impossible for us to read minds, yet, we can predict peoples’ minds through their actions. As a matter of fact, to know if a guy loves you or not, watch out for his actions and behaviors, and pay lesser attention to his words, psychic love spells employ this technique in reading peoples’ minds before casting a love spell. He might tell you ‘I love you’ a hundred times, and deep inside his mind, he is saying, ‘I don't think this girl is right for me.’

I want to also cease this opportunity to make it clear here that, a guy spending so much money and cash on you, doesn't necessarily depict that he truly loves you. So don't be fooled by material things, I believe you are bigger than that unless you are still out to catch fun with guys. Do you know that most rich guys believe on spend it, if you have it, so they spend it on any girl they wish to have at that moment, it has nothing to do with love. In order words, telling your friends, “he likes spending on me, I am madly in love with him and I know he is too” is a mere illusion and fallacy! Money has no reputable connection with true love and we cannot dispute financial assistance to partners in need from romantic relationships.

In conclusion, a guy that loves you, will always talk and brag about you, and even when he is with his friends, he will always try to raise topics about ladies, just to throw in some words to praise you. Therefore, do your best and get more acquainted with his best friends, to enable you learn more about him and how much he loves you, his friends are your best tool, get close to them but not intimate as most ladies end up doing, yet, I have no legal backing to stop you from searching for true love. But instead of indulging in same friends romance, why not find love elsewhere? If you really want a faster way of connecting with a man that will love you, try love spells, use the link I gave above to find out the best psychic.


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A SPECIAL MESSAGE TO ALL MY FANS AND READERS

I am planning to create a personal website where I can interact more easily with my fans and readers, and I need you guy's support to continue helping you guys....

By the special grace of God, I have been assisting so many ladies and men to fix their relationships through free counselling, consulting and even sending them free e-books, and counselling articles. I have taken so many risks for my readers and fans even though I haven't seen any...yet, posing danger to my personal welfare and life...I think it is time for me to ask you guys a little favor, that's if you guys don't see it as a bad thing anyway.

Till then....I wish you all a happy, lasting love life.


why men feel insecure with ladies

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    • profile image

      mamthembu 2 years ago

      thanx

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 2 years ago from L Island

      @Loyal_women, its quite unfortunate. I am not going to tell you stories, I am only going to tell you the truth- your boyfriend is mostly cheating on you and maybe looking forward to a break up with you.

      What to do? Develop a positive attitude with strong emotion focused on pursuing your life's goals- career, academic success....and make sure you have a hobby that keeps you happily busy when bored.

      As a single lady, the number one mistake you will ever make is building your life and happiness around a man. You can be happy with or without a man. Don't let your happiness and goals in life revolve around any man.

      Only you can make yourself happy.

      Get busy with your life, focus on becoming the best lady you can be in all you do and watch men of integrity run to you for love and care.

      For now, take care

    • profile image

      loyal_women 2 years ago

      Hi I have been dating this guy for 3 yrs things where rosey in the begining .and ever since I resigned to study full time its been hectic on the relationship. My boyfriend does not give me time , I dont know if he loves me. He spends most of his time wih friends.. going on weekends away and drinking. Too my suprise he has many girls as friends but this one specific one looks like his been cheating on me with her. Coz I mean if his not see8ng me in 2 months why would he wanna go an see a women that lives 2 blocks away from me.. he blames his financial probs not to have a relationship but chats to this slut tht slpt around all the tym.. his friend ha a fling with this girls sister and that how my bf befriended her ever since.. knowibgly he has a gf y wid she insist he come to c her drunk?? Plz help.

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 4 years ago from L Island

      A SPECIAL MESSAGE TO ALL MY FANS AND READERS

      I am planning to create a personal website where I can interact more easily with my fans and readers, and I need you guy's support to continue helping you guys....

      By the special grace of God, I have been assisting so many ladies and men to fix their relationships through free counselling, consulting and even sending them free e-books, and counselling articles. I have taken so many risks for my readers and fans even though I haven't seen any...yet, posing danger to my personal welfare and life...I think it is time for me to ask you guys a little favor, that's if you guys don't see it as a bad thing anyway.

      Till then....I wish you all a happy, lasting love life.

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 4 years ago from L Island

      Hello @tresa honijisa, I do not understand what you meant by the statement "he always tell me to rock on wood", can you elaborate more on what you meant?

      Meanwhile, it is wrong for you to move in with a guy you aren't legally married to. Though I don't know the common practice in your country, but it is wrong, and we guys don't always find it funny when a lady just falls so fast and dang, moves in...it gives the man a sense of desperateness, which will make him to judge you wrongly, so weigh it again and see if you could move out.

      Meanwhile, some guys are born introvert, and most times, it affects their relationship with the opposite sex...anyway, come back and explain more...let me understand you better. Try and construct your message well so I can understand you better please.

      Thanks for stopping by.

    • profile image

      tresa honijisa 4 years ago

      Hi,

      I have been with this guy for almost a year. He is very superstitious. Is know how I feel about him but he is always telling me to nock on wood. Then if I ask him why he told me to do it, he tells me not to ask. I even live with him we have been living together for 7 months. It just feels like he avoids talking about his feeling that he has or does not have for me. He has told me about his past and the girls that he has been with. some time I feel like he thing I'm going to do him wrong that they did to him. he tell me want happens at his work and the people he talks to and than the people he tries to avoid. I have told him the thing in my past and have not left any thing out. if he asks me I tell him what is the truth. How do I finger out how he feels? Please help me have some closure.

    • profile image

      tse 4 years ago

      Hi,

      I have been with this guy for almost a year. He is very superstitious. Is know how I feel about him but he is always telling me to nock on wood. Then if I ask him why he told me to do it, he tells me not to ask. I even live with him we have been living together for 7 months. It just feels like he avoids talking about his feeling that he has or does not have for me. He has told me about his past and the girls that he has been with. some time I feel like he thing I'm going to do him wrong that they did to him. he tell me want happens at his work and the people he talks to and than the people he tries to avoid. I have told him the thing in my past and have not left any thing out. if he asks me I tell him what is the truth. How do I finger out how he feels? Please help me have some closure.

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 4 years ago from L Island

      @sweta, first, I must apologize for my late response, please do forgive me. Back to your story dear...please don't commit to that guy...he has multiple personality disorder...and you have said it all.....you truly understand him, so be careful.

    • profile image

      sweta 4 years ago

      and one more thing sir...i feel like he always want to feel superior n it seems that he feels inferior than me if i break up with him by myself...he always wants to feel up;higher than me...,so if i break up with him he cries and beg to be with me and after i get consoled by him,some sudden day he just seek reason to break up with me,if i explain about it that its just misunderstanding than he reacts as he dont want to listen me and my words,he even doesnot respond to my calls..and i think that he has ego problem not a love thing inside him..if it was love than he would listen to me..and i strongley feel that he doesnt beg to stay with me doe to his love,its just because he fell inferior that a girl dumped him so after some days he finds a nonsense reason to quarrel with me n he dumps me..now after knowing all these sir,please can you just mention what you feel about this guy..if i ask to my freinds than they speaks in the fqvour of me and if i speak to the member of his circle than they tell me to understand him..so i am in puzzle...i dont want my life to be ruined like this..please suggest me what you feel that it correct for me and my life...i have lot of things to do in life so i dont want to get stucked with a guy who even dont have the sense of humanity for me..i tolerated a lot,i tolerated his playboy kind of deeds for almost 2 long years..and now i dont have that strong heart even to tolerate his single scream..so please help me out sir..i am suffocating...i just cant understand him,please sir can you just figure out what is better for me because i am going to decide a decission about our brittle relationship..

    • profile image

      sweta 4 years ago

      First of all i am really grateful to you sir..yeah you are 100 and 20% true..whatever you suggested me its good..and i wondered how you knew the exact matter of the problem in my relationship..i must say you are great sir,no one can know the fact and suggest the entire thing just by reading 7 lines in a paragraph but you got me and my comment correctly and suugessted and told some genuine thing..thank you a lot sir..once again..actually sir i thought to break up with him before 3weeks and i did..after i broke up with him..he was calling me frequently because he cannot meet me as we are in long distance relationship,actually i am in bangalore,india now...i study here..; and i didnt responded his calls and finally he started to drink like hell and do drunkard stuffs like accident and all..he cried and yelled with me for 1 long week..and i suddenly remembered ur words that " though ,he may fall genuinely in love with you in the process when he discovers he has no other option but you" and now i am cock sure that he genuinely fell for me..i can make it out when he cried in phone and i too remembered his past deeds..after being in relationship with me he had cheated me several times, so m sure that he was tring to find a proper gal for him himself and till that he was killing his time as u said..and finally he felt that he couldnt get better than me,like no better option than me so he stayed with me in relationship and now he loves me genuinely..... And after mentioning these entire things infront of you..sir its my humble request to reply and suggest me one more time..i want to ask you sir...is it good to move on my life with this guy ?? is it good for me to have future with this guy??

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 4 years ago from L Island

      Hello @sweta, I am sorry for the delay in responding to your comment, I have been so busy.

      But listen to me carefully, he doesn't love you! There is no two ways about it, he is probably using you to kill time. He loves the Chinese girl that abandoned him but he doesnt want to feel empty right now, so he just want you to stick around to keep him emotionally going for the moment until he finds love.

      Though, he may fall genuinely in love with you in the process when he discovers he has no other option but you, but are you ready to wait and gamble with your feelings? Thats a question you have to answer.

      Finally, he may like you but he hasn't figured out his emotional direction in life, be careful of such guys because they are not trustworthy.

      Goodluck, and I hope this helped? You can always come back for more counsel. Take care dear.

