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How To Tell If She Is Cheating

Updated on July 17, 2011

Signs she is cheating

The old stereotype of a cheating spouse being an insensitive pig of a man is quickly disappearing. In today’s world, it is just as common for women to cheat as it is for men. We are catching up quickly with other gender: being able to vote, going to college, climbing the corporate ladder, flying airplanes, and now cheating on our beloved spouses. Maybe we just have an insatiable need for affection that can never be fulfilled by one man. Maybe women are starting to have a fear of commitment. Or maybe it is just payback time for all the cheating husbands in the world. Either way, it is a fact that married women are on the prowl looking for that emotional support buddy in the office, the big buff guy in the gym, or the sugar daddy we have always wanted. Guys, keep your women on a leash because they are going wild. The suspense of wondering if your woman is getting in on with another man can be torture. Luckily for you guys, I am giving you some inside advice, from a woman’s perspective, on how to tell if she is cheating.

Suspicious cell phone activity- If you suspect your woman is cheating then you are probably already checking her cell phone every chance you get. However, you don’t just want to check for repeat, late night calls to her best guy friend. Women are smarter than that. If you notice a lot of calls to a girl friend then might want to double check that number. It is possible that she has saved “Adam” as “Amanda” in her contact list to avoid looking suspicious. Another thing to pay attention to is how often you hear her cell phone ring. You may notice her checking her phone all the time but you never hear it ring. This is because she doesn’t want you to hear it. Women will often put their phone on silent to deter their man from checking it when it rings.

Going out with friends- I am not saying that women shouldn’t be allowed to hang out with their girlfriends. I am just saying that it is a great cover-up for cheating. If all of the sudden your girlfriend goes from going out once a month to going out once a week with the girls then you might have a problem. She could be getting her friends to cover for her while she is with her cuddle buddy. Or she may actually really be going out with the girls every week but chances are she is hooking up at the bar if it is becoming a more frequent habit.

Working late/Going to the gym- Lately it seems like she has been working tons of overtime but you’re not seeing any extra money for all the hard-worked hours. That is because she isn’t working them. What better alibi than being at work where she is probably unavailable to take your call? The gym is also a classic excuse, especially if you don’t have a membership at the same gym so she knows you can’t show up there to check on her. Plus, after a “hard workout” she has a great excuse to go straight to the shower when she gets home, which leads us to our next hint.

Rushing to the shower- If the woman has been out getting it on with another man, the first thing she is going to want to do when she gets home is shower. Sex can have a very strong smell sometimes and your woman doesn’t want you to smell cologne when you try to kiss her when she gets home. If she has been out fooling around she will probably head straight to shower and brush her teeth when she gets home.

Change in appearance- You have been together 5 years. She has gained 20 pounds, never does her hair anymore, and sweat pants are the newest trend. Suddenly, you start to notice her losing a few pounds, going to the tanning bed, getting her hair done, and dressing fabulously. You think she looks amazing but unless you have noticed her giving you a lot more nookie then she is probably changing her appearance to get the attention of another man.

Not giving it up- This one is a given. You are supposed to be her only source of pleasure but if she isn’t getting it from you, don’t think she is going without. If she wants some lovin’ and she isn’t satisfied at home then she will find it somewhere else.

Women cheat for a wide variety of reasons. Maybe she needs you to be more in tune with her feelings. Maybe you have a bad habit you need to drop. Maybe you just aren’t satisfying her in the sack. Who knows? A woman can walk into just any place and find a man who wants to have sex with her. Take good care of your lady or she will find someone who will. Cheating does not signal the end of a relationship. It is a signal for you to step up if you love her and want to keep her.


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    • profile image

      Skid 2 years ago

      Or maybe she is just malicious, or getting a thrill out of it.

      - As mine was.

    • profile image

      1stresponder 5 years ago

      Ryan, don't be a DUMBASS leave that hoe! she is going to wreak the rest of your life. if a guy cheats on a girl 9-10 times she wont take them back guys need to stop being pu55ys and flip that game the moment you suspect it you need to drop her like a ton of bricks.

      When they find there asses alone only then they can realized it was not the guys fault but there fucked up definition of the word "commitment".

    • profile image

      TO RYAN 6 years ago

      You must be the dumbest MOFO in the WORLD. Why did you take her back? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY????????? "BECAUSE SHE SAID"?? Sucker you should know by know that anything she says is a lie.

    • profile image

      ryan 6 years ago

      i treated my GF like a queen, took her on trips cruises u name it. loved her a lot but, while i was working out of time all the time in the oilfield she was sleeping with 2 different guys in our apt. complex after just moving in together there 3 weeks ago. she is pregnant now and i took her back cause she said its my baby but, i think shes with him again cause im on a job now and she wont answer my calls are text. and shes the sweets girl in the worl u would never guess shes doing this

    • profile image

      Ali 6 years ago

      BTW a very interesting article, i read it twice which makes me feel like i can know if my girl is cheating on me, but caution needs to be taken, cause sometimes our instincts can be wrong example a girl might just like to change her appearance not to cheat rather to protect her pride among other girls.

