- Gender and Relationships
How to Attract Emotionally Distant Woman
There is a time in every mans life when he will run into a woman who seems beyond emotionally distant. She might seem emotionless all together, or simply seem to lack any valuable emotions around the man who wants to capture her heart. Essentially, it seems like a woman that you can't have, and that makes her even more valuable.
When you run into a woman of this nature, you have two choices. 1. You can choose to ignore that instinctual impulse to climb and conquer, because it's mostly just lust you're experiencing. Or 2. you find a way to help this woman become attracted to you, in the hopes that a relationship will bud from there.
If you're going with the latter option, then keep reading.
Aloofness can be a hard characteristic to grab just the right way. Some will refer to it as being a jerk or acting apathetic, but that's not really what being aloof is about.
The idea, is that this woman is probably very used to getting a lot of attention from the men folk in her environment. So if you add yourself to the ranks of men swooning over her, then you're automatically off her radar. She wants a man who will intrigue her and do something different from the rest of the men her life. She's already got plenty of flatterers, and probably plenty of jerks in her life, so you need to be that one special guy who is neither her obsessed follower or a jerk. You need to be aloof.
You can practice being aloof by not giving her any undue attention and by toning down the attention that is due to her. Don't blow her off or ignore her, but make giving her your direct attention, your last priority. When she comes into a room, find something else to do or someone else to talk to. When she's near you, keep yourself focuses away from her. If she starts up a conversation, listen and respond, but try to get away from the conversation politely and quickly, as if you had something more important to pay attention to.
Flirt with everyone else
Flirting is a special kind of friendly behavior. When you flirt with someone, you give them your full attention, at least for a moment. You let them feel a little bit special because you are giving them that full attention and are not likely to be very attracted by some other distraction in the room.
The trick to this tip, is to make sure that you are flirting with everyone in the room. Men and women a like. Your goal isn't to overdo it, or to accidentally attract someone else, so do be careful and courteous. Your goal is to show that you can be flirtatious, and are on a regular basis, but that you are specifically not giving that attention to the woman of your true desire.
This tip works so well, because most emotionally distant woman are usually the type of woman who wants to chase, not be chased. So by flirting with others in the room and being aloof, you are giving her the opportunity to chase you.
Become her friend
What is a true friend?
They are someone that we can act naturally around. Someone we don't have to show off for. Someone that we can rely on and that we can open up to. A true friend is a person we trust and are loyal to.
So if you thought that above steps were difficult, adding this one to the mix make things seem harder from your current perspective, but they will win over an emotionally distant woman a lot sooner than any other method.
Aside from preferring to chase, many emotionally distant women have been hurt in their past relationships. It probably doesn't help anything that they often ignore the nice honest guys, and go for the jerks who are acting apathetic. So these women are really seeking a companion. Someone who can do more than just satisfy their carnal urges. Someone who can be a true friend.
If you can prove yourself to be friendship material, then you can get in the door to becoming this woman's friend. From there it's up to you whether or not she's worth getting into a relationship with. Becoming her true friend, might show you some sides of her that just aren't that appealing, so keep that in mind.
In order to get the opportunity to be her friend, you'll want to make some opportunities for her to get to know you, without forcing it on her. Try inviting a bunch of your mutual friends to a party and have them invite the woman of your desire to come to the party. Or show up with a small group of friends, at a place that you know your woman usually hangs out at. Get creative here, to make sure the opportunities for friendship are available, but don't cross over into the stalker realm...
Be open and honest about who you really are
I know this can be a complicated tip when you are purposefully trying to be aloof and flirtatious around this woman, when you'd really rather be fawning over her and treating her like a queen. But you still have to figure out how to make it work for you. You need to be calm and collected around her, but still give her the chance to get to know the real you.
Part of doing this, is already wrapped up in becoming her friend, but even if you don't get that opportunity, you still need to give this woman the chance to get to know the real you. Without giving her any undue attention and without ignoring her. This is best done in groups of friends, where everyone can be open and share, and not just you.
Don't say yes to the first offer
It's a basic rule in business that also applies to dating. NEVER say yes to the first offer. If you can help it, try to avoid saying yes to even the second offer, but hint that another offer might sway your attention.
This works particularly well with emotionally distant women, especially when they already know that they've got at least a little bit of your attention. If they are a woman who is used to being the center of attention, or whom seems to hide their romantic feelings from you, then she will be intrigued by your ability to turn her down. It will heighten that "hunt" instinct in her and make you seem all that more appealing. If you gave in on her first try, you're too easy and she'll probably be done with you in an instant.