    • profile image

      sweta 4 years ago

      why are you not replying sir i posted a comment before about my problem please help me out soon..i just want to move on with the life which is good for me.

    • profile image

      sweta 4 years ago

      i am from nepal.and i seriously love my boyfreind but i a, not sure wether he loves me or not..he alwz use slang words to me..he had relationship with chinese girl for almost 4 yrs so upto my knowledge he has become little bit psycho after breaking up with her and some how he impose me his frustion each and every day..and some time wen he is drunk he cries and say that i love you and please dont go away from me..n i cant live without you..now please help me my suggesting..what should i do??

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 4 years ago from L Island

      @nour nour, it is good that you cherish your cousin and he cherishes you too, but don't you think it is wrong for you to be having a romantic attraction for your own cousin? To me, it is not a good practice, and besides, you two are still very tender, why not wait till you turn 18 and above? Just my own suggestion, and please avoid physical contact with him and any other male because you are still very tender, and any mistake you make now could lead you to an unwanted teenage pregnancy which would definitely mar your education.

      Please tread carefully, we all at Hubpages love you.

    • profile image

      nour nour 4 years ago

      i am frome alexandria egypt. i am12 years and i love my cousin he is 14

      i think that he loves me my mother and my bff told my this i feel maybe because they are many reasons that makes me feel maybe 80% he loves me he triet me wonderfully and everytime wants to talk with me and wants to see me at my computer camer and said that i 'm cute and pretty and i'm the kindest girl ever he have been met.

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 4 years ago from L Island

      Hello Harsh Sndhu, I am sorry to tell you that he doesn't truly love and believe in you. He is unsure of what he feels for you because if he is certain that he loves you, he wouldn't dare proposing marriage to another girl, to even talk of a girl you know...he isn't the one for you, watch it.

      Thanks for sharing your story, I hope my comment did answered your question? If not, let me know, wouldn't mind providing a clearer answer. Take care for now.

    • profile image

      Harsh Sandhu 4 years ago

      hey what to do if ur man proposes some other gal and then comes back to you nd says that he did that by mistake ..... he wont repeat that again, nd the gal whum he proposed also caled me to tell me that my man just loves me nd nt her then what to do ???

      still my man says that she s my best friend nd whwn i told him , u wont talk to her then he said i ll luk into it

    • accofranco profile image
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      accofranco 4 years ago from L Island

      @webwatcher, I have an ebook on relationship already. And it will be okay, I wouldn't mind guest-writing for a website, there is joy in exploring life.

      Thanks @Stellar Phoenix

    • profile image

      Stellar Phoenix 4 years ago

      This website is incredible! You obviously know how to keep a reader happy. Between your wit and your awesome content, I was almost moved to start my own blog (well, almost..ahaha) Fantastic job. I really loved what you had to say, and more than that, how you presented it. Too cool! Stellar Phoenix

    • profile image

      Stellar Phoenix 4 years ago

      This website is spectacular! You certainly know how to keep a reader happy. Between your wit and your awesome content, I was almost moved to start my own blog (well, almost..haha) Excellent job. I really loved what you had to say, and more than that, how you presented it. Too cool! Stellar Phoenix Review

    • profile image

      WebWatcher 4 years ago

      Have you ever thought about publishing an e-book or guest authoring on other blogs? I have a blog based upon on the same topics you discuss and would really like to have you share some stories/information. I know my visitors would appreciate your work. If you're even remotely interested, feel free to shoot me an email.

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 5 years ago from L Island

      @DDE, thanks for that contribution, and may I also add that he would be your best friend and not just your lover....thanks for stopping by DDE

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      If a man truly loves you he will be by your side no matter what

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 5 years ago from L Island

      Please if you decide to try any of the people claiming to have a reliable love spell, you are doing that at your own risk, please do not blame any failure on this article.

      Stay safe, don't try unreliable things. Thanks

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 5 years ago from L Island

      @HeyriyaH , I understand how you feel dear, but then you must learn to let your past be a past and focus more on the future...and remember, we all are born with varied share of imperfection, which makes us imperfect beings working towards perfection. What then am I trying to say? Give him some time, and don't expect him to always be nice, cool, awesome, amazing cos he is a human and if he starts being nice all the time, then he is hiding his true self from you for a purpose best known to him alone. So expect some mood fluctuations from him, likewise he should expect from you and then you two grow and understand yourselves better and gradually overcome your challenges. I wish you all the best dear...and do take care of yourself and feel relaxed okay? Bye for now, you can get back to me anytime for further assistance.

    • profile image

      HeyriyaH 5 years ago

      A reallly good site to weather v got a ryt person wit whom v can decide our fut....i was in a relationship fa two whole yrs I was a gal who believed he s everything fr me but my fate he was wit me fa nthing else oda than cash but after this I met a guy in my coll who became a good friend of mine very decent , caring nd trust worthy after knowing my past he was ready to accept me as wat I am no matter wat others (friends) said I broke up wit the oda guy he then asked me weather I can marry him I accepted his proposal Nw we r in a relationship frm 3mnths he always want me to smile he cant bear tears fallng frm my eyes as u mentioned above he changed his dressing style fa me, he admires me every now nd then, gets jealous of my friends ,vERY VERY POSSESIVE , inspite of all this some tyms he gets very rude does nt even speak a word as u said he use this local words as he speak wit his frenz as I said he gets mood of he listens to everything I tel at tyms he doesnt listen a word so am getting scared weathr he s true or no as my past relation cheated me m nt able to trust him pls pls pls reply fa this I really need confdence abt my relationship

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 5 years ago from L Island

      @lunamar , to be honest with you, that guy isn't for real, just be careful because he is in for a fun and not for a commitment. That's all I can say for now. Sorry for my late reply, I had been too busy. Thanks for stopping by.

    • profile image

      lunamar 5 years ago

      Hello! I am lookin for some advice regarding this long distance relationship I have been in during these past two years. I'll start by saying that he has never asked me to come visit him. Every time we see each other is at my place. I don't even know his address when I did ask for it I was told I didn't need it. A few months back I told him I knew his address and that I might just surprise him one day, his reply was "I suggest you don't do that, n if u do show up you'll be dead to me, literally." Those were his exact words. I did ask as to why I can't come see him after these 2 years n he said he is a very private person and doesn't bring females home, he said if he was to bring anyone home he would feel as if his world is coming to an end. I still feel that there is something else going on. He barely calls, he says there is no need to communicate so much that not communicating would only make our time together much better because we will have much more to talk about. I can truly say this situation is eating me up inside as I am in love with this man, I have invested my time, trust, and have given him the best of me. What are ur thoughts?

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 5 years ago from L Island

      @alizay dearie, pls don't feel upset or hurt with my counsel...I want the best for you okay? but to answer your question, it is difficult to know when a teenage boy truly loves a girl....because at his age, there moods and emotion are always fluctuating...which makes it hard to figure out...all the best dear, and pls don't feel upset okay? I am sorry if my advice did hurt you, pls forgive and forget. take care.

    • profile image

      alizay 5 years ago

      i do agree with u but like i said u'r not getting it i dont want to noe if i can have a realtionship with him i just simply wanna noe if he likes me thts it, actually , nothing more and i would also like to put this under ur knowledge that he is content, whtev he does, he was liking a girl before me for the previous 2 years i guess and he even knew she didnt like him actually hated him but it didnt affect the way he felt, if u get me.... wht im trying to say is that simply does the way he behaves show that he likes me or not ? thats all i want to noe and im not looking forward to a relationship just so u noe :)

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 5 years ago from L Island

      @alizay, pls I must first apologize to you and other commentors for my late response, it's cos of my new job role, pls do bear with me.

      Firsty alizay, you guys are too young to engage in a romantic relationship. that said, you must bear in mind that the boy is still a teen, and teens do undergo certain periods in their lives that they like to be alone, away from everybody, and such moments occur more frequently in teenage boys of his age; I guess his age falls within 14 - 16? and for this reason and more, it is not advisable for teenagers to engage in romantic relationships because heart break and misunderstandings are more likely and frequent. Remember, it is not his fault but a natural process which he must undergo. Loving a girl committedly is never his priority at this age; his priority at his age is to own the best and lates games, hang out with the most popular teenage groups of his sex, listen and maybe involve in rap or hip hop songs or rock. So it is less likely that he would maintain a happy long lasting romantic relationship with someone of the opposite sex at this age, and in order to avoid heart break and getting hurt, I would suggest you be just his friend and no further feelings attached. I hope this little piece answered your questions? If you are not satisfied, pls feel free to get back to me. take care and pls do use more of your time to focus on building a promising future for yourself, you can engage in craft development, sing, write poems, short stories, fashion development, etc, than being so engrossed in love, you are still too tender for such...sorry if I sound too harsh, just want you to be the best you can in life, good luck dearie!

    • profile image

      alizay 5 years ago

      I posted a really big comment here, unfortunately why cant i see it here ? :/

    • profile image

      alizay 5 years ago

      hey, my name is aliay and i have read ur outstanding article.... and have came up with the conclusion of asking for ur advice Mr. Author.

      So i dont remember how i got into this... the previous year i had been disappointed by my crush who didnt like me in the start and did in the end, but then left me so i gave in after like half a year he had left. yes i can see its confusing but it straightens up.

      im 14 years and the country i live in , many people consider the one having a boyfriend/girlfriend is "morally corrupt". that is why most of teens here remain single.

