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How Am I Dealing With Resentment

Updated on February 22, 2019
DDE profile image

Devika enjoys sharing her work with a friendly community. Writing is a big part of her life. Online work has improved her lifestyle.

Resentment and people

She spoke with an unfriendly manner has an evil eye too. I realized her conversations were very abrupt toward me, and tried to be friendly throughout the evening but that didn't work out as well.

The strong angry emotions that I sensed from this individual did not disappear this woman has been this way since I had opened my summer business.

Even though she showed me resentment and hatred I totally ignored her harsh behaviors. I don't think she knows any better than that. I can't change the way she behaved but can do better, and be better for myself.

I did not want to feel down or depressed, and decided to write about my experience. In all this time I know this person; I have not had to cope with her odd side until a year ago.

I don't visit her anymore, and feel it is best to keep my distance. My life is different to that of hers, and I chose to live in a way I know that would make me happy. Her traditional lifestyle has stopped her from being the person I am. The envious look through her eyes explained everything.

She looked at me with intense feelings of hate. Gossip is a number one part of her daily activities.

She tends to disagree with almost everything I speak of and assumes she knows me.

I have overcome many obstacles.

The resentment experience is a small one.

I have no intention of having her in my life. She is just not worth my valuable time.

I have picked up new tips from all of my experiences from such people.

Burn fire with fire:

I believe these types of people deserve to be burned more with my great achievements. I let them know of what I have achieved and see the changes in their behaviors.

Burning fire with fire is a helpful way for me though may not work for everyone else.

The more good news I have the more I flash it.

Confrontation is good.

The person with hate, and resentment, or jealousy is purely a cunning person.

Be careful of how you approach these types of people.

They need to know that you know about their gossips and resentfulness.

Don't be afraid to let them know.

The kind of people who resent you is those who don't have what have in your life.

I have seen this many times through my personal experiences, and often I am faced with such resentment.

The one who resents you has issues with self-confidence, self-doubt, a low self-esteem and they self-loath.

· What caused this woman to be resentful toward me?

She sees I am self-confident and speak out my mind.

I have what she may never have in her life. Love, happiness, is a great part of my life.

I am always the center of attraction and she is not.

I always dress well.

My modern lifestyle causes her resentment toward me.

She can't cope with my way of life.

I live an active lifestyle and she is the complete opposite of me.

She notices my smart decisions.

Poorly educated people can behave in this manner.

Different levels of life.

Her negative way of life is destroying good friendships.

I observed resentment from this person when I got to know more about her.

When at one time I felt a good friendship could derive from our acquaintances.

She has intense anger.

I have noticed animal instincts in this individual.

The attack mode surprised me in the presence of others.

Some people don't know how to control their emotions.

I understand that the mentality is different here and forgive her for that behavior.

I am just myself and she is just herself allowing for such differences.

I am in control and won't let my wild emotions take over my thoughts.

I connect with my life spiritually, and feel free in my mind of all that goes on with people and resentment.

My values are important to me and I will not let her resentment get to my head or to my heart.

What makes her feel good does make me feel good.

My observations tell me that she is going through an abusive relationship.

The irritable signs and differences have shown me about her hateful behavior.

Resentfulness is built up on anger, gossip, and intolerance, hurt, less-valued, or unnoticed.

Here the woman is not noticed and needs attention from someone.

Unfortunately, her approach to life is very different and troublesome.

I have more attention and that is not making her feel good toward me.

Instead she behaved in a resentful way.

I have increased my positive thinking to avoid noticing resentment in others.

My greater challenges have opened my way to many experiences.

I am dependable.

I have taken on responsibilities that only a few can take on.

I am reliable and find faith in my hopeful thinking power.

I am committed and honest in my daily lifestyle.

My open-mind had allowed me to be this way.

I have a good sense of humor which not many people have here.

I was raised in a respected life and that won't fade away from me.

In my old and new experiences I have been courageous and powerful in all my actions.

I am not perfect and don't expect everyone to be perfect or like me.

Resentment has never been part of me and will never be.

Everything I wanted or want in my life has come from my own ideas and dreams.

I did not and don't dream of what others have or possess.

I pity those who feel resentment toward another person.

I learned from my new life in Croatia and the more I noticed of other people the better that was for me.

I don't need to lick up to such persons or any other persons.

I don't need her acceptance.

I am just who I am different and special in my own way.

I feel good when I am with happier and friendlier people.

Life is full of surprises and this was one of my surprises.

Having to have had experienced resentfulness from someone whom I once felt could be a good and friendly person to me.

That had really disappointed me.

