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Becoming the Honorable Maid of Honor

Updated on July 17, 2014
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So your sister, best friend or closest cousin is getting married and has asked you to be the maid of honor. Receiving an invitation to be a part of a wedding party is always special, but being asked to be the bride’s right-hand-girl is quite the honor.

While being the maid of honor is flattering, you don’t want to take this role lightly. These are important shoes to fill. You can expect it to be much more than just wearing a slightly different dress than the identical bridesmaids’ apparels. And it requires more obligations than holding the bride’s bouquet during a wedding ceremony. From the engagement party all the way up to the wedding day, this role comes with a great deal of responsibility. There are also some important do’s and don’ts to ensure that you nail the position and things go smoothly.

Here are some guidelines to help you become the maid of honor that is truly honorable.


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Duties and Responsibilities of the Honorable Maid of Honor

Most brides know what they want and desire things to go as close to perfect as possible. One of your duties is to help reduce wedding stress by being her right-hand girl.

The following duties and responsibilities help accomplish this goal.


1. Be the Bride’s Personal Assistant

Taking on this role of the maid of honor doesn't mean that you have become bride’s slave during the wedding planning process. Instead, it simply means that you are making yourself available to help her out with completing certain tasks and maintaining organization. It’s a duty that should be done with complete gratefulness in heart.

If you're not sure where to begin, here are a few tips:

  • Go through the bridal magazines with your bestie and take trips together to the different bridal boutiques. This is a great way to help the bride-to-be gather inspiration and come up with ideas for the big day.
  • With plenty of things to do and time winding down, the bride could use your help with managing her to-do list and keeping up with important appointment dates. You can keep a calendar for yourself and give her friendly reminders when needed.
  • The fiancé may not be able to accompany the bride to every appointment or consultation throughout the wedding planning process. You can make it appoint to go with her so that she has support and weighted opinions to ease indecisiveness. This also includes assisting with the wedding registry if needed.
  • When it comes to taking on tasks, take your direction from the bride. If you’re not sure what to do, ask the bride periodically if there is anything that she would like you to specifically help out with. Then go from there. Just be prepared to do a variety of things from making phone calls and running errands to DIY craft projects.


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2. Coordinate an Unforgettable Bridal Shower and Bachelorette Party

Get together with the bridesmaids and the bride's mother to help plan a nice shower. Just be sure to consult with the bride first to see what type of get-together she is expecting. Also, have an idea of what the shower theme will be. Once you have this in mind, you can find the perfect invites and send them out to the bride's family and friends.

During the shower, your job as maid of honor will be to lead everyone into the party games and select the prizes. This can be a lot of fun. However, the most fun is usually reserved for the bachelorette party.

Planning the bachelorette party is when you get to really make your mark and create a memorable night that will cherished for a lifetime. Whether it is a spa day or a ladies night out, if done right, it can bring the whole wedding planning experience to a proper close and give the bride-to-be an evening that will truly be reinvigorating and make her ready to transition to the married life.


3. Offer a Listening Ear to the Bride

Because you were chosen to be the maid of honor, it’s probably safe to say that you know the bride-to-be quite well. That’s what makes you a good candidate for lending a listening ear when she needs one. When things get hectic and stressful (and they will, especially as you get closer to the wedding day), you can be there for moral support.

No need to offer advice, unless it’s asked. Just simply be there to listen. As you attended to her during all the excitement, continue to have a presence throughout any outbursts and help sooth anxieties.


4. Help with Wedding Day Preparations and Emergencies


When the big day finally arrives, the maid of honor acts as the wedding coordinator's side-kick. However, the concentration should solely be to the bride. Nails, hair or last minute wardrobe emergencies...no worries...you got this.

It does help to have an emergency kit on hand to make things go smoother. Here's a checklist to help:


5. Give a Spectacular Wedding Toast

Only a chosen select get the opportunity to grab the microphone and share a few words during the reception. As the maid of honor, you have earned that right. Often times, it is expected.

The toast can be long and sappy. But it can also be short and sweet. All that matters is that it is coming from the heart and will make the newlyweds smile.

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A Few Important Do's Don'ts

Now, here are a couple of do's and don'ts for the maid of honor...that is, one that is truly honorable. This will help ensure that you do a job well done and everyone is at peace.


Always Take Direction from the Bride

Brides can be picky, but It's about what they want anyway.


Don’t ever get the feeling that you are running the show or boss others around.

Do communicate with the other people in the bridal party and make sure that everyone is included.


Don’t get offended if the bride doesn't always take your advice or like a suggestion.

Do continue to be happy for her, offer support and avoid complaining.

© 2014 Crissylite

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