      So here is what i cant figure : this year,march (last month) there was an event, i participated in a team of about 11 people (3 girls including me and 8 boys) we all our classmates and there is this one i fell for.

      i didnt like him in the start but later he convinced me to change my mind by his behaivour towards me and his charming personality...

      so to outset with we all gathered up in school to prepare for the event. And day after day he should more interest in me. I know from the start he was surprised that we had so many mutual interests. He started to talk to me more often but in such a way that it was not so obvious for other people to take out anything from such behaivour except me. the second day od the preperation we were sitting and making charts, i didnt like him at that time. He talked to me a lot and always would help me with stuff. Just come in and would do the task for him. then he also offered to bring me a CD (XBOX game ) i was madly in love with , even when i didnt ask him, he just said to me : look i'll just bring it for you, although i was sure that CD only existed in NTSC and not pal ( i wanted pal), he said that he will bring it for me. then he never sat with his back facing me and would always look at me and never look away , he would keep on staring and i would just keep staring in his eyes, also he would not look anywhere else but in my eyes when we talked , no matter what happened and always listened to me even when his friends interepted him. and also he would never blink.

      he really took care of my stuff, like my laptop although he had his own ipad, he would always plug it on charging and carry it for me and return it to me undammaged and in pristine form, he would also offer me to use his wifi and ipad whenever i wanted to. he also sent me a friend request on facebook and talked to me everyday for like 3 hrs. he would always cary stuff for me, whether i asked him or not. he would Carry heavy stuff for me, he would be where i was. he cared so much for me when i cracked my neck , he would always tell me how to do stuff that would make me feel better. 90 percent of times he would start the conversation and the rest i would. he would kinada look jeleous if i talked to any guy. like when i got an award he never congratulated me cuz ( in my opinon i shaked hands with my male friend, that he didnt know of. the day later he posted pic of me getting the award on my wall , and was so friendly to me, he even gave me hgis no. if i wanted help or talk. there was this once he really was upset when a wrong no. was calling me, he tried he best it wouldnt happen ever, he really insulted that guy, and gave me sincere advice that i should never ever pick up the phone if that guy ever called again , he would also tell me about the expensive stuff he bought , and would take my opinion on what he should buy. he would really tell me that i could trust him and that he could keep any secret ( in a good way).

      but there are some stuff that i cant figure out like there was this once that he said he couldnt talk to me cuz he was playing a vid. game and there was this once he told me he was sleepy and that he couldnt talk to me, so i got really upset and i said to he tht if he didnt wanted to talk he could just say it, but then he reasured me by saying : hey ur getting it wrong way i swear i fell asleep". then i said :" its okay i believe you dont worry it doesnt matter" this happened last week, on wednesday and ever since we havent talked, now i dont if he likes me, or what he is thinking , tell me what i should do now ? i really like him he is a gemini and im a libra. what should i do ???? please guid me

      thanx for ur time :)

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      alizay 5 years ago

      hey, my name is aliay and i have read ur outstanding article.... and have came up with the conclusion of asking for ur advice Mr. Author.

      So i dont remember how i got into this... the previous year i had been disappointed by my crush who didnt like me in the start and did in the end, but then left me so i gave in after like half a year he had left. yes i can see its confusing but it straightens up.

      im 14 years and the country i live in , many people consider the one having a boyfriend/girlfriend is "morally corrupt". that is why most of teens here remain single.

      So here is what i cant figure : this year,march (last month) there was an event, i participated in a team of about 11 people (3 girls including me and 8 boys) we all our classmates and there is this one i fell for.

      i didnt like him in the start but later he convinced me to change my mind by his behaivour towards me and his charming personality...

      so to outset with we all gathered up in school to prepare for the event. And day after day he should more interest in me. I know from the start he was surprised that we had so many mutual interests. He started to talk to me more often but in such a way that it was not so obvious for other people to take out anything from such behaivour except me. the second day od the preperation we were sitting and making charts, i didnt like him at that time. He talked to me a lot and always would help me with stuff. Just come in and would do the task for him. then he also offered to bring me a CD (XBOX game ) i was madly in love with , even when i didnt ask him, he just said to me : look i'll just bring it for you, although i was sure that CD only existed in NTSC and not pal ( i wanted pal), he said that he will bring it for me. then he never sat with his back facing me and would always look at me and never look away , he would keep on staring and i would just keep staring in his eyes, also he would not look anywhere else but in my eyes when we talked , no matter what happened and always listened to me even when his friends interepted him. and also he would never blink.

      he really took care of my stuff, like my laptop although he had his own ipad, he would always plug it on charging and carry it for me and return it to me undammaged and in pristine form, he would also offer me to use his wifi and ipad whenever i wanted to. he also sent me a friend request on facebook and talked to me everyday for like 3 hrs. he would always cary stuff for me, whether i asked him or not. he would Carry heavy stuff for me, he would be where i was. he cared so much for me when i cracked my neck , he would always tell me how to do stuff that would make me feel better. 90 percent of times he would start the conversation and the rest i would. he would kinada look jeleous if i talked to any guy. like when i got an award he never congratulated me cuz ( in my opinon i shaked hands with my male friend, that he didnt know of. the day later he posted pic of me getting the award on my wall , and was so friendly to me, he even gave me hgis no. if i wanted help or talk. there was this once he really was upset when a wrong no. was calling me, he tried he best it wouldnt happen ever, he really insulted that guy, and gave me sincere advice that i should never ever pick up the phone if that guy ever called again , he would also tell me about the expensive stuff he bought , and would take my opinion on what he should buy. he would really tell me that i could trust him and that he could keep any secret ( in a good way).

      but there are some stuff that i cant figure out like there was this once that he said he couldnt talk to me cuz he was playing a vid. game and there was this once he told me he was sleepy and that he couldnt talk to me, so i got really upset and i said to he tht if he didnt wanted to talk he could just say it, but then he reasured me by saying : hey ur getting it wrong way i swear i fell asleep". then i said :" its okay i believe you dont worry it doesnt matter" this happened last week, on wednesday and ever since we havent talked, now i dont if he likes me, or what he is thinking , tell me what i should do now ? i really like him he is a gemini and im a libra. what should i do ???? please guid me

      thanx for ur time :)

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 5 years ago from L Island

      @All, I am very sorry for my late response, it's because I lost a beloved brother early this year in a car accident, and ever since his sudden death, I have been so busy combining his business with mine, just to put things in order...please do bear with me.

      @kavas,it is possible that he has realized his mistake and have now come to know your true value...men are always fond of that. So don't ignore him if you are completely single, and while giving him a second chance, you have to exercise wisdom at its height. Good luck and learn to always forgive, it helps a lot.

      @deep-think, thanks a million folds, I glad you stopped by, thank you.

      @neha, you're not in any way wrong if you told your story correctly, and please, don't ignore that new guy, he may be the right guy...check him out carefully, but don't be quick at going intimate. Good luck.

      @awele mordi, thanks dearie, I feel so good reading comments like yours, makes me want to do even more. thank you and good luck in your love endeavors.

      @gissele and sonia, if its real, people will definitely get to find out...anyway, thanks for stopping by.

      @prachi, its hard but very possible, so don't give up. thanks for dropping a word.

      @indianajonesminaj,hmmmmmm.....what a story! hmmm. okay, okay, let's get down at something. firstly, the guy seems to be a kind of player, at least you saw a good evidence; having a take on two different ladies (you and his girlfriend) at the same time, don't ignore that obvious truth, so you don't regret at last.

      he may have adopted a new strategy of pretending he is not after sex just to convince you that he loves you, when maybe he doesn't, so I would suggest you subject him to the test of time- give him more and more time, 6 months, 8 months, etc, and see if he will be able to stand being passionate and loving to you without sex.

      but going out with a guy that keeps mistreating his present girlfriend before your eyes, should be a DANGER SIGNAL that he is a PLAYBOY! You better reconsider your emotional investments in him before it becomes too late. Like I said, if you are too in love or obsessed with him, subject him to test of time and see. Don't just jump into loving him so easily so you don't jump out crying of heart break! Good luck dear, and thanks for stopping by.

      for the article you asked, read this: (http://accofranco.hubpages.com/hub/How-To-Make-A-M... and also try and navigate through my profile and check some other of my articles on relationship, they will really help you in your relationship with men.

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      indianajonesminaj 5 years ago

      hey how you doing hope all is good with you sir.please write an article on how to keep a guy committed and signs to see if is making the effort to be committed. Anyway, i have this ex who's a party type currently. we ended up breaking up because i found out he had another girl who lived near him and which I dont. they went to the same school so maybe they saw each other when they wanted.obviously he does not like her. i think so because the first time we met at a party, that night we didn't know each other actually we knew each other on facebook. In other words it was the first time we have seen each other face to face. Anyway, that night we found a dark spot and kissed the whole night because it felt like love at first sight. when we came back in the crowd. a girl approached him but i didn't pay them any mind because i thought it was just a friend. I start listening to them and to me the guy was actually leaving her. she looked at me and walked away. it was his girlfriend, i was feeling it deep for her because it could have been me even though i'm a cutie and she's not. so i got upset and angry about it and asking him, “why you did that! it could have been me !” and i didn't want to talk to him. he said okay you want me to talk back to her. i said yes! We spent the rest of the night, when I was leaving he was watching mre leaving . everytime I turned to look at him he was looking.s ome few months before his exams we didnt communicate much and i felt like he had another interest. he told me he was busy because he had to be studying for his exams. so i gave him his time. and after his exams. we still didn't communicate much. so later that day i went on his page on facebook and i saw him comment on the same girl photo saying "my beautiful wife" i was hurt that i left him same time and same day. i was crushed. i was hurt! it took me months to forgive him. the next year we started texting again and i told him lets be friends and not enemies. i still liked him alot. so we met on some occasions and we kissed and nothing else. he always look sad and hurt when im leaving. months later we met at a similar party like the first and we were standing with his friend and the same girl approached him and called him one side. he called me by my name and said soon come. i said okay. the girl friends were looking at me and laughing. i didnt give them any attention, then the same girl came up to me and asked if the guy and i are together. i told her the truth by saying no. which was the we was just friends. i walked away to avoid the drama. the guy walked me down leaving the girl. and he apologized. i get it she loved him but he didnt feel the same. she was just jEALOUS. i FORGAVE HIM. and we spent the night by kissing and carressing. when i was leaving he looked weak and sad. he called me and hugged me again. we texted but not alot and i admit he is becoming a better guy.he said he does not like to text he prefer to see me face to face. whenever he's going to bed or when he wakes up or sometimes he'd text me. the last time we met which was feb 26 2012 was at his mom's house where he lives. He insisted we watched 'breaking dawn' so we did. he was already watching and can you believe he started it and we watch it from the onset to the end. he said he wanted to let me know he not thinking about sex. Because I always accusing him that’s they only thing he wants. During the movie, I turned around quickly to see if he was looking at me.to tell u the truth it didn’t seem he was just looking at me it looked like he was admiring me. After the movie, he started asking where would i want to spend my honeymoon and so on. he told me about his life growing up. he will be going to a tertiary school in different area and he wants me to go to a tertiary school there too after i finish school this year june so he can see me regularly. he loves to kiss and cuddle me and touch my face. after we kiss he told me he loves me. when i was leaving he kissed me to the door. and he was hugged me while walking me to the bus stand . Does it seems like he loves me? he never use to text me if i dont text him. now he does but as he said he doesnt like to text so he doesnt text me continually throughout the day. he even sent me credit to text him. does he love me? are he's playing? Oh yeah we never had sex and he never pressure me for it.