I did not see this one coming my way.

Her bitterness gave me the opportunity to see her true self.

I also figured out her emotional bitterness. Being married to a husband with Post traumatic stress Disorder (PTSD) is another problem.

Coping with a husband in such depressive state and mentally that can be overwhelming.

Forgive and move on. Holding a grudge is not going to make you the better person.

Let go of what you don't have control over.

People are different and behave differently. Accepting those types of behaviors does not always come your way.

Don't be as they are and show them that too.

Acceptance is difficult from both sides.

I show people my uniqueness and know nobody can be me.

My true smiles have got me to see the greatness of life itself.

You can have anger, hate, and gossip for as much as you would like to.

When it comes to having what you deserve nobody should try and take that away from you.

· Life is too precious to live in anger and to feel resentment.

Clear Resentment

Resentment images

Let go of Resentment

Be free of hatred

''Strength of character means the ability to overcome resentment against others, to hide hurt feelings, and to forgive quickly.''

by Lawrence G. Lovasik

Resentment and hatred

How would you deal with resentment?

See results

Hatred and Jealousy

''Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.''

Carrie Fisher

This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.

© 2014 Devika Primić


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    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      ChitrangadaSharan Thank you for the vote up. Sometimes people are just so not who they really are. I appreciate you stopping by.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi Anamika S I too feel exactly the same as you.'' I don't give a damn what anyone thinks of me.'' My life and my way. Thank you for commenting.

    • ChitrangadaSharan profile image

      Chitrangada Sharan 

      4 years ago from New Delhi, India

      Quite an engaging hub and thanks for sharing this with us. I know you are a positive and brave person and that is most important.

      Voted up!

    • Anamika S profile image

      Anamika S Jain 

      4 years ago from Mumbai - Maharashtra, India

      I am normally good and helpful, but I prefer to keep away from toxic personalities. I don't give a damn what anyone thinks of me. What matters to me is that I feel good about myself.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi D.A.L. thank you for the vote up, interesting and useful. Resentment is evil and she is just that. I am keeping my distance and showing my happiness openly. Something not everyone can have and will have due to their small minds. I appreciate you stopping by take care!

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi stricktlydating, interesting question but I find it hard to believe she could be so envious. I understand her reasons and did not expect such a change from this woman. I am so over with her ''so called'' friendship. Thank you for sharing such kinds.

    • stricktlydating profile image


      4 years ago from Australia

      How could anyone have resentment towards you! You seem amazing. And I love your attitudes in life as well as your writing...

    • D.A.L. profile image


      4 years ago from Lancashire north west England

      Devika, your written words " One life and one way to go. You can have anger,hate ,gossip for as much as you want to,but when it comes to having what you deserve nobody should try and take it away from you" is so true. This cruel and cold acquaintance does not deserve your friendship and you do right to keep a distance from her. excellent read. Voted up interesting and useful.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      dilipchandra12 thank you.

    • dilipchandra12 profile image

      Dilip Chandra 

      4 years ago from India

      So good to see the way you tackled this issue well.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hello tobusiness'' Life is too short to engage in bitterness, rise above it every time.'' Well said and that is exactly how I see it. Thank you for stopping by.

    • tobusiness profile image

      Jo Alexis-Hagues 

      4 years ago from Lincolnshire, U.K

      Devika, another excellent topic. Resentment is a cancer that can eat away at a person until they become deaf and blind to reason. It's impossible not to feel hurt by such behaviour, but in your case, you can see plainly where this women's bile is coming from. Life is too short to engage in bitterness, rise above it every time. Great article.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi Harishprasad, It is always a pleasure to read comments and thoughts of my followers. You are no exception! Cold and ruthless is what these people can be. Thank you for the vote up, and shared.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Ericdierker I so agree with you. Thank you very much for sharing your comment here .

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi suzettenaples, It is always so pleasing to read your comments. I can count on you to share your mind greatly. ''I do try to diffuse that resentment through humor.'' Works perfectly for me. I am glad you have your way too. Thank you very much.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      billybuc thank you very much for stopping by

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi ologsinquito, thank you very much.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi MartieCoetser, Creating a distance works perfect for me. Thank you for sharing such a helpful comment. Have a lovely weekend!

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi MsDora I am happy to read another comment from you thank you kindly.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      m abdullah javed such people don't mean much to me. Thank you.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi AliciaC I am really sorry for her behavior and see that that is just how some people are and can't be any other way. I don't care for her thank you for stopping by.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      4 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi RachaelOhalloran, resentment is one of my issues at the moment others stuff I ignore. I opened up on this topic due to me feeling slightly down. I am quite surprised that some people don't see this behavior especially those who are friends with this person. Any how I don't care for her and will always show my successes and just be who I am. My lifestyle is showing her the true me. Your comment is detail and perfect explanations makes me feel so much better. Thank you.

