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How to Online Date Wisely

Updated on March 9, 2016

Tinder Tinder...give me happiness like Kinder...

Online dating is one of the quickest ways I know of to "shop" for guys/girls, and to be honest, it is also one of the worst ways after speed dating. Speed dating is worse than having fast food for 7 days, 3 meals per day. It is not very useful and a superb waste of time, because you are basically judging someone based on a 3 minute conversation, for like 1 hour with 10+ other people... I know, I know, My article title is "How to Online Date Wisely". Stay online, I will get to it!

Online dating can be very superficial, you choose who you want to talk to mainly by the users profile photos, and a description (or none at all). However, it can be very effective if you are careful, and if you be wise. I prefer using a proper dating site than just a dating app, since a dating site includes more information of a user than an app...so what should you do when you are trying out an online dating site?

First, choose the type of people you like based on a simple profile. It would be easier if you used the filter function on the website. For example, if you don't want to meet a smoker, or you prefer to meet people with certain religions/hobbies/careers/etc, or you want a specific age range, or even check when someone was last online, you can filter the users. That way, you can save a lot of time choosing who you want to talk to.

Secondly, ask the right questions. Well, I am not saying you should have a job interview with the person you are talking to (though that could be useful), but feel free to ask what the person is looking for on the dating site. You can "screen out" a lot of people who are just looking for fun, or are actually serious. Start a relaxing conversation asking what the person did for the day, what they enjoy doing, what they will do for the weekend, then gradually ask her/him out for a date to find out more.

Thirdly, let the other person know about you too. A relationship has to be mutual. You can tell the person you are talking to the same things you asked them. Don't be the only person talking though, if the person doesn't respond, they are usually either not interested or busy. So no rush. You have a lot of people you can talk to.

Another thing is, paid sites are usually of better quality, but even Christian sites don't guarantee only good people will talk to you, free sites might work just as well.

Last but not least, especially to those looking for a serious relationship, don't go crazy searching for someone. At the end of the day, you still need time to develop a relationship with a person. And if you do use a dating site, use it wisely. All the best!

Online Dating Final Success

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    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 

      2 years ago

      There is some very sound advice in your hub.

      The main thing people should know when it comes to online dating in my opinion is (you) are responsible for choosing who you engage with along with having (your own) "screening process".

      Online dating sites are nothing more than a "tool" for meeting new people. Much like a (fork) is a tool for eating.

      You can eat a garden salad or a slice of double fudge cake.

      However an obese person would never blame their weight gain on their fork!

      And yet people who have bad online dating experiences will blame the whole online dating industry. If you find yourself having one bad date/relationship after another it's probably time for you to reexamine (your) "mate selection criteria".

      Each of us (chooses our own) friends, lovers, and spouse.

      It's not (where) you meet but (who) you meet that counts.

      Always use good commonsense when dealing with strangers online and offline. Get to know people over emails and phone calls before meeting.

      Most of your "screening process" should happen before you meet!

      Going out with everyone who asks you will only lead to burn out.

      Be selective and choose wisely. Know yourself, Love yourself, Trust yourself. It's something doesn't feel right to you it's probably not right for you.

      The first date should be a lunch at a neutral place where both people drive their own cars. The goal is to find out if you have in person chemistry, similar sense of humor, likes/dislikes, and interests.

      Don't feel obligated to have a second date if the first one wasn't great.

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