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      sonia 5 years ago

      Dear friends, i had a problem with my girl friend 2year ago, which lead to our broke up. when she broke up with me, i was not my self again, i fill so empty inside me. until a friend of my Walt pen told me about a spell caster who helped him in the same problem too. i email the spell caster and i told him my problem and i did what he asked of me, to cut the long story short. before i knew what was happening my girl friend gave me a call and told me that she was coming back to me and was so joyous to have her back to me. we have two kids together and we are happy with our selves. thanks to oracletemplesolution@live.com for saving my relationship and for also saving others own too. continue your good work the great spell caster.

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      Prachi 5 years ago

      I agree with you that you said is very true. to find true love is a very difficult task.

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      giselle 5 years ago

      Nobody wants to be with a needy person. Pleading and being needy is unattractive and is only going to push your ex further away from you. It will only make them think that they made the right decision by breaking up with you. I have been a victim of such circumstance until i was referred to priestandrew91@yahoo.com who did a spell for me and make my ex chasing and begging me to come back. He changed the table around to my favor and i am happy i used his spell to get what i desire the most without having to beg. Giselle

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      Awele mordi 5 years ago

      Wow,i have learnt so much today & I'm happy i need to develop myself.God bless you....

    • profile image

      neha 5 years ago

      hey i need some suggestion ............

      6 years ago i got committed with a guy in my school then i started loving him he introduces myself with his family n always says that i wanna marry u wanna always be with u then after 2 years we got physical after 3-4 months his interest in meeting me n talking to me start decreasing ..... i always forces him to go out with me but he make excuses n says that u dont understand me.... these fights continue for 2 years after that he went out of the station for his studies...... he came to meet me in 2 to 3 months just for 1 day i always forces him to stay for 1 more day but he says my mom will not allow me even he says my mom gets angry when i talk to u on phone at home that's y i cannot talk 2 u when i m at home n u dont understand my family don't wanna compromise..... his family is a bit orthodox n he says if u loves me then u hv 2 do compromise u hv 2 live like my family like my mom i was living with this depression n tension since 2 years i rarely go out with friends ........

      1 month ago a guy in my college became my good friend he says that i love u i told him everything that i m committed still this guy always makes me feel happy go out with me always text me call me n always forces me 2 go out with him n he never leaves me alone ...... i love d way he do sacrifices for me understand me........ when he says i love u i used to tell him that ur love will start decreasing after some years but he says that i wanna marry u n i ll not get physical with u before marriage ......i discussed with him all these problems he says do whatever makes u happy...

      i told my boyfriend that i started liking this guy in my college i love 2 go out with him he cares about me n all that my boyfriend says that stop talking to him be with me i love u so much i asked him that u always says that u hv 2 do compromise with my family even u dont like 2 go out with me dont like to talk 2 me he says that i m unsecured that after marriage u will not not respect my family u ll not be able 2 do compromise........

      please help me give me some suggestions what should i do.... i tell me if i m wrong in my relationship.....

    • deep-think profile image

      deep-think 5 years ago

      It's when I see hubs like yours that I feel I should be doing more with mine. I don't really use hubpages that much but I think I'll get serious with it now.

      I like the tips you have here- I have never seen them before. Love is a complex four letter word and so must be handled with caution. I guess all these facts also apply to ladies too. Thanks for your comment on my blog accofranco and thanks for publishing this useful hub.

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      kavas 5 years ago

      what about a man disappointing your after 10 years in relationship and after a few years he comes back to beg for a re-relationship? Are such men normal???????

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 5 years ago from L Island

      @sdi and Victoria Smith, thanks for the great words, glad you guys stopped by...share the article with your friends. Thank you.

    • profile image

      Victoria Smith 5 years ago

      and ps im not talking about any articles . im talking about you video at the top of tthe spread Thanks Miss V C X X

    • profile image

      Victoria Smith 5 years ago

      i think these women yu talk about who men need to STAY AWAY from , these women who as you put it have been used and abused over and over again DO NOT deserve to be stayed away from ifff anything a real man would work HARDER to attract this kind of woman and show her that there are actualy great men out there who treat women wonderfully and restore her faith . simply brushing her off because she is has an emotional blockage with men because she is a VICTIM has got ot be the worste thing i have EVER heard to be brutaly honest . thankyou Miss Victoria Christine x x

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      sdi 5 years ago

      When you love some one truly you should be honest with her always and make her life partenr for always.

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 5 years ago from L Island

      @Mark, thanks for voicing out on this. Honestly, we men do take women for granted at certain points in life, and we must refrain from such actions...please stand up against women abuse in relationship, share this article on your facebook wall status to enlighten more young women globally. Thank you.

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      Mark 5 years ago

      To me this video shows the selfishess of man towards women. They are treating women just to get satisfaction, by the way if u truly loves the woman, you need to show your true love and love avoid them.

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 5 years ago from L Island

      @seekingtruelove, the first thing that matters in any romantic relationship between a man and a woman, is physical attraction. If a man is not physically attracted to his wife or girlfriend, then the relationship is faulty and won't probably work. A man you should date, must be physically attracted to you to start with, and if this is lacking, i am afraid what he's up to.

      Remember, it may be possible that this very man isn't truly in love with you, and maybe he is trying, forcing himself to like you out of pity or emotional sympathy, which is very very dangerous for both of you.

      A must you ought to date should be a man that's physically, emotionally and mentally attracted to you to start with. but physical attraction must be the first drive that should compel him towards initiating a move to have you as his. If this is missing, it is a casual friendship and never a date or love affair. Think properly, think wise and be very careful so you don't end up in a deadlock marriage in future. Finally, have you made out time to discover for yourself if he is a eunuch? 'eunuch' meaning men who don't have sexual feelings for women. there are artificial, spiritual or natural eunuchs. Good luck and i hope this answered your question?

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 5 years ago from L Island

      @seekingtruelove, the first thing that matters in any romantic relationship between a man and a woman, is physical attraction. If a man is not physically attracted to his wife or girlfriend, then the relationship is faulty and won't probably work. A man you should date, must be physically attracted to you to start with, and if this is lacking, i am afraid what he's up to.

      Remember, it may be possible that this very man isn't truly in love with you, and maybe he is trying, forcing himself to like you out of pity or emotional sympathy, which is very very dangerous for both of you.

      A must you ought to date should be a man that's physically, emotionally and mentally attracted to you to start with. but physical attraction must be the first drive that should compel him towards initiating a move to have you as his. If this is missing, it is a casual friendship and never a date or love affair. Think properly, think wise and be very careful so you don't end up in a deadlock marriage in future. Finally, have you made out time to discover for yourself if he is a eunuch? 'eunuch' meaning men who don't have sexual feelings for women. there are artificial, spiritual or natural eunuchs. Good luck and i hope this answered your question?

    • profile image

      Seekingtruelove1 5 years ago

      Been exclusively dating a man who is attentive, caring, helpful,great in every way except isn't physically affectionate. He doesnt reject my physical affection shown toward him but he doesn't initiate towards me. I have asked him but he doesn't k ow why. What could this be? I'm confused.

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 5 years ago from L Island

      @All, i am so so sorry for late replies, i lost a bosom brother this january, and it is really weighing me down as he is yet to be buried.

      @ddd....hmmmm, anyway, thanks for stopping by.

      @fatimo hussein, if a guy truly loves you, and you guys for one reason or the other loses contact, he will always want a way to get back to you, and when he finally finds a way, he doesn't hesitate or wait, so be careful...he may not be so much interested in the relationship again as you are, so don't be the one to push things further, just give him the room and wait for him to do the work. it is also possible that he is feeling somewhat inferior or whatever, and so, he ended up making use of his friends to get back to you, you must find out if this is the case, if it is, then help him out to finish the work. thanks for stopping by and good luck in your relationship.

