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How To Say No To A Date

Updated on June 21, 2016

It can be a tricky situation when someone wants to date you, but you aren't interested in them romantically... especially if the person is a coworker or friend. The truth can be hurtful, and working up the courage to ask someone out can be difficult for some guys. Don't make it even harder for them in the future. Handle the issue with tact by using one of the excuses for not dating someone below.

Be kind and be clear! If there's no chance of you ever dating him, make sure he understands that... don't just say something like 'Sorry, I'm busy that night'. But also make sure he isn't going to go home and cry or be afraid to ever ask anyone out again.

"Sorry, I'm already in a relationship."

This can be used if it's true and you are actually in a relationship, or if you just don't want to hurt the person's feelings. Be careful with this one though... in today's world with online social sites such as Facebook a lie can be difficult to maintain if you actually know the person in real life.

"I want to be single at the moment."

Taking a little "me" time, perhaps after a bad breakup, is a good idea and also a good excuse if someone you don't like takes an interest in you. Simply tell the suitor that you're not ready to be in a relationship at the moment.

"I'm not romantically attracted to you."

Sometimes honesty is the best policy. If you can say it nicely, and explain that you like them a lot, but more like a family member than in a romantic way, this can be a great option.

"I don't date co-workers."

If the person works with you, an easy way to turn them down without hurting anybody's feelings is to say that you don't date people you work with. It's a good personal rule to have- imagine how awkward it could be if you broke up and still had to see each other every single day!

Your company may also have a policy against dating coworkers, which you can blame for your refusal.

Who are you trying to turn down gently?

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"I'm in love with somebody else."

Say that you have a crush on someone else, and are wanting to see if that goes anywhere. If you're not telling the truth, this one is best used on people that won't demand more details.

"I feel uncomfortable with our difference in ages."

If more than a couple of years separates you, you can use age as the reason you don't want to date them. This is slightly more personal than some of the other reasons to not date somebody, but is still nothing against their personality or appearance so shouldn't upset them much, if at all.

"I'm a lesbian."

If you're truly lost for a way to nicely say no and really don't want to upset them, you could tell them you are gay. Keep in mind that they may tell others and they will be confused (and possibly think you were lying to them) if you are ever in a future relationship they become aware of.


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    • Suzanne Day profile image

      Suzanne Day 4 years ago from Melbourne, Victoria, Australia

      I've had this problem before....and your hub had some great ideas on how to turn them down with finality! Thanks.