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How to Stay Attractive for Your Husband-The Danger of Pajama Pants and other Slothful Grooming Habits!
article by Rain San Martin
Why You Should Keep Up Your Looks as Wife
Lets face it, if sexual attraction to our mate were unimportant, then we would all be able to go through life as a celibate nun, missionary, or solitary worker. Practicing the discipline of singleness for God is great for those chosen for a specific mission. Most likely however, you didn't marry for friendship alone. There was a physical chemistry which drew you to your spouse. Those feelings of romance and spark were not created by God as a trap to make us procreate, they were meant to continue as part of the magic and "glue of marriage".
When you keep up your looks you are being loving to your spouse. You may also notice that when you regularly put effort into looking good, and respond to his tastes and preferences, he may do the same for you. Looking put together will also make you feel great. Boosting your confidence and making you more productive.
Men Generally are Attracted to Longer Hair-Forget the Cultural Trends
Beware of Pajama Pants!
In the article Is it Wrong for a Wife to "Let Herself Go" After Marriage? – Christ, Freedom, and the Law of Beauty we see the startling reality of one mans perspective:
"It may take two years, or ten years, or twenty, and it may take two children or four or none, but eventually the wife (in this story) no longer cares to look good for her husband. As soon as she comes home, she puts on the old pajama pants and shapeless sweat shirt. She may dress up for outings with their friends, but if it’s only a date for the two of them then she wears jeans and a t-shirt and no makeup. In fact, over time, she might leave her legs and armpits unshaven, at least for long periods of time, stop bothering to make her hair, and so forth."
He goes on to say that the fruit of his wife's actions has made him feel disrespected, neglected, taken for granted and needlessly tested in his hearts faithfulness. Her slovenly appearance has nothing to do with growing older. Don't make the same mistake yourself.
A Positive Attitude will Make You Appear More Beautiful
Grooming and Hygiene
More than any other grooming habit, brushing your teeth at the very start of each morning is non-other than urgent! This is not for the sake of dental care, but to rid all traces of morning breath. Brush after each meal for dental hygiene.
Scripture Warns Us to Have Substance for Lasting Inner Beauty
"Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God." (-Peter 3:3-4)
As we enter into old age, though our skin may lose it's luster our character can continually shine a light on our inner beauty. That is, for those who seek a pure heart and live in a state of childlike wonder. Notice how much older a woman appears who is bitter, harsh and brash than one whom is positive, grateful and excited about life.
Be warned however, as scripture is to be interpreted in light of scripture. Some women mistakenly use this passage as a justification for neglecting their looks. If one holds an office job they are still expected to look professional regardless of their schedule, hold the same respect for your homemaking attire or while you are at home (if you have a day job outside of the home).
Keep Your Look Traditionally Feminine as You Age
In Old Age Avoid the Unisex Look
At the turn of the 20th century fashion customs made it clear whom the male or female was. In their senior years, women wore their hair long (though pulled up). Dresses flowed down to their ankles. Their waists were pulled inward to reveal a feminine hourglass shape. Now in the modern era of the 21st century seniors in their 70's, 80's and 90's not only wear bulky unflattering pants, they put on box shaped tops and crop their hair as short as their husbands. In old age, we need to make an extra effort to communicate a sense of lovely femininity.
Flylady Explains the Importance of Getting Ready Every Day
Timeless Physical Beauty Tips
- Go easy on plastic surgery, if at all. As we age, it's better to let the face fall naturally.
- Work out daily.
- Wear tasteful makeup at the start of each day. (If you practice this particular beauty custom).
- Get dressed from head to toe.
- Grow hair long. No matter what your age.
Look the Best You Can For Your Husband-He Doesn't Expect Perfection
One of the most beneficial habits to develop is to get dressed from head to toe, at the first of each morning. Not only will you assure you look presentable and lovely for your spouse, you'll be ready for anything! If someone drops by at the last minute, you wont have to feel embarrassed that your look like a mess. Never settle for wearing pajama pants or sweats around the house again. Above all don't be caught in the grocery store or walking your children to school in such slovenly attire.
Getting completely ready with makeup and shoes will provide the following benefits:
- be ready for drop ins
- look nice for your husband
- feel confident
- be more productive
In the blog post "Stay Attractive For Him" Lori Alexander, a Christian woman married 33 years teaches that men do not expect perfection. You need simply to put forth your best effort.
What one change would make you more attractive to your husband?
Ways to Show Your Inner Beauty by Serving Your Husband
- Commit to being a good and wife of noble character. helpmate
- Give him words of affirmation.
- Listen with a gentle spirit.
- Make his favorite meals.
- Always be available for physical intimacy. "The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control." ( 1 Corinthians 7:5)
- Be joyful
- Show him respect
- Give him words of affirmation
- Gently share your concerns with your husband at an appointed time, or write a list for him to review. Do whatever you must to avoid nagging and complaining. "It is better to live in a corner of a roof Than in a house shared with a contentious woman." (Proverbs 21:9)
- Be confident
- Have your own interests
- Use discretion in your speech, avoiding foal language. "As a ring of gold in a swine's snout So is a beautiful woman who lacks discretion." (Proverbs 11:22)
Keep the Mystery Alive by Guarding Your Tongue
Avoid idle chatter. Following your husbands lead will go a long way towards having an air of mystery. This is not about being secretive, it is the art of speech discipline. You can share each others lives without disclosing every detail on your mind.
"Even a fool, when he keeps silent, is considered wise; When he closes his lips, he is considered prudent." (17:18)
© 2014 Rain San Martin