      @Nelly, men naturally are polygamous in nature, i keep telling ladies this, and sometimes, it doesn't depict that they do not love their main girlfriend, sometimes too, it's just a weakness most men can't overgrow, don't conclude yet. again, his age matters too, because guys of his age are still out to have fun in most scenarios, you can give him more time for now, since you have a bond with him already, there's no need walking away for now.

      what am i trying to say in essence? it is possible for a guy to love a particular girl and still cheat. it is also possible for him to love a girl and not cheat, it all depends on his personality, up-bringing, orientation, belief, social and financial status and of course his circle of friends- who are they? what are their lifestyle? but please and please, do not interfere in his relation with his male friends, it may be disastrous, but you can suggest to him using scenarios and examples of some good guys he knows (though not all guys fancy this, but some do take it as a challenge and change).

      for now, focus on building a stronger relationship with him by re-inventing that initial friendship you guys shared during wooing periods, and make sure you pray...pray...pray for him, it really works, forget what some atheist may tell you, prayer changes things in this life.

      contrary to all i have said, that guy is playing pranks with you my dear...what you just told me in the last paragraph of your comment, confirmed that he is not ready to settle down and you went ahead and thought you could tie him down through pregnancy entrapment, it doesn't work for all men. please don't ever do such again if you do finally survive this. but since you have his mum's backing, you are on a safer side though, keep talking to him but don't persuade or threaten him, instead, make him to understand how much you care and love him. make him to understand that you are for real and not for his material wealth or whatever he has.

      that's all i have to say for now, if you have more questions, please do come back and ask.

    • profile image

      Nelly 5 years ago

      He tells me he loves me but isn't ready now for marriage.because he takes care of his business and that his father might think he is going to spend his(fathers)money on me,so i should wait for a while until his is enough settled.

    • profile image

      Nelly 5 years ago

      hi

      i have lived wit a guy for 6yrs,known n loved by all his family members,1st year was nice n beautiful,second year,he cheated on me with four different girl.And frm the second year to now its still the same old story.i have tried so much to break up him wit but he keeps telling me he loves me n that he would change,but still the same.His mum doesn't want as to break up and keeps ad vicing that all would be well.we have brought a land together,i told him am pregnant and his mum is happy but for him,he pretends to like it and most times tells me i have shorten his happiness.he is so much into fun with his friends rather than spending time with me. Am 24yrs and he is 27yrs.my problem is if he truly loves me as says,why than does he cheat on me and keep doing the things that hurts me. i love him very much but sometimes i fell like walking away even though his mum wouldn't like it. please help me because am helpless.

    • profile image

      fatima hussain 5 years ago

      ***one should not make i mean...

    • profile image

      fatima hussain 5 years ago

      Happy New year sir...here is my story.....i broke up with my boyfreind in june...n since then v r not in contact...as he wanted to...!! HIs words were "Freindship can change into love but love cannot be changed into friendship...!" Though his freinds tried to contact me last month just to know my wherebouts....and even he tried to mail me...using a fake id of a girl....But i just showed myself as a girl to whom now it does not matters much and this guy does not even exist for her in her life..!! But the fact is i really love him , and yeah i forgot to tell u that during the course of break up i made all d mistakes which one should ...can u please suggest me some ways as to how build up a contact..?? i mean should i initialise or wait for him to make a move...??? and does these contacts made by his friends depict something..?? Please help me..!! I want him back...! please...!! mail me at nabilasultan19@gmail.com

    • profile image

      ddd 6 years ago

      Thank you vadoo spell! The love spell worked and he returned to me. You are a marvellous, wonderful, stupendous, shocking and extraordinary person with so much talent. You have a gift like no other I have seen. You are an amazing person with a beautiful soul and inner balance that shines on all you meet. You surpass any and all other gifted individuals I have ever met. Your information is so accurate it is incredibly unbelievable. Your wonder-working magical know how of the universe and its laws are magnified within a structure so unique it’s impossible to find anywhere. Again, thank you for everything! vadoospell@gmail.com is the only answer to your problems

    • accofranco profile image
      Author

      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @jasmine, sure...you can give him more chance, but then you must put more arm to ensure you resist his moves else, it may end up disastrous...good luck!

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      jasmine 6 years ago

      thank u so much for reply i m really in need for this.. accofranco i havent slept with that guy ever. i met him and make love in limits he insisted to do sex many times but i always use to deny it. he used to fought over this matter by saying that u dont love thats why you are not coming near mei m ready to marry you then why you always say no to me. he fought with me by saying abusive language whenever he had suspicion on me that i have a relation with other guy also. 1 week ago i decided to get out of this relation because on that day he again fought with me by saying abusive language over phone. after that he apologise with me and promised not to use this kind of language again and trust me. affranco should i give him a chance or not.. he use to cry and beg for this relation. what should i do..please reply

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @Jasmine, you have already done some mistakes, which include sleeping with him even without any marital commitment besides mere promises. Meanwhile, experience has proved that any relationship that starts with physical abuse, will always end in a physical abuse that most times leads to: death of either partners, deformity, breakup, etc etc...so my own advice would be that you desist from every abusive relationship, no matter the temptation to stay.

      I am sorry to tell you that no reasonable and sensible man would raise his hand against a woman he claims he loves. Be cautious and make use of your own intuition, there are more than a million men ready to treat you right, and even wed you like a queen you are! Good luck!

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      jasmine 6 years ago

      hello sir,

      i met a guy 4 months ago. he proposed me for marriage i agreed but i need sometime for this relationship so i said we will marry 3 months later, but he constantly put pressure on me for marriage. he said he loves me so much that he can do anything for me. i met his parents also they are also ready for marriage but there are something which make me suspicious about him is that he sometimes hurts me by saying some abusive language just to make me cry, and then see how i react if i beg for the relationship then he is ok with that and everything is over if i dont beg then he use more abusive language and mentally harassed me. next day usually he say sorry always and say he will never repeat it again. it happens twice. second thing which make me suspicious is he always force me to do unprotected sex, third thing is he always want me to meet him in his house whenever i ask for going out he says that he dont like to roam or going out. inspite of all these things he is very caring, shares everything with me whether related to his past or present. please advise me something i am very confused about this relationship.

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @Crazy love, please forgive my late reply, actually i am working tirelessly to wrap up a novel i am putting together, and its really knocking me down with researches and blah, blah, blah...please accept my apology for late response.

      Meanwhile, from the little story you told, the guy is cheating his beloved gf...thats a large truth, and i am also made to understand from your story that you feel lust for him and that is the same he feel for you, LUST, and not LOVE! If you told your story correctly, thats my counsel. He is using you to while away time as part of his masculine adventuring in life, RUN! Make sure you read my other article titled:Why Do Men Cheat In A Relationship? Dont fail to read it all. And for your fast note, some men do cheat on their lover or wife even when they love them. Why? Read the article and find out why. Meanwhile, i wish you the best and please do not cry and feel bad, because you ought to be happy that you did not finally end up loving a guy that cheats someone who loves him and he also loves. Remember, BETTER is not good enough because your BEST is yet to come! Good luck dearie. Love!

      @Uchechi, i would suggest you write me personally through my contact me page. you can find it around where you saw my profile picture, somewhere below....just click on contact this writer or whatsoever and indicate that you are UCHECHI from my hub. Till then, please stay calm...all is well.

      To Uchechi, Crazy love and other readers that didnt felt obliged to drop a comment, thank you for visiting and please do pass the article on to your friends and loved ones and lets make this world a sweeter world for all of us to live happily. you can as well, like the page so that your friends and followers can equally benefit from this esteem free knowledge and you might be saving a dying soul by doing just that. Thank you.

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      Uchechi 6 years ago

      I like ur reasoning and caring for women,i've a noble fear,i dont want to enter into any relationship cos of my ex attitude,i dont feel i can love or trust anyone,i even fear marriage.I need to get over this,pls

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      crazy love 6 years ago

      i really thought maybe you can tell me if this is love. in fact, i'm attached and currently in a long distance relationship. recently i got to know this guy and he actually kisses me and all despite knowing that i have a boyfriend. i know i should not allow it to happen but i kind of have good feelings for him. but the thing is, he says he still think of his ex-girlfriend and have recently patched things up with her(they are also on a long distance relationship). what is this? i am so confused with what is happening. if the guy i know really love his gf, why would he want to do that with me? he obviously doesnt like or love me am i right? what should i do...

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @Paris, thanks so much...you just lifted my heart Paris....i am so so excited that this article is really helping a lot of ladies...it makes me feel fulfilled....thank you...i appreciate your comment in no small measure...and please do pass it along to your friends and colleagues and family...cos i want ladies to be happy in their relationships...goodluck and thank you once again.

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      paris 6 years ago

      i loved it.it was very useful for me.and also love the way you write and express it.your style of writing is very friendly and fun.thanks a billion

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @Maureen; actually, i didn't get your question or what you exactly want to know cos, you didn't explain anything to give me an insight into what challenge you are facing with your relationship...so try and get back in touch with a clear elaboration to make me understand you better and know where to come in...meanwhile, thanks for stopping by and stay cool..as i look forward to hearing from you. Cheers!

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      Maureen 6 years ago

      It's quite complex if it's a long distance relationship though. I've been trying a lot of things to make him open up to me but it's getting harder everyday because I am also longing for that feeling of being loved. I really wish I could know his true feelings for me before we finally we get to meet up.

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @Lucie, welcome thanks dearie...but i perceive some insecurity guised in the clothing of 'fear of being lonely without him'...but hanging on in an abusive relationship that is not working is as dangerous as inhaling poison and hoping it won't hurt someday with time...the earlier you get out, the easier you can gain back your happiness and possibly connect with the right man that will treat you right...LOVE or ROMANCE shouldn't be a do or die matter! Thanks though...

      @Jeanette, I didn't get you too well...pls if you wouldn't mind, come clear the fog...thanks though for stopping by.

      @Pricilla, Nothing much has happened to ascertain love...maybe because you only told your story in a glimpse....wished to get a more clearer view...but you said he is a w/pilot....what do you mean exactly by "w/pilot"? thanks as i look forward to hearing from you...cheers!

