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How to Tell if You Feel Real Love or Just Lust

Updated on March 23, 2013

If you love them for what they are, do not try to change them.

sometimes love means giving some space. You do not have to stick your nose in all of her business.
sometimes love means giving some space. You do not have to stick your nose in all of her business. | Source

Baby I love you but I am too busy tomorrow.

If we continue to prIoritize in the same way we did before falling in love. Then probably it is not love. On the other hand, if the being together becomes an addiction, then probably it is not love.

t is ok if love makes us do silly things. But if it causes us to do bad, wrong things it is not love.

If you are feeling pulled toward doing something you think is wrong, put the brakes on.

Any love is good loving. If it is not, it is not love.


People who talk about "the trouble with love". Do not get it. That is like saying, "i will not try because I may fail"

That is not OK! Low self esteem can in fact prohibit love from growing.


Some of us are not all that good. So remember that if someone loves you, be grateful.

"What does she see in me?"

For most the world I am an extremely self confident person. I need to be. For my ministry I have to be extremely confident in our Lord. But at home, my wife giggles at me and pats me on the back, saying, "you and our 3 year old have the same self esteem"

I reckon I am so worried about pleasing her, that I question my self. Usually it is endearing. But often I must kick that habit and do what I think is right. She did not marry a wimp and what ever she sees in me, I got to keep it up.

I was team captain both offense and defense of homecoming, But I found no worth in myself.

I have been blessed with love. But for some reason I did not think I deserved it. And yet I was not driven by lust.

I just loved the ladies. I was the escort for Miss Arizona, from my town. She won and I did not think I was deserving of her affections. She was the first Black lady considered. We were the first written up black/white couple in Arizona. Later I married a debutante from that state. And now my wife is a daughter of a true refugee of a war hero in Vietnam. Beauty surrounds me. My two daughters are impressively beautiful. Yet I never have felt worthy of a good womans' affection. Until just recently.

I say all this to let you know that no matter how wonderful the women in your life are, you can still screw it up with low self esteem.

So real Love is in me to understand. Superficial and sexual attraction love is not a good man's deal.

If you need to ask if you are in true love you are not. If you are truly in debt because of her, very cool. If your texts are only an hour apart. If you just cannot get the lady out of your head. You are an idiot and in love. Do not for a second think you do not deserve it.

If this be the case,,, get the heck off of the internet and go and shower her with the flowers.



Are you in love or not? If not, move on and help your spouse. I do not mean leave your spouse I mean leave the old you behind.

Bedrooms are not a perfect place for love. The only place for real love is in the heart.

This guy lets us know about our devotion.

We are sure you know people with degrees in philosophic studies, but do you know one with a bachelor science in that way
We are sure you know people with degrees in philosophic studies, but do you know one with a bachelor science in that way | Source

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    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      5 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Thanks Bill. And thank you for over looking all the errors. I will clean it up today. Hey! That is loving by example. I feel it.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 

      5 years ago from Olympia, WA

      There is a huge difference between making love and being in love, and you captured that difference perfectly.

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