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How to Survive a Bad Break-up

Updated on April 1, 2016

I’m not a relationship expert, nor am I a counselor you can seek for advice. I’m just as ordinary as any other woman, struggling through relationships as life takes her to another dimension.

Relationships come and go, leaving us with a bagful of experience and a broken piece of heart that can never, ever be replaced. Break-ups have never been a pleasant experience and all of us suffer the same ordeal from time to time. Many, like me, run away from relationships in general. But ladies, tell me, how long can you live in this fear like me?

Life is a blessing, and I believe, it shouldn’t be lived in the fear of losing yourself or your heart over a man! It’s true we have no control over our surroundings, but we can always battle it out. Break-ups are inevitable. Your partner may cheat, leave you for no apparent reason; or things might just not work out between the two of you. But can we stop going by our lives for this impasse? No. Absolutely not.

When we are more on the emotional side, that is, we feel emotions a little more strongly than others, we shatter like broken shards of glass and elude the universe after a break-up. Hence, I would like to offer you a couple of tips today, as to how you can survive a bad-break up and go on about life with cheery eyes and a cheesy smile.

i. Remove all traces of your ‘ex’ from your life; empty your closets of all his things, including the teddy bear he gave you!

ii. Erase him from all your social media accounts and clear away all texts, photos and chat messages. I know this may sound impossible at first but it will save you a lot of emotional trouble; especially when you will feel like going through his messages over and over again.

iii. Talk to someone. Whether it’s your best friend, sister or a random stranger; tell them how you feel. In that way, your brain will drain itself of painful memories and all of it will slowly become bearable.

iv. Get out of the closet! You may shut yourself down for a week, at max two. After that, you will start to choke on your own sadness and the loneliness will strangle you. So, get out of the house, go out and hang out with friends and family; or better still, take a walk on the streets alone.

v. Start something new. Take on something you always wanted to do, like taking a music class, dance lessons or sports.

vi. Write down how you feel. Putting your thoughts on paper helps to clear out your head and most importantly, makes you see yourself from a different perspective if you go through it afterwards.

vii. Lastly, Eat! Food gives you solace like nothing else. So, when depressed, eat! But do make sure you eat healthy and don’t let the carbs settle in.

Better still, to stop yourself from going through all this trouble, you could take note of a few things before you commence a relationship which might save you from a bad break-up in the first place!

i. Check on the guy before you hook up; a background check always helps uncover crucial information about a person

ii. Keep your guy under close observation; observing a person for a longer span of time will help you unearth the real him.

iii. Keep your emotions at bay for a while; in that way you can discover how deep you’re in love with him and if not, it will be easier for you to walk away

iv. Always keep your eyes open; this will help you to spot mishaps in your relationship

v. Keep your friends close and your partner’s friends even closer. In that case, you can always scrounge for a bit of extra information

vi. Always be honest with your partner. Be truthful and propel him to tell the truth.

vii. Choose your partner wisely before you enter a relationship.

All these tips may not help you survive a break-up or save yourself from an unfruitful relationship. But it will surely give you some ideas to avoid such a scene.

I believe break-ups are a part of life; they teach us many lessons and shape us to handle relationships better. Thus, if we face a break-up and when we face it, it's best if we know how to handle it.

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    • Shejuti Pasha profile image
      Author

      Shejuti Pasha 16 months ago

      Thanks for the appreciation.....Totally agreed...."if you want something different, you have to do something different"

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 16 months ago

      Great advice!

      I would also add don't just blame {him}.

      Each of us (chooses) our own friends, lovers, and spouse.

      Ideally with each breakup one learns how to choose more wisely for them self. If someone is experiencing one bad relationship experience after another it's probably time they reexamined their "mate selection criteria".

      The only thing all of your bad relationships have in common is (you).

      If you want something different (you) have to do something different!

      "Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."

      - Oscar Wilde

      One man's opinion! :)