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      pricilla 6 years ago

      pls.send me advice about me im dating w/pilot man we usually meet and eat outside he usually kiss me hold my hands and kiss me n my hair even my hands,lips and my head...he always looking at me means eye to eye contact after he say something he kiss me n lips..what do u think he realy loves me? he realy serious to me? pls give me advice pls...

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      lucie 6 years ago

      thank you...but he somehow convinces me everytime by telling some reason or the other.i'm really not able to make things out properly.i dont know why i believe him so much.sometimes i get really irritated towards myself for trying not to break the relation in some hope that he would change himself.anyway...once again, thanks for the suggestion...!!!

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      Jeanette 6 years ago

      Cast.. A... SPELL?! O.o wtf..

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      lucie 6 years ago

      hmmm...i'm really down now...but i think u are right.i'll surely clear it out with him.thank u...

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @lucie, it wouldn't be too harsh if i tell you plainly that that guy doesn't have you at heart from the things you said about how he behave or act towards you...therefore, in a more simplified manner, he doesn't love you as you presume...sit him down and ask him open-ended and close-ended questions why he's acting the way he does.

      Meanwhile, thanks for stopping by....good luck!

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @lucie, it wouldn't be too harsh if i tell you plainly that that guy doesn't have you at heart from the things you said about how he behave or act towards you...therefore, in a more simplified manner, he doesn't love you as you presume...sit him down and ask him open-ended and close-ended questions why he's acting the way he does.

      Meanwhile, thanks for stopping by....good luck!

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      lucie 6 years ago

      hey this is very useful to girls like me,who have been into a relation for so long a time but still dont know if they are with the right person or not.and even i'm confused if my man really loves me...(but no clear signs indicating that he dont)coz,i cant watch him close as we stay so far to each other because of his work.and coming to my doubts on this,he dont spend a lot of time talking to me.in fact,he can just stay for weeks together not talking to me.if asked for reason,he simply says that he was busy.(but can someone be so busy that they had to pass such a long time without talking to the people close to them?)secondly,he always tries to hide things from me.(like,he says that he cant talk to me coz he's with some work n doesn't tell me what he was doing unlesss i really force him to tell or i think that may be a lie!!)i dont know how i should consider all these things.i've many complaints wid him.(like,he never wished me on my b'day since our relation has started three yrs back.he just says that he forgot,he never atleast tries to know if i had any problem when i sound dull while talking to him n many things like this.all these things seems to be silly but these things means a lot to a girl who really loves someone right?)i love him truly...does he?

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @Melinda...before i can approve that, give me the real address of the person in Africa: the country, state, city and street, with phone numbers.

      TO ALL MY FANS AND FOLLOWERS, BE WISE, DON'T GO FOLLOWING ANY LINK...UNTIL IT HAS BEEN CONFIRMED AND VERIFIED. THANK YOU. STAY SAFE, DON'T TRY!

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      melinda 6 years ago

      hey people, search for spell caster is much online but do they really cast genuine spell that take effect as fast we want them to, but i met a cast a spell with this email address thegreatwizardpriest@ymail.com , i saw effects if you want his service contact him immediately and see a change in your life. I traveled to Africa to meet this spell caster because i didn't want to be scammed like i was done before given false hope about the return of my girl.He is so genuine and real.

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @RMC: Firstly, you are in love with Luke, you must admit the fact and face it and then stop acting cowardly towards your own emotion else, stop abruptly if you aren't prepared to venture. Secondly, Luke was an inch away from falling in love with you, but you probably ruined his emotional build up through your fluctuating actions; almost all men dislike a nagging lady, and displaying it when you guys are still eyeing each other tells him there is great danger ahead, should you guys startup something more intimate, which scares him.

      Turning down his invitation for a personal party when actually he honors yours, may be telling him that you don't take him to heart, and maybe that you feel too big to be in his party, maybe for whatever social class you may belong to...which only you can tell; minds are private bags.

      Luke seem to be liking you, which is geering towards love, but make sure his feelings are not super-imposed due to what he thinks you are socially, politically, financially, etc, so figure out his own social class; does it measure up to yours?...It's normal for majority of men to form a real faked emotion for a lady of higher social class, just to get something they alone know they want from her. You can run a test on him...

      Meanwhile, you can start all over again, haven certified that his emotions are not based on material observations or attractions.

      I don't just know how to divulge most secrets that would assist you in knowing truly what this Luke guy is up to...anyway, if you care, i wouldn't mind sending you an excerpt copy of my unpublished book, to help you, cos i believe that alone can open your eyes more. if you care to have it for free, just contact me and let me know how you wish to receive it. Take care for now. You need clearer explanations (that is beyond what i can tell just here) to guard and to guide you in your romantic endeavors...meanwhile, i can't put my book contents here...you should know why....Thank you.

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      RMC 6 years ago

      He started making his point across by putting his words into caps locks and tell me how annoying I was with my texting. How distracting I was and how he was really losing his patience with me. He asked me if I wanted to burn the bridge with him. I was crying reading the things he was writing me. Finally, I said to him, "there you go insulting people again. I'm done talking now. Bye". And then he went off on how I take everything so personally and that I needed to get business manners and that he was on the brink of canceling the show. When he said "is that what you want" I just replied, "no sorry. I didn't mean to invade your space. I thought we were friends. I will learn manners and I won't text you again". Well, I think he felt bad because right after he said, "I don't mind you calling me up, even if it's 6 times a day for some weird reason". He wrote me to tell me we were friends and that he just hadn't experienced anything like that before and even made a light joke about it. I told him I could appreciate that but that I felt he crossed the line with all the things he said to me. I told Luke that I would only contact him when necessary and only through email. We haven't been the same since then...

      I did get a chance to go to his place with my minion for a late night meeting and the shows did really well! His partners were all really happy in the end. Matt (his roommate) even came up to me a few times and told me how Luke always talks about me. How he's always saying such good things about me. I made sure to be nicer to his partners but Luke and I still don't text. I've tried sending him a text here and there with no reply. He usually just calls me right after I send him a text now. I've never let him hear me cry or anything like that! I did admit to him one night (very loosely) that I thought his type of guy was attractive and he said he was flattered. But, we always fight about the littlest things.

      I've started talking back to him and yelling back at him. Sometimes, it seems like I enjoy fighting with him but I really don't. The week before my show ended he got drunk and cornered me at his club. Luke put his arms around my waist and I felt a passion in his touch. He kept his hands on my waist and asked me why I'm always so mad at him. I just smiled at him and told him because he makes me mad. Then he grabbed my hand and started play fighting with me. I play smacked his stomach a couple of times and we hugged. Now that the show is over and I had to call him one last time to fight with him. It resulted in my canceling another show that I had proposed to him. He told me I was making a big deal out of nothing. We yelled at each other then finally I calmed down and told him I had to go and that I would see him later, he said ok and we wished each other a good day. I felt really bad because he is going back to his hometown for the fall (I have known this for a while now and he keeps reassuring me that he's coming back once a month and reminding me that we will still see each other and be in touch, especially when I go to law school. ). He even invited my personal face book profile to his going away party. During the last night of my show at his club, Luke asked me if I was going to his party. I told him maybe I would go and he said, "what the f*** is that? I went to all your events". I told him I've been really busy and I wasn't sure and he said ok. Before he went back inside he said, come to my going away party. I didn't end up going...

      I ended up texting him afterwards & he called me. He sounded really standoffish at first. This was the first time I had called him to make small talk. At first he was really abrupt, using one worded answers. Then when I asked him what was wrong his voice completely changed. He said he was just working and asked what was up. I told him I was calling him to see if he wanted to join me for a drink. He thanked me and said he was swamped with work and had to deal with somebody there. I just told him it was okay & that I didn't want to leave things the way we did. That I respected him and that I really wanted to be on better terms with him. He said he really appreciated that call and thanked me and said he would let me know if he was able to come see me. We left it at that. He didn’t end up contacting me before he left and its been a few weeks since. I didn’t hear from him, so one day I added him as a friend on face book and just wrote on the message line “sorry”. He didn't except it but that night, he texted me and said “I appreciate u reaching out, let’s give everything time to cool off. Thx. Take care”. I didn’t reply to him for a few days and when I did I thanked him for the update and not much else. He did write me the other day when I touched base on getting some images from him, and he told me he’s been really busy. He’s been to LA and Vegas and is coming to my city in a few weeks from now. I really like him still and I think about him everyday.

      So, my question is could there be something there with him even though he's acting distant right now? And why do we fight the way we do? Is there any sense in continuing to like this guy? And if there is, how should I play this? Thank you and sorry for the novel!

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @RMG, you didn't finished your explanation...please find time and finish it up so i can get you better and probably know what help you need. Meanwhile, relax, nothing has yet spoiled...calm down and let me hear the full gist or you can still contact me personally if you don't want your ID and explanations disclosed. Thanks for stopping by...be strong, you have someone by your side, your not alone! Good luck as i look forward to hearing from you soonest.

      @Conduzed, i don't know just how to explain all the details here...how i wished you have a copy of my book (for ladies), i bet you will be amazed at the secrets you will discover...your mouth will be left agape till the end of the book. unfortunately, this book is yet to be published in a paper back so that it can be available for most of my fans who are eager to read it...hmmmm...it hurts me though cos, i wrote it not for money but to assist ladies overcome men and their cunning attitudes towards them...i am hoping desperately to see it come into print so i can send copies to you guys.

      Anyway, you allowed your feminine instincts to control your inner conscience of witness, which is the highest form of defense...Dear confuzed, since i can't go on detailing the reasons just here...please i am very sorry about that, i don't mind sending you a personal copy of some excerpts of the book if you wish...and then, how secured is your life at the moment now? that is the greatest concern for now!

