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How to Effectively Break Up

Updated on August 4, 2015

How to get someone to break up with you

Was able to learn first-hand how to break up a most perfect relationship, and thought to share it with you in case you wanted or needed to learn.

Seems kinda simple when you want, but all the more difficult when you don't want it to end. So, let me give you some simple steps you can apply to end a relationship, or love triangle, or whatever you feel like calling it this week. These tips are effective no matter the length or depth of that relationship, they will work. Trust me.

1) Assumption: Make sure you bring this into the mix, because this is the pre-cursor for destroying all the rest of whatever you two have built into that relationship. In fact, this little key right here is the demise of all communication from that point forward. You'll be amazed when you use this tip how quickly things will spiral.

2) Stop listening: Be very good at being an inactive listener. That's right. Make sure when your partner is talking you are preoccupied with other thoughts and duties. This way, you'll never be aware of what the other was saying, no matter how well you multi-task. Along with the first, this covertly nice trick should work well for you to end it pretty quickly.

3) Don't say I love you: This is it. The ultimate slam. If you wanna finally nail that coffin closed, do this number and you're guaranteed to get a response. If even for one day, because maybe you feel insecure, try not using this little 3-word phrase and that should be the ball game.

4) Disappoint them : If the first three are not working, make sure you're consistent with disappointing that person over, and over so your track record can speak for itself. Nobody likes anyone being faithful about their word or commitment to do things on time or as prescribed.

5) Make excuses: Be consistent with being late for appointments, or dinner, or phone calls. Things like that will help slow the pace to a crawl so that you can more easily back off a bit with your commitment, so when the time is right for them to dump you... It's easy.

I am grateful to for helping me to add these tips here as it enlists the necessary actions anyone would use to strategically plan and execute before moving on.

Things never seem to naturally fit into place, they simply require better communication. Learning how actions and words can be projected more clearly, and identifying the state of the audience or the one to who you're speaking to will be more authentic to influence your point.

Stephen Covey writes "Communication breakdowns result when people interpret the same event differently ‘As we project our conditioning experiences onto the outside world, we assume we’re seeing the world the way it is. But we’re not. We’re seeing the world as we are, or as we have been conditioned to be. And until we gain the capacity to step out of our own autobiography – to set aside our own glasses and really see the world through the eyes of others – we will never be able to build deep, authentic relationships and have the ability to influence others in positive ways."

Focus is important. Whether you choose to focus on limitations, or possibilities. Your focus describes you. It describes your intent, and your desire for what you want as priorities for what's important.

Again, nobody cares knows how much you care, until you care to show them how much.

Hope you like these tips I have given you to improve your striking out with that woman or man in your life that at one time meant so much, but is now relegated to the back seat of memories. If you would like more tips on how to keep a relationship strong, I would certainly suggest doing just the opposite. Assumption is the demise of all good communication just as much as being an active listener is important to your partner.

Lastly, the simple phrase, 'I love you" known throughout every culture are not just words but actions that are shown in circles of commitment. If your actions in the past showed any sense of the word commitment, then it's not quickly undone all at once. It does take time to unravel a 3-strand cord. Take time today to re-commit to what matters.


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    • dashingscorpio profile image


      3 years ago

      Welcome to HubPages StreetShepherd!

    • StreetShepherd profile imageAUTHOR


      3 years ago from Everywhere you are

      Thank you dashingscorpio, it means much to have you review my post with your expertise. Have enjoyed reading your column. and hope to make the grade soon.

    • dashingscorpio profile image


      3 years ago

      Your article really reads more like finding a way to cowardly have the other person breakup with you as opposed to you breaking up with them.

      Nevertheless that still could be an interesting topic. Maybe edit the title and make it about: How to get someone to breakup with you.

      It could include things like disappoint them over and over again, not call when you say you will, come up with excuses to cancel dates at the last moment, apologize, and repeat until they break things off or gradually stop initiating contact....etc

      However if someone was going to have the big sit down to end a relationship I would say the steps are Plan, Execute, and Move on. Awhile back I wrote about this which may help with being more direct.


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