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How to Make Friends and Persuade People to Do Things

Updated on October 27, 2021
Paul Kuehn profile image

Life has been a great teacher for me. I have learned more from my various jobs and experiences with people than from books.

Friends Laughing


The Importance of Friends

We are social animals so it is human nature for people to want to have friends. Friends are people who understand you because they share your same likes and dislikes. You can also count on friends for assistance and sympathy in times of need. Not everyone, however, has friends or many of them. This is undoubtedly due to the introverted nature of some people and their lack of self-confidence. Based on my experiences in life, I would like to suggest some ways to make friends and how to persuade them to do things for you.

Tips on How to Make Friends and Persuade Them to Do Things

Making friends is the hardest thing for some people to do. Due to my innate introverted personality, it was hard for me to make friends, too, until I started adopting the following measures which I will explain as tips for making friends and persuading people to do things for you:

1. Feel Good About Yourself and Express Self-Confidence: If you don't like or love yourself, how can you like or love others? Perhaps you don't like yourself because you are too heavy and have a body odor. If that's the case, lose weight and get rid of the body odor. It will make you feel a lot better about yourself and also give you self-confidence when interacting with other people.

2. Force Yourself To Be Outgoing: Since most people look out for themselves first, they are not going to be that eager to reach out and ask you to be a friend. For that reason, you cannot be shy or afraid to talk to people. Earlier in my life, I wasn't as successful as a real estate agent because I was afraid to contact people with cold calling. The other agents who were quite extroverted and had the gift of gab were able to reach out to clients and get the listings that I was unable to get.

3. Smile: Why is a dog man's best friend? It's simple. A dog is always smiling and projecting itself to be very friendly to people. If you want to show people that you are approachable to them, you must smile and it should be sincere. I have always felt more at ease with people who frequently smile when they talk with me.

4. Give People Compliments: Everyone likes to hear good sincere things about themselves. It makes people feel good about themselves. When meeting a person for the first time, you might give compliments such as: "I just love your dress." or "You have done a good job with your garden."

5. Call a Person by His or Her Name: Did you know that a person's name is the most important word a person likes to hear? When you meet a person, learn his or her name, and then use it often when you talk with the person. I guarantee the person will be very happy.

6. Find Out a Person's Interests: Most people are only interested in themselves; therefore, you must find out the other person's interests and talk about them. You'll be surprised how much people like to talk about themselves. While the other person is talking, you should be a good listener and not talk too much.

7. Mimic A Person's Speech and Body Language: You can do this by imitating a person's pronunciation and rate of speech, facial expressions, and gestures. This should not be done, however, to ridicule a person who for example has a lisp. The other person will probably not even know you are mimicking him or her; however, you will be subtlely connecting with the person.

8. Make a Person Feel Important: While you are talking with a person about their interests, don't be afraid to make comments to show how important their work is or how well-qualified they are to do their work

9. Get Someone to Agree with You by Showing That Something Is in His or Her Interest: Let's say that a person is quite good at planting trees; however, he is reluctant to come over to your house tomorrow to help you plant a tree. You could persuade him to help you by saying something like this: "John, I know that you are an expert in planting trees by just looking at your garden. You like planting trees, don't you?" John will probably answer yes, and then you could say, "I know you would enjoy helping me plant this cherry tree tomorrow."

If you don't develop self-confidence and get rid of shyness, you will never make friends. Try out the nine tips above and you'll be on your way to making friends and being an expert at how to make people do things for you.

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This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2011 Paul Richard Kuehn


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