      I wish you the best dearie...

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      Confuzed, 12 months ago 6 years ago

      Hello Acco,

      I just wanted to let you know that you were right of the man I wrote you about 12 months ago. I did have to be careful. It turns out he had a terrible secret.

      He hired the man who crashed into my friend in the car accident that nearly costed me my life. He was trying to kill me to take over my business. He admitted this to me one day when I sat him down and asked him why he came back for me (like you suggested). After I left my office in his father's building, he tried to get me kidnapped and failed. I switched shifts with my co-worker and she got kidnapped instead. To this day, I have no clue where this man is and I fear his plan in the back of my mind

      I would like to know how could I have fallen for a man who wanted to harm me and cost me my life?

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      RMC 6 years ago

      Dear Acco Franco,

      I am giving this a shot because the reality is I have no clue what else is left here. I am considered a socialite in the city where I live in, I'm constantly in newspapers and I come from a family whose actions are always in the press. It is no secret who I am and I just want to mention that to describe how I got here because it has a lot to do with the guy I met & like.

      I am socially active and I host seasonal charity events where I live. Well, during one of my events; I ended up meeting a nightclub owner who had previously solicited my company for assistance with one of his events. I had declined his request as it was too short notice. A few weeks later, I ended up calling up the nightclub to solicit hosting one of my events there.

      At the time, I had another charity event I was working on. The person at the nightclub referred me to this guy, we can pretend his name is Luke. I called Luke and I reminded him who I was and then told him I was contacting him to host my event. Well, he was very interested said yes and we exchanged contact info. (I had never met this individual before) and I did not expect him to be heading to town on the day of another one of my show's. I met him that day because he came to see me and get a peak at the show. Luke had no particular effect on me then. Shortly after, we started to have meetings together. My event at his club was a month and a half long. The month prior to it entailed Luke and I meeting a few times and talking or texting for the most part. He would always suggest things about our event that would require me to meet with him at his club and that he would have to show me how to use. Inevitably, I started to like him. I am trying to recall in my mind when exactly I started liking Luke but I have no recollection, it just happened.

      So, I started texting him little by little until soon enough we were having full on conversations via text. I seriously never knew he wasn't a texter until one day he wrote me: "FYI, I am not a texter lol..." so, after that when we would see each other I would laugh at him and poke fun at him for pretending not to be a texter when "he knew he liked it". He would just sit there with a grin on his face and say "oh sure". It was fun. I started to bring my entourage into his club. When I was there, Luke would always be really nice to me and he would constantly walk by my table and greet my guests. He was a really good host. Sometimes, he would walk up to me and start bugging me and fake pushing me around. A week prior to the show, I was supposed to take a trip to Amsterdam (for Fashion week) and ended up having to cancel it last minute because the event at Luke's club was not going well. I remember when I told him I had an airline credit he suggest I go to Belize with him in November. When I said, why Belize? He said "it's beautiful there. There's sexy Spanish women (I am a Spanish woman), good food, and I hate this place". Then, I said well, I'm not a lesbian but it sounds great! We've never really brought this trip up again. I must mention here that he has told me he is obsessed with Pakistani women so I don't know what to make of that.

      But as the week progressed, Luke had warned me that he wouldn't be at my event for the first 2 weeks because he had business to take care of elsewhere. So, I worked that entire week and ensured we had a great turn out for our first night. I remember telling him how worried I was that he wouldn't be there because nobody in his club would knew what we agreed to. Luke reassured me that everything would be okay and that he would leave his staff with instructions. Whenever Luke reassures me, I always tell him that I trust him and let the issue go then and there. There were no complaints that first weekend but it was hard to work with his partners. Whenever I needed something, they would say call Luke. I would (even though he was out of town) and he was so attentive, he'd answer on the first ring or text me right back. Luke and I always laugh at the fact that we have "minions" to do our bidding for us. One night I had another big show at a competitor club and I told him via text, "I want you" paused for half a sec and then wrote "to be there" and he said okay I will be there for sure. By this time I had fallen for him.

      I had the guts enough to ask him for a dinner date and at first he tried to be all like "oh I'm saving up to buy a house and I'm on a strict diet. Saturday is my only cheat day". And I just wrote him, "well, this Saturday then; I am taking you to blank, and buying you the least fattening thing on the menu". He just "oh my, okay if you insist". A few days later, I had to cancel and ask him if we could reschedule our lunch because that day I had to prep for my show! He laughed at me and said okay. We've never really brought this up again. Well, he did come to that show. He brought his minion with him and bought me drinks. This was the first time we hugged too. We actually began getting to know each other. I know about his family, he knows about mine. I realized how alike we are in talking with him when he gives me a lift to his club or when we chat via text. I know he wants to move to the same city I was hoping to attend law school in. He's offered to help me with my business when he's there.Luke also knows about my decision to be celibate and save myself for the right man. He tells me he is glad to hear that because he doesn't like easy women. He says it must be hard for me to find a good man in this city and I agreed with him. Luke says he wants to have a family, get married, and settle down by the age of 30. He's only 28 now.

      Everything was fine between us until his partners started complaining about things in the show. When he came back from his trip on the second week, I had texted him late one night and he asked me when we could talk. I told him I would call him and he said ok. He was with his partner (and his roommate) and he began to tell me about the nature of the complaints. I got mad and said well since were talking in the open here, and I told him what my complaints were. He got a little upset and told me to take responsibility. The things he said made me a little upset and I cried (I hoped it wasn't obvious to him). I let Luke go and sobbed for a while to myself.

      The next week, I made sure I looked great and that the event went well. I was walking to my area when he stopped me and tried talking to me. I tried to walk past him pretending I didn't notice him (I was still hurt from what he said to me) and he grabbed my arm. I told him I was not happy and that I had to go. He sounded worried and asked what is it? Let's go and talk to Matt (his partner and roommate). I just cut him off by saying "Luke, I'm not happy and I'm going home". He said okay and I left. My assistant (aka minion), stayed that night and he called to tell me the next day that Luke had pulled him aside to talk to him. Apparently, he was really upset with how I had treated him the night before. My minion tried to smooth things over and the next day I called Luke. He immediately asked, "so what was wrong last night?" and I explained it to him. He seemed to side with me and told me not to worry about it and reassured me that he would take care of me.

      I started using that statement against him, I'd joke and say "that's the least I could do for the man that takes care of me". So, on another weekend his partners complained again. It seems like he would take out the frustrations of his partners out on me because he would be so up front with the issues and when I would try to explain he'd write me off. Then when I'd be upset about that he would yell at me and I took it with a grain of salt the first few times. Our friendship finally took a toll for the worst when we were text fighting one day. I had told him how the other nightclub treats me and how the things I wanted weren't something I invented in my head. Then he blew up at me. He started making his point across by putting his words into caps locks and tell me how annoying I was with my texting. How distracting I was and how he was really losing his patience with me. He asked me if

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @ann, i doubt if this love is real...be careful, he might be using to while away time during his business trips, and don't be shocked when you find out that it may not be only you that he is into...anyway, i am not trying to conclude hastily...but i believe that you were too fast and pushy, and that was why you allowed your feelings to be carried away to the extent of indulging in a sex on the first date, and still repeated it because you felt that with sex, you can tie him down and make him committed to you, but that was a wrong approach. men hardly get tied down with just sex! please start now to make amendments and put him on surveillance, you can as well read my other article on: how to catch a cheating boyfriend. find it on my account and other hubs.

      for now, good luck, and thanks for asking a vital question that would help many other readers and followers to learn a great lesson too.

      @chaitra, i have answered your question on the mail..please find time and go through it. bye and good luck dear.

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      Chaitra 6 years ago

      Hello Sir.. How are you?

      And I actually needed ur advice Sir..:) Now actually wat happened is recently i only messaged him for some reason and we had some discussion and he said that he will be coming to India very soon and he said like lets talk face to face and decide what step to take regarding our relationship.. till then lets not conclude.. even i felt that is the right thing so I agreed for that..What is ur opinion sir regarding this? and wat all the Do's and Dont's to be done when i meet him sir??

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      ann 6 years ago

      good day sir! i just wanna know if my bf is really inlove with me. i have a foreigner boyfriend right now. i only met him online. he is sweet but he has very spare time communicating with me because of his work. he came last week here in our country for a business trip. We met then and he also want me to bring him to my parents to meet them personally. and so we did. the next day, we met in a hotel and we did sex of course. he was out in the province for almost a week because of his trip. he seldom text me. i think i only receive one message a day. the time that he returned here in the city, we met again and as usual we went to the hotel. he is still sweet, holding my hands everywhere but he never steal a glance on me.i asked him if he has other gfs then he said none and that he loves me too. do you think he is serious with me? I am really confused sir. i really want the truth.

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @Cidem, you first tackled my first advice: age..lol, you must be funny. anyway, dear i must tell you the truth, your love at the time still have a long way to go as to prove its ability to sustain with maturity- i mean as you guys grow, things might unfold differently, and it maybe that you guys are only passing through a teenage fantasies of admiration and maybe, lust. ensure you guys stay off sexual matters and remain best of friends, and family ties like you pointed out. then wait, keep the friendship and wait for the right time, to avoid later life regrets. please i didn't meant to hurt you, but that is the best of my advice for now dearie. remain best friend to him, not relationship or romance affair. thanks for reading and stopping by to ask your question, which i believe would help solve other readers' dilemma. keep checking back and take good care.