    • m abdullah javed profile image

      muhammad abdullah javed 

      4 years ago

      I admire, you always try to put your innerself before us. It shows the values you possess. Just analyse the situation and react in a way that has been depicted here, the negativity will no longer exist. The immorality does not stand before high morals.

    • AliciaC profile image

      Linda Crampton 

      4 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      I'm sorry that you have to deal with this person, Devika. I'm sorry for her in a way, too. It sounds like she has a difficult life. I love the quotes about resentment that you've shared!

    • RachaelOhalloran profile image

      Rachael O'Halloran 

      4 years ago from United States

      If you examine the emotion of "resentment," it is the opposite of admiration. They had to admire something about you first - some quality or way of life you have that they wish to have for themselves - before they could come to resent it. Therefore, inwardly they admire that quality in you, yet resent you for having it.

      Usually when people admire something in us, they become a friend. But some people are not wired right, they become jealous and it goes the other way. They become an adversary who tries to make social occasions very difficult for others, but in the end, it is they who are not enjoying themselves.

      Resentment is usually one-sided and not mutual between the two people. While it is their problem why they feel that way, confrontations with people like this almost never work out well for either party - no matter what excess baggage they have in their own background (PTSD, etc.). If they do not put their resentment aside (or resolve it), it will slow cook to a boil and become hatred.

      One wastes more energy resenting and hating than one does on showing love/like/congeniality. To love takes almost no effort. Being constantly in the state of "hate" can be exhausting, showing as stress on their face and in their demeanor with others. Some people even become ugly and others who are observing them will notice that. .

      On the other hand, you, the target, are also being observed, how you handle them and each situation as it comes up.

      Being true to yourself, continuing to live as you would normally, interacting with your friends shows a good example. The positive, diplomatic way you handle yourself will speak loudly to that person (and any observers) about your true-ness. It will also be very persuasive in showing the "hater" that their resentment toward you is misguided. The hater will see that your circle of friends also admire that same quality in you, yet those friends don't resent you for having it. It is a quality that made them want to be your friend, not a foe. In time, the hater will see that their resentment of you does nothing to endear them to all of your friends (possible snubbing) and will find that it is more enjoyable to be in your circle of friends, than it is to be on the outside looking in.

      Even if their hatred is never resolved, you have been positive and diplomatic in handling the situation which makes your friends admire you more and makes you more comfortable in social arenas. By surrounding yourself with true friends, when they see the person's resentment or hatred toward you, your actions and how you handle yourself will make them support you. Show by example (action) - not words or confrontations.

      The hater will either drift to the background, move on to someone else they admire (i.e. resent) or possibly may get over their resentment of you so it turns back to admiration. In the end, if they want to change their lot, the effort is on them, not you.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 

      4 years ago from The Caribbean

      Devika, you're one brave soul. Cheers!

    • MartieCoetser profile image

      Martie Coetser 

      4 years ago from South Africa

      Envy is most of the time the instigator of resentment and rudeness, and we, being who we are, cannot destroy another person's envy. So, best is to create a distance in order for us to not feel that painful resentment, and simply be polite when contact is unavoidable.

    • ologsinquito profile image


      4 years ago from USA

      +1 that's the way to approach these folks.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 

      4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      I'm sorry you've been treated like that. I don't deal with it. I give them one chance to speak their mind and get things out in the open, and then I move on to people who actually enjoy my company.

    • suzettenaples profile image

      Suzette Walker 

      4 years ago from Taos, NM

      Devika, A ver interesting and though-provoking article. I have to agree with everything you have written. I have faced resentment many times in my life. I have led a non- traditional life at times and felt the blow of resentment. I, however, am at peace with all the decisions I have made in my life. I find those that resent me are unhappy with their life choices and project their anger on me instead of themselves. I do try to diffuse that resentment through humor. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. Success is the best medicine for these types of people and like you I don't keep them around me. Great article!

    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 

      4 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Resentments internalized are stone cold killers. Getting rid of or dealing with the properly is paramount. Great hub Devika

    • Harishprasad profile image

      Harish Mamgain 

      4 years ago from New Delhi , India

      Devika, the way you describe how people behave and act and then explain all that, makes an interesting read.

      These are such important life lessons that one should take note of in order to live a dignified and balanced life. Additionally, the quotes are great.

      Voted up and shared.


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