    • profile image

      Joe 6 years ago

      The reasons "why" are EXCUSES, and people use them both ways. You have a mind, and you're responsible for your decisions. Period.

    • profile image

      Corey B 6 years ago

    • profile image

      Star 7 years ago

      I have been cheated on twice and have the most amazing girl of my life now. I have done nothing different and things are 100 times better than they were before. But I do know from past experience that if a women is cheating to indicate a problem then I couldn't care less. Communication is the key to any relationship and if you run around chasing other men as a method to show me I need to change to keep you then that women is sorely mistaken. I would determine that the only problem is that she needs to get her ass thrown out with the rest of the garbage. No women i know, my girlfriend or friends included would keep a man after he cheated on her. It's a poor excuse and should be treated with a poor reception.

    • profile image

      Kabookie 7 years ago

      both men and women cheat for one reason, because they have no self control.

    • profile image

      orewinelvr (Kelly) 7 years ago

      I liked the article, I knew cheating was wrong but I found myself running around when my husband was deployed. I had a couple of friends that were going out a lot and when I turned 21, I started going out with them. I knew they were cheating but I looked the other way. After some time, I was introduced to an african american soldier that was friends with one of the other wives and all of us would hang out. When it got late, the other couples would go off to be alone and I felt left out. In time, he started coming over... then after more time went by, he would come over late... eventually, our friendship turned sexual and I was hooked. I was with a couple of other men since then and one day I just realized it was time to end it and end my marriage. My ONLY regret is I hurt my husband. I ended up leaving my husband and am happy now. I have cheated and been cheated on, I think we all know that if you aren't happy... just leave him/her... easier said then done when children are involved, chances at things getting better, or moral realizations... easier said than done. I'm happy now as a 25 yr old single mother... but yes, I remember the things mentioned in the article. I was selfish, I learned, but still my only regret is the hurt I caused... only that.

    • cblack profile image

      cblack 7 years ago from a beach somewhere

      Hi Ady. I agree with you that cheating is wrong no matter who does it and never meant to imply any different. This article was simply to point out some of the reasons why people choose to cheat and methods of confirming or denying the suspicions.

    • cblack profile image

      cblack 7 years ago from a beach somewhere

      Hi Steve. You are right that a little warmth does go a long way. I wrote this article quite some time ago and I notice now that the tone reflects a lot of things I was feeling at that time. Being cheated on really sucks and my heart goes out to anyone going through it.

    • profile image

      Ady 8 years ago

      The double standards that surround the topic of female infidelity always astound me. So if a woman cheats on a man, it's because the man isn't doing something right and, by implication his fault. Would it be acceptable to you if your partner said he cheated on you because you had a bad habit or weren't in touch with his feelings? Of course not. There appears to be a different set of rules for women in this regard.

      The way I see it, cheating is wrong, whomever does it, and it means the person you're with doesn't really love or care about you and needs to go. By saying a man needs to "step up his game" to keep a woman from cheating, you're basically saying it's OK for women to cheat on their partners if they don't get their own way, which is selfish and callow. Much like the tone of this article. Girl power, eh?

    • profile image

      Steve 8 years ago

      I think these are good tips - but the writer is cold, man! As it wasn't bad enough that you might think you're being cheated on - you look for advice and maybe some support and you find this! jeez! whoever you are, you need to remember a little warth goes a long way!

    • profile image

      orewinelvr 8 years ago

      Yeah, I did some of those things, nice article

    • profile image

      Dazza 8 years ago

      Your comment about if you love her and she's cheating then the man needs to step up and show more love and attention is crap. Just dump her with no regrets. That's what I did and she came begging to repair the relationship. I went out and found a new woman straight away and introduced her to my cheating girlfriend. She cracked up, had a crying fit, and then I told her to get out of my life. Threw her things out of our flat (I pay the rent) and that was it. Great. Her relationship with her cheating buddy ended a week later and she's still alone. Get's drunk a lot.

    • Randy Behavior profile image

      Randy Behavior 9 years ago from Near the Ocean

      But the new underwear were just for me.... really.

      Great hub cblack!

    • Triplet Mom profile image

      Triplet Mom 9 years ago from West Coast

      cblack, I agree with JG great hub add some pics to make it pop!!

    • Veronica profile image

      Veronica 9 years ago from NY

      The change in appearance thing is very true. Buying new underwear, suddenly going to the gym... oh yeah. Tell Tale Signs.

    • cblack profile image

      cblack 9 years ago from a beach somewhere

      Thanks JGaunt. I appreciate the advice!!

    • jGaunt profile image

      jGaunt 9 years ago from London

      This is a nice first hub. I like your topic and you are clearly a very good writter. I would like to make some suggestions though. I think you should ad some pictures and video to it. You can get free pictures from photobucket and flickr. Also you should have 15 or so tags, so ad some.

      If you need help there are a bunch of hubs on how to make better pages and how to get people to come read your pages. Also you can ask for help on the forum.

      Good luck


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