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @Cidem, you first tackled my first advice: age..lol, you must be funny. anyway, dear i must tell you the truth, your love at the time still have a long way to go as to prove its ability to sustain with maturity- i mean as you guys grow, things might unfold differently, and it maybe that you guys are only passing through a teenage fantasies of admiration and maybe, lust. ensure you guys stay off sexual matters and remain best of friends, and family ties like you pointed out. then wait, keep the friendship and wait for the right time, to avoid later life regrets. please i didn't meant to hurt you, but that is the best of my advice for now dearie. remain best friend to him, not relationship or romance affair. thanks for reading and stopping by to ask your question, which i believe would help solve other readers' dilemma. keep checking back and take good care.

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      Cidem Aksoy 6 years ago

      Heyy. im only 15 but dont tell me im to young for a real relation ship ! this guy is my ex boyfriends mate, but they dont talk to each other much...We started to hang out with the person i love but i never had in mind that i was going to fall inlove with him..and so we new each other and then our parents met each other.. his mum and my mum became really close friends and so we saw each other nearly everyday :) we said that in future we might get married like in few years 1 or 2... he tells me that he loves me i tell him i love him aswell and so we go movies..we hook up this that but theres one thing im worried about..does he really love me??? he loves getting me pissed -.- he acts cocky sometimes but then he tells me he loves me...and we are pretty close, its like where engaged already.. so my question is, is it normal when my boyfriend acts cocky to me???

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @chaitra, what you did cannot be totally condemned, if he was truly real, he should have stood your test...anyway, you guys can still be close friends, and watch what it would lead to...meanwhile, it may not be necessary to quit the relationship entirely if and only if you are not mentally balanced to do that.....i am very sorry for my late reply...its because of loads of work...bear with me dearie.

      @queen of the universe, i understand what you have went through in the past, but you cannot move forward if you don't let your past go.

      we all have pasts, we all have things that tend to hound us, especially our pasts experiences like yours, but would you rather allow your past to mar your chances of connecting with the right person or let it go and move forward???

      you guys need to read my book for a more comprehensive explanations about love and lust and how to manage disappointments and failures in relationships.

      Thanks for reading and commenting, i value all your comments, questions and contributions in all measure, and please do bear with me for my late reply....i hope this answers your question?

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      Queen of the Universe 6 years ago

      I am a giving loving person with a big heart but i would always meet mean that wanted something from me,now i know a relationship is give and take, not take, take, and take but that was the way it was with the men I was used too, I was married for 13 years to a man that couldn't keep a job if his life depended on it, and in would always make excuses that there wasn't any jobs out there, but the truth is that he didn't want to work, I would be up at night paying bills on line and his ass would be sleep, I would be out either at work or if i didn't work that take taking care of some other business because I stay busy, and he would be at home on the internet, from the moment he wakes up until he would go to sleep at night, and believe it or not I loved him so much, his family and friends tried to warn me about him, but he would say they had something against him that's why they say that but he doesn't know what it is,as time passed I grew and my feeling changed, he started looking pathetic to me, the sight of him made me frown, he would tell me I will find a job but after 13 years with him I knew his ass was lying, I would just say umhm.I prayed to god if this man is not for me then please give me the strength to walk away, and God did, a year ago I was going through it and I met this man we talked for months as friends, but he wanted to be in a relationship with me,and he was everything I wanted in a man,but you know that saying if it seems to good to be true then it probably is,well anyway this man I have known now for 1 year and 7 months to be exact. he tries so hard to convince me that he is different he comes from a traditional family his family is great they treat me like part of the family I have met all his friends,he wants to marry me but the thought of getting married scares the hell out of me, he bought me a ring,he is working long ours to pay for the wedding, I have tried so much in the pass to push him away but he never gives up, I love him truly with all my heart, but I keep thinking back,and the hell I went through, I just can't go through that kind of pain again,I don't know how to forget the past, so I can have a loving healthy life with my new man, because I know that if I keep looking back at the past, when i turn around he will be gonna because everyone has their limits, someone help if you can.

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      chaitra 6 years ago

      Hello Sir,

      Even I would be Very Happy to meet u in person If I get a chance But I am helpless.Coming to My relationship matter, Today I ended the relationship Sir. I don't know how u will feel after hearing this. I am having a doubting nature from my Childhood. I don't trust anyone so easily but after few days I will trust but i will be feeling Insecure always. The same thing happened with my love. I had a doubt that he might be cheating on me so I created a Fake profile and started chatting with him. He used to flirt a bit and told that he don't have any lover. This was really shocking to me. I was very furious and in that mindstate I scolded him off telling that don't cheat the girls and God will be seeing You and u will be paid for it. But He told that he knew it was me only and so he did like that. He said He lost all respect he had on me and said me to be happy and said he don't want any love from me. I started feeling guilty and i apologized him but still he didn't listen and said that I will never trust me so he said Byee.:(.

      And like this the relationship ended. I don't know wat to do sir. I am mentally very much attached to him.I feel It happened good only and I should forget him. I should not forget your help sir.You guided me throughout and I am very thankful to you.Maybe i wont contact you again for my problems as i have decided not to have any love relationship in my future life. But I will never forget your guidance sir. Lastly give me some advice or comments on what i did was right or wrong.

      Okay sir take care.. Bye...:)

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @chaitra,you are always welcomed...and any time you wish to meet me in person,i would be glad to...do take care for now...and i hope things are okay with you?

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      chaitra 6 years ago

      Ok sir. Thank you for making out time and replying even with your busy schedules.That is really great of you. And I will give attention to your advice. Thank you once again. Take care Sir.

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @Chaitra, i am sorry for the late replies, i have been too busy my dear, bear with me. talk to him about it, let him know how you feel, but my dear, i can't just tell you how best to know if he is using you to while away his loneliness; he is far and you are too...so just be patient till you guys meet first.

      concerning marriage, it might be too difficult to convince him to change his decision on that...men hardly do, and if they do, they always bounce back on same old decision during the long run.....just play wise for now. goodluck!

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      chaitra 6 years ago

      .

      Its okay sir.. Reply me whenever you are free only.. No problem..

      And I feel I still need some advice from You sir.. Please excuse me if I am giving you much troubles..

      Regarding the time issues that was worrying me, I am somehow convinced now.. But Now I am worried that Maybe he is playing around with me for whiling away his loneliness... I have this doubt 75% but i am not sure.. What should and can i do to find it out?? Shall I stop replying him for few days and see what he does or how he reacts?? Or shall I directly talk to him and clarify it?? Which would be the better way??

      And shall i conclude that he is not truely loving me because he is not ready to give up his decision on marriage??

      And one more problem is that even if I decide for the Breakup, he wont agree for it.. He will beg, apologise and gives explanation on all the things and convinces me to change my decision.. so i am in a dilemma whether to continue or quit...

      What would u say maybe the probabilities.. And please guide me...

      ?

      Thank you..

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @Chaitra, how i wished you could get a copy of my Ebook: Secret Exposure for single ladies at: www.lulu.com, i explained more than what you are requesting in that ebook, i made out time to spell out everything and steps ladies need to take to keep their relationship alive.

      okay, for the sake of your question, some men do use some ladies to while away loneliness and uncertainty, what do i mean? may be he has not truly found the girl he truly loves, so he just hang on with you to while away time while waiting to find his dream girl. again, he might be expecting great things to come when he finally meets you, so he just hang on to see what would happen,if you are as beautiful and attractive as he is fantasizing now...

      but remember, for a relationship to work out fine, the two partners must share a common religious value, that is very important, religion matters unless one partner is absolutely ready and willing to make a change from the heart, not just to be with the person, because things might not work smoothly as you wish.

      concerning time, some men value their financial welfare more than any other thing, while some value fun, women more than finance or career, may be he is that type that values his job, finance and career.

      men are highly influenced by physical presence, they are not like women who can hang on and get immediate satisfaction through emotional cares shown through: phone calls, sms and email messages. may be he is getting fade up with the long distant relationship, may be he is in dire need of a physical contact: touch, hold hands, hugs, etc....may be, so find out.

      the problem is neither from you nor from him, it is a problem of circumstances and condition of you guys meeting each other...but if you guys can't settle all the worries, quarrels, please it is better you guys call it quits now that it is earlier than when it is too late.

      regarding if he loves you, i can't just tell now, you are far, he is far, no physical attraction yet, nothing much to show, but he may be in love with you out of fantasies and imaginations and great expectation, but i can just say for now...

      i hope i answered your questions? and please bear with me for late replies, i have been a bit busy. take care Chaitra.

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      chaitra 6 years ago

      Hello sir, how r you?? and actually i am sorry that while telling my problem i have hid one fact from you... actually my guy had told clearly before getting into a relationship that he cannot marry me because of religious issues as we are from different religions.(In india its very much treated like a crime if we get married to a person from different religion). But i was seriously in love with him and i thought that i will change his decision and will convince him to marry me and so i got engaged with him. But now things are not going easy sir. He is strongly stuck to his decision. I have stopped talking about that matter with him. But what is the point in being in a relationship when we r not going to get married?? I stil thought what he told was practically right and so i only changed my decision..And he is very busy with his work. Not even on weekend holiday he spends some time with me. I am really frustrated with all these. If i say that I will break-up, then also he will convince me somehow that he loves me a lot and makes me change my decision of break-up.Always i keep on expecting him to give attention to me and spend time with me atleast weekly once but when it does not happen i get upset. So i am really tensed always worrying about it. So i thought I will seek your help. I wanted to know Is he really in love with me or he is just playing with my feelings?? and also I wanted to know whether This problem is from my side or from his side. What should I do now sir?? I feel bad on myself for always quarelling with him.. Am i wrong in expecting from him?? Please help me sir.. I am not able to judge him or anything.. I hope you will guide me to the right path..

      Thank You.

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      accofranco 6 years ago from L Island

      @FOREX NINJA, thanks for reading....glad you found the information helpful.....